Just lost my job, my motivation and my willpower in one fell swoop

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  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    Rocknut53 wrote: »
    Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to respond. There is good advice there and I appreciate it. I think that seeing a counselor is also a good suggestion.

    I had more or less made my peace with leaving my line of work after my accident and surgeries, since I simply cannot physically do what I used to do. After I got hurt I just didn't get called for jobs like this any more. I went three years without getting a job that involved travel and adventure. So that's part of why I got so excited and put so much stock into it. It just validated this very essential part of who I am (was?) and the career that I love(d). I saw the Alaska job as my way back in after a long time away.

    I guess I'm still in the "acknowledge the suckiness" part of this process. :)

    I thought for a minute I had written this. I have been and currently am in your shoes. The past couple years as well as back in 2008-2009 have not been kind to me as an (aging) oil field geologist whose career didn't kick off until I was in my 50's. My job for the past 6 months has been to shed this extra 40 pounds so that when I can get back to work I am better physically prepared for the work. My work has taken me lots of places I never would have seen otherwise and I truly miss that. I take it day to day now, some days suck, others not so much. Alaska was my dream when I was in college, then life happened and I never went there to work. It's not off the plate though, the company I work for when I work, picks up contracts there now and then so I just keep my fingers crossed that something will fall into place. Good luck to you, try to think positive and keep on with your physical improvement so when it happens, you'll be ready.

    I'm sorry to hear that you are in the same boat. It sounds like you have lots of positive and potential avenues coming up, and I was really inspired to read that your career didn't kick off until you were in your 50's. Sometimes I find it terrifying that I'll never work for a stable company and have a set career path, and other times I find it incredibly exhilarating. That being said, I'm hoping the pendulum swings back over to "exhilarating" soon. ;)
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    I feel for you. I really do. I lost a dream job too (my boss sold out his business). It hurt. My DH and I had to sell our house. Everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment. I let it hold me back for far too long though. I moved to another job, but I still felt so betrayed and angry that it was affecting my new job too. I finally decided to go for counseling, or I thought I actually might get fired. I saw a psychologist that was provided by the employee assistance program. After a few times going I also decided to see my doctor about anti-depressants. It was the BEST decision I ever made in my entire life. Everyone around me has noticed a huge change in my attitude. I'm always a work in progress, but I'm miles and miles from where I was.

    Please, don't let this affect you for too long. The past is gone. There's nothing you can do but put yourself in a better place going forward. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    "everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment"

    I'm so sorry -- that must have been so tremendously difficult for you. I am SO glad that counseling and anti-depressants worked for you. I have set up an appointment with my therapist. She helped me deal with PTSD and anxiety after my boat accident and I'm hoping that I can make some progress again.
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    nowine4me wrote: »
    Sorry to hear about your situation. Any chance you could go to Alaska anyway to spend time backpacking and hiking? There may be some type of hiking/camping/fishing expedition group you could join so you could still get the experience.

    Thank you for your kind suggestion. I have been there many times and love it and will go back some day on a vacation. But we have money stress right now and that what was what made this opportunity so appealing -- to be paid to work in a place that I love.
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    JenHuedy wrote: »
    Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to respond. There is good advice there and I appreciate it. I think that seeing a counselor is also a good suggestion.

    I had more or less made my peace with leaving my line of work after my accident and surgeries, since I simply cannot physically do what I used to do. After I got hurt I just didn't get called for jobs like this any more. I went three years without getting a job that involved travel and adventure. So that's part of why I got so excited and put so much stock into it. It just validated this very essential part of who I am (was?) and the career that I love(d). I saw the Alaska job as my way back in after a long time away.

    I guess I'm still in the "acknowledge the suckiness" part of this process. :)

    I completely understand where you're at right now. I was laid off from a career I loved. I didn't think I'd ever get another job in my field. There just aren't that many in my area and relocation isn't in the cards at this point in my life. I fuddled along in odd jobs for a year or so and on a whim applied for a job I didn't think I had a chance of getting. I got that job and it was more amazing than I could ever have dreamed. I was so proud of the company I worked for, had the best co-workers I'd ever worked with and really felt that they were happy with the work I did. That gave me the confidence to quit smoking and lose 90 pounds so I could be the kind of person who had an amazing job for an amazing company.

    Then my entire world came crashing down. I got laid off from the Dream Job. I don't know how, but I managed to keep it together. I think one of the main reasons was that I used the confidence I'd developed from that job and from running to keep on the path I'd started. I may not have had that job anymore, but I was still had the talent and skill that made me awesome at it.

    I used the time off to increase my running and start lifting and found a lot of fulfillment in those goals. And I applied for jobs I never thought I'd get. And I did manage to get one. And it pays better and is closer to home than the last one. I don't have the group of inspiring people like my old job, and the work isn't as fulfilling, but I brought enough of my old job with me to inspire myself to keep going.

    This is profoundly inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing! I woke up today feeling a bit better. The person who posted above said I could have 48 hours of wallowing and I'm going to use all of them...and then I'm going to make a list of every random dream job I can think of. My industry is not perfect (witness the fact that I almost died due to the negligence in my line of work) and it's certainly not the only amazing job out there.

  • BarbellzNBrotein
    BarbellzNBrotein Posts: 306 Member
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    You need to talk to a counselor and maybe consider medication for depression.

    Bit dismissive. Pills aren't always the holy grail to ones new found happiness.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,952 Member
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    Lots of good advice already so I will just send you a hug from a penguin:

    28350483.jpg
  • VividVegan
    VividVegan Posts: 200 Member
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    Burn their building down (I would). Either that or rub everything with poison ivy (while wearing gloves). My last job let me go after having a seizure by the way. I had my fair share of revenge. They still have no idea I was behind it, lol. Feels good >:)
  • RoseTheWarrior
    RoseTheWarrior Posts: 2,035 Member
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    I feel for you. I really do. I lost a dream job too (my boss sold out his business). It hurt. My DH and I had to sell our house. Everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment. I let it hold me back for far too long though. I moved to another job, but I still felt so betrayed and angry that it was affecting my new job too. I finally decided to go for counseling, or I thought I actually might get fired. I saw a psychologist that was provided by the employee assistance program. After a few times going I also decided to see my doctor about anti-depressants. It was the BEST decision I ever made in my entire life. Everyone around me has noticed a huge change in my attitude. I'm always a work in progress, but I'm miles and miles from where I was.

    Please, don't let this affect you for too long. The past is gone. There's nothing you can do but put yourself in a better place going forward. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    "everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment"

    I'm so sorry -- that must have been so tremendously difficult for you. I am SO glad that counseling and anti-depressants worked for you. I have set up an appointment with my therapist. She helped me deal with PTSD and anxiety after my boat accident and I'm hoping that I can make some progress again.

    I sincerely hope that your therapist can help you work through your feelings. I wish you all the best. You've obviously got on the right track by talking about it and setting up the appointment, and the fact that you were helped by the therapy after your accident says a lot about your character and willingness to move on. Well done!
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,970 Member
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    Out of curiosity, what was the job? Wildland firefighter?
  • AngelinaB_
    AngelinaB_ Posts: 563 Member
    edited July 2016
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    I feel you... I had been recovering from injuries and dealing with chronic pain for the last two years... my work has suffered from it... and then when things got a bit nicer, that I felt finally the bad rut was coming to an end... I lost my mom unexpectedly... what can I say... the only thing I could do and I always have, is focus on the positive... and positive things have happened too we just don't see it sometimes... I see you are in love and happy... focus on that... you must get occupied (I tell this to myself not that I am great following my own advice I know it can be so hard, the smaller things everybody takes for granted)... with whatever... helping others if you don't find the mojo to do it for yourself, volunteer work, it will help you.... and then start pitching again so you will get another job... you will! I have no doubts you will.
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    You're now free to start your own business doing what you love.
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    Out of curiosity, what was the job? Wildland firefighter?

    I'm a producer for the Discovery Channel :)
  • b1229
    b1229 Posts: 57 Member
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    Sometimes things happen for a reason which you won't know right now, you might not have liked it or something better will come :)
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    FeedMeFish wrote: »
    Burn their building down (I would). Either that or rub everything with poison ivy (while wearing gloves). My last job let me go after having a seizure by the way. I had my fair share of revenge. They still have no idea I was behind it, lol. Feels good >:)

    I'm so sorry to hear that you were let go after a seizure! That's awful. Being Italian, I am a big believer in revenge ;) Something to contemplate...
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    I feel for you. I really do. I lost a dream job too (my boss sold out his business). It hurt. My DH and I had to sell our house. Everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment. I let it hold me back for far too long though. I moved to another job, but I still felt so betrayed and angry that it was affecting my new job too. I finally decided to go for counseling, or I thought I actually might get fired. I saw a psychologist that was provided by the employee assistance program. After a few times going I also decided to see my doctor about anti-depressants. It was the BEST decision I ever made in my entire life. Everyone around me has noticed a huge change in my attitude. I'm always a work in progress, but I'm miles and miles from where I was.

    Please, don't let this affect you for too long. The past is gone. There's nothing you can do but put yourself in a better place going forward. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    "everything I worked for seemed to crumble in one moment"

    I'm so sorry -- that must have been so tremendously difficult for you. I am SO glad that counseling and anti-depressants worked for you. I have set up an appointment with my therapist. She helped me deal with PTSD and anxiety after my boat accident and I'm hoping that I can make some progress again.

    I sincerely hope that your therapist can help you work through your feelings. I wish you all the best. You've obviously got on the right track by talking about it and setting up the appointment, and the fact that you were helped by the therapy after your accident says a lot about your character and willingness to move on. Well done!

    Thank you very much. I'm looking forward to going back to her and dumping the whole messy mess in her lap.
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    AngelinaB_ wrote: »
    I feel you... I had been recovering from injuries and dealing with chronic pain for the last two years... my work has suffered from it... and then when things got a bit nicer, that I felt finally the bad rut was coming to an end... I lost my mom unexpectedly... what can I say... the only thing I could do and I always have, is focus on the positive... and positive things have happened too we just don't see it sometimes... I see you are in love and happy... focus on that... you must get occupied (I tell this to myself not that I am great following my own advice I know it can be so hard, the smaller things everybody takes for granted)... with whatever... helping others if you don't find the mojo to do it for yourself, volunteer work, it will help you.... and then start pitching again so you will get another job... you will! I have no doubts you will.

    I'm sorry for what you have been through as well. Looking outward and helping others is indeed a great way to move past your own problems. Thank you for the reminder.
  • wanderinglight
    wanderinglight Posts: 1,519 Member
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    You're now free to start your own business doing what you love.

    Terrifying and amazing response. Thank you!