Success? Or Self-Sabotage?

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Replies

  • martyohio
    martyohio Posts: 5 Member
    I like this:
    "And I don’t lose control and “pig out” every day. Do you know why? Because I WANT to lose weight. I WANT to feel better. Most of the time I WANT to feel better and lose weight MORE than I want to eat a pizza and a bag of chips."

    What I don't quite get is: isn't that depriving yourself? A friend, trying to be kind, advised me "don't deprive yourself!" and I thought "crap, I deprive myself every day!" But they are deprivations I want to make. Does that make it not count as a deprivation?
  • natajane
    natajane Posts: 295 Member
    edited April 2016
    You know it's a bit liberating reading your posts. The first one your words stuck in my head about making choices. That food is my choice, no one else's. I can't tell you how that smacked me in the face, because actually my subconscious believes what I eat isn't my choice. My Mother, my husband, my friends - I feel they all dictate me a bit and that I let them down. Stupid right!? What the hell.

    This point about logging everything every day - I watched a seminar yesterday at work presented by a professor from Harvard. It was about bias. There were a few activities in there which pointed out how powerful our subconscious is. How we can be so focused on a task that we miss the ridiculously obvious or weird completely. Honestly it's so eye opening, watch something on you tube called "The Selective Attention Test"! I could not believe how blind 100% of the room was to it.

    I believe your point about logging is related to that selective attention, a way to get us out of auto mode of past learnings and show us all the truth - to stop being blind. That's so important, you're so very right!

  • mom23mangos
    mom23mangos Posts: 3,069 Member
    This is by far one of the best posts I've read on here.
  • lynder64
    lynder64 Posts: 285 Member
    juliayadda wrote: »
    I want to pin this to my wall and read it every morning!

    Me too!!!
  • martyohio
    martyohio Posts: 5 Member
    Okay! I don't feel deprived, even though I deny myself many foods many times ... because I have a secret treat that I love, and indulge in all the time! Lifeway kefir.

    It helps me choose to avoid those other foods since I know I'll be happy with the kefir.
  • bamfgoals
    bamfgoals Posts: 28 Member
  • godlikepoetyes
    godlikepoetyes Posts: 442 Member
    natajane wrote: »
    You know it's a bit liberating reading your posts. The first one your words stuck in my head about making choices. That food is my choice, no one else's. I can't tell you how that smacked me in the face, because actually my subconscious believes what I eat isn't my choice. My Mother, my husband, my friends - I feel they all dictate me a bit and that I let them down. Stupid right!? What the hell.

    This point about logging everything every day - I watched a seminar yesterday at work presented by a professor from Harvard. It was about bias. There were a few activities in there which pointed out how powerful our subconscious is. How we can be so focused on a task that we miss the ridiculously obvious or weird completely. Honestly it's so eye opening, watch something on you tube called "The Selective Attention Test"! I could not believe how blind 100% of the room was to it.

    I believe your point about logging is related to that selective attention, a way to get us out of auto mode of past learnings and show us all the truth - to stop being blind. That's so important, you're so very right!

    I will watch this! I do think that autopilot has everything to do with it. Habits are so hard to undo because it feels so good to stay on that well-groomed track in the brain--that little trough. After a while we will fight to stay in that trap while also not even being aware that we are even trapped in there. That's what it feels like when I want to eat the rest of the cookies in the bag, even when I don't really want them. Earlier, I decided to eat the rest of the cookies in the bag in my kitchen. I started out with the intention of eating two servings and I counted them out. But I had brought the whole bag up to my room and I knew the likelihood of eating more. I wanted to fool myself, then, when I knew I was going to eat the rest of the bag, I really wanted to ignore what I was doing. But I didn't. I ate all the cookies and kept myself aware the entire time. It's very odd to watch myself eat a bunch of cookies and not feel scared or guilty. I just feel like I ate a bag of cookies. It's a choice I made. I chose to do it. Part of me would rather I hadn't eaten them, but that old feeling of needing to punish myself isn't there. But good lord, it would be so easy to slip back into that old comfortable awful trap.
  • hannah82nz
    hannah82nz Posts: 20 Member
    Wow. I had to read this twice as my eyes were to watery the first time.
    Possibly the best advice / support / honest, heartfelt writing I've read on weight/food/dieting.
    I was literally halfway through a bowl of sugary cereal I had no intention of logging and I've chucked it.
    I'm saving this post to read every day.
    Thank you xx
  • hannah82nz
    hannah82nz Posts: 20 Member
    zyxst wrote: »
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    A hug from 10 would be enough motivation to do most things
  • meryl135
    meryl135 Posts: 321 Member
    I love your posts! Do you have a blog?
  • chatterbox3110
    chatterbox3110 Posts: 630 Member
    My sentiment entirely. I realised a long while ago this was going to be a journey of lifestyle change, not a diet.

    Keep going!

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  • godlikepoetyes
    godlikepoetyes Posts: 442 Member
    meryl135 wrote: »
    I love your posts! Do you have a blog?

    I do have a blog but I write about all sorts of things. godlikepoet.com I'm thinking of doing the blog on MFP, probably a couple of times a week.
  • PosterPens
    PosterPens Posts: 172 Member
    yesterday i went over close to 1000 cals. i didnt go to the gym. i also had a large cone from dairy queen and ate too many carbs, but you know what...its OK! the most important thing about losing weight is being honest with ourselves and not giving up. yesterday was yesterday, and today is another day. as i write this, im putting on my gym clothes and hitting the elliptical like i have been every day this week.

    a very huge thank you for this post!
  • godlikepoetyes
    godlikepoetyes Posts: 442 Member
    You are correct. Being honest. Logging all those calories no matter how angry or ashamed you feel.
  • DebBahr
    DebBahr Posts: 110 Member
    Excellent post! This is exactly where I am. Took me 50 years to get here.
  • triflerose
    triflerose Posts: 4 Member
    Man! Have you been spying on me? Awesome blog! this is so me! Going to have to bookmark this and reread it often! Thanks so much!
  • kimf412
    kimf412 Posts: 28 Member
    Thank you for this.
  • SeptemberFeyre
    SeptemberFeyre Posts: 178 Member
    edited August 2016
    I love your posts ❤️ Have you ever heard that pain/anger from your past and present on a subconscious level can contribute to fibromyalgia? Check out this book for help with it. It helped mine and my mom's and many others. I never thought a book could help with pain, but I am doing so much better. And thanks for the inspiring post!

    https://www.amazon.com/Mindbody-Prescription-Healing-Body-Pain/dp/0446675156/ref=sr_1_5?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1472064505&sr=1-5&keywords=Prescription+for+healing
  • glp724
    glp724 Posts: 48 Member
    Why can't I mark this as liked, insightful and awesome? This post is hands-down one of the best things I've read on this site. Well done.
  • dustedwithsugar
    dustedwithsugar Posts: 179 Member
    It was awesome. Can I add you to my friends?
  • ayreka7
    ayreka7 Posts: 198 Member
    Very inspiring post!
  • rosiecotton24
    rosiecotton24 Posts: 81 Member
    This is awesome. :) I'm 53 and working on losing, again. I have done pretty well the past month. I get frustrated when I get on the scales and it hasn't moved (I want to see it go down a pound everyday! Lol- though I know that's impossible). I KNOW what I need to do to lose. I've done it before, then got lazy and the weight came back on. For me, eating less and moving more usually works. When I lost all my weight before, I did not deprive myself of any of my favorite foods- I just ate less of them- and most people couldn't believe I still ate pizza, cookies, etc. I think one of our main problems is we want immediate results, forgetting that it takes time to lose.
    Everyone needs to read this.
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