Isn't he overreacting?

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Replies

  • Theo166
    Theo166 Posts: 2,564 Member
    This guy has been your friend for many years, and it's not a dating relationship, so advice to run away seems inappropriate. Friends aren't always rational and I read hurt feelings. Maybe he's got some other stuff going on in his life, which is why he reached out to an old friend?

    Old friendships do require a bit of nurturing to remain alive. If you want to keep the friendship, put some effort into it.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Theo166 wrote: »
    This guy has been your friend for many years, and it's not a dating relationship, so advice to run away seems inappropriate. Friends aren't always rational and I read hurt feelings. Maybe he's got some other stuff going on in his life, which is why he reached out to an old friend?

    Old friendships do require a bit of nurturing to remain alive. If you want to keep the friendship, put some effort into it.

    I reached out to see him that's why I don't understand where his attitude was from
  • kwph
    kwph Posts: 7,375 Member
    Ignore him & see if he straightens up ...But that's childish *kitten* I'm hearing ..Unless he's ur child who has time 4 that nonsense
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    edited February 2017
    kwph wrote: »
    Ignore him & see if he straightens up ...But that's childish *kitten* I'm hearing ..Unless he's ur child who has time 4 that nonsense

    He's definitely not my child lol
  • kwph
    kwph Posts: 7,375 Member
    Then ya just answered ur own question
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    138shades wrote: »
    sounds to me like you are the one that keeps the conversation going or alive.....you can end communication etc nowadays.


    What do u mean
  • LiftingRiot
    LiftingRiot Posts: 6,946 Member
    It means we need to hear his side of the story.... Because there is some common sense resolutions to this. The way you put everything makes him sound like a psycho yet it seems like you're kind of digging it and holding on.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Have you heard from him since?
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    LiftingRiot wrote: »
    It means we need to hear his side of the story.... Because there is some common sense resolutions to this. The way you put everything makes him sound like a psycho yet it seems like you're kind of digging it and holding on.

    Digging what? Hmm I don't understand what you mean
  • LiftingRiot
    LiftingRiot Posts: 6,946 Member
    it means that the way you put everything to us from your side of the story, its obvious he is overreacting, so you shouldn't even have to pose the question in a public forum like this. However you do post it here either for attention in itself or there is another side of the story (his side) which can fill in why your so confused about this situation. Possibly that you were leading him on or that you like the attention he is giving you.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    TavistockToad wrote: »
    Have you heard from him since?
    No lol
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    LiftingRiot wrote: »
    it means that the way you put everything to us from your side of the story, its obvious he is overreacting, so you shouldn't even have to pose the question in a public forum like this. However you do post it here either for attention in itself or there is another side of the story (his side) which can fill in why your so confused about this situation. Possibly that you were leading him on or that you like the attention he is giving you.


    Well honestly he gives me no attention , but this is exactly honestly what happened so for him to get overly upset puzzled me
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    This is a whole lot of over analyzing. Either discuss it with him and figure it out, or cut ties and move along. There's no rule book stating that you need to keep clingy friends.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    WeepingAngel81 wrote: »
    This is a whole lot of over analyzing. Either discuss it with him and figure it out, or cut ties and move along. There's no rule book stating that you need to keep clingy friends.

    Thankyou
  • kwph
    kwph Posts: 7,375 Member
    Ya know what ya do ...Just put ur arm way up in the air & then start waving ....."Good bye .....,Good bye ....." (Done!)
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    So nice of him to remind you why you stopped talking to him to begin with!
  • JeanieWww
    JeanieWww Posts: 4,037 Member
    Sounds to me, like he was really hoping to have a relationship with you and felt you totally blew him off. From your comments to him, you sound like you aren't interested. I don't think he over reacted, for someone who had feelings involved. I do agree that you should have your antenna up though.
    Let me make a few points:
    you said he could come over if you weren't busy when you got off of work. But you forgot (because it wasn't important to you since you don't have the same feelings) and didn't text him back. He was obviously disappointed and wanted to know if you were blowing him off, by asking for clarification of WHY you didn't get together after work. I will add, it would have been considerate to have not forgotten or texted and I'm sorry, I forgot. That at least shows you care about his feelings.
    When he texts later and gets snarky because you aren't responding fast enough or at all, part of that sounds a bit controlling, which can turn into an abuser later one. Can doesn't mean "will", but the predisposition is there.
    If he's called many many times, he's either very interested in you, or has become obsessed. If you lie about getting his texts or calls, well, that's enough to upset someone. If you don't return them at the end of the day after work, well, it's a blow off, and rather chicken *kitten*, too. If you aren't interested in him for more than a friend, let him know. If you're both cool with just being friends, he needs to tell you that too, so you aren't wondering.
    Sorry dear, as far as him hanging up, well, you do seem a bit inconsiderate when it comes to communication etiquette. You might at least offer an apology as well as let him know how you feel, and take a moment to stop and think of how your actions could make him feel. His has made you feel something, so yours will make him feel too. Then, ask yourself how you would feel if someone did the same to you. Maybe you wouldn't care as much, but you'd still care.
  • bluecrush84
    bluecrush84 Posts: 77 Member
    He hung up on you...serious lack of respect....red flag...sounds like he is testing the waters of abuse...seeing how much you will let him push you around...next time it will be a rough yank of your arm, or throwing you in the car in a fit of jealous rage.

    Save yourself the abuse and stop talking to this guy.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    So nice of him to remind you why you stopped talking to him to begin with!
    bluecrush84 wrote: »
    He hung up on you...serious lack of respect....red flag...sounds like he is testing the waters of abuse...seeing how much you will let him push you around...next time it will be a rough yank of your arm, or throwing you in the car in a fit of jealous rage.

    Save yourself the abuse and stop talking to this guy.

    Thanks guys you're right
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    JeanieWww wrote: »
    Sounds to me, like he was really hoping to have a relationship with you and felt you totally blew him off. From your comments to him, you sound like you aren't interested. I don't think he over reacted, for someone who had feelings involved. I do agree that you should have your antenna up though.
    Let me make a few points:
    you said he could come over if you weren't busy when you got off of work. But you forgot (because it wasn't important to you since you don't have the same feelings) and didn't text him back. He was obviously disappointed and wanted to know if you were blowing him off, by asking for clarification of WHY you didn't get together after work. I will add, it would have been considerate to have not forgotten or texted and I'm sorry, I forgot. That at least shows you care about his feelings.
    When he texts later and gets snarky because you aren't responding fast enough or at all, part of that sounds a bit controlling, which can turn into an abuser later one. Can doesn't mean "will", but the predisposition is there.
    If he's called many many times, he's either very interested in you, or has become obsessed. If you lie about getting his texts or calls, well, that's enough to upset someone. If you don't return them at the end of the day after work, well, it's a blow off, and rather chicken *kitten*, too. If you aren't interested in him for more than a friend, let him know. If you're both cool with just being friends, he needs to tell you that too, so you aren't wondering.
    Sorry dear, as far as him hanging up, well, you do seem a bit inconsiderate when it comes to communication etiquette. You might at least offer an apology as well as let him know how you feel, and take a moment to stop and think of how your actions could make him feel. His has made you feel something, so yours will make him feel too. Then, ask yourself how you would feel if someone did the same to you. Maybe you wouldn't care as much, but you'd still care.



    I see thankyou

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