Struggling with pain issues and alcohol *No JUDGEMENT*

Silvervixen79

Hi everyone, I have come to the realization that I am an alcoholic. I keep trying to quit and keep failing. This last time I managed three and a half days without a drop but caved last night and had 6 x 500 ml tall cans of budweiser.

1) I became an alcoholic because of pain issues, I have back problems, sciatica and riddled with arthritis
2) The pain is caused by my small frame not being able to carry my weight- I weight nearly 300 lbs and am only 5'3.
3) The alcohol and bad food choices that come with drinking alcohol, means the weight is just increasing.. I have gained 100 lbs just in the past 2 years.
4) More weight means more pain and more alcohol. Its a vicious cycle.

Anyone been/going through this? How did you stop the cycle?

chaamigo

I don't struggle with alcoholism. But wanted to offer a word if encouragement. They say admitting to the problem is half the battle.
Perhaps you could seek out a 12 step program in your community.

Keep working in your weight loss and check in to alternate pain options. Turmeric can be very helpful with inflammation.

I wish you the best of luck in all your efforts.

-Cha

SarahsFitMess

I have chronic pain due to arthritis and various joint problem I understand the struggle with pain management. I won't lie I've turned to liquor on my bad days just to cope. The thing is that it just adds new problems.
I won't even try and say I can fully understand what you're going through with the alcoholism. That's a struggle I've not gone through but I do know that addiction is no joke. Especially when the addiction is in part self medication.
Establishing a good support system is one of the best things you can do. Someone with compassion that understands the cycle you're going in through. Pain > alcohol > weight gain > increase of pain and depression then back to step one.
Finding good pain management is also key. I find relief in water. Not necessarily swimming (though it is an amazing exercise) but just laying back and floating. It removes the pressure and let's the muscles relax.
I'm still struggling with my cycle of comfort eating on bad pain days/depressed days but I know the less I weigh the less I'll compress my knees and the better I'll feel.
I'm on a big journey myself. I'm looking down the barrel of loosing 200 lbs. So if you ever want to talk about what you're going through I'd be more than happy to chat.

Jthanmyfitnesspal

It sounds hard. I can only say that, despite the popular wisdom that alcohol is "good for you" in moderation, I find that it only makes me eat extra calories plus the alcohol calories and makes me more groggy overall. I'm better off without it!

Your strength is in your honesty. Stay honest with yourself and people around you and I hope things will improve. Seek face-to-face support groups. Go into a program, if you can.

mbaker566

there are many types of recovery programs, 12 step, and aoda are common. AA is free. Should you be interested OA is free as well.
try to move. yoga can help you move more freely.
water aerobics, water jogging/walking can help take the weight off your joints
work with doctors with pain management, diet, and exercise

me, i have myalgia and behcets so pain is part of my life.

Silvervixen79

My husband doesn't see me as an alcoholic.. which is nice.. but I know in myself that for me it is an addiction. I mean, I can drink A LOT and wake up with no hangover. I often think about when my next drink will be throughout the day (although I never give in until the evening). When I try to quit by the end of the 2nd day I get jittery and my hands shake. I also cant sleep without it. I would say that is an alcoholic. I am a functioning alcoholic because I have a full time job, never get drunk etc.. but its still no better really.

sllm1

I would definitely encourage you to reach out for help with your recovery. Good for you on identifying the problem. You have made the first step!

LKArgh

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

My husband doesn't see me as an alcoholic.. which is nice.. but I know in myself that for me it is an addiction. I mean, I can drink A LOT and wake up with no hangover. I often think about when my next drink will be throughout the day (although I never give in until the evening). When I try to quit by the end of the 2nd day I get jittery and my hands shake. I also cant sleep without it. I would say that is an alcoholic. I am a functioning alcoholic because I have a full time job, never get drunk etc.. but its still no better really.

To be honest, it does not sound nice. It sounds like denial and not helping you get away from a self destructing path. If you have kids, it sounds also like neglect, to be blunt.
It sounds like you have managed the hardest part which is to accept there is a problem. Take the next step and reach out for help in real life. This is not an issue where online support or even support from relatives and friends will be enough. Talk to a therapist, look for support groups, talk to your dr.

Silvervixen79

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

To be honest, it does not sound nice. It sounds like denial and not helping you get away from a self destructing path. If you have kids, it sounds also like neglect, to be blunt.
It sounds like you have managed the hardest part which is to accept there is a problem. Take the next step and reach out for help in real life. This is not an issue where online support or even support from relatives and friends will be enough. Talk to a therapist, look for support groups, talk to your dr.

I dont have kids and even if I did they would not be neglected as a result of my drinking! If anything, these hypothetical children would be neglected if I didn't drink as I would be in so much pain I would not be able to do anything for them!![/quote]

GYATagain

Feeling your struggle and pain. Like folks have stated, acknowledging you feel there is a problem is a good step toward getting the help you will need. Hopefully you can find a Dr/therapist/nutritionist/personal trainer - someone to help you on your road to recovery. Recovery not just from the alcohol, but the weight issues and pain management. For some of us, pain is an everyday life issue and yes, I will admit freely to over indulging on occasion with too much alcohol. It used to be every day, then backed off to every weekend, and now I May have a glass of white wine on a Friday evening after the long work week - but, not often. Because I find if I have more than that, I Will overeat and feel like pooh the next day. I encourage you in your endeavor and wish for you the best. I live with a functioning alcoholic and am around others. The struggle is very real and my heart goes out to you. May 2016 bring you better health!

ClosetBayesian

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

Hi everyone, I have come to the realization that I am an alcoholic. I keep trying to quit and keep failing. This last time I managed three and a half days without a drop but caved last night and had 6 x 500 ml tall cans of budweiser.

1) I became an alcoholic because of pain issues, I have back problems, sciatica and riddled with arthritis
2) The pain is caused by my small frame not being able to carry my weight- I weight nearly 300 lbs and am only 5'3.
3) The alcohol and bad food choices that come with drinking alcohol, means the weight is just increasing.. I have gained 100 lbs just in the past 2 years.
4) More weight means more pain and more alcohol. Its a vicious cycle.

Anyone been/going through this? How did you stop the cycle?

I dealt with opioid addiction years back thanks to a chronic pain condition which has led to nerve damage. Opioids are relatively harder to obtain than alcohol (I had a prescription for fentanyl patches), but I've definitely been on the addiction bandwagon.

Talk to your doctor. See if you can get a referral to a psychologist. I'm personally not a fan of the AA model of addiction treatment, but it works for some people; you may want to check it out; but I'd personally recommend the psychologist instead. See if you can get on a 'script for the arthritis. Obviously losing weight will help, and if you quit the alcohol, that may help you lose weight.

I quit Fentanyl cold turkey - no medical assistance, no inpatient treatment, no Narcotics Anonymous. I decided I had had enough, and I stopped. It was a long, unpleasant three or four days of withdrawal. And then it was over.

Not everyone can do that; I sure as heck don't suggest it. That was also not my first go-round with addiction, so I knew what to expect.

I mange the pain. There are days I hurt a little. There are days I hurt a lot. It never goes away. I've come to accept it as part of who I am. I have learned to modify things so I can function. Losing weight has helped - I don't physically struggle with as much, so my body overall is under less strain, and the mental relief of that is fantastic.

I have three small children, a full-time career, and I am a full-time PhD student. The pain is part of who I am.... but not all of who I am.

Silvervixen79

ClosetBayesian wrote: »

I dealt with opioid addiction years back thanks to a chronic pain condition which has led to nerve damage. Opioids are relatively harder to obtain than alcohol (I had a prescription for fentanyl patches), but I've definitely been on the addiction bandwagon.

Talk to your doctor. See if you can get a referral to a psychologist. I'm personally not a fan of the AA model of addiction treatment, but it works for some people; you may want to check it out; but I'd personally recommend the psychologist instead. See if you can get on a 'script for the arthritis. Obviously losing weight will help, and if you quit the alcohol, that may help you lose weight.

I quit Fentanyl cold turkey - no medical assistance, no inpatient treatment, no Narcotics Anonymous. I decided I had had enough, and I stopped. It was a long, unpleasant three or four days of withdrawal. And then it was over.

Not everyone can do that; I sure as heck don't suggest it. That was also not my first go-round with addiction, so I knew what to expect.

I mange the pain. There are days I hurt a little. There are days I hurt a lot. It never goes away. I've come to accept it as part of who I am. I have learned to modify things so I can function. Losing weight has helped - I don't physically struggle with as much, so my body overall is under less strain, and the mental relief of that is fantastic.

I have three small children, a full-time career, and I am a full-time PhD student. The pain is part of who I am.... but not all of who I am.

I did go to see my doctor about 2 weeks ago, I admitted that I have been drinking to cope with the pain issues and that it wasn't really completely getting rid of the pain and the resulting weight gain is just adding to the problem. So she prescribed me Tramadol. When I got back home I decided to research Tramadol as its not something I've taken before and I always get paranoid about starting new meds (I've had allergic reactions to all sorts in the past) and basically the warnings and people getting addicted to them etc really scared me... so to date I have not tried them Maybe I will try it, not have any alcohol but try the Tramadol instead... have you tried it?

coalz

Alcoholism is serious & you should definitely seek help. So many people are high functioning alcoholics & go through life not realizing they have a problem. Because you are the one who recognized, you have a great chance for recovery success. AA meetings are free & offer great support & accountability. I think their philosophy of one day at a time & serenity prayer should be adopted by all!
You may not realize it but You've already begun your path to healing! because you are here at MFP, reaching out, and asking for help. And really, that's the hardest part! Diet & exercise are the 2 best remedies for your physical ailments. There's natural supplements you can take instead of pharmaceuticals. You just need to meet with a natraupathic DR who can help you. My opinion that western medicine Dr's will just want to write a prescription to treat symptoms not the cause.
Acupuncture is powerful & some places work on a sliding scale. It really helps with addiction & chronic pain & will force you to take some time to just be & meditate. Physical therapy & massage therapy can really help too!
Medical marijuana is non addictive & there are strains to treat arthritis. You don't have to smoke it & you don't have to get high. And if your in a state where it's not legal yet you can order online. If you're interested friend & message me. I will ask my horticulturalist friend what he would recommend for treatment.

cmriverside

There are forums on the internet that are specifically for Recovery from addiction - they are full of wisdom, encouragement and understanding. Maybe you could search for one? I know they would welcome you and they understand the struggle. I mean, you're certainly welcome to discuss this here, but I'm just saying there are other alcoholics out there to talk with who understand, and who have the same struggles.

andrea218

I have been sober for 15 years. Like you, I could not stop drinking, even though I desperately wanted to. I suggest you go to an AA meeting right now.

Tweaking_Time

One of my kids became addicted to opiates. It was a horrible 3 years. He is recovered now, a college graduate, and working full time :-) There is hope. Hang in there.

The 12-step programs were helpful for my kid and also for me. My wife wanted nothing to do with it. She was pretty hurt and upset.

I did Al-Anon (for families of addicts) while my kid did Alcoholics Anonymous (as opposed to Narcotics Anonymous - he wanted to stay away from the people he knew). The first meeting I attended was pretty easy and I had to stifle some smiles because a lot of what you see on TV happens in the meetings (like everyone saying Hi (Your Name Here) in unison. I felt like a tourist actually. I found it much more difficult to go to the second meeting...it meant commitment.

My kid and I both agreed the 10 minutes before the meeting and the time after the meetings were most beneficial...you would find a person with a similar issue and pick their brains. Which often would lead to meeting for a cup of coffee somewhere, which would develop into a support network of trusted friends. Like losing weight, conquering addictions has a much higher success rate with a good support network.

Friend request sent...

wisenbsd

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

Hi everyone, I have come to the realization that I am an alcoholic. I keep trying to quit and keep failing. This last time I managed three and a half days without a drop but caved last night and had 6 x 500 ml tall cans of budweiser.

1) I became an alcoholic because of pain issues, I have back problems, sciatica and riddled with arthritis
2) The pain is caused by my small frame not being able to carry my weight- I weight nearly 300 lbs and am only 5'3.
3) The alcohol and bad food choices that come with drinking alcohol, means the weight is just increasing.. I have gained 100 lbs just in the past 2 years.
4) More weight means more pain and more alcohol. Its a vicious cycle.

Anyone been/going through this? How did you stop the cycle?

I'm going to be direct here (tough love), if you're looking for answers in a forum then the cycle will continue unless you hold yourself accountable and take action. There's no magic pill and sobriety takes work and determination, which took me years to figure out. Go to meetings and seek professional help and get the medication that you need. There are also several different types of behavioral therapy that will teach you coping skills to deal with the pain and cognitive issues you're experiencing instead of reaching for that bottle. I've been there, got the t-shirt and I don't want to go back to the person I was before.

If anyone questions my advice, they should be formally educated such as myself. I am a certified chemical dependency counselor and I graduated Summa Cum Laude from one of the top programs in the US in this subject matter. I am also a graduate student in behavior analysis. Hope this helps and you're welcome to add me if you'd like.

jflanaganasl

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

ClosetBayesian wrote: »

I did go to see my doctor about 2 weeks ago, I admitted that I have been drinking to cope with the pain issues and that it wasn't really completely getting rid of the pain and the resulting weight gain is just adding to the problem. So she prescribed me Tramadol. When I got back home I decided to research Tramadol as its not something I've taken before and I always get paranoid about starting new meds (I've had allergic reactions to all sorts in the past) and basically the warnings and people getting addicted to them etc really scared me... so to date I have not tried them Maybe I will try it, not have any alcohol but try the Tramadol instead... have you tried it?

You admitted to your doctor that you're struggling with addiction and they gave you TRAMADOL?! That is an addictive painkiller and I would recommend seeking a second opinion before taking it. It won't help you to switch from one addiction to another simply to manage the pain; you have to address the root problems. Please go see another doctor, be honest with them as you have with us here, and see what they suggest.

LKArgh

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

To be honest, it does not sound nice. It sounds like denial and not helping you get away from a self destructing path. If you have kids, it sounds also like neglect, to be blunt.
It sounds like you have managed the hardest part which is to accept there is a problem. Take the next step and reach out for help in real life. This is not an issue where online support or even support from relatives and friends will be enough. Talk to a therapist, look for support groups, talk to your dr.

I dont have kids and even if I did they would not be neglected as a result of my drinking! If anything, these hypothetical children would be neglected if I didn't drink as I would be in so much pain I would not be able to do anything for them!!

[/quote]

You do not sound ready to give up. Or maybe ready but looking still for an excuse if you fail? Seek medical help. If admitting addiction is affecting your life and jsut stopping was easy for people to do on their own, there would not be that many addicts in the world. You have taken the first step, take the second and talk to a professional. Good luck.

SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage

I can relate to this, not because I've struggled myself, but because my father did. Chronic back issues and pain led him to abuse alcohol for many many years. He has been married twice and had four children. None of those six people, plus many more, have anything to do with him now. We all eventually made the difficult decision to protect ourselves from his addiction and sever the relationship.

The difference is that he never acknowledged he had a problem. He lost everything because of it. I'm glad you realize you have an issue. Please seek professional help to deal with it, and let your husband into the fold. The consequences of not dealing with it now can have disastrous long term effects.

Best of luck to you.

Terriers007

I can understand alcohol masked the pain. I also have severe sciatica from a bad fall and several rear end accidents. Admitting it is an achievement and doing something about it would be awesome. I'm going for epidural injections starting next week. Very frustrating because I cannot meet my exercise goals. I'm new to this way of losing weight and am getting frustrated. Hopeless in Florida.

CollieFit

It does indeed look like a very vicious circle. Your obesity causes you severe pain by causing your sciatica / arthritis etc or in the very least making it a lot worse. In an attempt to manage your pain (and I suspect also your misery...) you consume alcohol, which over time will not only add calories you don't need but will also cause it's own health problems and make is less likely for you to function well psychologically and physically.

You're in a hole and alcohol is your shovel with which you dig your hole deeper.

If I were in your shoes, I would try to find the courage to have a frank discussion with my doctor and look managing your pain more appropriately, support around reducing your problematic drinking and starting to reduce calories so you can reduce the weight, which causes the pain, which causes the alcoholism.

Best of luck.

ClosetBayesian

Silvervixen79 wrote: »

ClosetBayesian wrote: »

I dealt with opioid addiction years back thanks to a chronic pain condition which has led to nerve damage. Opioids are relatively harder to obtain than alcohol (I had a prescription for fentanyl patches), but I've definitely been on the addiction bandwagon.

Talk to your doctor. See if you can get a referral to a psychologist. I'm personally not a fan of the AA model of addiction treatment, but it works for some people; you may want to check it out; but I'd personally recommend the psychologist instead. See if you can get on a 'script for the arthritis. Obviously losing weight will help, and if you quit the alcohol, that may help you lose weight.

I quit Fentanyl cold turkey - no medical assistance, no inpatient treatment, no Narcotics Anonymous. I decided I had had enough, and I stopped. It was a long, unpleasant three or four days of withdrawal. And then it was over.

Not everyone can do that; I sure as heck don't suggest it. That was also not my first go-round with addiction, so I knew what to expect.

I mange the pain. There are days I hurt a little. There are days I hurt a lot. It never goes away. I've come to accept it as part of who I am. I have learned to modify things so I can function. Losing weight has helped - I don't physically struggle with as much, so my body overall is under less strain, and the mental relief of that is fantastic.

I have three small children, a full-time career, and I am a full-time PhD student. The pain is part of who I am.... but not all of who I am.

I did go to see my doctor about 2 weeks ago, I admitted that I have been drinking to cope with the pain issues and that it wasn't really completely getting rid of the pain and the resulting weight gain is just adding to the problem. So she prescribed me Tramadol. When I got back home I decided to research Tramadol as its not something I've taken before and I always get paranoid about starting new meds (I've had allergic reactions to all sorts in the past) and basically the warnings and people getting addicted to them etc really scared me... so to date I have not tried them Maybe I will try it, not have any alcohol but try the Tramadol instead... have you tried it?

I was far beyond oral meds.

If you do take it, you absolutely, positively cannot drink on it. Period.

Did you tell your doc you've been drinking to cope with the pain, or that you are an alcoholic? Because there's a distinct difference between the two.

You need to flat-out ask for a referral to a psychologist who specializes in pain management.

CollieFit

No! No drinking on Tramadol!!!

mbaker566

do not drink with tramadol. it is not a good combination.

@Tweaking_Time fellow friend of lois. it's been such a great help. There is nar-anon which is specifically for families and friends of narcotic addicts too

brb_2013

Address the alcoholism before you worry about weight loss. It's most important, it should come first. Seek out AA. I bet you'll see your weight decrease as you get control of your drinking.

It's good that you're seeking help. My roommate has a problem with alcohol and it's hard to watch someone so healthy decline so quickly. I'm sure your loved ones will be pleased to see you work on your addiction!

ClosetBayesian

brb_2013 wrote: »

Address the alcoholism before you worry about weight loss. It's most important, it should come first. Seek out AA. I bet you'll see your weight decrease as you get control of your drinking.

It's good that you're seeking help. My roommate has a problem with alcohol and it's hard to watch someone so healthy decline so quickly. I'm sure your loved ones will be pleased to see you work on your addiction!

For folks who are in chronic pain, the pain is probably the bigger issue. The OP's loved ones can be happy all they want, but that is irrelevant in terms of the OP's quality of life.