fighting this depression

KendalBeee

:sad:

On top of treating me like absolute crap, my husband cheated on me and I left him in December. Ever since then, we've been trying to sell the house cause neither of us can afford it on our own. (I currently live in it, he moved out but continues to pay half the house payment but none of the utilities) We were selling it on our own for several months until I finally decided I was tired of it and got a realtor. We had our first open house yesterday and no one showed up. No. One. Showed. Up. :sad: I've had to start paying back my student loans and every time I look at my finances I want to crawl in a hole and die. Seriously, I have $139 this month for food and gas and all the other random things to buy ($28 for my car taxes, I wore my shoes till they have holes in them- absolutely had to get new ones, I need an oil change, I had to get two new tires and that went on a credit card). When I started my job two years ago, they said we could work from home within a year. Six months later they took that option away. I have a 40 minute drive to/from work every day so I easily spend $200-$250 on gas alone (I have a Mustang that I'm upside down on the loan and unable to trade in). I've applied for part time jobs everywhere and haven't even gotten a single call back.


I'm normally a pretty level headed person but all this is really really getting to me. I ate because of depression for the first time in a VERY VERY long time yesterday and I want to do it again today. :sad:

laclarke

Hang in there Blombie!!!! Resist the urge to drown your sorrows with food!! As comforting as it may feel at the moment it will only leave you feeling worse about your situation. Think of how much effort it has taken to lose those 35 lbs and how easy it is to put it back on (trust me I know!!!) Looking good and feeling good is the BEST revenge regarding your horrible husband that cheated on you!!! You deserve better than that!! Those tasty comfort foods will leave you feeling just as disappointed and lonely!! You WILL get out of this hole, it may not feel like it but hopefully things can only get better. Hopefully you have some supportive F&F that you can talk to during this difficult time. Rather than food choose exercise as a way to cope and relieve your stress and frustration. Good luck:flowerforyou:

Liv_Curry

Financial troubles are never good and always extra frustrating. Try a rummage sale (to include anything your ex left behind), you would be surprised how much that could bring in. Have you posted your house on Craigslist.org. I find it helpful for buying and selling. As far as the depression goes, i find a good long walk very helpful.

I found myself taking a personal loan from a family member, with a contract, to help when i needed to get out of a rut.

Best of luck!

tuesgirl1031

I am not going to try and blow sunshine up your skirt. But just try to let go of the things you have absolutely no control over.. The stupid cheating husband, the real estate market, and all the little day to day things that happen that you can do nothing about. At this point, live one day at a time. Dont be afraid to ask for help, (family, friends, church ect) The only thing you have control over is what you put in your mouth. And if you can win one small victory with that, It may make the other things less scary.Good luck to you, and I will be sending good thoughts your way.
Peace!

Nina74

Blombie:

Hang in there! You have so much going on....it's only natural to want to turn to food for comfort. Do you have any close friends, parents, family members you can talk to about your stress? I tend to eat when emotionally upset, and I have found I need better outlets than food, because that never solves my problems (only has created more for me).

Someone wrote that you shouldn't feel bad to reach out and ask for help- whether it be church, etc. Rummage sale, Ebay, etc extra stuff to get "rid" of things. Although it is not perfect, you could put your loans on hold (although collecting interest) for financial difficulties.

And your idiot husband cheated. I know he pays the house and you pay the utilities.....but is his situation any better? Unfortunately, economically this is not a good time- surplus of houses, labor force, etc. so it is hard to sell a house or change jobs. Could you rent out your house and cover most of the bills?

Hang in there. If you do mess up, forgive yourself and move on. You certainly have a great deal on your shoulders.
:flowerforyou:

Nina

KendalBeee

Thanks for the support. I went home and cried yesterday (at least thats better than going home and eating). I realized I did the math wrong. I don't have $140 at the end of this month....I'm in the hole $140 this month after paying the bills. I have a few things I can sell, but it won't be much. I still have a decent amount in savings that I'll have to use.

I had a realization this morning that maybe God is keeping the house from selling so I won't have to put my dog outside. She's a 50lb boxer mix who is the sweetest thing ever. For the past 6 months, I've let her sleep in the bed with me and she's gotten used to it. When the house sells, I will hopefully be moving in with friends (or maybe family) and Lexi will have to go outside on a tie out. :frown: I really don't want that for her. So hopefully I will find a second job somehow and I can afford to stay in the house till it sells, even if it takes years.

I applied at Party City for a second job and talked to the hiring manager (this was about 2-3 weeks ago). She said they will be hiring a seasonal crew of about 30 for Halloween. I don't need a seasonal job, but she said it could possibly turn into a part time job afterwards if I do well. I have absolutely no doubt I will do an excellent job as I have all kinds of retail experience, including retail management. She told me to call her back the second week of July....I'm just hoping that the job starts by August.