I Messed Up... Again...Need Help
BreakinChains
Posts: 18 Member
A week ago I decided to buckle down and get healthy. I even swore off processed sugars. Despite the HORRIBLE cravings, I was doing pretty good. Until life happened and things got nasty. I didn't go on a binge, but I did indulge and put myself over my calories. I realize now that I eat to deal with my problems. I'm an emotional eater. I don't want to be. I need to find a better way to deal with food when things get tough. Any suggestions?
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Replies
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It's ok. We all mess up. One slip doesn't sink the whole ship though!
In addiction recovery, they speak of harm-reduction (instead of going "cold-turkey") and also substituting unhealthy behaviors with healthy alternatives. Formulate a strategy now, so that next time you have a craving, you have that activity to distract yourself with and imprint upon your brain as the new habit
Hope that helps! 6 -
I used to be like that and I found a good combination of talking yourself you don't need that realising your eating cause your emotions finding something else to do and an accountability partner are very helpful1
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Do you have a medical condition that processed sugar affects? Otherwise, you are setting yourself up for a hard road ahead. Most of us will say that moderation is key. Do you plan to never eat a cookie or piece of cake again in your life? If you do, I suggest taking a moderation approach to weight loss. Cutting things out entirely lead to binges, and I hate to say it, but weight loss is the easy part. Maintenance can be much harder, which is why people fall back into old habits - they never learned moderation.
It's okay to have sugar. Just save some of your daily calories to allow for a treat, if that's what you enjoy. But you are already discovering that this will not be sustainable for you in long term.
In response to emotional eating, I think we all do it to a certain extent. The key is staying busy and keep your hands moving. I've actually heard great things about this and adult coloring books lately. Might be something to try when you're feeling stressed.4 -
This is a very normal and common experience, particularly when you are trying to completely cut out something specific. All you can do is take some notes, look over the last few days to see if anything added to your situation. Get back on track and realize that this will happen, so forgive yourself. A rough day, doesn't mean you throw the whole thing out, but do keep an open mind to alternative possibilities.4
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Don't be so hard on urself, we all go thru these moments. Tomorrow is another day just leave behind what happened and move on.3
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In the beginning, focus less on ELIMINATING things from your dietary options (well-documented fact that strict restrictions lead to rebellion, ie indulging) , and more on ADDING IN HEALTHY THINGS.
Eat anything you want:- Cake? Dump some hemp seeds on it!
- Big Mac? Dump some chia seeds on it!!
- Pasta? DUMP SOME FLAX SEEDS ON IT!!
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Find another way to deal with your emotions.
Stressed go for a walk, have a soak in the bath
Angry do a boxing class
Sad call a friend to talk it out
Lonely call a friend or family member, volunteer somewhere
etc etc6 -
willburton174 wrote: »In the beginning, focus less on ELIMINATING things from your dietary options (well-documented fact that strict restrictions lead to rebellion, ie indulging) , and more on ADDING IN HEALTHY THINGS.
Eat anything you want:- Cake? Dump some hemp seeds on it!
- Big Mac? Dump some chia seeds on it!!
- Pasta? DUMP SOME FLAX SEEDS ON IT!!
OP is attempting to lose weight. Adding more food is not an likely to help with this.
Although - to be fair and balanced this...willburton174 wrote: »It's ok. We all mess up. One slip doesn't sink the whole ship though!
In addiction recovery, they speak of harm-reduction (instead of going "cold-turkey") and also substituting unhealthy behaviors with healthy alternatives. Formulate a strategy now, so that next time you have a craving, you have that activity to distract yourself with and imprint upon your brain as the new habit Hope that helps!
IMHO is great advice.4 -
vespiquenn wrote: »Do you have a medical condition that processed sugar affects? Otherwise, you are setting yourself up for a hard road ahead. Most of us will say that moderation is key. Do you plan to never eat a cookie or piece of cake again in your life? If you do, I suggest taking a moderation approach to weight loss. Cutting things out entirely lead to binges, and I hate to say it, but weight loss is the easy part. Maintenance can be much harder, which is why people fall back into old habits - they never learned moderation.
It's okay to have sugar. Just save some of your daily calories to allow for a treat, if that's what you enjoy. But you are already discovering that this will not be sustainable for you in long term.
In response to emotional eating, I think we all do it to a certain extent. The key is staying busy and keep your hands moving. I've actually heard great things about this and adult coloring books lately. Might be something to try when you're feeling stressed.
I appreciate your advice and expected someone would say this. For me, moderation does not work. If I eat one cookie, I'm going back for 10 more. Right now eating foods high in processed sugar (cookies, cake, ice cream, etc) send me into massive cravings. To eliminate those cravings, I need to eliminate the things that cause them.
If I have to be one of those people who never eats another cookie or slice of cake again, so be it. Right now I'd rather be healthy than have those things. My hope is to eventually be able to eat in moderation, but that may not be possible for me.0 -
tiggerlove wrote: »Don't be so hard on urself, we all go thru these moments. Tomorrow is another day just leave behind what happened and move on.
I really need to learn this lesson! Thank you. Going to keep on trucking today. I can do this!1 -
willburton174 wrote: »In the beginning, focus less on ELIMINATING things from your dietary options (well-documented fact that strict restrictions lead to rebellion, ie indulging) , and more on ADDING IN HEALTHY THINGS.
Eat anything you want:- Cake? Dump some hemp seeds on it!
- Big Mac? Dump some chia seeds on it!!
- Pasta? DUMP SOME FLAX SEEDS ON IT!!
No. Just no. I'm currently substituting my usual sugary snacks for fruits. I'm not eating a cake, putting seeds on it and calling it "healthy".4 -
nutmegoreo wrote: »This is a very normal and common experience, particularly when you are trying to completely cut out something specific. All you can do is take some notes, look over the last few days to see if anything added to your situation. Get back on track and realize that this will happen, so forgive yourself. A rough day, doesn't mean you throw the whole thing out, but do keep an open mind to alternative possibilities.
Thank you so much. I needed this today.0 -
willburton174 wrote: »In the beginning, focus less on ELIMINATING things from your dietary options (well-documented fact that strict restrictions lead to rebellion, ie indulging) , and more on ADDING IN HEALTHY THINGS.
Eat anything you want:- Cake? Dump some hemp seeds on it!
- Big Mac? Dump some chia seeds on it!!
- Pasta? DUMP SOME FLAX SEEDS ON IT!!
:huh: :noway: :laugh:4 -
You could do this. You want something sweet... Go buy just 1 donut. Or just 1 cupcake. May cost a bit more but you won't have the extras in the house. My favorite go to is fruit with 2 Tbs cool whip. Cool whip only has 25 calories for the 2 Tbs. just about everyone can find 25 calories extra. Strawberries have hardly any calories. I think 4 calories for a medium strawberry.
If you want to lose weight , get rid of the guilt. Guilt will lead to big set backs. I know it's easier said than done. But I'm telling you from experience guilt has got to go. So what if you had a bad day, doesn't mean to make your week bad. It was a day out of 7 make the best out of the other 6. Write down what you ate, why you ate it. Then write down how you felt before and after you ate it. Then write down preventions. Exercise relieves stress in a healthy manner. Remember you achieve goals by one step at a time. You are in no competition. You have the right to have a bad day. You also have the right to get back up and dust yourself off. So chin up and make tomorrow a better day. You can do this. You can!4 -
People, cmon now. Of course Im not condoning eating without moderation and just using seeds to justify poor eating habits. Of course adding something healthy doesnt nullify the negative effects of the awful gunk in crappy food! Im proposing a thing called a GRADUAL transition. Everyone knows how hard it can be to demand yourself to transform everything about your lifestyle overnight. For some people that works, sure, but for others it's a great way to sabotage yourself. You dont master something by beating yourseld for not having mastered it yet.
Instead of demanding that your eating be instantly perfect, make small adjustments daily, and over time, your old habits (and those extra pounds) will disappear.
Or not... Up to you1 -
After you go over your calories and you're feeling badly about it, really think it through. The next time you want to make a poor choice, try to put your mind back in that space. Really, really think as if you already made the choice that you want to avoid. For me, usually I can begin to see a little more clearly the reasons why I want the less calorie dense food, and sometimes (not always), I can reverse it and choose something else. It's not about stopping forever. That rarely works, and often backfires. But increasing your awareness will help. Also, make a plan about what you're going to do when you're tempted to pick up something you know won't help you reach your goals. Having a plan is easy, but most people skip this step.
Good luck. You can do this!!2 -
willburton174 wrote: »People, cmon now. Of course Im not condoning eating without moderation and just using seeds to justify poor eating habits. Of course adding something healthy doesnt nullify the negative effects of the awful gunk in crappy food! Im proposing a thing called a GRADUAL transition. Everyone knows how hard it can be to demand yourself to transform everything about your lifestyle overnight. For some people that works, sure, but for others it's a great way to sabotage yourself. You dont master something by beating yourseld for not having mastered it yet.
Instead of demanding that your eating be instantly perfect, make small adjustments daily, and over time, your old habits (and those extra pounds) will disappear.
Or not... Up to you
So are you saying that, over time, I would crave a pile of chia seeds instead of a cheeseburger?
Hint: Ain't gonna happen in my lifetime.
And I lost 75 lbs in a year simply by eating less and moving more. I never cut out one single food that I love because, for me, that would've lead to wanting it even more. If I want a cheeseburger, I have a cheeseburger. I just don't do it every night *and* I make it fit into my calorie allotment for the day through eating less the rest of the day, doing more exercise, or a combination of both. This is what I have found to be successful for me in the long term. 1 -
No one's perfect all the time, myself included. People who swear off entire food groups can be prone to binging. Unless there's a medical reason you can't have sugar, there's nothing wrong with including it in your daily diet, especially if it makes your plan sustainable for the long haul.1
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snickerscharlie wrote: »willburton174 wrote: »People, cmon now. Of course Im not condoning eating without moderation and just using seeds to justify poor eating habits. Of course adding something healthy doesnt nullify the negative effects of the awful gunk in crappy food! Im proposing a thing called a GRADUAL transition. Everyone knows how hard it can be to demand yourself to transform everything about your lifestyle overnight. For some people that works, sure, but for others it's a great way to sabotage yourself. You dont master something by beating yourseld for not having mastered it yet.
Instead of demanding that your eating be instantly perfect, make small adjustments daily, and over time, your old habits (and those extra pounds) will disappear.
Or not... Up to you
So are you saying that, over time, I would crave a pile of chia seeds instead of a cheeseburger?
Hint: Ain't gonna happen in my lifetime.
And I lost 75 lbs in a year simply by eating less and moving more. I never cut out one single food that I love because, for me, that would've lead to wanting it even more. If I want a cheeseburger, I have a cheeseburger. I just don't do it every night *and* I make it fit into my calorie allotment for the day through eating less the rest of the day, doing more exercise, or a combination of both. This is what I have found to be successful for me in the long term.
Haha ya maybe not crave da chia, but at least crave the gunk less.
Dude, it sounds like you already know what your Win Conditions are! Defs give yourself mad credit for your successes!0 -
hypodonthaveme wrote: »You could do this. You want something sweet... Go buy just 1 donut. Or just 1 cupcake. May cost a bit more but you won't have the extras in the house. My favorite go to is fruit with 2 Tbs cool whip. Cool whip only has 25 calories for the 2 Tbs. just about everyone can find 25 calories extra. Strawberries have hardly any calories. I think 4 calories for a medium strawberry.
If you want to lose weight , get rid of the guilt. Guilt will lead to big set backs. I know it's easier said than done. But I'm telling you from experience guilt has got to go. So what if you had a bad day, doesn't mean to make your week bad. It was a day out of 7 make the best out of the other 6. Write down what you ate, why you ate it. Then write down how you felt before and after you ate it. Then write down preventions. Exercise relieves stress in a healthy manner. Remember you achieve goals by one step at a time. You are in no competition. You have the right to have a bad day. You also have the right to get back up and dust yourself off. So chin up and make tomorrow a better day. You can do this. You can!
This exactly. Writing down what you ate and why can help you uncover if there is a pattern. Writing down preventions will help as well. The guilt is what usually gets us. I even have that problem sometimes. You just have to remember that everyone has these days.0 -
I know I am adding my voice to a cacophony of suggestions, but this is what my phys. assistant told me to try: every time you eat something, look to how you're feeling in the moment, and write down that emotional state. Even if you are genuinely hungry for actual nourishment, check in with your emotions.
I understand the desire to completely cut out the processed sugars, apart from the emotional eating, that is. What helped me back off from the cookies, doughnuts, etc, is my fitness role model: my favorite singer, Ramin Karimloo (known best as the Phantom of the Opera). When I want a cookie, I stop and think: "hey, is this something that he would eat and still remain fit?" If the answer is "oh, hell no!" then the response is simple: stay the heck away from it. Because of this, I've managed to cut a LOT of unnecessary stuff out of my diet. My efforts are not completely perfect yet, but I'm getting there, and that's what counts.
Add me as a friend if you wish.
Blessings,
Kat ^.^1 -
BreakinChains wrote: »A week ago I decided to buckle down and get healthy. I even swore off processed sugars. Despite the HORRIBLE cravings, I was doing pretty good. Until life happened and things got nasty. I didn't go on a binge, but I did indulge and put myself over my calories. I realize now that I eat to deal with my problems. I'm an emotional eater. I don't want to be. I need to find a better way to deal with food when things get tough. Any suggestions?
I used to have horrible hunger and cutting way back on refined sugar fixed that for me, BUT that was after three years of working out pretty hard and getting into shape. Maybe you pushed it too hard too fast. I believe cutting refined sugars is a good thing, but you don't necessary have to go cold turkey. Fix one thing, then when you are comfortable fix another and so on. Maybe there is a sweetened drink you can remove first, then something else. Maybe it is something else causing the problems. Changing a lot of things at the same time can lead to confusion. Of coarse you know how you feel so you are your own best judge.
My approach might be too slow for you, but it is just what I do. Try something and if it works use and move onto something else.
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I can relate and I clean instead. Lol I know it sounds like torture but it gets my mind off things, gets me moving (instead of eating), and I feel accomplished afterwards. A taste of instant gratification in this long journey. Good luck- you CAN do this!0
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I think most of us have found ourselves in similar positions. The key to beating the "over-indulging" and "emotional-eating" is taking a step back and recognizing that you have the ability to stop eating when you should be done. If the urge or desire to overeat or eat some unhealthy foods is extremely strong, I would recommend getting out of the environment you are in. Go out, drive to a friend's, take a shower or bath, go to the gym, for a walk... Do something you enjoy and that will make you feel better. Look for other solutions to make you feel better. Make a list of the things that cheer you up (leave out anything to do with food!) and turn to that list when you are upset or frustrated. Hope this helps, and best of luck. You can do this
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We all sometimes either overeat to much of the right things, give in to unhealthy choices, or just blow it sometimes. The secret is ( and it took me many years of dieting, losing, gaining it back to get this into my thick head) that THERE IS NO SECRET...We need to put our less successful moments behind us, drop the guilt, get right back on your plan, and look forward and not backwards. Don't waste any more time on something you've done that you can't change. Just do the next right thing. We are all given a new day every morning to start again. Good luck.1
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After going on a 6 mile walk, generally only once a week I'm ravenous by the time I walk in the door. I've usually planned my lunch which I gobble down then I start raiding the cupboards. I mostly end up about 300 - 400 calories over for the day but I'm still full at tea time so I skip it. I've tried not buying certain foods but once im in the zone anything is fair game, even the custard powder has been a target. Naturally I regret it afterwards but it happens and I know it's not just me. However I always have to eat chocolate Penguins in two's to keep each other company in my tummy LOL. X0
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