Me learning about me

mish3131

So, this is my latest blog. How many people have and are going through this? I feel pretty alone, but I don't think that is true.

I am not sure if I have said this previously, but I am finding two things this time around.

1. I do not like talking or letting people know I am watching what I eat. I think the pressure is too much and the judgemental looks while I eat overwhelm me.
2. Food, it is constantly on my mind even if I am full. My mind says, ooh let's have a snack or I need to pick on something. Or let's plan on our food.
This is super stressful for me. I am full from having cereal and coiffee, but I have this urge to want to eat even though I am full.
What is that? Why? How do I stop this? Am I always going to struggle?
The only two people aware of the differences are my MIL and hubby. No one at work, or friends. I don't want the pressue. Handling my mind constantly thinking about food is exhausting on its own.
Now the questions for me is how do I get my mind thinking about food so much under control? I know to a point I need to plan my meals and snack, but there is no reason for me to CONSTANTLY thinking about eating when full

kristen6350

I lost 50lbs in 2011. So for the past 5 years I've been in "maintainance". Some years I was REALLY good. Some years I got "comfortable". So comfortable I let myself gain 10-20lbs back. But I always get back on the horse and lost it.

Any way...Even after 5 years all I think of is food. I think of what I'll eat next when I'm eating what I'm eating now. My friends say "hey, let's meet at "so and so"...so I get on the website and figure out what I can eat and drink without blowing my calories out of the water.

I learned there are certian things I'll never be able to do and still maintain my weight. Eating out of a full bag of chips, ice cream container, Chips and Salsa at Mexican Restaurants, I can't eat any of the free food provided by work. Baking, even though I once loved it, is torchure now.

Food will always be important to me. It's never going to be easy.

I know this doesn't help you, but maybe knowing you aren't alone will help.