I miss the happy feeling

CatFan1019

Struggling a bit. I've used food as a coping mechanism for so long that now I feel there is a hole in my life. Like something is missing. I haven't cut out any foods. Just doing smaller portions. But I miss that comforted happy feeling. I'm not unhappy though. Anybody else felt this way? Or a similar way? Suggestions on what to do?

kshama2001

I used to be an emotional eater but now I use exercise to manage stress.

Francl27

Find something else. For me, it's walking (that's why I hate Summer though). Read a good book, start a new series on Netflix... The bottom line (for me at least) is that now that I know better and actually care about my weight, there's no happy feeling anymore when I overeat anyway... just guilt (unless it was actually planned, then I definitely enjoy it).

emdeesea

I use exercise as my coping strategy. When I've had a particularly bad day, I either get to the gym or put on my sneakers and go outside and sweat it out. Never fails to clear my head.

VintageFeline

Another one who now uses exercise as their coping mechanism for the most part. If I really really want to splurge eat then I have to bank those calories for it/ I fI want to eat it I have to earn it and mostly, it's just not worth it any more.

It is a learning process though, that switch didn't flip overnight, it's just like a muscle you have to exercise.

st476

I know what you mean, but stop thinking of it that way or you'll probably go back to eating the wrong way. Don't convince yourself that you miss eating as much as you want of whatever you want, because I'm sure it was never as great as you're telling yourself it was. Instead, think of why you want to lose weight in the first place. Do you like the feeling of being unhappy with the way you look/feel? Are you going to miss that? You may be giving up something that made you feel good before, but you're giving it up for something that'll make you feel even better (for way longer than any food ever would).

Iamnotasenior

I used to use food to cope with stress, loneliness, boredom, frustration, you name it, I "medicated it" with food. Then I discovered endorphins! If you regularly work out and stick with it for about 30 days, you will start to find that same great feeling after a workout. When you can't workout, you can get that same comforting feeling by just doing something nice for yourself, aka, get a massage, go to the beauty parlor and get a shampoo and style, get a manicure or pedicure, take a hot bath while listening to your favorite music and lighting a scented candle, you get the idea. Start looking at food is meant as fuel for our bodies, not a way to soothe our emotions and when you get the urge to cope by eating, find something else to replace the food.

hollygirl101

I've found that I'm more likely to snarl at people now, like my patience has diminished. I won't attribute it to being hangry (angry because I'm hungry) because I am eating enough, just not in the ways or amounts I was previously. I'm also drinking a lot less, which in retrospect I think mellowed me out (even when I wasn't drinking) more than I thought. Since I've noticed it I'm doing my best to keep it under control, but this behavior surprised me! As peeps above have said, try going for a walk or something when you start to feel "the urge". I came home from work all crabby the other day and where I usually would have reached right for the wine opener instead I changed my clothes quick and went to the gym before I could talk myself out of it. I only worked out for a half hour but felt so much better afterward!

SueInAz

I agree, you need to find something other than food to make you feel "good". Food is fuel for your body not a teddy bear or security blanket. If you haven't yet, start to exercise. As others have stated the endorphin rush is a good replacement for that feeling you're after especially when you've just lifted a weight you previously couldn't or run a tenth of mile further than you could last week.

If exercise isn't your thing pick up a hobby that keeps your hands busy. Color, draw, knit, cross stitch, or paint. There's a great amount of joy to be found in creating something useful or pretty.

puffbrat

I completely understand. Sometimes I cave and eat the really high calorie take out foods I used to eat just to get that happy feeling. But I've noticed that every time I do that, I actually don't feel good afterward. My stomach will hurt, I won't feel satisfied, and I'll be annoyed at myself for ruining my calories for the day. Every time it happens, the temptation for those indulgences lessens. They are still there, but not nearly as much, and I'm finding more pleasure in other lower calorie foods.

Getting back into really loving to read for fun is also helping fill that need.

fr33sia12

I get that happy feeling now from knowing I'm losing weight and eating healthy and all the good things I'm doing for my body. It also lasts a lot longer too. When I'd eat junk food and feel comforted and happy it only lasted as long as I was eating it, but now I feel a lot happier most of the time that's why I've changed my lifestyle and eating habits for good.

cwolfman13

Fill it with fitness...

AnnPT77

I'll add another +1 to the idea that exercise is a good substitute, even something mild like stretching.

But other forms of self-soothing can be good, too - warm bubble-bath, breathing/relaxation techniques, doing a chore or hobby that gives you a sense of completion or accomplishment, listening to music you find cheering, getting some fresh air or sunshine, take some "me time" for an indulgent non-food activity you wouldn't usually let yourself take time for . . . .

In the long run, for me personally - don't know about others - the weight loss has come with an increased literal physical sense of well-being. I don't know what this is from (less inflammation? better circulation? better nutrition? heck if I know!).

ogtmama

I had to remind myself that it didn't really make me happy, it's a false memory. It made me sad, embarrassed, sleepy, bloated, ashamed. I feel legitimately happy now when I wake up with more energy to spend with my kids and I like what I see in the mirror (though there's still 20 to go).

JeromeBarry1

There's a big hole in my life but I already know that shoving food into it doesn't help.

Rachel0778

I absolutely relate. I used food for comfort and as a way to numb my emotions. I had to find other things to fill that void when I took away over-eating/bingeing. I have since filled it with exercise like other people have cited. I also find a hot mug of tea with stevia and cashew milk while curled up in cozy PJs on the couch does wonders for helping to fill the void that overeating used to.

walkdmc

I can relate very much. Aside from finding a different, non-food, activity to make you happy, you may have to accept a neutral mood. It's okay to not be happy all the time.

I've definitely experienced a change in my personality since I stopped overeating. I'm quieter, more reserved and observant of others. It's been a good change because although I get to know fewer people, I get to know them better. I feel a depth to my life and interactions with others that I didn't have when I used food as a crutch.

szkodzt

I can relate as well, and echo the other folks who said it didn't really make me happy - because I always felt guilty afterwards. I think it was the idea of the meal (tonight I am letting myself have as much of x and I don't care) that made me happy.

Now that I am in a better place with how I view food (no more "last meals" - I am going to stuff my face but start my diet tomorrow, this is the LAST time I get to eat this, so I will make it good!) I actually get happy at the thought that the food no longer controls me - I control it. That has made me feel very powerful and happy.

aftnrid88

What I'm about to say may be a little crazy, but hear me out. I agree with what other people said about the food-happiness being a false memory, but I think it can sometimes be more than that. Eating can make us happy, but we also can attach a lot of emotions to our eating experience that give us a sense of routine, love, or control. Maybe in dealing with the stress of the day it's one way we can "treat" ourselves, but it's also a way that we can cause our own negative feelings (guilt, embarrassment, regret) and be in control of that aspect too. I think that's true for me. We develop habits around food and we can break those habits by forming stronger/more reinforcing behaviors around something else. A lot of people are saying exercise, and it took me a long time to exercise, but it's a really great option! Be creative and do a lot of different things. Set goals that don't have to do with food. It IS a really big shift for your brain to take on, but the best way to find a replacement for the food-happiness is to look for one best of luck!

cross2bear

That happy feeling you get from comfort foodis a lie - its like thinking the world is great while high as a kite! Because its fleeting, temporary, short-lived; and when reality rears its ugly head again, depression, guilt, shame and self remorse come charging in. Get happy in a real way - accomplishments, relationships - and not from a bag of Oreos (sorry Oreo lovers!)