does my body work against me?

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schwenkler22
schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So I've been thinking about losing weight again, but I'm wondering why i haven't been Able to keep weight off in the past... Is it my body or my mind that doesn't allow me to lose weight once and for all? I get stuck, and can't get myself unstuck so i fall back into my old patterns. I want to be healthier and in a body that can do more. Not stuck in one that holds me back. Advice, help, support needed.
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  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?
  • booksandchocolate12
    booksandchocolate12 Posts: 1,741 Member
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    When you have lost weight successfully in the past, what were your methods?

    "I'm going to cut out all sugar/bread/dairy [insert forbidden food du jour here]. I'm going to eat clean!!" And you proceed to eliminate most of the foods you love, leaving you with something difficult to sustain, so you binge and/or fall back on old eating habits.

    --Or--

    You eat the foods you like, in moderation, within your calorie goal, leaving you satisfied, rather than feeling deprived and able to sustain your new way of eating?
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,982 Member
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    It's not your body, it's your mind. This book on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for overeating was available in my library system.

    The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person

    Can thinking and eating like a thin person be learned, similar to learning to drive or use a computer? Beck (Cognitive Therapy for Challenging Problems) contends so, based on decades of work with patients who have lost pounds and maintained weight through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Beck's six-week program adapts CBT, a therapeutic system developed by Beck's father, Aaron, in the 1960s, to specific challenges faced by yo-yo dieters, including negative thinking, bargaining, emotional eating, bingeing, and eating out. Beck counsels readers day-by-day, introducing new elements (creating advantage response cards, choosing a diet, enlisting a diet coach, making a weight-loss graph) progressively and offering tools to help readers stay focused (writing exercises, to-do lists, ways to counter negative thoughts). There are no eating plans, calorie counts, recipes or exercises; according to Beck, any healthy diet will work if readers learn to think differently about eating and food. Beck's book is like an extended therapy session with a diet coach. (Apr.)
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,261 Member
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    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    Well, what I did was replacing what didn't work with something that worked:
    Instead of grazing all day, I meal plan and eat regular meals. The wait makes me more appreciative, and I enjoy eating more.
    Instead of cutting out things I thought I shouldn't eat, I eat some things more rarely and/or in smaller amounts. This also makes me look forward to the treats.
    Instead of trying to eat low fat, I eat naturally fatty food, don't drown stuff in sauce, but add just the right amount, to enhance flavor, and I can eat lots of vegetables now.
    I aim for variety and I am eager to try new foods. Lots of them are actually old foods, traditional, ordinary foods that I just somehow missed.
    I have started to love cooking.
    I prefer to not have any trigger foods at home, instead of obsessing over it, crave, and regret.
    Instead of *trying* to go to the gym, I *really* walk every day.
    Instead of fearing food, I embrace it.
  • booksandchocolate12
    booksandchocolate12 Posts: 1,741 Member
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    Ditto the suggestion of the Beck book. I think it's time for me to break it out again. I didn't follow all of her suggestions, but much of the book was helpful.
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    kshama2001 wrote: »
    It's not your body, it's your mind. This book on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for overeating was available in my library system.

    The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person

    Can thinking and eating like a thin person be learned, similar to learning to drive or use a computer? Beck (Cognitive Therapy for Challenging Problems) contends so, based on decades of work with patients who have lost pounds and maintained weight through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Beck's six-week program adapts CBT, a therapeutic system developed by Beck's father, Aaron, in the 1960s, to specific challenges faced by yo-yo dieters, including negative thinking, bargaining, emotional eating, bingeing, and eating out. Beck counsels readers day-by-day, introducing new elements (creating advantage response cards, choosing a diet, enlisting a diet coach, making a weight-loss graph) progressively and offering tools to help readers stay focused (writing exercises, to-do lists, ways to counter negative thoughts). There are no eating plans, calorie counts, recipes or exercises; according to Beck, any healthy diet will work if readers learn to think differently about eating and food. Beck's book is like an extended therapy session with a diet coach. (Apr.)

    Thanks for the referrence, I will check it out.
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
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    kshama2001 wrote: »
    It's not your body, it's your mind. This book on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for overeating was available in my library system.

    The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person

    Can thinking and eating like a thin person be learned, similar to learning to drive or use a computer? Beck (Cognitive Therapy for Challenging Problems) contends so, based on decades of work with patients who have lost pounds and maintained weight through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Beck's six-week program adapts CBT, a therapeutic system developed by Beck's father, Aaron, in the 1960s, to specific challenges faced by yo-yo dieters, including negative thinking, bargaining, emotional eating, bingeing, and eating out. Beck counsels readers day-by-day, introducing new elements (creating advantage response cards, choosing a diet, enlisting a diet coach, making a weight-loss graph) progressively and offering tools to help readers stay focused (writing exercises, to-do lists, ways to counter negative thoughts). There are no eating plans, calorie counts, recipes or exercises; according to Beck, any healthy diet will work if readers learn to think differently about eating and food. Beck's book is like an extended therapy session with a diet coach. (Apr.)

    Along with this book, her book The Diet Trap is a good read as well. It goes over some of the same things as the Beck Diet Solution but mainly focuses on different traps that we may fall in while losing weight (Emotional eating, dealing with family, falling off track, just to name a few).
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    kommodevaran wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    Well, what I did was replacing what didn't work with something that worked:
    Instead of grazing all day, I meal plan and eat regular meals. The wait makes me more appreciative, and I enjoy eating more.
    Instead of cutting out things I thought I shouldn't eat, I eat some things more rarely and/or in smaller amounts. This also makes me look forward to the treats.
    Instead of trying to eat low fat, I eat naturally fatty food, don't drown stuff in sauce, but add just the right amount, to enhance flavor, and I can eat lots of vegetables now.
    I aim for variety and I am eager to try new foods. Lots of them are actually old foods, traditional, ordinary foods that I just somehow missed.
    I have started to love cooking.
    I prefer to not have any trigger foods at home, instead of obsessing over it, crave, and regret.
    Instead of *trying* to go to the gym, I *really* walk every day.
    Instead of fearing food, I embrace it.

    In the past, I learned new habits and did them consistently. It seems I didn't care for those habits enough to see them through. Thanks for your advice and personal testimony. I will continue to try new approaches.
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.
  • ClosetBayesian
    ClosetBayesian Posts: 836 Member
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    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.

    I would think that losing a large amount of weight relatively slowly is preferable to losing and regaining the same 50lbs or so repeatedly.
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    ClosetBayesian wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.

    I would think that losing a large amount of weight relatively slowly is preferable to losing and regaining the same 50lbs or so repeatedly.

    You're absolutely right
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,261 Member
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    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.

    Try not to think of the end goal. Set yourself mini goals. Maybe less daunting
    Also don't give anything up if you don't want to
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.

    Try not to think of the end goal. Set yourself mini goals. Maybe less daunting
    Also don't give anything up if you don't want to

    Ditto. As someone who started with 150+ to lose and now only 15 from my goals, I agree that you simply cannot allow yourself to dwell on the end goal or to set rigid timeframes, numbers, etc. Even with 15 left, I can focus only on the next pound, or 5 at most. I also have found it EXTREMELY HELPFUL to have multiple goals in weight, strength, fitness, nutrition, steps, etc. That way when one area is slow, another is doing well and I always have progress to be happy about. It's not easy, but it's doable. For me, it's been easier than the thought & reality of staying morbidly obese, which I was.
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    lorrpb wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    schwenkler22 wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    My guess is that you haven't made new habits you like enough to prefer them over the old habits.

    I see truth in your statement. How can i like them more than my old habits?

    You will if you stick at it long enough and see great results

    Keep this thing simple. Eat what you normally eat but smaller portions. Be patient

    I think the fact that i couldn't see results for a long enough amount of time, i got discouraged and discontinued those habits. I have 200+lbs to lose which is a daunting number, if i don't see large quantities of weight loss quick enough i get really down on myself. The unknown of how long it might take for me to rid myself of the weight is also a fear.

    Try not to think of the end goal. Set yourself mini goals. Maybe less daunting
    Also don't give anything up if you don't want to

    Ditto. As someone who started with 150+ to lose and now only 15 from my goals, I agree that you simply cannot allow yourself to dwell on the end goal or to set rigid timeframes, numbers, etc. Even with 15 left, I can focus only on the next pound, or 5 at most. I also have found it EXTREMELY HELPFUL to have multiple goals in weight, strength, fitness, nutrition, steps, etc. That way when one area is slow, another is doing well and I always have progress to be happy about. It's not easy, but it's doable. For me, it's been easier than the thought & reality of staying morbidly obese, which I was.

    I like that you have multiple goals,that's not something I've ever tried. I usually set one strict goal. Thank you for the advice. Nice job on being so close to your goal.
  • Montepulciano
    Montepulciano Posts: 845 Member
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    I think I failed in the past because I tried to make to many big changes, too quickly. This time I have started slowly, a couple of small changes, then once they become habits, adding a couple more. This way I know that it is truly a lifestyle change, not a diet that I doing for a set amount of time. It is working for me so far.
  • xtina315
    xtina315 Posts: 218 Member
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    I have failed in the past because I gave up everything. I was low carb, cut sugar out besides natural suagars found in fruits, and ate bland. Make small changes, like instead of a cookie for every snack have a banana, or pineapple. You can still eat what you would like but in moderation.I've been eating all my favorite foods in moderation, and stick within my calorie bracket and never go over. I'm satisfied this time, and it feels different this time because I'm not so focused on food because I feel good, and can have my favorite munchies lol. Always remember its one day at a time. Losing weight can be scary for some, I know I was scared of the process (as silly as that sounds). Know that you can do it, change your mindset is key. If you keep telling yourself you can't or will never be able to do it, you will not accomplish your goals. YOU CAN AND WILL DO THIS!!
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    Thanks hun, very encouraging words, i appreciate it,
  • schwenkler22
    schwenkler22 Posts: 61 Member
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    Montepulciano wrote: »
    I think I failed in the past because I tried to make to many big changes, too quickly. This time I have started slowly, a couple of small changes, then once they become habits, adding a couple more. This way I know that it is truly a lifestyle change, not a diet that I doing for a set amount of time. It is working for me so far.

    Awesome, great plan, I'll have to give it a try.

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