Confidence crash from complaint at pool.

playmadcats

I have a weekly swim lesson and this week pool was busy so were three of us in lane and three in next lane. Was passing girl in my lane same time as guy in next lane was passing someone and caught him with my foot. ( we were both very close to rope).
I apologised at the wall, and thought that would be the end of. However he then proceeded to complain I had deliberately kicked him 6 times. Then told her to order me to swim up and down middle of lane ( not possible when sharing with others).
Problem is it upset her quite a bit and has also left me worried to go back in pool in case he's there again. Sometimes I only visit gym for swim. Plus my lesson is at fixed time so can't avoid going in then.
Any tips. I know it's in my head and I just have to get back in. But this has really shaken me.

NaturalNancy

Accidents happen!
You apologized and it is done.
If they're still upset, that's their problem.
Everyone makes mistakes!
Go back to that pool and do what you need to do!
Smile real big if you see them again and do not apologize, you did that already!
I hope you will still enjoy swimming.

cmarangi

He needs to get over it. Do what you do and ignore him.

playmadcats

Thank you.
It's something that does happen occasionally. I've been on other end. As far as I'm concerned it happens an apology is nice but I wouldn't expect one.
Will have quick swim tonight. I skipped last night and don't want to be avoiding pool due to one incident.
Just a shame he has such an attitude. I mean whole reason I'm taking lessons is to improve.

jemhh

You apologized and I'm assuming you did not actually deliberately kick him 6 times, if you even kicked him that many times. You've fulfilled your requirements as a civilized human being and now he needs to move on. Don't let this get you down.

Is the "she" your swim teacher or just one of the others from your lane? Is it a private or group class?

playmadcats

I did kick him once accidentally , certainly not 6 times or deliberately. Just hope swim teacher us okay too as it upset her.
There were two other swimmers in lane not having lessons. I was having private lesson with my swim teacher. Sometimes we use lanes if free sometimes main part of pool. This week she wanted to use the lane. Sadly as an adult we don't get priority though most people are considerate.

RainaProske

Why do we all give so much power to strangers, especially lying, rude strangers?

Therealobi1

you are a learner swimmer, the guy needs to get over it. The swimming instructor needs to sort it out so collisions are minimized. Keep having your lessons, people bump all the time. The guy needs to buy his own pool if he cant accept the contact.

smotheredincheese

Some people just love to create a bit of drama don't they? I dont see how it would even be possible to kick someone six times as you swim past, who can move their legs that quickly or forcefully underwater??
Don't let it get to you. By the time you see hjm again the chances are he'll have forgotten all about you and moved on to some other drama like a malicious splashing incident or someone else sitting in his preferred spot in the changing room.

vikinglander

cmarangi wrote: »

He needs to get over it. Do what you do and ignore him.

THIS!!!

Sued0nim

If you see him again say

As I've previously apologised for the accidental foot meeting I won't do so again but I strongly suggest you swim in the middle of your lane as you are clearly more experienced and more bothered than me

playmadcats

Thanks all. I know I'm being silly letting it get to me. Luckily most members there are either really nice or keep to themselves. Just don't want to give up and he's made me feel as if I'm so bad I shouldn't be there at all. Which is daft as at best he's grossly over exaggerated I'd not lied about incident.

shor0814

As a swimmer I can say that when swelling laps bumps happen. Why wasn't he in the middle of his lane. Screw him and swim.

lorrpb

What did your instructor say?

playmadcats

He wasn't in middle due to sharing his lane too. Possibly may not have happened if we both weren't passing others at same time.
Instructor pointed out that swimming laps was norm and I was correct to swim round as sharing a lane but he wasn't having it. Instructor is quite shy too so don't think she wanted to make things worse.

Anyway went to pool tonight. Main pool crowded again but small pool only had couple in. At least I've made it back. Will try tomorrow and hopefully main pool will be bit quieter.

mreichard

You are not responsible for what's in someone else's head. If he mentions it again, you can say as pp suggested "I've already apologized. If you still have an issue you should take it up with management or find an empty pool. If you continue to harass me about this I will definitely complain because you are making me feel uncomfortable."

dragon_girl26

mreichard wrote: »

You are not responsible for what's in someone else's head. If he mentions it again, you can say as pp suggested "I've already apologized. If you still have an issue you should take it up with management or find an empty pool. If you continue to harass me about this I will definitely complain because you are making me feel uncomfortable."

^^ This. Some people just like to cause problems and it's too bad, because now it's making you a little gun shy. Sometimes with people who are aggressive like that, it helps to show assertiveness back at them. You apologized for your mistake; that doesn't give him the right to continue to give you crap for it.
If he's like that, then I strongly suspect you aren't the only one he's caused issues with.

Qskim

He might have more of an issue with the instructer than you seeing as she's there more regularly with lessons. Just upsetting you to prove some point to her or the club. Maybe he had an issue with his membership perhaps so everyone who is associated with the admin and downwards cops it.

if the instructer is following the guidelines of the centre then it's no prob. Just ignore the grumpy bugger.