Feeling down, burnt out

mom22dogs

This is more of a vent than looking for support or motivation. I just didn't think it fit anywhere else.

I have been on MFP off and on for several years. I would track consistently, then life would get hectic and I would forget. I've been tracking again since around March I think. I've also been going to the gym consistently since 2008, with the exception of about a year when I was sick. After I recovered, last summer, I joined a different gym that I felt would be better for me.

It has been great. I've gotten so much stronger, my heart rate has gone down, I can see a lot of definition in my shoulders and arms, etc. Overall, my fitness is great.

In about February I decided I wanted to try to lose some weight, so I started paying attention to how much I was eating, started tracking calories here. I lost 12 lbs from the day I joined the gym, until 3 months ago at my last weigh in. (I am disabled and can't weigh accurately on platform scales, or smaller scales, so I have to weigh in a hospital bed. Just giving background on why I don't weigh very often). I also can't really get an accurate weight anyway because of my shoes, leg braces, clothes, etc. We subtract about 15 lbs to account for them. My shoes are at least a lb a piece, and braces even more.

I'm ready for my next evaluation (I get them every 3 months at the gym) so I had the lady weigh me Saturday. I gained back 7 lbs in 3 months. I feel thinner, but obviously, gained. I got burnt out on working out, so didn't go for a couple of weeks. Then I've been busy and was unable to go a few times due to being sick, my dog being sick, other things came up and couldn't get to the gym. I was also getting burnt out on constantly counting calories, weighing, etc.

Since I over ate over the 4th weekend, thought maybe I was still retaining water, so the lady at the gym said she would weigh me again tomorrow if I wanted, to see if I had lost water weight. I drank a gallon of water yesterday, and almost a gallon again today to try to flush the excess out.

I know I need to get back to the gym, and I need to watch calories again. I'm just frustrated at the weight gain when I don't feel it. I could understand if my jeans were tighter, but I'm actually looking smaller in some areas.

Not looking for advice, I just need to get back into it whether I feel like it or not. I'm just not feeling it and I'm mad at myself for gaining weight again.