Needing support

ProfAlly

I am a full time teacher, wife and mother of a 2 year old boy. I have lost 31 lbs since my son was born but have 54 to go before I reach my "goal weight." When I was younger I stayed fit, was motivated and kept thin. Now, I can't seem to get a handle on it.

I want to be healthy for my son, for me, my family...I want to have a 2nd child but want to be healthier first. I need support in staying on track and not seeing food as a reward for a hard days work. Or see it as enjoyment or recreation. I think I have gotten so consumed by my other "roles" that food is all I allow myself. So dieting..taking that away is harder than it was when I was younger, single and active.

I don't know if anyone out there has ever felt this way. I try to explain this to my husband. And he's supportive, but it's easier for him. I would greatly appreciate any support someone can offer.

Thank you,
A

jenngitch

So I don't think you need motivation. You have motivation: Your son. What you need is determination. You have to reach the point you are determined to get healthier. Take the word diet out of your vocabulary. This is a lifestyle change. Get a scale, pre-log your food. Take healthy snacks to school, and get moving. get out and play with you son... dance with him.... chase him. You can have a career, a family AND be healthy. Good luck! and congrats on the 31 lbs loss so far. You CAN do it!!

ProfAlly

Thank you! I am trying to not make excuses and continue to do well. We have a scale and weigh my food, do all you say. I will move with him more often and be more involved. I try to do it all -clean house, raise my family, be a great friend and wife to my husband.

brightresolve

I do understand this. There are times when I've identified that food is the only "discretionary pleasure" as in something I could turn to at any time, for just me, without having to negotiate or interact with anyone about it or pre-plan or take excessive time I didn't have.

I don't really have a solution to offer, but I can say that for me, there's like a switch that flips when I am sick of using food "out there" to fix the problem of me not feeling prioritized in my own life. I then suddenly see saying NO to the momentary pleasure in service of a happier, healthier future FOR ME - not for anyone else, motivational as family is - as the reward, in and of itself. And mild hunger or denied cravings for sweets sweets sweets as the sign that I DO love myself enough to say that hard-in-the-moment NO.

Good luck, congrats on your loss so far, and you can do this. Your words show great self-awareness. Keep working with that, the answer for so many of us is in the emotional layer, not the mechanics of it.

djspacecaptain

I agree you already have the motivation and need determination but also you need willpower. Determination will not work without motivation and willpower will make sure you succeed. Motivation would be the reason why you want to lose weight and change your life style. Determination will be all the hard work and effort you put forth because of your motivation. Willpower will be your mindset to keep you on track as well as your self control when you get faced with bad food vs healthy food.

Learn to love the process and not just the number on the scale. There will be times where you put in so much hard work and effort with only little to no reward. The body is weird and has a mind of its own. Just keep at it and with time (lots of time) the rewards will come.

In your case (im only speculating since you have a busy life) your weight loss will be primarily due to dieting. So as long as you keep yourself eating healthy and in a deficit the weight will eventually come off. Just keep up the good work!

ProfAlly

Thank you all. I try to take it one day at a time and focus on it daily. I'm a planner Nmand plan our meals each week. I need to take care of myself like I do my son and husband. I need to be a priority.

djspacecaptain

You making yourself a priority will add to your motivation and willpower. Use everything you can to help yourself.

A trick i have learned that you can have : When faced with temptation take a breather and take a step back before you decide. In your mind (practice makes perfect) manifest the temptation into a tangible object (i choose a baseball) and literally throw it as far away from you as possible. I like to think i am holding a baseball bat and i am able to hit the temptation so far away from me.

If done right the temptation will be gone. the trick is in manifesting the temptation. Once you got that part down getting rid of it is easy.

ProfAlly

I like that idea! Thank you! I will try it!!

djspacecaptain

Your welcome. It works for me and you can use it on all temptation not just eating unhealthy.

ScienceLady

I am also a full time teacher and mom! I have 2 littles, 20 mo and 3 mo. Down 20 and I have 80 to go to goal. Add me if you want to!

Fillet007

I have two kids a 9 yr old and a 16 month old.... I know so close together not