Help! Gain weight won't stop

loorita90

Hi everyone!
I am 23 years old and 5.2 feet tall. I need help.

I am helpless. I don't know what to do.
It all started 3 years ago when I started counting calories just for fun (I thought). It turned out to become anorexia!
MY beginning (and healthy) weight was at 49 kg (108 lbs). I lost a lot restricting my calorie intake to no more than 200 kcal a day.
I went down to 34kg (34lbs) until I realized that I was close to dying (and my family also made me recover..)
Anyhow. This lowest weight was in November 2011, after that I stopped counting calories and just ate as much as I wanted (turning out in huge binge sessions every night) I gained weight fast -> it was June 2012 I had 42kg (92lbs) and December 2012 I weighed 48kg (105 lbs)

I somehow was worried about gaining so fast and got back to bad eating habits. I starved most of the time but then, of course the binges got even worse so I consumed about 3,000 calories at the end of the day. Soon I was at 53kg (116lbs).
But since I hit this weight I started restricting back a lot. I set my goal to 600calories a day but sometimes it can even be 1000, or 12000. No more than that.
I weighed myself again and I gained 3kgs (7lbs) AGAIN!! I am currently at 56kg (123lbs)!!

I want this weight gain to stop. I knew after recovering from anorexia there would be a rapid weight gain until you reach your normal weight. But what is wrong with me right now? It seems like it wouldn't even stop if I fasted every day. Should I lower my calorie intake???

please help me.

I opened my food diary, sorry it is in German but maybe you'll understand anyway

evileen99

You should really seek out a therapist who deals with eating disorders. They work with dieticians to help you get back to normal eating patterns and a normal, healthy weight.

loorita90

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Crystalynn84s

Your metabolism is probably out of sorts. They say to eat 6 small and healthy meals a day along with exercise and you should maintain your weight or at least get to where you want to be at a healthier pace. How old are you? I hope you can be comfortable in your skin and not worry so much what the scale says. I think we all fall victim to that and I commend you for asking for help and sharing your story. Feel free to add me if you would like. Best of luck to you.

tootchute

I read some where a woman's daily intake is 2000 calories, so I don't understand why you are gaining weight. I also thing 123 isn't something to get terrible bent out of shape for, but I agree you might want to seek out some professional help.

loorita90

Oh sorry: I am 23 years old and 5.2 feet!

miqisha

I am so sorry you are going through this, I cannot begin to imagine how difficult it must be for you. The 1200 calories believe it or not maybe too low, based on what your body has been through. Try to make your eating as clean as possible and try increasing your calories and workout and drink tons of water

However, it may be a good idea to see a dietitian who can help guide you and steer you in the right direction. Someone mentioned a plan above they used that might work, do your research and see if you can find what works for you, so you can get your system used to a healthy routine, because right now it seems its out of sorts and storing everything as fat, which can be the reason for the weight gain.

Good luck

__Di__

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Go see your doctor and therapist. It is irrelevant why you are gaining, get yourself sorted out first.

loorita90

apart from needing help (which I'm sure I do but I want to try to tackle the probem myself just as I got out of being extremely underweight without professional help)
Does anyone know why I'm still gaining?

JossFit

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Because 1200 calories is probably still only about HALF of what you should be eating, so your body is still totally stressed out. Add to that the damage you did previously, and you have a recipe for some serious metabolic adaptation. Your body is under stress, and therefore it's not going to start releasing fat and leveling out at a healthy weight until you eat the right amount of food.

loorita90

But I've been eating "normally" since I started recovering. ( 2012 - today)
I had my daily 2000 (and more) for about 1 year. And I was gaining weight (of course).
So my body should be recovered now, and not in a "starvation mode" anymore?
It had more than 1 year time to get back to normal functioning.
I can't continue eating more than 2000 because it will only lead to further weight gain...?
that's why I restricted again

chantels1

You are at a healthy weight for your age and height, I do not understand the need to restrict calories. You are obsessed with a number and not fitness. You need to rethink your goals here. Do you want to be healthy or do you want to be anorexic. I understand you don't want to become overweight. None of us do, but when you slipped into anorexia, you confused your body, and now that you are healthy, your metabolism is screwed up and you are going to have to give it some time to recover. This may mean weighing more than your goal weight, but being healthy is more important than your goal number! I would exercise and eat right with a minimum of 1500 calories per day. Make them healthy calories. You may want to have your thyroid tested with your doctor in the meantime. He may scoft at the idea of a 123 lb woman asking for a thyroid test, but if you are gaining no matter what your calorie count is, it could be your hormones out of whack. So explain all the details to your Doctor and see if he/she will rule out thyroid issues. Also do some studying on recovering from anorexia. You are still struggling, so educating yourself is the best thing you can do! Good luck!

silken555

Loorita, I'm sorry to tell you but it will probably take far more than a year for your body to sort itself out. It can take years and years which is why people here are telling you to seeing a dietitian and therapist that specializes in eating disorders and recovery. As admirable as it is to try tackling this issue on your own, you are probably setting yourself even further back without the proper knowledge and support. You basically really, REALLY screwed up your body and it's on major survival mode right now. If you don't want to slide back into an eating disorder, please find those specialists ASAP!

loorita90

I got my thyroid tested and everything seems fine!
I have been studying on this topic for 2 years now. Everywhere it says that You will first gain weight but it will go down again.
So I knew what would come. However it just doesn't feel healthy anymore. It feels like something is wrong inside my body.
Should I get my insulin resistance tested. Someone messaged me telling me my sugars were way too high. I always believed in the calorie system as functioning the same no matter what enters the body -it all becomes an entity of energy. If you don't consume that entity it will be stored.
I don't trust any specific diets. I think you should have all three components carbs, protein and fats. (but very low fat)
what do you think?

maybeazure

I think you restricted calories too much. 600 calories is too little for anyone, even someone trying to lose weight.

I agree with others that it really would be a good idea to talk to a professional, simply to get a personalized plan. You don't have to talk to them forever, just long enough to get you started maybe. Going up and down in weight isn't healthy. I bet a nutritionist would be able to help you figure out how to maintain weight, and I think that would help your anxiety a lot.

j6o4

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

You screwed up your metabolism by undereating way too much, now your gaining at a calorie intake that you should be losing weight at. Might as well add some resistance training so that if your still gaining hopefully it be in the form of muscle, so that way when your metabolism is recovered by Not undereating that you can take it slowly this time and eat at a moderate deficit to get the body you want. Do it slowly and keep as much muscle as possible when you lose weight so hopefully the weight you lose is fat. if you lose more muscle than fat then that means your bodyfat percentage will go up and you wont be lean.

loorita90

Thank you for your help, support and kindness!
I appreciate all of your answers. I just found the address of an endocrinologist. I will go see the doctor soon.
Please, if there are more people who can come up with ideas or maybe even went through this. Pls answer to this thread or message me. feel free to add me as friend.

rachseby

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, I went through something similar. Instead of spending tons of money on doctors, I just bought this plan from a weight loss/fitness site on tumblr. It was only $10 and you lose 1 lb a day without starving or doing anything unhealthy. I know it sounds like it won't work but it actually does. I can find the link if you want.

STOP telling an anorexic how to lose weight.

This!

Aviendha_RJ

Based on your height, 1200 calories may not be a deficit sufficient to cause weight loss. At 5'2" it may be closer to what your body generally NEEDS on a day to day basis. 123lbs sounds like an excellent weight for 5'2", there really isn't anything wrong with that.

At this point, I would recommend tossing your scale. You seem too obsessed with it. I say stick to healthy foods, avoid anything deep fried, snack foods, and eat mostly protein, fruit and vegetables.

Just exercise. Make that your obsession instead of your scale. Worry about how you FEEL, screw the numbers. A friend of mine (recovering anorexic: was at her lowest 85lbs at 5'6") is now a healthy distance runner at a size 2.... but she only has about 15% body fat. Girl looks great. I'd say she likely weighs about 130-135lbs. She's also become a professional drug & alcohol counsellor, because her dietician and anorexia counsellors were such a help for her. She didn't feel that becoming a counsellor for eating disorders would be emotionally healthy for her... but she appreciated her counsellors so much, that she wanted to do for other people what they did for her.

Check it out. Counselling won't kill you. Anorexia can.

lilcassers

Because your body is going into starvation mode. 1200 is very low. You need nourishment.

I think you need to seek a professional for this.

loorita90

do you all really believe in the "starvation mode" myth? I read so much about it. I came to the conclusion that it is very unlikely to happen. maybe if you do not eat anything at all you body may retain all the fat for a little bit but eventually will lose it after a while

VorJoshigan

I somehow was worried about gaining so fast and got back to bad eating habits. I starved most of the time but then, of course the binges got even worse so I consumed about 3,000 calories at the end of the day. Soon I was at 53kg (116lbs).
But since I hit this weight I started restricting back a lot. I set my goal to 600calories a day but sometimes it can even be 1000, or 12000. No more than that.
I weighed myself again and I gained 3kgs (7lbs) AGAIN!! I am currently at 56kg (123lbs)!!

This paragraph demonstrates your problem, and indicates that you are still working through your recovery.

I do not believe in starvation mode, but wild swings in caloric intake like what you are doing may not be healthy, and may have a harmful effect on your metabolism.

I would double down on the therapist advice, and add that whatever you do with your diet from here on out, do it slowly. Dietary "shortcuts" like 600 cals a day pave the road to disaster.

Hugs!

ddky

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Because you have totally screwed up your metabolism. You need to see an RD, but until you do, use an online calculator to figure out what your maintenance calories would be an do that for several weeks and then gradually decrease your calories, aiming for a slow and steady weight loss. Good luck to you.

unoriginalusername007

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Hey there! Wow,34 pounds... that sounds scary. Honestly, anorexia is a constant cycle, and you don't want to get stuck in it. If you were eating really little and became anorexic, and then gained weight, and now are eating under 1200 calories again, you're just going to send yourself back into the anorexia can't stop restricting and can't stop losing weight mode. I know it must be irritating to you that you're above the weight where you started, but before you try dropping just a few pounds, I would definitely wait until your body is back to normal again. Try to maintain for at least a few months first so your metabolism gets working normally again, your health and hormones are all back to normal, and you get your eating under control. I'm not sure if you knew this, but if you eat too little, your body will gain weight. You can see for yourself many people on MFP have said when they've restricted too much they've gained, and when they increased their calories they actually lost. I know that might sounds weird to you, since you ate really little before and managed to lose weight, but you have to understand that your metabolism is all out of whack right now, and besides, that's not a healthy way to lose weight. For now, eat about 2000 calories a day for a couple weeks, and see if you gain any more weight at the end of those couple weeks. Chances are your body's going to need every morsel of that food and you're not going to gain more than a pound in that time. (Now, I had a friend who had anorexia, and when her dietician boosted her to eating 2000 calories a day from her previous 1000 she obliged, however, she weighed herself the next day and was concerned that she gained two pounds. Weight fluctuates based on the last time you used the bathroom, how much you drink etc. so don't weigh yourself right away and then go back to eating ridiculously small amounts of food because you think eating 2000 calories a day will make you gain 2 pounds a day. It won't. It'll replenish your body of nutrients lost and won't be enough to make you gain. It takes 3500 calories extra for one pound of fat.)

Anyway, my number one piece of advice for you right now is to try to eat normal- try not to restrict and try not to binge. Aim for a healthy 2000 calories a day for a little while until your body gets back into sorts. Please don't put it into starvation mode again by eating 600-1200 calories- whether you believe in it or not, though I saw my friend first hand in starvation mode... Even if you don't believe in starvation mode, that number of calories daily still isn't healthy since you'd beat eating below your BMR which is the minimum number of calories needed to keep your heart, liver, brain etc. functioning properly. That's why anorexia is so fatal; when you aren't eating enough your body doesn't have the energy it needs to keep your organs working efficiently, organs fail, and after putting yourself through that for long enough you can wind up dead. It's scary, really. I know the cost of a dietician might be a little expensive, but I also suggest just try setting up a few sessions so you're at least heading in the right direction.

Good luck! Try not to fret about weight gain right now; you were almost dead- you said it yourself- so the way your body responds to food right now is way out of sorts.

MightyDomo

You'd be suprised but you are getting to a normal healthy weight range with the gains you've had already.

I used to be anorexic, was for years on and off, and I can guarantee that you will have little control over your body until you exercise regularly and eat to maintain and not lose. Your metabolism basically stopped, your body has been trying to survive the entire time you have been doing this which means it is in fat storing mode. By building muscles and going to a healthy diet to maintain the weight you currently have you will be able to burn the fat and can help your metabolism go back to normal.

As someone noted before you will probably need to eat multiple times in a day, snacking is your best bet instead of full meals. Plan out your snacks to meet your dietary requirements and do minor strength and cardio training to get started.

Best of luck and honestly you will need to be patient and probably see a doctor to ensure you are doing all the right things to get back on track and return your body functions to normal.

knitwit0704

First of all, you can GAIN by eating too little, sometimes. Your goal shouldn't be at 600. But listen, I know how hard this is. I'm in recovery from anorexia as well, so I know how it can be. But you can do it! Up your calorie intake, track your exercise, eat those calories back, if you can, and, if you want, I'll help you to find your maintenance calories to eat to maintain your weight. If this doesn't help, and even if it does, go to a doctor. There could be some underling problem.

Also, many people in recovery from eating disorders have messed up their metabolisms in the process, so you need to figure out by slow increases and decreases what your maintenance calories actually are. Message me if you need help.

knitwit0704

Based on your height, 1200 calories may not be a deficit sufficient to cause weight loss. At 5'2" it may be closer to what your body generally NEEDS on a day to day basis.

This isn't true. Her TDEE is above 1200. Now, with a messed up metabolism, MAYBE it's what she needs, but for her metabolism to recover, she needs to eat more than that.

1princesswarrior

As a person with an obsessive personality, I would make sure you have a strong support system and at least one person you can trust who won't judge you. Have that person weigh you once a week.

I feel for you and I don't know the right advice to give you except try to eat a balanced diet with plenty of protein, good fats, fruits, vegetables, and fiber. Also, see your doctor and ask about what type of vitamin deficiencies you might have and how you should fix those. Malnutrition, whatever the cause, really screws up your body. When I was a teenager I became anorexic from an illness and dropped to 80 pounds at 5'3" simply because I could not hold anything down. They did many blood panels and my mineral balances were so messed up they had to fix those before they could address me gaining weight at a steady rate. I got the same illness in college and the same thing happened. My doctors put me on a medically supervised diet though. I would recommend doing that if you have the ability.

Best wishes to you. Feel free to message me if you want to talk or any more details.

knitwit0704

But why am I gaining weight right now even if I eat no more than 1200 calories?

Hey there! Wow,34 pounds... that sounds scary. Honestly, anorexia is a constant cycle, and you don't want to get stuck in it. If you were eating really little and became anorexic, and then gained weight, and now are eating under 1200 calories again, you're just going to send yourself back into the anorexia can't stop restricting and can't stop losing weight mode. I know it must be irritating to you that you're above the weight where you started, but before you try dropping just a few pounds, I would definitely wait until your body is back to normal again. Try to maintain for at least a few months first so your metabolism gets working normally again, your health and hormones are all back to normal, and you get your eating under control. I'm not sure if you knew this, but if you eat too little, your body will gain weight. You can see for yourself many people on MFP have said when they've restricted too much they've gained, and when they increased their calories they actually lost. I know that might sounds weird to you, since you ate really little before and managed to lose weight, but you have to understand that your metabolism is all out of whack right now, and besides, that's not a healthy way to lose weight. For now, eat about 2000 calories a day for a couple weeks, and see if you gain any more weight at the end of those couple weeks. Chances are your body's going to need every morsel of that food and you're not going to gain more than a pound in that time. (Now, I had a friend who had anorexia, and when her dietician boosted her to eating 2000 calories a day from her previous 1000 she obliged, however, she weighed herself the next day and was concerned that she gained two pounds. Weight fluctuates based on the last time you used the bathroom, how much you drink etc. so don't weigh yourself right away and then go back to eating ridiculously small amounts of food because you think eating 2000 calories a day will make you gain 2 pounds a day. It won't. It'll replenish your body of nutrients lost and won't be enough to make you gain. It takes 3500 calories extra for one pound of fat.)

Anyway, my number one piece of advice for you right now is to try to eat normal- try not to restrict and try not to binge. Aim for a healthy 2000 calories a day for a little while until your body gets back into sorts. Please don't put it into starvation mode again by eating 600-1200 calories- whether you believe in it or not, though I saw my friend first hand in starvation mode... Even if you don't believe in starvation mode, that number of calories daily still isn't healthy since you'd beat eating below your BMR which is the minimum number of calories needed to keep your heart, liver, brain etc. functioning properly. That's why anorexia is so fatal; when you aren't eating enough your body doesn't have the energy it needs to keep your organs working efficiently, organs fail, and after putting yourself through that for long enough you can wind up dead. It's scary, really. I know the cost of a dietician might be a little expensive, but I also suggest just try setting up a few sessions so you're at least heading in the right direction.

Good luck! Try not to fret about weight gain right now; you were almost dead- you said it yourself- so the way your body responds to food right now is way out of sorts.

I agree with this, all of it. Exactly what I would have said, but someone said it for me.

susannamarie

The fact that you have your goal set at 600 cal/day makes it seem like you really haven't recovered, or that you have relapsed. Honestly.

I would think that a dietician who specializes in eating disorder recovery would be able to best help you.

loorita90

Thanks again! I appreciate those answers.
I think I got my blood tested recently and the doc said it was everything fine, except I have a Vitamin D deficit....