Need to fall in love with exercise again (at age 45)

wanderinglight

I weighed myself tonight and confronted the truth I've been avoiding for a long, long time. I'm the heaviest I've ever been.

I could list a ton of excuses -- a few recent years of major surgeries and life upheavals, depression and stress from living with my dying mother-in-law for the past year in our tiny home, working two jobs, etc. And I know that those are the very same reasons I should be using as an internal rallying cry to get back in shape, because it will only serve to make me happier and healthier as well as giving me a big mental boost that I desperately need right now.

But.

None of my internal pep talks seem to work any more. I have been working out regularly since I was 14. My whole life, I have LOVED exercise, and it was a non-negotiable part of my existence. You name it, I did it...happily. Yoga, hiking, swimming, team sports, weight-lifting, Crossfit, Pilates, etc.

And now I feel utterly out of love with everything. It's like I suddenly and irrevocably lost my spirit, and NOTHING in the past two years has made me fall back in love. I make desultory fits and starts but it doesn't feel good any more and I'm just going through the motions. It doesn't stick. I can't make it stick.

I was telling my husband tonight that I want to fall back in love again with physical activity, but I don't know what to do next. My last back surgery left me with a permanent limp and a numb leg, so I can't run, which cuts out team sports. I hate walking because my limp is tiring. We are on a financial lockdown, so fancy classes are out. I am a member of a local gym, but I'm not going.

Has anyone been in this position before? Did you fall out of love with working out? What got you back into it?

* I know that eating well is just as, if not more so, important than exercise but I feel like they are two sides of the same coin and if I could find that fire again then it would make it easier to stick with a good eating plan as well.

lorrpb

Try some of the offerings at your gym.Do they offer non-fancy classes? I think that finding something you can do with your current body will make you fall in love again. It might take trial & error. What about biking or swimmimg? Water polo? Aqua Fitness? Skating? TRX. Lifting. None of these involve running.

DancingMoosie

Try some o line workouts in YouTube. There at so many to choose from. Just keep going until you find something you like!

goldthistime

I fell out of love with exercise for a time because I kept comparing out of shape me with in shape me of the past and was constantly disappointed. I "failed" at everything I tried. I'm with lorrpb, there might still be something out there you can enjoy and get good at. I'd add rowing to the list if they have a machine at your gym. But I'd also add strength training, perhaps even more important than cardio. I love cardio but it doesn't make it any easier to lose weight than just cutting my calories (aside from the mood boosting element). The more I exercise the hungrier I get, so I end up with the same amount of hunger whether I got my deficit by cutting calories or exercising more. Best of luck.

helocat

Start light with Yoga if your gym has it. If not YouTube has lots of free offerings. #1 thing that has been helping me is just starting that habit again. I force myself to do the habit. It's hard but much better to start again simple with simple goals. For me this is working.

PennWalker

wanderinglight wrote: »

I weighed myself tonight and confronted the truth I've been avoiding for a long, long time. I'm the heaviest I've ever been.

I could list a ton of excuses -- a few recent years of major surgeries and life upheavals, depression and stress from living with my dying mother-in-law for the past year in our tiny home, working two jobs, etc.

I wouldn't look at these as excuses. This is your reality. You've been through a lot, grief, depression, stress, which has knocked the wind out of your spirit.

My two cents: don't wait for motivation. Just start doing some exercise. Something is better than nothing. Commit to something and do it every day for a while. Then you can adjust it or find a better way. Remember the old saying that 90 percent of success is just showing up.

Azdak

Short of an acute event that slaps you upside the head, I've found that people often need some external motivation to start back up. That can be a goal, a reward, a buddy--there are a number of choices. Make it short-term and realistic-even committing to a consistent two times a week for one month would be a great start.

You might also focus on strength training and stretching instead of cardio at first. You could start with exercises you did in rehab and progress from there.

middlehaitch

Heck, I have never loved any type of exercise (I think 'like' is a kind word for my thoughts on exercising) but I do it.

Why? Because I like what exercising can do for me.

Could I do vacations filled with adventure, zip lining, rappelling, hiking, snorkelling, etc, without a decent fitness level? No.

Could I have so much fun with my 6yo grandson as he grows without a second thought? No.

Could I have an insurance health assessment without one query? No.

A love of wxercise isn't needed, dedication and knowing you are improving your quality of life is.

If you need to lose weight- a calorie deficit will do that; no exercise needed.

Look at your life, decide what you want out of it, long term, and plan for that.

If we only did what we loved short term, we wouldn't achieve what we wanted out of life long term.

Cheers, h.

PS; this is coming from a 63yo woman that had avoided exercise like the plague until she was 54 and realized that she had to work to have the life she wanted.

wanderinglight

Thank you so much for your thoughtful replies. There is so much good advice here and I truly appreciate it.