"You don't need to lose weight"

girl_inflames

I've been being told this from the beginning...it's extremely discouraging. I was at almost 200 pounds when I decided this was just too much and I needed to do something about it. I'm now down to 162 and this whole entire time I've been told "You don't need to lose weight" or "you're healthy now" etc. I have another 12-15 pounds to lose...and it's becoming increasingly discouraging to hear this from people around me.

Does anyone else go through this with those around you? And how do you get through it?

Dvdgzz

Of course. To the average person, overweight is the norm. I was told I didn't need to lose when I was 212 lbs. Do what makes you happy.

AngelicaSamuelsson92

Oh yes. Especially from my friends and boyfriend.
It's really hard sometimes.
I just say to myself that it doesn't matter what they think of me it's what I think of myself and if I wanna changed something I will.

JessicaMcB

I get this constantly now and I also have about 16 or so pounds left to go (maybe more, we'll see when I get to 140 ykwim?)- its so frustrating but I just have to ignore it and remember they are speaking from a place of ignorance. It ranks right up there with, "Are all these kids yours? They CAN'T BE!" and "Are your oldest two twins?" in annoying statements I frequently hear -_- . Hang in there!

Need2Exerc1se

Oh yeah, all the time. But everyone that told me that was fat so I just ignored it.

emdeesea

Oh yeah, I'm being told by friends that I should just stop because I'm starting to look as thin as Kate Moss. LOL Uh no, Kate Moss doesn't carry a tire on her belly.

The person who said that people aren't used to seeing others at a normal weight, I think this is it. Being overweight is just so common, it's unusual to see someone who is reasonably fit.

Becaroo94

Yes I have lost 30 lb since the new year and am starting to get family telling me that I don't need to lose much more weight. They see me as skinny and slim and healthy but it's because they're used to seeing me so overweight. I still have another 12lb to lose before I'm at the top of a healthy BMI

CharlieBeansmomTracey

I hear that often or "you are wasting away to nothing" these people have seen me when I was thinner so how do I now (20+ lbs more) look like Im wasting away? I hate comments like that.

kaylajane11

Need2Exerc1se wrote: »

Oh yeah, all the time. But everyone that told me that was fat so I just ignored it.

Haha so much this. I mentioned to some of my, ahem, heavier friends that I wanted to lose another 10 pounds. They both shouted "TEN POUNDS?!?!?!" and proceeded to tell me I was crazy and "too focused on a number." To put it in perspective, a ten pound loss would put me in the mid-upper range of a healthy BMI. Hardly malnourished or "too skinny."

Ant488

True! I almost lost 20lb.

RoseTheWarrior

I honestly feel this comes from people trying to be overly nice. I have many neighbors that comment on my weight loss in this way... "you're wasting away", "there's nothing left of you", etc... when clearly I have another 30-50 lbs to lose. Sure, I'm way thinner than I was, but I'm not "wasting away". I'm not even AVERAGE yet. I think they're complimenting me, but should rather just say, "you're doing very well" or "you've obviously lost a lot, how much more are you planning on losing?" Just take it with a grain of salt and keep on keeping on. Don't let other people rule your emotions or goals.

upoffthemat

This is why we have to do it for ourselves. Ignore everyone else.

girl_inflames

Thank you everyone for your replies! You've given me a lot to think about and made me feel a lot better about it. I understand people are mostly trying to just be nice when they say things like that but it's discouraging because they're telling you basically not to do what you're working so hard to do...

Cysso

When I was at my goal weight (both times...) I had many different people ask why I was bothering to watch what I ate. "You're so skinny. I don't know why you bother." And such.

My grandmother would also tell me "don't lose too much weight. You'll look like a skeleton." I was 5 lbs over the max of the weight range for my height (5'4" I was 153 lbs at the time). That really hurt my feelings, especially since I didn't feel like a skeleton.

I explained to my friends that I wasn't always "skinny" and I wanted to stay "skinny" (personally I prefer the word 'fit', but I was using their words) and I just told my grandmother that my weight was where it should be. I also talked to my husband and mom about it as needed (they help keep me motivated).