Anyone else dealing with depression while trying to lose weight?

kcongel90
kcongel90 Posts: 95 Member
in Motivation and Support
I feel like my depression is creating a vicious circle, I feel bad about how I look and want to give up so I binge eat, sleep and stop working out. Then I feel guilty so I start to heavily restrict and work out a lot, and then the depression kicks in again and whispers in my ear "Nothing is changing, you're still fat and ugly. Why bother?" I feel like I'm obsessed with food, its all I think about. Maybe when my new job starts (dream job) I will stop focusing so much on eating all the time. Is anyone else going through this, or have in the past and fixed it?
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Replies

  • Sinistrous
    Sinistrous Posts: 5,589 Member
    Start small, until you learn how to control it.
  • RachNRoll
    RachNRoll Posts: 192 Member
    I was never clinically diagnosed (but I also never went to the doctor) so I don’t want to say that I was depressed, BUT I totally understand what you’re going through and the cycle. With me it always ended up with me crying in my boyfriends lap while he helplessly hugging me.

    He would then start his upbeat speech on how consistency is the key for everything in life, and how giving up is not an option because then nothing would change for me.
    He pushed me to the gym and taught me to lift heavy weights. He also insisted in taking “before” pictures (which I hated because I was so fat and round, but had no say in the matter). I can say that in 2 weeks of clean eating only and exercise there was a huge difference in my back (fat rolls disappeared). The number in the scale wasn’t going down still (maybe even going up) despite all the effort, that’s when I started to count calories and macros again and being strict with food.

    I’m like you, I’m obsessed with food and math, but I’m a routines kind of person and I like structure. I can understand that for some people it might be harder, but it helps to have a routine and a structure because then, when you feel like you need a “cheat meal” or a “treat” (for mind health) then you know that the structure is still there and it’s easy to go back to it again (drink tons of water to de-bloat, then go back to the old system).

    Life isn’t perfect still. I have my moments. Yesterday I even had an argument with the boyfriend because I ate a Quest bar that wasn’t in the plan. I felt frustrated because I felt like I failed. Saying this now kind of sounds ridiculous.

    The thing is, it’s hard. Don’t expect losing weight and getting back in shape to be easy without a structure and a plan (in my opinion). You shouldn’t heavily restrict as you say, but there will be some restrictions.
    There are 2 thoughts that usually help me: 1 - I love the feeling I get when I finish my daily food log and I’m on track; 2 - time will pass either way, wether you do something for yourself of not, so if you think 3 months ahead, you might have some results if you keep consistency or you’ll still feel miserable because you let the bad thoughts of depression take over.

    I’m halfway there, lost almost 6Kg so far. It’s been 3 months. I have to admit that I’m a bit disappointed with myself, I hoped it was more, but I also know that 3 months ago I was way more unhappy with myself. I also know for sure that if I keep it up, in 3 months my body will thank me.

    I hope my words were a bit helpful and that I didnt come up woo harsh. Sorry for my bad english (second language). Good luck!
  • mirandag57
    mirandag57 Posts: 37 Member
    Me :'(
  • kcongel90
    kcongel90 Posts: 95 Member
    Thanks you guys for commenting and letting me know that I'm not alone. I'll definitely think about this thread when I'm having weak moments.
  • saramickeydee
    saramickeydee Posts: 115 Member
    Yes.
    Small steps to build habits so even when I'm in the hole I do most things automatically.
    This has been a hard month. But I've still been exercising because that habit is getting pretty strong.
    Little things add up over time.
  • cesser1
    cesser1 Posts: 63 Member
    I know exactly what you mean. I had that problem last time I tried to get rid of my weight. Sadly, I gave up. Now I have found so many different explanations for non-budging weight on here that it seems more part of the process rather than failure. There seem to be quite a few people in the same boat of not losing for the first few weeks, and I am sure they will be giving you good advice soon enough on here. The one that I can pass on immediately, try measuring your body, as you may be building muscle and changing shape. That weight might not all remain fat already. Good luck to you. Don't give up. Look at the success stories. And know you are not alone with the depression or the desire to lose weight. You are doing your body good at the moment, whether it shows or not.

    Feel free to add me if you would like some more support on your journey.
  • Sinistrous
    Sinistrous Posts: 5,589 Member
    Of course. We're human. :pensive:
    Comes and goes
  • JordanHealthCoach
    JordanHealthCoach Posts: 14 Member
    Not sure if this has been suggested or not, but I found that having a therapist/counselor REALLY helped. Mostly because they can help you feel better about yourself and be your support. Most have experience with emotional eating and can offer guidance around that. My negative thinking rules some days, but I'm much better at shutting it up :)
  • kcongel90
    kcongel90 Posts: 95 Member
    I am excellent at being stubborn, so I will give that a shot :)
  • jamielikesyou
    jamielikesyou Posts: 25 Member
    Recovering (finally) after a year and a half long depressive period - one of the darkest I've ever had and one in which I gained 80 or so lbs after starting medication. On another med now that has not affected my weight as strongly and am now clawing back against both the depressive thoughts and the weight gain. Hoping to return to work soon. Not out of the woods yet but at least I can find my way back to civilization ;) Feel free to add me to friends if you need someone to talk with and for support ❤️
  • wannabesexymama
    wannabesexymama Posts: 367 Member
    I have been battling depression for as long as I can remember but on top of that ADHD and an Anxiety disorder. I also find it hard to focus and keep myself on track, I am fighting through lack of motivation right now as my gym closed down for renovations after 2 weeks of hard training for me trying to make a habit. I have been inactive most of this week and I am aggravated with myself I think I may get off my but and be stubborn and clean and mow the lawn. I need this for ME and My body. My medial conditions need to know I am in control! Working out tends to help with my depression focus and anxiety as well as my Blood Pressure!
    Good Luck girl may we both find what we seek!
  • kcongel90
    kcongel90 Posts: 95 Member
    Good luck to you too!
  • Dominique14614
    Dominique14614 Posts: 45 Member
    I have suffered from intermittent depression for a good part of my life. Depression helped fuel my obesity and obesity fueled my depression. It is a vicious cycle. I also had other factors contributing to both as well. I still have days where I feel it trying to sneak back up on me but I refuse to give it a foothold. Exercise has now become a therapy session for me both mentally and physically.
  • suevand
    suevand Posts: 9 Member
    ((hugs)) I've been there and still am with my bi-polar disorder. It was easy to put on so much weight until I got help.

    Your doctor will put you on a good antidepressant (make sure you get the weight neutral kind). Don't give up! Baby steps and one day at a time. I have been able to lose some weight by joining T.O.P.S. just over a month ago. Lots of help there, lots of encouragement and the nicest bunch of ladies I've ever met.

    ((Hugs again))


    kcongel90 wrote: »
    Thanks you guys for commenting and letting me know that I'm not alone. I'll definitely think about this thread when I'm having weak moments.

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Been there! And I did lose the weight... but I can't say it's helped my mental status much... now I'm just obsessed about not gaining it back...
  • ObsidianMist
    ObsidianMist Posts: 519 Member
    are you being treated at all? meds, and/or counselling/therapy of some sort? it sounds like your depression is pretty severe, that's how much I would be struggling without help. for me the right meds help a lot with the basic day in/day out stuff.
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
    Medication, therapy, self-care, and exercise are the things that keep me mentally stable. It's an ongoing battle.
  • kcongel90
    kcongel90 Posts: 95 Member
    I am on medicine for depression and anxiety, and my incredibly supportive husband is always there for me which is beyond priceless. And of course, my adorable pitbull and carolina dog are always good for cuddles.
  • riricici
    riricici Posts: 22 Member
    You are definitely not alone. I suffer from depression and have slight food addiction. I binge and hate myself, have a bad day and give up, and beat myself up for any mistake i make. Ive started this weight loss journey numerous times, and I'm in a much better place now to continue working toward my goal. There will be bad days, but there are awesome people here who can help motivate you and keep you on track. Make sure you're honest though, to yourself and everyone else...don't hide or sugar coat how you feel. Own it, don't let it own you.
  • armstong2001
    armstong2001 Posts: 1 Member
    I'm dealing with the same problem. Eating was always the only thing that made me feel better and kept me from cutting, but it isn't the way to live. If you need anyone to talk to, I'm here and I understand. I myself am trying to lose the twenty pounds I gained due to stress, and my one piece of advice would just be try to find someone to work for. Doing it for someone else really motivates me to do better
  • jlizk
    jlizk Posts: 20 Member
    I don't have advice because I'm in the same position, but if you want to add me please do.

    Though I'd echo a lot of the above posts. Small steps x
  • LeoZandi
    LeoZandi Posts: 38 Member
    Oh man it's very hard depression is..
  • AminaMitchell
    AminaMitchell Posts: 26 Member
    same here ive got depression and i'm getting bigger and bigger and bigger. It's hard
  • pearce8888
    pearce8888 Posts: 32 Member
    Hey mate I have Tourette's syndrome aswell as depression ocd and anxiety. I'm on heaps of meds and it all really gets me down. I feel like the meds are restricting weight loss and always feel that I can't do anything about my weight. The past three weeks after communicating with people on this form I have finally found motivation to stick with a diet and I have been successful. Stick with it I wish you the best of luck
  • leviathas
    leviathas Posts: 37 Member
    A view I take is instead of seeing eating well and exercise as a way to look good, or lose weight, but I see it as a way to manage depression. When I feel really down, I try to remember how exercise helps me feel better. The worse I feel, the more I realize I need it. Not sure if that helps but the shift helped me. Also, cycles are normal but it is most important that you continue to push forward and try. Good luck!
  • GoldaTyla
    GoldaTyla Posts: 19 Member
    Been in depressed state for quite some time this past year; weight's up; feeling frustrated and angry with myself. Trying to get back on track with respect to diet, walking, feeling good about me, etc. It's a long haul back to a weight where I'm comfortable but I'm willing to put in the effort. I know that the depression will recede if I can get out there and look after myself and meet my goals. Wishing everyone success in their attempts and looking forward to my success as well.
  • fit4itall
    fit4itall Posts: 101 Member
    Yes, but no perfect advice. The best thing is to keep pushing and don't give up. Set mini goals so it doesn't seem so overwhelming. Ex/instead of saying "I need to lose 50lbs and can't", start with a goal of 5lbs and give yourself a non-food related reward ex/pedi. Keep "celebrating" for every 5lbs you achieve.
  • aprilkorn
    aprilkorn Posts: 26 Member
    I've been there. I had success few years ago with MFP but then fell into bad bout of depression. I am just getting back at it now but was telling myself I will start tomorrow for the last six months. I took a sick leave from work 8 months ago which meant I had no reason to get up, sat around in stretchy pants so now that it's time to get back at it none of my previous professional clothes fit. It can be tough cause it's so easy to fall into a pattern of blah. I would always say ok in an hour I'm going to do something motivating or I would eat something really bad amd think oh well today is already blown so might as well eat like crap for the rest of the day. Yes depression sucks , set little itty bitty goals if you need to to start. Eventually as you start meeting those goals, increase them and soon you will feel better and will help keep the depression at bay. When you feel yourself slipping into depression remind yourself how much you don't want to go back there. During my last bout of depression I wrote a letter my not depressed self and visa versa when your up write a letter to your down self.

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