How to deal with unsupportive people?

Unknown

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n1terunner

This sounds to me like you're changing, he's not, he's not interested and may feel threatened. I'm not a relationship expert (flew the last one into the ground hard), but I read Men Are From Mars and being a man I can tell you that it would be best if you laid it out in plain English. "Hey, I love you and I'm doing this, I know you think you're funny with getting in my face but I don't appreciate it. You don't have to exercise with me or eat my food choices, though I would really love that, but please stop antagonizing what I'm doing."

Him going halfway is not taunting you (probably insecurity being expressed as humor), you going halfway is realizing he may choose to not be your exercise partner.

I wanted that so bad out of the last relationship I was in. It's going to be a big deal for me next time to find someone who I can workout and enjoy running with. Best of luck.

annie63301

I will say my husband has been the most supportive but I find other people I know have questioned the reason Im doing this and it is very frustrating!!! Someone went as far to say am I doing this for myself or my husband. It is sad when you are trying to better yourself and health and because people are unhappy within they cant acknowledge the good you are trying to do for yourself!!!

MelodyandBarbells

Cutaway_Collar wrote: »

I don't understand. Would wives appreciate if the husbands ask to diet together? There will be a nuclear war.

Hahaha. "I'm fat and I think you're fat, too. Let's do this, honey!!"

Heh. I think they just want a buddy in the process. But I'll stick to my initial comments. If that's important, then focus on finding the buddies at your destination, not necessarily at home. This site is full of people who will never ever shut up about various forms of eating, and the gym is literally full of people who workout regularly. If a buddy is what you want, I'm sure one can be found.

annie63301

You can do it!!!!!!

Missy_Lifts

jvcjcooper wrote: »

punch to the throat, taser, ax through the head, multiple gunshots.... repeat as necessary or until the police drop by.

I love this technique!

vikinglander

FOCUS ON YOU

Gaygirl2120

newmeadow wrote: »

JennyJen82 wrote: »

It's the point he does it all the time. Yea I get it from some of the responses I don't need a cheerleader, I shouldn't be bothered by it and so on, but I am bothered by it...it does hurt my feelings that he can't support me by simply not waving stuff in my face or when I'm ready to go out for a walk he tells me to stay home and spend time with him. It would be nice to have someone understand this journey is a struggle for me and I'm doing my best. I thought that's what this site was for inspiration, motivation and people who understand the struggles.

I don't feel sorry for you. I struggle with my weight and I'm 245 pounds and have been overweight for 21 years. I've been on this site for 2+ years and I'm 49 years old. Struggle? Yeah, a lot of people know what real struggle is on this site.

You're young, pretty and your husband loves you exactly how you are and has assured you of that. He does not criticize your appearance. He approves of it and enjoys it. And you can't understand how he would possibly feel that way. He must be wrong or really stupid or just callously unsupportive.

I never tire of reading posts like this. It seems the best relationships are wasted on the ones who don't appreciate them. As are youth, health and good looks.

That was unnecessarily harsh & I don't believe she was asking for sympathy.

Unknown

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n1terunner

Jax2120 wrote: »

newmeadow wrote: »

JennyJen82 wrote: »

It's the point he does it all the time. Yea I get it from some of the responses I don't need a cheerleader, I shouldn't be bothered by it and so on, but I am bothered by it...it does hurt my feelings that he can't support me by simply not waving stuff in my face or when I'm ready to go out for a walk he tells me to stay home and spend time with him. It would be nice to have someone understand this journey is a struggle for me and I'm doing my best. I thought that's what this site was for inspiration, motivation and people who understand the struggles.

I don't feel sorry for you. I struggle with my weight and I'm 245 pounds and have been overweight for 21 years. I've been on this site for 2+ years and I'm 49 years old. Struggle? Yeah, a lot of people know what real struggle is on this site.

You're young, pretty and your husband loves you exactly how you are and has assured you of that. He does not criticize your appearance. He approves of it and enjoys it. And you can't understand how he would possibly feel that way. He must be wrong or really stupid or just callously unsupportive.

I never tire of reading posts like this. It seems the best relationships are wasted on the ones who don't appreciate them. As are youth, health and good looks.

That was unnecessarily harsh & I don't believe she was asking for sympathy.

Have to agree with Jax. Also, I don't think the husband supports it at all. One time is playing, sounds like he is doing this often. This is a threat to his comfort and probably plays on his fears that her desired attractiveness will cause him problems - may not be consciously thinking it, but it's sitting somewhere in there. Still think direct talking about it with him would help.

Look at the actions, not the words.