Comparing yourself to others?
Lilymckay2015
Posts: 7 Member
in Chit-Chat
Okay, this is something I have completely stopped doing, but today I realised I now weigh less then a girl I work with! She's also shorter then me, I'm not saying she is fat or I am better then her, but I used to always think I would be happy at her size, and tell myself I couldn't achieve it! But I did and I feel amazing, still not going to wish I looked like someone else but it's good to know something you used to think was out of reach for you isn't. I feel like I've had a lot of breakthroughs today, I love myself more and more each day and it helps me achieve my goals, I want to love my body and treat it well. This community is really motivating and I feel like my goals are now in my reach!
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Replies
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Hi good for you in achieving your goals, it does spur you on when you see real results is that you in your profile pic? If it is you look amazing!!0
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meh aslong as you dont let it define you progress its fine. There will always be someone bigger, faster, stronger, better looking, more intelligent, slimmer, richer blah blah blah you get the point.2
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Mr_Stabbems wrote: »meh aslong as you dont let it define you progress its fine. There will always be someone bigger, faster, stronger, better looking, more intelligent, slimmer, richer blah blah blah you get the point.
I agree, I only compare myself to someone else if there's a particular aesthetic that I like. However, it's important to realize that not everyone is made the same. I just worry about trying to be the best me I can be and let everyone else be themselves.
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jessieshanks1981 wrote: »I'm working on it though!!:)
You're gorgeous, not sure why your have self esteem issues. Don't judge yourself based on what others think. You have to love you for you. Anyway, confidence is what a lot of people find attractive, and a great personality. A hot body is just icing on the cake with a great personality or a fly in the wine without.0 -
I think women in particular are really bad at playing the comparison game. It sucks.1
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jessieshanks1981 wrote: »I'm really bad at doing this. I've gotten better but I always compare myself to others and think everyone is skinnier, prettier, etc than me.
yeah i feel this , its easier to just not care so thats what i try to do0 -
I really could care less. I don't compare myself to others. I did when I was younger and much more foolish.
I learned that if you are constantly comparing yourself to other people, you will never be happy with yourself for long enough. I do compare myself to previous versions of myself, I really don't see anything wrong with that. It never effects my mentality though because I realize I am working towards a goal.
When I go to the gym for example, I usually just keep my head down and listen to music. Other people stare at me when I'm working out, and its not like I'm the only person in the gym that people stare at, but when I look up, or look in the mirror during sets, I catch people all the time.0 -
jessieshanks1981 wrote: »I'm really bad at doing this. I've gotten better but I always compare myself to others and think everyone is skinnier, prettier, etc than me.
My worst problem, but it's MUCH better than it was in my teens and twenties.0 -
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evilsnowangel wrote: »I'm horrible at comparing myself to others. I don't have the same issue you do... I need to lose about 45lbs... and while MFP is great and all my friends are very supportive so many of them look amazing and/or are achieving results that make it hard for me to maintain my motivation at time. I wish I could stop but I try to channel it into something positive. (just not always successfully)
Whilst comparing to others is useful, perspective is needed at times like this. The only person you should compare to is the last workout, last weigh-in.
That's the key.
I'm a tall broad guy, I cycle up hills lots, comparing to a 5'5 140lb guy on a super light racing bike is insane. I can't beat him up that hill.
But I can beat me.2 -
It is funny I use to never care what I looked like. All through school I was a mess. Messy hair, messy face, sweat pants and tshirts. I never was concerned with appearance in the least. I didn't start caring till I got older and people actually called me cute for the first time. And once I realize I wasn't that bad looking I put some more effort into it. Then I backed off and was like I'm naturally pretty no need to do all these. And just put small effort in. Then I found my fiance and we moved in together. I started getting stressed out by work and poor health. I started looking horrible. My skin, hair, everything and gained so much weight. When I saw another woman who use to weigh more than me be smaller than I was when I first started working here I was like wow what am I doing? And I started getting so worked up about needing to feel pretty again. And I'm trying really hard now to calm myself down and tell myself I am still pretty and I'm being silly.0
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jessieshanks1981 wrote: »Thank you, that's kind. My sweet husband tells me every day that I am beautiful....one of these days I'll believe it!!:)
I tell this to wife all the time and I don't think she always believes it either. But I wish she would, because it is the truth. I can't speak for all husbands of course, but my gut tells me that they are not lying to you when they say this, we really do think our wives are breathtakingly beautiful.2 -
@Lilymckay2015 wrote: »Okay, this is something I have completely stopped doing, but today I realised I now weigh less then a girl I work with! She's also shorter then me, I'm not saying she is fat or I am better then her, but I used to always think I would be happy at her size, and tell myself I couldn't achieve it! But I did and I feel amazing, still not going to wish I looked like someone else but it's good to know something you used to think was out of reach for you isn't. I feel like I've had a lot of breakthroughs today, I love myself more and more each day and it helps me achieve my goals, I want to love my body and treat it well. This community is really motivating and I feel like my goals are now in my reach!
Hang on. You've been a member for 10 days, have a total of 7 posts and yet over 30,000 likes on your profile pic?
The likes aren't on here. That is a screenshotted pic from instagram.0 -
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@megzchica23 wrote: »@Lilymckay2015 wrote: »Okay, this is something I have completely stopped doing, but today I realised I now weigh less then a girl I work with! She's also shorter then me, I'm not saying she is fat or I am better then her, but I used to always think I would be happy at her size, and tell myself I couldn't achieve it! But I did and I feel amazing, still not going to wish I looked like someone else but it's good to know something you used to think was out of reach for you isn't. I feel like I've had a lot of breakthroughs today, I love myself more and more each day and it helps me achieve my goals, I want to love my body and treat it well. This community is really motivating and I feel like my goals are now in my reach!
Hang on. You've been a member for 10 days, have a total of 7 posts and yet over 30,000 likes on your profile pic?
The likes aren't on here. That is a screenshotted pic from instagram.
Ah, gotcha! So one gets 30,000 likes on a pic of themselves but still has "comparison" issues? I would think that 30,000 is pretty good affirmation that they are liked.
That's a pic from a swimsuit company IG account.....1 -
jessieshanks1981 wrote: »I'm working on it though!!:)
You're gorgeous, not sure why your have self esteem issues. Don't judge yourself based on what others think. You have to love you for you. Anyway, confidence is what a lot of people find attractive, and a great personality. A hot body is just icing on the cake with a great personality or a fly in the wine without.
Some people develop self esteem issue if they been hurt, betrayed, lied to or abused
Exactly. And it's hard to over come that.0 -
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Comparison is the thief of joy3
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I think I am better than this thread.2
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Lilymckay2015 wrote: »Okay, this is something I have completely stopped doing, but today I realised I now weigh less then a girl I work with! She's also shorter then me, I'm not saying she is fat or I am better then her, but I used to always think I would be happy at her size, and tell myself I couldn't achieve it! But I did and I feel amazing, still not going to wish I looked like someone else but it's good to know something you used to think was out of reach for you isn't. I feel like I've had a lot of breakthroughs today, I love myself more and more each day and it helps me achieve my goals, I want to love my body and treat it well. This community is really motivating and I feel like my goals are now in my reach!
Very good . Self love and value for yourself is a great way to live . Its your birthright to be happy and want the best for yourself . Surround yourself with great people and mentors and you will always move forward in a positive direction .1 -
I compare myself to others constantly. Poor world. It's just not good enough.0
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Like @finny11122 said. Self love is awesome1
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