How do you handle social events?

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I am in my second week with MFP and am really pleased with my weight loss to date, but these initial weeks have been almost totally under my control. My husband and I have two social events this week and the following weekend we have been invited to spend with friends at a mountain cabin. I am starting to worry a little that these will set me back. How do you handle eating at other people's homes. Do you let them know in advance that you are on a diet? Do you eat really lightly in advance and then eat as well as you can with what is offered? Advice welcome.
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Replies

  • pitegny
    pitegny Posts: 1,006 Member
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    jemhh wrote: »
    It's really helpful if you have an idea of what kind of food will be available. I know which of my friends/family are likely to have food that is workable so I can decide whether to eat a bit ahead of time or not. Since you are going for the weekend next week, I'd suggest volunteering to take some food ("Thank you so much for inviting us. I'd like to bring some food for everybody. I was thinking of a veggie tray. I've been trying to eat better and find that veggies are so filling and blahblahblah...") For this weekend, what are the events?

    My husband will be skiing, I'll be doing some walking, but mainly sitting around catching up with friends, unfortunately. Snow may limit outdoor actvities for the non-skiers, including me.


  • Chadxx
    Chadxx Posts: 1,199 Member
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    Great advice so far. This must be a permanent change and not a diet. If you have a few extra calories while enjoying time with friends or family, oh well. Just don't go overboard. Exercise some judgement and self control and and make reasonable choices and keep your portions in check.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    NO I don't let people know I am on o a diet because I am not on a temporary weight loss kick.

    I do social events and eat the food there and don't expect "special" treatment...

    I eat in smaller portions and try to log as best I can. If they ask if I want more I say no thanks I am quite satisfied thank you....

    but I also allow for extra calories when it's required either just allowing myself the extra calories or earning them before I go through the week by cutting back or exercising more...

    It is not the daily calories that are going to make or break you it is the long term deficit you are in and if you have a few extra hundred calories at teh end of the week to eat go for it...if you want.
  • estherdragonbat
    estherdragonbat Posts: 5,283 Member
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    I find that journaling what I plan to eat, as opposed to what I just ate helps loads. Partly because, if I think I might want to have a piece of cake or a drink or what have you, I've already seen that it fits into my daily total. So it's a treat, but not a cheat. (This works best when you've got an idea of the food that's going to be there, because you can source the calories ahead of time.)
  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
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    A few things you can do. A) take food that you know the nutritional value of. B) Log as accurately as you can, and if there is something that you absolutely do not want to have due to how it fits in your calories, rely on food from A. C) Enjoy the event, making reasonable choices, and understanding that one meal or one day does not define your life. D) Get in extra walks, aim for smaller portions of other meals in the day to leave room for the social meals where you have less control.
    pitegny wrote: »
    I am in my second week with MFP and am really pleased with my weight loss to date, but these initial weeks have been almost totally under my control. My husband and I have two social events this week and the following weekend we have been invited to spend with friends at a mountain cabin. I am starting to worry a little that these will set me back. How do you handle eating at other people's homes. Do you let them know in advance that you are on a diet? Do you eat really lightly in advance and then eat as well as you can with what is offered? Advice welcome.

  • pitegny
    pitegny Posts: 1,006 Member
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    This is all great advice and very much appreciated. This is the third time I have tried to change my eating habits and lose weight. I very much want this time to be the one that works. The strong sense of MFP community is giving me hope that this might be it. Thanks!
  • k8eekins
    k8eekins Posts: 2,264 Member
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    pitegny wrote: »
    I am in my second week with MFP and am really pleased with my weight loss to date, but these initial weeks have been almost totally under my control. My husband and I have two social events this week and the following weekend we have been invited to spend with friends at a mountain cabin. I am starting to worry a little that these will set me back. How do you handle eating at other people's homes. Do you let them know in advance that you are on a diet? Do you eat really lightly in advance and then eat as well as you can with what is offered? Advice welcome.

    I never burden my host's kitchen with my diet/eating plan. I always survey the tableau@meal times, I zero in on what I'll accept on my plate (ie meat/meatless proteins mainly) and enjoy it, portion conscious.

  • teags1984
    teags1984 Posts: 14 Member
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    I have enjoyed reading the responses here. Eating out and social events are something I still struggle with, and I am a bit of an all or nothing kind of girl. I really have to start thinking of this as a way of life, and learn not to overeat for the sake of it. I cant tell you the number of times ive been told "come on, just have some birthday cake, you have to live". What these people dont understand is that one piece of cake, for me, sets off a chain reaction of eating more and more sugar for days-its just the way I am. I hope to get to the point where I can go out, go to an event or birthday and enjoy myself by having a little bit of something indulgent without stuffing my face. This balancing act is hard isnt it?
  • ogtmama
    ogtmama Posts: 1,403 Member
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    pitegny wrote: »
    jemhh wrote: »
    It's really helpful if you have an idea of what kind of food will be available. I know which of my friends/family are likely to have food that is workable so I can decide whether to eat a bit ahead of time or not. Since you are going for the weekend next week, I'd suggest volunteering to take some food ("Thank you so much for inviting us. I'd like to bring some food for everybody. I was thinking of a veggie tray. I've been trying to eat better and find that veggies are so filling and blahblahblah...") For this weekend, what are the events?

    My husband will be skiing, I'll be doing some walking, but mainly sitting around catching up with friends, unfortunately. Snow may limit outdoor actvities for the non-skiers, including me.


    Do they have tubing or snowshoeing? Those are both really great ways to be active without much of a skill set. I agree with what everyone is saying but at the end of the day don't be too hard on yourself.enjoy your visit. It's a special occasion. if you go a little over log it and move on. It's not worth losing too much sleep over.
  • pitegny
    pitegny Posts: 1,006 Member
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    teags1984 wrote: »
    I have enjoyed reading the responses here. Eating out and social events are something I still struggle with, and I am a bit of an all or nothing kind of girl. I really have to start thinking of this as a way of life, and learn not to overeat for the sake of it. I cant tell you the number of times ive been told "come on, just have some birthday cake, you have to live". What these people dont understand is that one piece of cake, for me, sets off a chain reaction of eating more and more sugar for days-its just the way I am. I hope to get to the point where I can go out, go to an event or birthday and enjoy myself by having a little bit of something indulgent without stuffing my face. This balancing act is hard isnt it?

    I am much the same. Havng failed before, part of me wonders if one going off regime once might not lead to another time and another. Balancing act is a very good way of putting it.
  • pesigrandi
    pesigrandi Posts: 74 Member
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    It depends on the event. When we go to someone's house I try to eat around it by having a light meal before going and then choosing very small portions of the healthiest items while there. When we get home I'll have a serving of nuts if I'm still hungry. When we meet friends or family at restaurants I try to check out the menu before arrival and plan out what I will order that will fit into our preferred portions (roughly 1/4 protein, 1/4 starch/grain, 1/2 vegetables). However for the month of January we have decided to dine at home unless we have a family obligation.

    I have done Paleo and Whole 30 in the past and found that I felt much better eating that way and easily lost weight. But, I love to cook as well dine at the always changing newest restaurants so this year my boyfriend and I decided we were just going to work on our portion control (and limit our alcohol intake) and not do any type of temporary diet.
  • DebSozo
    DebSozo Posts: 2,578 Member
    edited January 2017
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    If you aim for maintenance calories for the weekend it will allow you more leeway. You won't gain or lose, but no one will really pay attention. The 1/2 plate veggies idea mentioned is good. Veggies visually fill the plate and makes it look like a lot but isn't actually many calories.

    Eat slower than normal while othere are busy eating their food.. Seriously, no one will notice that you are dieting at all unless you mention it.
  • lemonychild
    lemonychild Posts: 654 Member
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    Make sure that you go hungry, i.e., eat less during the day. When u get there fill your plate with salad first, then meat n a side. Do not go back for seconds. Eat slowly so that you have something for the duration of the meal. Drink water. Act normal :)
  • pitegny
    pitegny Posts: 1,006 Member
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    DebSozo wrote: »
    If you aim for maintenance calories for the weekend it will allow you more leeway. You won't gain or lose, but no one will really pay attention. The 1/2 plate veggies idea mentioned is good. Veggies visually fill the plate and makes it look like a lot but isn't actually many calories.

    Eat slower than normal while othere are busy eating their food.. Seriously, no one will notice that you are dieting at all unless you mention it.

    Excellenet suggestion. How do I calculate my maintenance calories?