Question about friends

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Tacklewasher
Tacklewasher Posts: 7,122 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Really hope this doesn't come across wrong, but what is the benefit to friends on MFP?

I'm not much into social media like FB, Twitter or whatever the hell the kids are doing these days, but enjoy forum posting here and elsewhere.

I've got friend requests which, up to now, I've been ignoring or declining. I guess I just don't know what the "friends" thing here is. Do you share more info? I know your diary can be open to only friends but (I think) I have mine fully open.

So what am I missing by not having friends?
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Replies

  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,874 Member
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    I don't interact much on my home page. That said, most of my friends are people that I've come across over the years that have similar interests...mostly from a fitness standpoint. I don't think there's a whole lot of benefit to just having a bunch of random friends unless you are the type that needs rah rah cheerleading.
  • DietPrada
    DietPrada Posts: 1,171 Member
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    Some people do better with support from others. Some also feel it helps to keep them accountable. If you have MFP "friends" then on your home page you can see when people comment, record a loss etc. They might also like or comment on your loss, making you feel good. It's a good idea to have "friends" who are similar to you in eating styles etc. For example my feed is full of fellow low carbers - so I can get ideas from them. It's really up to you whether you want to connect with others but I think it helps.
  • cosmonew
    cosmonew Posts: 514 Member
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    I prefer MFP to facebook. I like to see that they have completed a fitness activity and what it was...somedays that gets me off the couch. I also like to see other peoples food diary for ideas and again motivation for me to do the right thing. It helps me to know others are doing the same thing I am doing and to see them doing it. It helps if their posts are not just the generic ones MFP generates.
  • EzRemake
    EzRemake Posts: 128 Member
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    Some people on this site will randomly add you, and then get mad a week later when you haven't been 'liking' all their posts and commenting on their 3 daily pictures. Not only will they remove you, but they will send you a break up letter.

    Just another avenue for people to get their ego on.
  • Tacklewasher
    Tacklewasher Posts: 7,122 Member
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    EzRemake wrote: »
    Some people on this site will randomly add you, and then get mad a week later when you haven't been 'liking' all their posts and commenting on their 3 daily pictures. Not only will they remove you, but they will send you a break up letter.

    Just another avenue for people to get their ego on.

    Ooooh.

    That sounds like fun. Might be worth it for a laugh. :)

    Honestly, doesn't sound like something I'm into. My motivation is internal. Not doing the weight loss for anyone but me. I'm accountable to my wife and that's about it.

    Thanks for the responses though.
  • GiddyupTim
    GiddyupTim Posts: 2,819 Member
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    I believe it holds you more accountable, knowing that someone is going to see, and notice, if you miss your calorie goals or fail to exercise.
    I believe social support has value.
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
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    I'm not into all this social media stuff either, but I like having some friends here on MFP. I find the support and encouragement helpful, and sometimes it's just nice to be able to share a gripe or a success with others who've travelled the same road with you a while. Now and again there's someone I don't really click with or who never seems to interact outside of their automatic notifications, but most of those I've 'met' so far are lovely people. :)

    On the other hand, I have a RL friend who lost over 100lbs only using MFP for the diary, and never bothered with the forums or the whole friends thing here. Each to their own!
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
    edited November 2016
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    I'm a bad, bad unsupportive MFP friend :flushed: I hardly ever check my newsfeed, and I did specify this in my profile (I'm with everyone in spirit). I don't send out friend requests any more, but i accept them because i feel bad if i don't..

    I don't get into social media, i cancelled my facebook and have no clue what twitter, instigram and that Tinder thing i keep hearing about it is. MFP forums is the only "group" I'm a member of.

    I rage quit Facebook after seeing one too many "My life sucks" posts, and when asked what's wrong they reply with "i don't wanna talk about it"... all i want is sympathy and you are awesome comments.
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
    edited November 2016
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    Some discussions I'll have on my home page with a smaller crowd because I want that crowd for that discussion, and some discussions I'll have in the Community because I want that crowd for that discussion. Besides, most of my mfp friends asked me first and most of them did so because of some comment I'd made in the Community. I figure they see more value in the mfp friendship than I do so wysiwyg.
  • CharlesScott78
    CharlesScott78 Posts: 203 Member
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    I have to agree with a lot of the other posters - the accountability. Honesty is the freedom from self deception. I like to keep myself honest. :smile:
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
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    grmckenzie wrote: »
    Really hope this doesn't come across wrong, but what is the benefit to friends on MFP?

    I'm not much into social media like FB, Twitter or whatever the hell the kids are doing these days, but enjoy forum posting here and elsewhere.

    I've got friend requests which, up to now, I've been ignoring or declining. I guess I just don't know what the "friends" thing here is. Do you share more info? I know your diary can be open to only friends but (I think) I have mine fully open.

    So what am I missing by not having friends?

    If you don't understand what friends with benefits is, I'm not explaining it! :wink:

    I have a small group of friends. I am not a great friend. In and out, interactive for a short period of time and then ignore everyone for a while. I can say this much. Because of coming in to check on my friends, my health and weight loss goals stay in my mind. Even when I take a break from logging or actively trying to lose, it's stays in my mind that I need to get back to it when I can.

    Another benefit is that there are some amazing people here, and it's great to share joy/sorrow, failures/triumphs with them. They are an amazing support system, and I am always open to lending an ear when needed/wanted. I do hope to meet some of them in person some day. I guess I need to sort out my passport though...
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
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    queenliz99 wrote: »
    All my friends are unicorns, so there's that!

    Do you get to frolic in the forest with them? Sounds fun!
  • Tacklewasher
    Tacklewasher Posts: 7,122 Member
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    Always_Kriss wrote: »
    I go back and forth on the friend thing but in the end i usually end up deleting everyone lol

    Simply because i sometimes feel like i enjoy the social interaction but not everyone is in the same place as you are and by the time you are done reading and wading through all the posts from people upset that they ate a cookie or went over by 20 calories or that they didn't excersize today, you're so mentally exhausted you just wanna do a virtual face plant into a paved driveway.

    Yeah. I'm known for not having a reasonable tolerance level for that kind of stuff.

    Something about being a grumpy old, how do we say it here? Kitten.

    And get off my damn lawn.
  • TonyB0588
    TonyB0588 Posts: 9,520 Member
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    grmckenzie wrote: »
    Really hope this doesn't come across wrong, but what is the benefit to friends on MFP?

    I'm not much into social media like FB, Twitter or whatever the hell the kids are doing these days, but enjoy forum posting here and elsewhere.

    I've got friend requests which, up to now, I've been ignoring or declining. I guess I just don't know what the "friends" thing here is. Do you share more info? I know your diary can be open to only friends but (I think) I have mine fully open.

    So what am I missing by not having friends?

    I'm just like you re: Social Media. But I've accepted a few requests and sent a few as well. I notice some like to tell the whole story of their daily life on the friend's newsfeed, while others post very little. Some are consistent MFPers, while others don't even log in for a few days running.

    I guess it's mainly good for Likes and Comments, and some comparisons to other friends' activity and calories.
  • TonyB0588
    TonyB0588 Posts: 9,520 Member
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    GiddyupTim wrote: »
    I believe it holds you more accountable, knowing that someone is going to see, and notice, if you miss your calorie goals or fail to exercise.
    I believe social support has value.

    Accountability is often stated as the reason for requesting friends. Strange enough, I went through my friends list and sent messages to a few who hadn't logged in for a while or had stopped completing their diaries, and one was absolutely shocked that I would actually even notice.
  • NewCat63
    NewCat63 Posts: 50 Member
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    I had a couple of "friends" recently and ended up deleting them because annoyingly they practically recorded every last thing they did down to wrapping their christmas presents. I was fed up of seeing their daily activities on my newsfeed. Then bizarrely one of them posted abuse on a subject I had started in the community section. They just couldn't accept that I wasn't interested in such detail. It didn't stop at one nasty comment so I had to report her and have her comments removed. I should name and shame her but that would make me as bad. Now I just have two friends who know how to behave lol
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
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    queenliz99 wrote: »
    All my friends are unicorns, so there's that!

    Wait, how did I miss this? Where do I find a unicorn friend?!

    No, wait... a dragon! I want a dragon. :)

    (Seriously, I really want a dragon. A small pet one will do, as long as it doesn't eat the cats.)

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