The Purina Diet

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NeuroticVirgo
NeuroticVirgo Posts: 3,671 Member
I was in the check out lane at walmart buying a bag of Purina dog chow when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog chow, RIGHT???

So on impulse I told her no, I didn't have a dog. I was starting the Purina diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in a hospital last time, but that I lost 50 pounds before I woke up in intensive care, with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and all you had to do is load your pockets with purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food it nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.( I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story) horrified, the woman asked if I had ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodles butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

This made me laugh, thought I would share. :drinker:

Replies

  • WildBillR
    WildBillR Posts: 77 Member
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    Thank you - you made my day - ROFLMAO.
  • Jlbaker08
    Jlbaker08 Posts: 18 Member
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    Will you be my best friend? This is fantastic!
  • Diyamommy
    Diyamommy Posts: 56
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    ohh my God......I am at work and laughing so hard, my co workers are staring
  • daniellemm1
    daniellemm1 Posts: 465 Member
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    You are brilliant!! I wish I could think on my feet like that :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • catsnap213
    catsnap213 Posts: 33 Member
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    LOVE IT!!!!!!
  • Foxtrot2N
    Foxtrot2N Posts: 184 Member
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    That was hilarious!!! I needed that on a Monday morning! Thank you. =)
  • janatarnhem
    janatarnhem Posts: 669 Member
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    LOL! Cheers :drinker:
  • TattedInStilettos
    TattedInStilettos Posts: 331 Member
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    Lol, dumb questions get dumb answers all day... I love this...
  • Philllbis
    Philllbis Posts: 801 Member
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    Lol, I would have totally backed you up on this if I was in line. People ask the dumbest questions!
  • NeuroticVirgo
    NeuroticVirgo Posts: 3,671 Member
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    You are brilliant!! I wish I could think on my feet like that :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Me too! I saw this online and it just cracked me up! I would never be that quick thinking.
  • chatogal
    chatogal Posts: 436 Member
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    heard this same story on facebook!!
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,472 Member
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    ha ha ha ha
  • chatogal
    chatogal Posts: 436 Member
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    You are brilliant!! I wish I could think on my feet like that :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Me too! I saw this online and it just cracked me up! I would never be that quick thinking.

    phew...:smile:
  • chatogal
    chatogal Posts: 436 Member
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    You are brilliant!! I wish I could think on my feet like that :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Me too! I saw this online and it just cracked me up! I would never be that quick thinking.

    phew...:smile:
  • chadraeder3
    chadraeder3 Posts: 288
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    You could have just said "Nope, just starting the Purina diet. Here's your sign!" in your best Bill Engvall voice