For the guys on MFP: is this his way of jokingly flirting or just chit chat
Let me start this post by saying I'm not interested in any of my coworkers I am currently seeing someone but I would like to know the answer to this :
I work with this guy named James who talks to me some times not all of the time ..today we worked together just me and him ... and he asked me when was my 21st birthday and I told him it's coming up in August and he said
"if you ever want someone to smoke or drink with them I'm your guy" he said I like to turn up and I laughed and said I'll keep that in mind... a few hours later James went to the bathroom and my team leader moved me to the other side of the warehouse so once we went to break James walked up beside me and said "so you just left me at this side of the warehouse by myself "?
I said "our team leader moved me to help out with the other side And he said "how are we gonna make this relationship work if you leave and don't tell me when or where you going" and he said we"re supposed to be like this (he pushed his hands together ) and I said we are like that And then he said how are we going to have a glass and you don't tell me when to put the water and ice in I laughed because I was confused and walked to break
Once I came back from break I walked past him and he asked me "where are you going now?" I said I'm going back to the side of the warehouse I was moved to " and he said "I was about to talk to you and I said I gotta go" then he smiled rolled his eyes and said bye
He does flirt with me sometimes and take stuff off of my work desk
I work with this guy named James who talks to me some times not all of the time ..today we worked together just me and him ... and he asked me when was my 21st birthday and I told him it's coming up in August and he said
"if you ever want someone to smoke or drink with them I'm your guy" he said I like to turn up and I laughed and said I'll keep that in mind... a few hours later James went to the bathroom and my team leader moved me to the other side of the warehouse so once we went to break James walked up beside me and said "so you just left me at this side of the warehouse by myself "?
I said "our team leader moved me to help out with the other side And he said "how are we gonna make this relationship work if you leave and don't tell me when or where you going" and he said we"re supposed to be like this (he pushed his hands together ) and I said we are like that And then he said how are we going to have a glass and you don't tell me when to put the water and ice in I laughed because I was confused and walked to break
Once I came back from break I walked past him and he asked me "where are you going now?" I said I'm going back to the side of the warehouse I was moved to " and he said "I was about to talk to you and I said I gotta go" then he smiled rolled his eyes and said bye
He does flirt with me sometimes and take stuff off of my work desk
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Hi, I am not one of the men on MFP. I am a 49 year old mom and grandmother. After reading your post I can't help but let you know that if I were in your position, the next time he approached me I would say, "Stop, before you say another word," and I would hold up my phone, "I am going to record every word you say. I have had enough. You are freaking me out so please leave me alone. Another word and I am going to file harassment charges AND, if you decide to get upset and try something anywhere at anytime because you are angry, just a word of advice, I am always packing!" Then I would walk away and avoid him at all cost. Especially in the parking lot, especially if it is at night. Be smart.5
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I'm so confused.3
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LMAO. Esteemed MFP gentleman here.
It's both. He has nothing to lose; he's at work trying to entertain himself and make the time pass easier. But if you take him up on his offer, he's one step closer to the knickers. It's whatevs to him.
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JukeboxHeroine wrote: »I'm so confused.
About what0 -
ajthompson_5 wrote: »Hi, I am not one of the men on MFP. I am a 49 year old mom and grandmother. After reading your post I can't help but let you know that if I were in your position, the next time he approached me I would say, "Stop, before you say another word," and I would hold up my phone, "I am going to record every word you say. I have had enough. You are freaking me out so please leave me alone. Another word and I am going to file harassment charges AND, if you decide to get upset and try something anywhere at anytime because you are angry, just a word of advice, I am always packing!" Then I would walk away and avoid him at all cost. Especially in the parking lot, especially if it is at night. Be smart.
Thanks hun0 -
I'm not quite sure how to interpret your question: I can't tell if your asking for our opinion on if (a) he likes you or (b) you should be concerned about his behavior.
The guy sounds clingy, possessive and somewhat obsessed with you at the moment. If you're accurately reporting what he's saying to you then it may be he's socially awkward (not a creep per se) and is having a hard time coming right out to ask you on a date. it may be harmless (again, he might just be socially inept and isn't sure how to behave around you) but his inability to have a normal conversation with you - coupled with his lack of impulse control in having to follow you & keep track of where you are - are signs that he'll be a major headache to deal with.
Interestingly enough, you didn't mention at all whether or not you like him. You started your post by making it clear that you're already seeing someone, which indicates to me you have feelings for "James". Whether you do or you don't, something isn't right with this relationship you have with him, and I'd keep my distance. If his behavior intensifies Id seriously consider talking to HR.3 -
I'm not quite sure how to interpret your question: I can't tell if your asking for our opinion on if (a) he likes you or (b) you should be concerned about his behavior.
The guy sounds clingy, possessive and somewhat obsessed with you at the moment. If you're accurately reporting what he's saying to you then it may be he's socially awkward (not a creep per se) and is having a hard time coming right out to ask you on a date. it may be harmless (again, he might just be socially inept and isn't sure how to behave around you) but his inability to have a normal conversation with you - coupled with his lack of impulse control in having to follow you & keep track of where you are - are signs that he'll be a major headache to deal with.
Interestingly enough, you didn't mention at all whether or not you like him. You started your post by making it clear that you're already seeing someone, which indicates to me you have feelings for "James". Whether you do or you don't, something isn't right with this relationship you have with him, and I'd keep my distance. If his behavior intensifies Id seriously consider talking to HR.
The first sentence of my post says "I'm not interested in any of my coworkers " I don't like him the way he acts just throws me off1 -
How do you feel about small talk at the gym ??8
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Motorsheen wrote: »How do you feel about small talk at the gym ??
I don't talk to anyone at the gym sadly
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I'm confused because the second poster made it seem like he was stalking you. Is that your concern? Or are you asking if he's flirting?0
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JukeboxHeroine wrote: »I'm confused because the second poster made it seem like he was stalking you. Is that your concern? Or are you asking if he's flirting?
More of a "is he flirting" so I can put an end to it ... I have my eyes on someone I'm dating
and I don't want him to get the wrong idea 2 -
Ok - but you might have a bigger problem on your hands than simply putting an end to some unwanted flirtation. Just be careful with "James"...3
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It sounds like he's flirting (poorly). I'm guessing at his intentions though, if you call him on it I'm sure he'd argue that he's just joking around.
I agree with the 1st reply that you should threaten to shoot him in self defence.6 -
The answer would be the same regardless of the situation. Just tell him you don't want him to get the wrong idea, you have someone else and you're not interested and you want to keep your relationship on a professional level. There's no need to embarass him at this point so do it in private and do it politely but firmly, no joking around or laughing or hinting that if you weren't with someone you'd date him etc.7
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He's jokingly flirting to see if you'll take the bait.3
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I see it as playful flirting. As someone who enjoys a good flirting opportunity, I wouldn't be too concerned. It sounds just playful to me. You might want to drop a hint you are seeing someone so he knows it's just playful fun.2
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ajthompson_5 wrote: »Hi, I am not one of the men on MFP. I am a 49 year old mom and grandmother. After reading your post I can't help but let you know that if I were in your position, the next time he approached me I would say, "Stop, before you say another word," and I would hold up my phone, "I am going to record every word you say. I have had enough. You are freaking me out so please leave me alone. Another word and I am going to file harassment charges AND, if you decide to get upset and try something anywhere at anytime because you are angry, just a word of advice, I am always packing!" Then I would walk away and avoid him at all cost. Especially in the parking lot, especially if it is at night. Be smart.
Thanks hun
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JukeboxHeroine wrote: »I'm confused because the second poster made it seem like he was stalking you. Is that your concern? Or are you asking if he's flirting?
More of a "is he flirting" so I can put an end to it ... I have my eyes on someone I'm dating and I don't want him to get the wrong idea
yes, he's flirting....
next time you're chatting just drop into conversation that you're seeing someone.1 -
I honestly don't know why you two are not married already3
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Ahh to be young and naive. I miss those days. (not really)2
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You said you are currently seeing someone? Casually mention him the next time he hints at you two hanging or demanding to know where you are headed. Just laugh if he mentions glasses of water or smoking or something ridiculous and say you will have to get the ok from your boyfriend or "yeah, don't think my man will be kosher with that but hey, I'll ask to make sure!"
It will gently let him down and tell him that you aren't available at the time. If he tries to convince you to leave him, just tell him you are flattered but for now you are in a happy place.
I've dealt with both the complete creepy stalker and the socially inept. The stalker doesn't quit. He keeps pushing his agenda like a throw back cave man. Those types have zero respect for you. And when they ask "why did you leave " .. they mean it and want to train you to seek permission first. This guy sounds disturbing. I've never known a socially inept boy ask questions like that.. only the control freaks.
Please tell me you are one of those women that if a guy did get abusive, you aren't the boohoo cowering type. Take .. him.. out. Never let anyone bully you. You are an adult not a little girl anymore so don't let them control you like a parent.2 -
Well he's obviously flirting... even if he is joking, it's still flirting.
The real question is... Is he off putting.
However that's something that only you can answer... Sounds to me like he is off putting, just to aggressive.2 -
Not a guy. His "flirting" seems creepy to me and doesn't seem like you are having fun with it.
Does he know you are involved with someone and not interested? I'd make that clear right away.
I'd also make it clear that the behavior is making you uncomfortable and ask him to stop.
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Not a guy. His "flirting" seems creepy to me and doesn't seem like you are having fun with it.
Does he know you are involved with someone and not interested? I'd make that clear right away.
I'd also make it clear that the behavior is making you uncomfortable and ask him to stop.
No he doesn't know but I wanted to say something without coming off as rude or anything0 -
Ok - but you might have a bigger problem on your hands than simply putting an end to some unwanted flirtation. Just be careful with "James"...Ahh to be young and naive. I miss those days. (not really)Cerealsensei wrote: »He's jokingly flirting to see if you'll take the bait.JohnnyPenso wrote: »The answer would be the same regardless of the situation. Just tell him you don't want him to get the wrong idea, you have someone else and you're not interested and you want to keep your relationship on a professional level. There's no need to embarass him at this point so do it in private and do it politely but firmly, no joking around or laughing or hinting that if you weren't with someone you'd date him etc.ClubSilencio wrote: »LMAO. Esteemed MFP gentleman here.
It's both. He has nothing to lose; he's at work trying to entertain himself and make the time pass easier. But if you take him up on his offer, he's one step closer to the knickers. It's whatevs to him.ajthompson_5 wrote: »Hi, I am not one of the men on MFP. I am a 49 year old mom and grandmother. After reading your post I can't help but let you know that if I were in your position, the next time he approached me I would say, "Stop, before you say another word," and I would hold up my phone, "I am going to record every word you say. I have had enough. You are freaking me out so please leave me alone. Another word and I am going to file harassment charges AND, if you decide to get upset and try something anywhere at anytime because you are angry, just a word of advice, I am always packing!" Then I would walk away and avoid him at all cost. Especially in the parking lot, especially if it is at night. Be smart.
Thanks for all of the answers you guys!! 1 -
Not a guy. His "flirting" seems creepy to me and doesn't seem like you are having fun with it.
Does he know you are involved with someone and not interested? I'd make that clear right away.
I'd also make it clear that the behavior is making you uncomfortable and ask him to stop.
No he doesn't know but I wanted to say something without coming off as rude or anything
You could attempt to casually throw it into a conversation. Like, the weekend is coming up so if he asks you what your plans are you could say, "my bf and I are going to ______."
Thank u good idea0 -
Sounds like he's flirting.1
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