I failed ... ughhh
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As someone much smarter than me once said, the road to progress rarely follows a straight line. There are twists and turns, and sometimes you even end up going backwards for a while. If you embrace that notion and continue to stay the course, progress will be achieved.3
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I failed too!!
I didn't care at all over the holidays and also stopped keeping tracks a couple of months ago and gained a stone! I feel really low. Oh well, time to start over (and actually a stone more than where I was before).
@maeveodm i was really down, like really bad yesterday. Makes me mad. I make progress, good progress. Then bammmm. I fail. And when i fail i legit like terribly fail. I guess at least its good to be able to start over tho right?0 -
livingleanlivingclean wrote: »For me, a ruined Christmas would mean I'd had a rubbish time, avoiding food and festivities, and generally felt miserable because I was restricting myself.
You have not failed.you haven't ruined anything. You did "life". Start again now, keep logging and move on.
@livingleanlivingclean thank you for that!! That was much needed!!!!1 -
I gained 5 delicious pounds over Christmas. Oh well, back on it this week. It'll be gone soon enough. We didn't fail, we just enjoyed ourselves as happens in life. I'll do the same next Christmas. And the next. In fact, new years day will probably be a calorie laden disaster. Oh well.
@mskimee very true very true! I think sometimes i just hold myself to so many standards. This is like the only thing i fail at. Taking care of my eating and health. Urghhhhh.0 -
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TryingToMakeTheRealMe wrote: »I gained 5 delicious pounds over Christmas. Oh well, back on it this week. It'll be gone soon enough. We didn't fail, we just enjoyed ourselves as happens in life. I'll do the same next Christmas. And the next. In fact, new years day will probably be a calorie laden disaster. Oh well.
@mskimee very true very true! I think sometimes i just hold myself to so many standards. This is like the only thing i fail at. Taking care of my eating and health. Urghhhhh.
Then stop looking at it as pass/fail, and look at it in shades of grey and a learning experience. What would you say to a friend who is in your exact position? Would you tell them they are a failure? Why do you deserve to be treated with any less respect than that which you would treat a friend? You don't need to answer these questions, but do think about them.4 -
Docbanana2002 wrote: »You will be more successful if you let go of the all or nothing mentality. I've done all the "all the way failures" that you describe, multiple times, sometimes on repeat, sometimes worse than you describe, and somehow managed to lose 110 pounds and keep it off for over a year now and even run multiple races like a half marathon last spring and a triathlon this summer. Your problem is not that you failed miserably, it is that you have unrealistic expectations about how perfect a real life "successful at being fit" person must be, and it is setting you up to give up in despair. Your husband didn't get skinny by always being perfect and if you get skinny and healthy and fit, you won't get there by perfection either. You will get there by perseverance over the long haul. You'll have days where you are on fire with motivation, and breaking fitness records, and eating to a level of nutritional perfection that would make a dietitian smile, then on other days you will want to sit around on the couch eat a whole cake.
That's okay. It happens to all of us mortals. Most days I'm somewhere in between those extremes, not on fire to run a marathon but getting some exercise anyway, not being nutritionally "perfect" but working some treats into a generally healthy diet and living within my calorie budget.
The trick to success not perfection, but consistency. Forgive yourself for being a normal mortal who isn't always on the plan and settle for being generally on track-- ideally on track more hours of the day than not--and you will make gradual progress in the right direction. You'll have occasional setbacks too....and the quicker you dust yourself off and get back in the race, the better. No self defeating thoughts! Just learn what you can learn from the experience and move on with the usual plan (I've learned not to keep whole cakes in my house..... and that my most destructive setbacks often come after periods of extreme deprivation and so It is best to take things slow and steady.)
@Docbanana that was very amazing. Kinda made me feel like you were in my brain a little. And you hit the nail right on the head!1 -
I really beat myself up over this whole christmas thing. Like really did. Lol but all the replies really made it a lot better. I love the support from everyone and all the encouragement!!! I stayed on track today and was kinda under!! I had double the amount of clients today, so i was all over the hospital and all!!! Thank you all. Making this a lot easier and all the words and advise are so awesome!2
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nutmegoreo wrote: »TryingToMakeTheRealMe wrote: »I gained 5 delicious pounds over Christmas. Oh well, back on it this week. It'll be gone soon enough. We didn't fail, we just enjoyed ourselves as happens in life. I'll do the same next Christmas. And the next. In fact, new years day will probably be a calorie laden disaster. Oh well.
@mskimee very true very true! I think sometimes i just hold myself to so many standards. This is like the only thing i fail at. Taking care of my eating and health. Urghhhhh.
Then stop looking at it as pass/fail, and look at it in shades of grey and a learning experience. What would you say to a friend who is in your exact position? Would you tell them they are a failure? Why do you deserve to be treated with any less respect than that which you would treat a friend? You don't need to answer these questions, but do think about them.
@nutmegoreo i know you said i dont neeeeed to answer. But i kinda felt like I wanted to lol thats a great way to look at it. Many of my friends have kids and are busy busy. They dont seeeeeeem to have the issues i do. Most of my females friends dont have problems losing weight. At all. And some friends tell me its genetic. And yeah, medical wise i get it. But. I. Want. To. Break. The. Cycle. And i want it sooooo bad. So i feel i hold myself to unrealistic goals sometimes. Weighed myself today. Down 1.2 pounds. And i was actually happy. I stress hitting a plateau because it always happens with me. I did start my prepping again. And having healthier things within reach the last day or so. Trying. Not failing. Thats how i should look at it. Just ugh lol0 -
I get it. I've been there. It took a long time to retrain my brain. To accept that as a human, things happen. As long as I stuck to my plan more often than I didn't, I knew I would see progress. All I'm saying is to be kinder to yourself and stop considering it failure. Rough days happen. As I gave myself permission to be human and to have things that I had forever told myself were forbidden, I started to actually want them less often. I still had them, but I planned for them, and they became an acceptable part of my routine.
I still enjoy time out with my friends. I can plan on the fly. In fact, I rarely preplan my day, because I have decided to give myself permission to have higher and lower days. Sometimes you just have a day where you feel more hungry. It's okay. Because that one day will not undo all the other days where you are hitting your targets. I logged my stupidly high calorie days, and realized that in the end, they may have slowed me down for that week, but sometimes they didn't and they certainly don't stop overall progress.
It takes time and patience, but reframe your thinking. It will lift a weight off of your shoulders, like you won't believe.2 -
Holy moly...give yourself a break. You're human. All this emotional beating can't be good.
I think we ALL gained weight from Christmas. I gained 5lbs, so what? It's not 50lbs. You did not ruin anything. The most important thing is to stop beating yourself up emotionally, give yourself a break and move on. Get back into your plan. If you've cut foods out to lose weight, stop.. reintroduce them in small amounts. Just weigh your food and log it.livingleanlivingclean wrote: »For me, a ruined Christmas would mean I'd had a rubbish time, avoiding food and festivities, and generally felt miserable because I was restricting myself.
You have not failed.you haven't ruined anything. You did "life". Start again now, keep logging and move on.
So much this. Love this.1 -
That's not failing. It was a brief time off plan. If you're in this to lose weight & keep it off for good then that was just a blip. & you can learn from this so that next time going off plan can be intentional and moderate.1
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Absolutely guys!! Thank you all soooo much!!! Heres to the new year!!! Happy new year everyone!!!1
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Always loved this quote from Winston Churchill:
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."1 -
You did not fail. You had a few days or maybe a week out of the year. It is but a blip in the big picture. Remember this is not a short term thing, this is making small, progressive long term changes. Part of those changes will be learning that there are days where you will eat more because on those days it is more important to enjoy being with family or friends, and the vast majority of the days are spent eating at an appropriate level.0
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