I NEED HELP!!

JacquelineW1991

Hi my name Is Jacqueline i'm 22 from Scotland I weigh 335lbs i'm 5 foot 7 inches tall and I am miserable. I have tried so many diets before and have gotten no where because I can't say no to food I consumed 4523 calories today and I am utterly ashamed of it. So I have decided my new life starts right now and I would love to make some new friends on here to help me through. When I was 7 my uncle who was my best friend passed away and since then I have been comfort eating and I was also bullied really badly in school which made me eat more and then my parents split up and my dad got cancer (he survived) so I ended up eating more and more and I have recently been diagnosed with epilepsy which is making me scared and miserable. My 12 year old sister looks up to me but what kind of a role model am I if I am this big at the rate i'm going I wont live to see her 18th birthday. Please help me with support and motivation thank you.

howardheilweil

I can't begin to understand the issues that you are dealing with. All I will say is that you have a lot to live for and you are taking a important first step. I also suggest that given your medical issues, you may want to ask your doctor for a referral to a registered dietician. This will be a long road, but you can do it.

JacquelineW1991

The main problem is that i'm from a small island community and there is no registered dietitian but I do have an appointment with my doctor tomorrow to discuss the matter. I am hoping that with the support of family and friends and the people on here that I will reach my goals.

Internistella

Hang in there! You have already taken a big step in admitting that you need to change and that you want to do this for yourself. Welcome to MFP, you will find lots of great resources here. I hope your visit to the doctor is helpful!

cmriverside

95% of this is psychological. Once you accept that you only need XXXX amount of food per day, everything else above that is done for psychological reasons. You are very wise to have recognized this in yourself.

There are a lot of good books about emotional eating, why not read a few of them?

I wish you much success. Save your life, woman. You're the only one who can.



If hunger isn't the problem, food isn't the solution.

JacquelineW1991

Thank you.

DarcieC2389

I would try going in baby steps. Try eating more fruits and vegetables and healthy foods. Seeing a regular doctor is definitely a good idea. You might want to concentrate on your eating habits first and then when you are more accustomed to eating less, try a non strenuous form of exercise such as walking or swimming. Good luck!

missmegan831

I can understand your pain and the use of food for comfort as I too have ate outta comfort on and off the last 15 yrs of my life. Please feel free to friend request me I am here daily and very supportive friend.

Dainty59

Fell to add me

prettykitty1012

Girl as long as you are making this change for you, then nothing and no one can stop you. Set a goal for yourself and make it work!! I have been struggling for years but now is my time too! Together, let's kick weight loss in the face! What do you think? Keep in mind change does not happen over night. It is easy to get discouraged but if you find an outlet that works for you (other than eating of course) you will succeed! I tend to eat when I'm emotional too but I found that I really like kick boxing and shopping. Rewarding yourself and celebrating the little things is a great way to stay motivated too! Stay strong girl! Great things will happen for you.

rose_mortem

Serving size is a problem for me... I'll eat the whole package of macaroni, ice cream, chips, or whatever I'm eating. Try eating one serving instead of 2. Also, you can easily replace snacks with fruits, vegetables, or whole grain crackers. Low fat dairy is also helpful.

Good luck, and congratulations on starting :flowerforyou:

I cannot understand everything you've been through, but I can support your quest for better health! I sent a friend request.

wugegoodwin

I agree. Start with the psychology part to identify why you reach for food and be kind to yourself. Focus on the good - the days you did meet your goals and not the negative. And set simple moderate goals - eating more fruits and vegtables and complex cards and walking 30 minutes? Slowly when you focus on the positive, more positive will happen. Set goals on what to do, not what not do do. Example: go for a walk when I reach to eat but don't feel hungry. Drink a glass of water with every meal. Sit down to eat with no distractsion. See what I mean. Not Don't eat frenchfries, don't watch 3 hours of TV...

Myweightlossdiary

I am in a very similar boat as you and can empathize with what you are saying. I lost my brother in 2005 and have been on an emotional eating roller coaster ride ever since. I didn't realize it until recently that I've been comfort eating and it mostly happens when I get depressed or nervous about something. I too am looking for friends to provide motivational support with. Feel free to add me and maybe we can help support each other?

Recently, I decided to try to conscientiously think before just shoving food in my mouth, but it's hard at times because it's out of habit. I don't even realize how much I've eaten until later I try to get some of whatever I was eating only to find out there were just crumbs in the bag. That's when the horrible feeling sinks in and sometimes I try and justify it to myself saying things like "well it could have been worse if you had eaten X, Y, or Z". I agree that most of weight loss is psychological, but I find battling with your own mindset is quite possibly, the hardest thing to do! I am a very stubborn person!!

Good luck in your journey. This has been a great support group for me and I know it will be for you as well. If you have a smartphone or tablet, I would definitely suggest downloading this app to that device because when I have to constantly see it, I'm reminded to get moving.

Christinebell65

Welcome! Feel free to "friend" me.

maab12

I feel for you I am in the same boat as you and its very frustrating feel free to add me I would love the support

deb3129

I am 5' 7'' also, and I started at 338 pounds. So I can honestly say I have been there! I also was miserable, and I thought I would just always be like that. But then one day I decided enough was enough, and that I had to make some serious changes. I was 41 years old, and I knew if I continued on the path I was on, that chances were I would end up with serious health issues. I have 4 kids and a lot to live for, so I decided I had to get healthy.

That was in March 2012, and so far I have lost 121 pounds. I feel so much better, it has been so worth it. When you have a lot to lose, and you are just starting out it can seem really overwhelming, But the pounds lost add up quicker than you would think. Just keep the resolve that you have right now, and you can get there. It is not an easy journey, and slips will be made. But you can do it!

BobOki

I will be happy to friend you, I provide motivation and answer questions as best I can. I do not, however, give pitty and tend to provide tough love, so I can be your best friend, but if you start making bad excuses or the like expect me to kick your butt and tell you what you need to hear.

Anyone can feel free to join me up, I will be starting back lifting today, and getting back on track from the CRAZY last month, which I will now call my break month ;P I think I gained 2 lbs... ouch.

drkrx

Congratulations on making the decision to make a change. Remember to start withs smaller goals like log my food every day. then add another goal like eat one apple a day and just keep building. before you know it the weight will be gone. And don't beat yourself up if you have an off day. It is OK.

PoisonedCursed

You're not alone, and I can feel your pain and frustration. By deciding that you're going to change, hey that's one hell of a big step you took today, I'm here with you all the way, and I've already added you as friend. Feel free to talk to me anytime you want. I believe you can be the person you set out to be, and you would be an excellent role model to your sister. I'm sure you'll make her so proud of you,

billsica

Hey, Congrats on taking that first step to being awesome.

Here is a hint. Don't diet, diets are stupid and most (95%) of people just fail at them.

Pretty much just change your entire life, well forever. Life-style changes are going to be a better way to go. start counting calories, Figure out your BMR, TDEE, Macros, etc. Should take you about a week or so to figure this out, but you will be fine.

Figure out some sort of exercise to do as well. I enjoy running (c25k) and lifting, if you have gym access.

dmspenc

Welcome to mfp. Feel free to add me as a friend.

MyLif3B3Lik3

Hello i cant say i understand where your coming from personally but i will say i would like to be your friend and be there with you along the way in your journey to change, every day will not be a good day that's the 1st thing you must accept and you have to want it more than the excuses you are going to make for your self (i struggle with this myself) but you can over come anything you set your mind to, looking forward to getting to know you....


XOXO

_HeartsOnFire_

The most important thing is that you have made a decision to do it. Now say this to yourself often --- You CAN do this!!! Sounds easy, but it's taken practice for me. You also have to turn off any negative self talk that you have, which is super hard! I had to practice at this. I will NOT get mad at myself if I go over one day or don't work out that night. I will not feel guilty either. I listen to my body and what it needs.

Like you I am an emotional eater/drinker. I lost my dad when I was 9 in a car accident and I was the only one in the car with him. I have had major survivors guilt most of my life, until the last year. I started taking care of myself, eating better, working out, and then sought counseling. I've come so far I'm sometimes in shock at how well I'm doing. Last night I said good bye to my niece, nephew and sister in law (said goodbye to my brother - aka my bff - last week), it was incredibly hard especially when my niece clung to me and repeated over and over "don't go don't go!!!" It was all I could do on the drive home not to stop and get ice cream or beer. I did treat myself to a coffee today, but found one with a LOT less calories than what I had previously been getting.

Just remember, YOU CAN DO THIS!!! No negative self talk!!! We are all here for you!

dsignite88

I would try going in baby steps. Try eating more fruits and vegetables and healthy foods. Seeing a regular doctor is definitely a good idea. You might want to concentrate on your eating habits first and then when you are more accustomed to eating less, try a non strenuous form of exercise such as walking or swimming. Good luck!

Yeah I definitely agree with all this. Just take it a day at a time as well. You're going to have good days and bad days but you CAN do it. You are sooo much stronger than you think you are. Best of luck!

deksgrl

You can do this. One step at a time, one day at a time.

catbubbles

Good luck in your journey. This has been a great support group for me and I know it will be for you as well. If you have a smartphone or tablet, I would definitely suggest downloading this app to that device because when I have to constantly see it, I'm reminded to get moving.

Using your smartphone is a GREAT idea. I have the app and it helps me keep on track so much. I may even be a bit obsessive, which helps too. Many times I am logging what I am eating as I am eating it. This way I can put in how much I am allowing myself to eat and then I know I should stop at that amount because I already have it entered. It makes me rethink before I eat more than I allotted myself.

MFP can be very supportive. Just knowing that you are doing if for yourself, but others are watching can be motivating. When you see your MFP friends doing well, it makes you want to keep up and do well also. If you want friends, you can add me.

Just stick to it and remember it is all about your health and happiness!!!!

maybeazure

Hi, at least you aren't ignoring the problem anymore, and going to your doctor and joining this site are great first steps. If you'd like to be friends, feel free to add me.

Mcgrawhaha

even a simple walk each night after dinner will help so much! you don't have to jump into a full blown routine and change, which might overwhelm you. incorporate walks into your life each day. you have dogs? if so, walk them, if not, put some headphones in, and walk! when you are preparing your food, cut your portions down, leave some ingredients down. im about to switch over to maintenance, and even when I do, im going to use ingredients different from what I used before. fruits can be turned into awesome treats! do you have a sweet tooth? I do! I like to take some frozen fresh mixed berries, put into the blender with a cup of 30 cal almond milk, and blend it up, top with 15 cal fat free cool whip! my kids love it! or, slice up a banana, and freeze it. put the frozen banana into the blender with a scoop of peanut butter and a cup of 30 cal almond milk... mmmmm peanut butter banana smoothie! same thing with food, be creative! make a huge salad, try new veggies, use pomegranate seeds and the juice with red vinegar for dressing instead of some high cal fatty ranch. add fresh spinach to almost any pasta / Asian meal to make your small portion larger without the added calories. you can do it!

ashandloggiesmom

Hi! You can't say no to food entirely, but you absolutely CAN say no to eating the way you are used to doing it! This site is a great help, add me I would love to help motivate you. Take it one day at a time, on my good days when I eat well, it gives me the motivation to keep at it the next. But it all starts with ONE day, the one that you decide you need change and your already there Kudos to you!

mmouse90

Don't look at it as a diet since they are temporary and fail; look at it as a lifestyle change. You are changing the way you eat and treat your body because you want to be a good role model for your sister. Also make the changes at a comfortable pace and not all at once. If you try to change too much at one time you will become very frustrated. I started by no longer going to fast food places and no more soda. I started drinking teas and juices and if I was eating out it had to be a restaurant where I had to sit down and eat at. Then I started replacing the teas and juices with water (kept green tea since that is suppose to help in weight loss) and started cooking meals at home. It was gradual but every time I just tried to make a lot of changes at once I became frustrated and went back to my old ways. I did it with exercise as well, started walking then moved to jogging and would go as long as I could then would walk some more. I actually set a path for me work with that was 1.5 miles; I would jog as much of it as I could but in order to get home I still had to walk the rest of it. Learning how portions really work and calories associated with them has help a lot as well. I took the time to learn as much as I could using the internet on how to calculate my calories, substitute lower calorie ingredients in my recipes and things like that. Its not easy at first and takes some getting use to you but you eventually do get there.

08kat

You've already taken the first step. Don't look back, just keep moving forward and you will succeed. Feel free to add me as a friend :flowerforyou: