Helping the other half to lose weight - is it doable?

valerieuk1708

Hi guys,

I was wondering if anyone has any experience with losing weight as a couple and if it's doable if I'm the one to track us both?

My other half has gained lots of weight after a bad knee injury that resulted in surgery and long long recovery, it's still not 100% after 12 months post-op. He can't exercise and leads very sedentary life style (office job).

Iv used his stats to calculate calorie deficit and set up a weight loss goal of 1lbs a week, which is slow and steady. Now I know as someone who's 300lbs he will be losing faster to start with which is fine.

The other thing is ... He isn't willing to track himself and not opposed to me doing it since I'm the one who cooks anyway. He hasn't got a habbit of eating everything in sight and will eat only when hungry so no worries he will be eating in secret. He said Im more than happy if you track. Is it doable?

Now as for me I've been tracking for 35 days and getting disciplined, so I know I can do it. Already lost 13lbs and seem to be on a right track.

Any comments would be appreciated! Thanks!

KateTii

If your partner is willing but just can't be bothered tracking, it is doable. It will be time consuming logging twice but as long as you account for his calorie needs vs your own - I can't see why not.

2011rocket3touring

Doable especially if he tells you when he snacks.

JustAnotherOneOfThoseGirls

wow, congratulations on the weight loss so far! Yes, it's completely doable to lose weight as a couple, it might even keep you motivated. As long as you can keep up the demand of having to log everything you eat, as well as everything he eats, you'll do fine, although it may start to drain your patience and willpower, although you sound as if you willing to put in the effort for both of you. If you've got separate accounts setup for you and your partner, they'll also be no problem of confusion and getting your diets and progress muddled up, however, when eating out, or having complex meals, it might be handy to keep a journal or notepad around to track each of your intakes, as remembering one person's eating is hard enough on its own. Good luck!

DEBOO7

When I started my weight loss journey 2 years ago my other half had a lot of weight to get rid of too. Same story... with me doing the tracking etc. It was ok for a while, but there was no compulsion to jot down what had been eaten for lunch or snacks... it was all guess work. And then the interest died away and I decided I needed to focus on me!
Part of the journey is logging and understanding what you're eating - it's a journey you do for yourself because you want/need to do it.
I've lost 75lbs... and the other half put the lost weight back on and now thinks I'm too skinny!

valerieuk1708

Yes he can't be bothered and I have created a separate account for him which is on the website and I use mine on the app. I realise it will take twice as much dedication to track for two but I'm willing to try as I want to help him!

As for eating out, yes it's great idea to put stuff into notepad to log later. It's going to take me some time to understand how to cater for someone who needs more calories than I do! My intake is 1700cal and his is 2400cal. He is also a very picky eater and won't eat veg and fruit unless it's a smoothie of some sort. It's going to be hard but something must be done!

MultipleHigh5s

Also you can copy meals from someone else's diary to your own diary to save a little time.

valerieuk1708

DEBOO7 wrote: »

When I started my weight loss journey 2 years ago my other half had a lot of weight to get rid of too. Same story... with me doing the tracking etc. It was ok for a while, but there was no compulsion to jot down what had been eaten for lunch or snacks... it was all guess work. And then the interest died away and I decided I needed to focus on me!
Part of the journey is logging and understanding what you're eating - it's a journey you do for yourself because you want/need to do it.
I've lost 75lbs... and the other half put the lost weight back on and now thinks I'm too skinny!

I thought about what you said in terms of understanding what you eat and be accountable for yourself but I see no other way out of it! If I don't do something he will only be gaining or staying an overweight person, no joy in that.

I'm going to give it a go! He isn't an emotional eater like I was, he doesn't like sweet stuff much or junk. I think his portions are out of control and ratio of carbs vs protein is way off!

His typical day would be eating little breakfast like cereal with milk or sandwich, lunch would be 3-4 pieces of bread with cheese or whatever he finds in the fridge, soup sometimes but then again lots of bread with it, dinner would be massive in terms of portion, it would be spaghetti Bolognese or steak and potatoes etc.

He also works from home so fridge/cupboards are right there. I am away most of the day and only eat what I pack (well-planned!)

Jeyradan

My partner and I are doing MyFitnessPal and weight loss together. He's the one who decided he wanted to lose weight, but he doesn't like the fiddly details of tracking or the time it consumes. As I do all of our cooking, he's totally happy to have me track and doesn't mind updating me if he has a snack or anything like that (although he does forget to mention it sometimes...)

Long story short: it's totally doable, and we've both found that having a cheerleading partner has helped!

valerieuk1708

Jeyradan wrote: »

My partner and I are doing MyFitnessPal and weight loss together. He's the one who decided he wanted to lose weight, but he doesn't like the fiddly details of tracking or the time it consumes. As I do all of our cooking, he's totally happy to have me track and doesn't mind updating me if he has a snack or anything like that (although he does forget to mention it sometimes...)

Long story short: it's totally doable, and we've both found that having a cheerleading partner has helped!

Thank you! That gives me hope! My partner knows and acknowledges the fact he needs to lose weight and he would love to do calorie restriction but he doesn't want to weigh and measure and input things into tracker. I asked him to update me on any snacks/drinks etc he would have throughout the day and he is happy to oblige.

I suppose only time will show how well that would work ... But your story gives me hope! Thank you!

valerieuk1708

MultipleHigh5s wrote: »

Also you can copy meals from someone else's diary to your own diary to save a little time.

Excellent tip! Thank you very much!

SezxyStef

my son lost almost 50lbs not tracking.

He just cut back on his food and moved more.

I personally would not track for someone else as I feel if they want to lose weight they will figure it out either through tracking or just eating less.

randomtai

SezxyStef wrote: »

my son lost almost 50lbs not tracking.

He just cut back on his food and moved more.

I personally would not track for someone else as I feel if they want to lose weight they will figure it out either through tracking or just eating less.

So much this. He needs to take responsibility for his own health

LivingtheLeanDream

If you are basically in charge of what/how much he eats then there's really no need to log his food - not when you log your own. As a guy he'll be able to eat a lot more and still lose anyway.

I logged my cals to lose my weight, my hubby didn't - but like you, he just ate what I gave him so he didn't realise it but he was averaging 2500-3000 calories a day and losing weight easily.

He and I have both maintained our weight loss for 3+ years.

StealthHealth

I do the cooking in our house and track all of Mr StealthHealth's and my own food. I batch prep lunches, send her off to work with her lunch and snacks and send her a TXT message telling her what is our evening meal and supper and if there is an afternoon snack for her.

I usually populate my own diary early in the day, close it down then log into her account and copy the meals across. I often have to drop a few snacks out of her diary since she has less cals to play with than I do.

Totally do-able and neither of us see it as her relinquishing responsibility for her health. It is just much more practical than any other system that I can imagine.

It's worth pointing out that Mrs StealthHealth doesn't have access to phone or computer throughout the day and so couldn't pre-log even if she wanted to.

jennifer_417

If you're both willing and actually want to, and you have excellent communication throughout, them yes. Just take care not to let resentment build in either of you for any reason.

valerieuk1708

Thank you guys! Great advice!