Obese but still see yourself thin?

mkcongrove1

I've always heard about people who lose 100+ lbs but always see their "fat self" when they look in the mirror. But for about a year I always saw the skinny me even though I had gained 75lbs. I think part of that was because of all the weight I gained so quickly during my pregnancy and then the depression that I struggled through after losing my son. I started MFP not because of a number on the scale but because I finally saw how obese I had become when I looked in the mirror for the first time a couple of months ago and it was soul crushing. Just wondering if anyone else still sees their "skinny self" and if you do, are you as excited as me to recover them from the massive amount of fat you covered them with!!

xxnellie146xx

Me! When I first started I didn't see myself as big as I was, until I saw a certain picture and didn't even recognize myself. Now that I have lost a lot of weight, I look at myself and see myself as a lot bigger than I am. Current pictures of me, don't match what I see in the mirror. It's a constant struggle. I guess my mind will catch up eventually.

dandelyon

I was definitely in denial about how much weight I had put on. I even told myself I just wasn't photogenic (and I'm not.. But I'm pretty sure the camera doesn't add *50* extra pounds). It took a picture of myself with two chins and I was signed up for mfp and had thrown away all the crap snacks in the house.

ViktoryaC

This this totally this. I was 110 pounds from age 16 to 30. Then in one year, I've gained 50 pounds and 12 inches on my waist. I still think (and eat!) like a skinny person, still see bikinis and mini skirts and think I'd look great in them....then I look down, see this belly that grew seemingly overnight, and want to cry! :sad: I'd always been the "hot" one...

theepervette

I've lost 80+ lbs and still see myself as a chubby chick, even though people say i'm "tiny"

looking back at photos from before I realized how big I was.. when i was bigger I never felt THAT big.

jdhoward_101

This used to be me! I remember going in to a dress shop to try and find a dress for my year 13 ball, (some years ago now!) and the only dress that would fit me was a size 18. I remember thinking that couldn't be right, there was no way i was a size 18, that was ridiculous, as i definitely didn't see myself as a size 18! I remember looking at photos of me and thinking there was no way i was that big, i was clearly just wearing unflattering clothes or it was a bad camera angle. Even looking in the mirror, i just couldn't see myself the way i looked in photos.

Since then i've lost several stone and am down to a size 8, but lo and behold i don't see myself as skinny; maybe it was from all those years of being overweight, or maybe because i am aware of how skewed my perception of my physical self was, but i still see the overweight person i one day realized i was.

Sods law really

monjacq1964

I've lost 130 lbs. I kind of thought i looked like i do right now. I'd get a HUGE shock whenever i caught a glimpse of myself in a store window or full length mirror. I call it reverse anorexia. I always avoided mirrors as much as possible, or even looking at my naked body. It's weird.

I don't feel "thin" now, i see the extra skin on my belly and wish it was gone.

hafbreed02

This might seem strange, but if you enjoy reading....look for "Psycho Cybernetics" by Maxwell Maltz.....it addresses what you are referring to........"SEEING YOURSELF" a certain way. He was an amazing plastic surgeon that figured out why some people......."saw their scars", even after they had healed and the scars were gone...A BIG PART OF FITNESS IS "MENTAL"

MelissaL582

For the longest time I would see myself smaller than what I truly looked like. I would compare myself to people bigger than me and think to myself.."I'm not that big, so I don't have nothing to worry about". Boy, was I wrong..my whole way of thinking was disgusting and brought me up to 237lbs. I'm 200.8 lbs as of today and I now see myself as a bigger person with a smaller face. It will be interesting to see how I will feel once I reach my ultimate goal.

hkmurphy83

I've lost 80+ lbs and still see myself as a chubby chick, even though people say i'm "tiny"

looking back at photos from before I realized how big I was.. when i was bigger I never felt THAT big.

THIS^^^^

I knew I was big when I was at my heaviest, but I've been looking back from pictures from a few years ago (pictures that I used to think were flattering), and now I think "I was that big??? Why couldn't I see it???"

Now I'm scarily close to goal, and all I can see are flaws when I look in the mirror i.e. areas of fat that still jiggle too much, not enough definition in the muscles that I'm working on, etc. Then I run into people, and they tell me I'm tiny and ask when I'm going to stop losing. I am really struggling with the changes that have taken place over the past year.

ames105

I've been like this for years!! I don't like having pictures taken because I can see how big I am. But, when I look in the mirror, I still see a thin person...or a much thinner person than is really there.

Now that I've lost 50lbs, I think the image I see in the mirror is catching up with the image I see in my head. I still don't like having pics taken because I'm still bigger than I think. Its funny how the mind works.

KenosFeoh

Not really, although I did have the shock a couple of years ago of taking my measurements to order a new swimming suit, and the size I needed was 22W. WTF! OMG! I had no idea. I'd gained weight slowly enough that most of my clothes just got stretched out with me.

blondageh

I've been like this for years!! I don't like having pictures taken because I can see how big I am. But, when I look in the mirror, I still see a thin person...or a much thinner person than is really there.

Now that I've lost 50lbs, I think the image I see in the mirror is catching up with the image I see in my head. I still don't like having pics taken because I'm still bigger than I think. Its funny how the mind works.

^^^^

This is ME exactly! I went from not even being able to look in a mirror to now being able to look in the mirror but not being able to have my pictures taken because they look like the girl who couldn't look in the mirror a few months ago. So yeah, I am still a lot bigger than I want to let myself realize. I think I look decent until I have my picture taken and then I am so disgusted I am ruined for a few days.

marilynx

I can really relate to this topic. When I was in high school I fluctuated between 160-170 pounds. This may seem heavy to some, but I didn't look that heavy. Plus I always liked the "thick girl" look, I think partly cause that was what was considered attractive when I was in high school. When I got to college I gained about 45 pounds, but always tried to squeeze into my smalle clothes, blaming bloat and our school's crappy laundry machines for the reason why I couldn't fit my clothes. Now I realize that my gut is really there, the back fat really exists, and my "Beyonce booty" isn't quite as bodacious as it once was. So now I'm working on it. The funny thing is I still see myself as thick, until I look at my stomach and go, yeeeaaah, I'm tired of this annoying pooch.

missa482

I definitely see the skinny me in the mirror and its not until I look at pictures that someone has taken that I realize I look nothing like I think I do.

mgirard447

This is so me. Thought I was the only one. I see myself in the mirror and deal with it cause I don't think I am that big and then I will see a picture and its like ... what the heck.. its so frustrating!

TheDoctorDana

Me! I lived in denial until someone posted a picture of me on Facebook. I didn't recognize the person in the picture. It was me! :sad: I was horrified. I worry that not seeing myself as HUGE in the mirror will mess up my weight loss.

marilynx

I can really relate to this topic. When I was in high school I fluctuated between 160-170 pounds. This may seem heavy to some, but I didn't look that heavy. Plus I always liked the "thick girl" look, I think partly cause that was what was considered attractive when I was in high school. When I got to college I gained about 45 pounds, but always tried to squeeze into my smalle clothes, blaming bloat and our school's crappy laundry machines for the reason why I couldn't fit my clothes. Now I realize that my gut is really there, the back fat really exists, and my "Beyonce booty" isn't quite as bodacious as it once was. So now I'm working on it. The funny thing is I still see myself as thick, until I look at my stomach and go, yeeeaaah, I'm tired of this annoying pooch.

RCottonRPh

I'm the opposite. I am 4 pounds away from being just "overweight" but after losing 40+ pounds, I feel as big as ever. This journey has made me focus more on my body and let's just say I haven't recovered from hating it. I'm really stuck on what still is wrong (saggy boobs, stretch marks, enormous thighs) instead of embracing the improvements--my boobs have shrunk (which is great since I was a DDD and they were uncomfortable), I'm down 2 pant sizes and 2 shirt sizes. I'm hoping that someday after I've done lots more work I can look in the mirror and be happy with my body.

JDHINAZ

So me!!! And, again, it was a picture taken of me that really knocked me into reality. In fact, I probably should start taking pictures every month, just so I have a real frame of reference.

So glad I'm not alone!!

pbrahan

Totally me. I would look in the mirror and see myself as thin. Then I didn't know who the fat lady in the pictures was. I'm getting back to looking like myself now and it sure is nice.

greenmm25

I've always done the whole I am not that bad, or that big until I see a picture of myself. I still feel like I should only weigh like 180 (over weight but not this big) but the scale says over 200 and that just doesn't match.

jezy_jass

I still do from time to time. I'll put on an outfit to go out in and think it looks great, but then when I see pictures from that day/night with that same outfit on it is NOT pretty. Doesn't happen all the time, just every now and again. Not sure if that means I am still in semi-denial?

jadeowen91

I am completely the same. I started using MFP a long time ago and lost lots of weight then became more sporadic. Not long after I got depressed and gained lots of weight. I didn't notice and continued wearing my 'skinny clothes' until I saw some photos and couldn't believe how big i'd gotten! Today is my first day back on and I'm more determined than ever to lose the extra weight! I need to lose around 40 or 50lbs so I can get back into my skinny clothes (which I have packed into a suitcase and put in the loft)! It's great to see how supportive everyone is though and how well everyone has done with their weight loss it really gives me hope

reneeisnowhere

Yes! This is what I have been thinking! I was the tall skinny girl who lifted weights until I was 25. Then, I married an obese man who constantly struggles with his weight. Add on kids and a stressful job, then major depression and WHAM! who is that girl? yesterday I went through my pictures and realized that I haven't taken a full body shot in over 4 years! (Or maybe only a few) I can see the pounds add on. Now I am taking pictures to record those pounds coming off.

My mom always thought she was fat when I was growing up (5'6" and 125)<eye roll>. I wonder if that affects the way I perceive myself?

ethompso0105

I really needed to see this today...I'm glad I'm not alone in this!

You so often read about people who think they're fat when they're really skinny...I felt so strange (and almost conceited) feeling the opposite way. I can't even begin to describe the shame I feel when I look at myself in a full-length mirror or see a picture of myself.

Once, for a dance rehearsal for a show I was in, I wore a pair of leggings and a longer shirt with my dance shoes. I felt soooooo good about my outfit and loved how I felt. In my mind, I looked like a curvy dancer. Then the pictures came out and I saw rolls where I didn't realize I had some. So depressing. Hopefully my body will catch up with my mind someday!

EyeOTS

This was totally me.
I was in major denial that I was ever 295 pounds. I always visualized I was more like 250. That made it harder to see early weight loss as a success (because the total was still over what I thought it should be).

SrJoben

I've never been obese. But I do have a few pounds of fat to lose.

I still thought of myself as thin somehow even when I had to go up a size or two in pants.
I still thought of myself as strong even as lack of activity whittled away at my muscles.
(Health problems and trying to start my own business took all my attention for several years)

One visit my doctor just said point blank something along the lines of 'You're overweight.'
I was startled. I said surely around 200 pounds isn't too bad for a six foot tall man.
She said 'It is for your activity level.'

That was a wakeup call. I used to really wonder how obese people let themselves get like that. I'm still a little amazed it gets as far as it does for many people. But I guess I understand how it works now. Your attention is elsewhere, your self image isn't updating.

ChiefWaha

I've never had a skinny self, even before I started grade school, so I never really see myself that way. I was always the biggest guy in the room. Now that I've lost some of my extra weight, my hardest part to realize is I'm not the fattest guy in the room anymore. It still startles me every time I realize it.

venturaroo

I honestly have no concept of what I looked like at my heaviest and I spend a lot of time now confronting the mirror. I make my daughter stand next to me so I can see the difference (not that I will ever be her size 2). I often think I look thinner than I am but want to be real with myself so I don't get complacent and stop working on losing more (habit with me). And yes when I did lose weight before I passed many a mirror and would not know the person looking back at me. This journey is a huge mental process.

sevsmom

My sister is obese. At my worst, I've been mildly overweight. I remember the day when she looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, 'I don't know what you see when you look in the mirror, but when I look in the mirror...I see you.'

Now, we don't look alike. She's brunette, I have ashe "blonde" hair. She's shorter than I am. We don't look like sisters until you stand by us having a conversation...our mannerisms and way we speak are very similar.

She was refering to the fact that she does not see an overweight woman when she looked in the mirror.

We are about 20 years older now, but I remember that clear as day. She's even heavier now, and I always hope that she'll make lifestyle changes before her weight catches up with her. I know it's an emotional drain on her already.