Getting over gym paranoia/anxiety

AnvilHead

a45cal wrote: »

billglitch wrote: »

My son has been the subject of snotty remarks at different gyms over the passed 2 years. It happens. Some people have nothing better to do that judge or make snotty comments. I say "F" them. Do it for you

So when you say your son's been to multiple gyms and gotten "snotty" remarks at all of them, I start to wonder what your son's doing in the gym. I'm the only woman I've ever seen use the weight room at my gym, and no one's ever said *kitten* to me. Is sonny boy curling in the squat rack or something?

Interesting and insightful question. I've been training (on and off) in gyms since I was 15-16 years old, so almost 40 years. I've trained in well over 20 gyms in three different states and have never once had anybody make a snotty or derogatory comment to me in a gym. I've trained when I was a skinny, scrawny teenager, I've trained when I was a fat, out of shape adult, and I've trained when I was looking good and in pretty decent shape. Has anybody judged me or thought badly of me/what I was doing? I don't know; I don't pay attention and don't care, I'm not there for them. I'm there for me.

You have every bit as much right to be in a gym and work out as anybody else in that gym does, regardless of what shape you're in, how much you weigh, how old/young you are or what your goals are. Use some common sense and gym etiquette, don't do stupid things and don't act like a douche, and you'll blend in with everybody else who's there to do their own thing.

One of the best things I've ever heard said was "What other people think of you is none of your business".

jolive7

MeganAM89 wrote: »

jolive7 wrote: »

I don't think it is a healthy mantra to be telling yourself "you are not that important" re-phrase that please! Internal mantras can have massive effects and you are manifesting that you are not important if you do that. I would try something like "every session gets me one step closer to my goal" or "just need to get through today's session" "this is only one hour of my day" etc etc.

I've been to a psychologist for my anxiety and we agreed that if this is something that works for me then to do it. Like when I'm nervous for an appointment I berate myself in my head and say something like, "you're being *kitten* stupid. You're the only one that's scared."

I don't think any less of myself, it's me telling my anxiety to *kitten* off.

If it works for you!

donutbears

If you can try going to an earlier class with less people. Give yourself the opportunity to familiarize yourself with how the class is run.

Or just get in there and go have fun. Dont take it so seriously and remember everyone else was a newbie at one point. I used to go to group fitness classes all the time and I never pay attention to people around me honestly.

rubydrm

I was the EXACT same way. Still kind of am. But my bro (he's my best friend) encouraged me and encouraged and reassured me til the cows came home that NO ONE was judging me and I thought..."yeah, that's what they SAY, but they really are". It took me three months to finally go in. And even when I did, the night before I wa so anxious I barely slept. When I got close to the gym, I almost turned the car around and went home. When I got out of the car it was a struggle. I felt like vomiting all over. I walked inside and NO ONE stared. I'm pretty quiet so my bro came over, made sure I was checked in right, and led me over to a group of ladies and there I stood. Then the instructor just told me to group up with this group of ladies for the days workouts and that was that. They were all nice. Just like my bro said they would be. None of them laughed at me like I was for sure they would. And now, six weeks in, I still get nervous about things, but at least now I feel more comfortable with these people. From the Spartan runners to the beginners, everyone is there for one thing. To improve themselves. And while some of them are quiet like me, there are those who will say, "good job, keep going, you can do it" and the mix of it all is perfect.

My advice: Rip the band aide off. Just go for it. Your anxiety will ease up with time. Mine took a few weeks but now I look forward to my 5am workout and seeing the progression of everyone in class--it's such a motivator. You won't regret it.

You CAN do it!!!!!! #yourestrongerthanyouthink

Valrotha

To be completely honest, I rarely see anyone who impresses me at the gym. Don't mean that to be hateful, but most people there (including myself) are just average folks trying to improve themselves.

As with most people, I suspect, you notice yourself and your own "shortcomings" more than anyone else. Just get in there and do it.

irishguns

You, like everybody else, will be there to improve yourself. I had horrible anxiety about going to classes but once I got there I realized that there was not a single person there, other than the instructor, paying attention to me. It didn't matter if I couldn't go as fast as others or do a full push up. The instructor helped me find ways to modify until I got there and at the end of class we were all dripping with sweat and congratulating each other for making it through.

emiliaalison

Honestly, like everyone else has said, no one will be paying attention. Especially in a class. Everyone focuses on the instructors to ensure they are following proper form, the correct moves etc. But I have been in your shoes. I was so nervous when I started a new class. I will say what helped me, is getting there before the class started and chatting with some of the people waiting. I explained that it was my first time there and I was nervous. I got reassurance from everyone and stuck close to the women I chatted with. It worked ! Keep your head up! Everyone is at the gym for the same reasons and most of us have felt the same way ! You'll get through the anxiety and not even think twice about it soon!

girlwithcurls2

Just smile and say, "This is so much fun! I can't wait until I get the hang of it!"
Pretty soon, you won't be the new person anyway...

aerochic42

An idea to help with the mental side. Find a piece of workout clothing/ new shoes/ or hairband thing you REALLY like and wear it to the first class but not before. You already got an esteem boost because of wearing something new that you like a lot, which makes the nerves/anxiety smaller and then it is easier. think of wearing new clothes as armor to get you through the (mental) fight. Armor on, now kick some *kitten*.

Sarahb29

People that are in these classes are probably sweating too much to focus on anyone else but themselves. I think you should sign up for what interests you most and have fun!

Sara1791

So many people here are saying that no one cares or judges but I call B.S.

I've been over in chit chat a time or two and people do care and do judge. If your shorts are too long or too short, your pants are too sheer when you squat, your make up is too done, your deodorant is too strongly scented, you are unfamiliar with the rules of the weight room and you curl in the squat rack, you're into light weights/high reps, you walk on the treadmill instead of running - these are all real complaints I've read right here in these forums.

That said, I go anyway and those people can scratch my *kitten*.

edit for typo

edit to add: There's one over there now about how people hate to be spoken to at the gym. So yeah.

jo_nz

I never felt that comfortable at the gym. So I don't go any more!
That's not to say I don't do any exercise, but the gym isn't for me, and I'm fine with that.

I'd say give it a bit more of a try as it does take a while to learn the moves, and everyone there was new once too. But don't feel like it's an absolute necessity to learn to love it.