Resturant Tug of War...SOS

dwendling63

On occassion I go out to eat with family or friends and am questioned..."what can you eat?"...truth of the matter, I can eat whatever I want! The word "eat" is defined as placing food in your mouth, chewing it up and swallowing it. So, technically, I can chew and swallow anything on the menu. But, just like those whom I dine with, I like to be seated first, then look at the menu and lastly make a choice when the waitress asks me what I would like to order. I understand I am on a diet and that my choices may be limited...but, the scruitany drives me crazy! To me being out with friends or family is not about the experience of dinning but about enjoying the time spent together. It even upsets my boyfriend if I do not choose to eat anything other than a house salad and a large glass of water or a cup of coffee. I don't understand why this upsets others so much. I do not get angry over others choice of food. The mood changes as if I have ruined dinner or dinner plans due to my choice of the menu. I don't feel it is a waste of time to spend time with others...so, why is it so upset over what I choose to consume? Many times I plan ahead and choose to eat something prior to going out or will top off the salad ordered when I get home with a wise choice food that fits my plan better. I do not want to cheat on myself. No one else but me has to step on that scale. I am 5'0" and 50 years old. My hormones and metabolism is not as easily menipulated as a mans...nor do I have the body mass, physical work strain and other factors to allow me to eat a 800+ cal dinner with a pitcher of beer to boot. I do better eatting 3 small meals and 3 snacks daily and enjoy my pitcher of water on the side. I love eatting clean. I enjoy exercise. I love the 27 pounds I have lost. Saddens me to be an annoyance to those that I love...because I won't fall off the wagon for them for even one meal. It is like peer pressure in a different way and it starts before we even get in the car to drive to go out. "What can you eat?"..."Where can we go?"..."Am I going to pay $8.00 for you to eat a $2.00 salad again?" ..."You can have salad at home, don't you want to eat something different?"...ughhh! So fustrating!!! And I know he is fustrated,too!!! And friends become apologetic because of the menu and my lifestyle. It is not there fault. If I am not upset about it , why the PITTY! Any thoughts out there on what can help me with this tug of war over eatting out?

sgtstef

Hello there! I say good for you to stick to it and stay focused!!

What I like to do is let the "hungry/non-limited people" choose. I always find something on the menu that suits me (even if I have a little cheat moment).

stealthq

"What can you eat?"..."Where can we go?"..."Am I going to pay $8.00 for you to eat a $2.00 salad again?" ..."You can have salad at home, don't you want to eat something different?"

Well, there's why they are upset. They likely think that you're limiting their choices, 'wasting' money, and 'wasting' the opportunity of eating at a restaurant. Nothing you can do about that, other than tell them that you are happy to go wherever they'd like to eat. Even that might not work because they may conscientiously try to only go where they think you'll be happy.

What I do is just choose meal on the menu that suits what I want to eat and eat as much as I think fits in my macros. If I eat more, then I compensate the rest of the day or the next day. I don't try to eat 'clean', though, so that would be harder depending on the restaurants.

MarisaDLS2

Steak and Salad and Side are the perfect "Restaurant Meal".

Don't be afraid to be "high maintenance" at a restaurant.
If any restaurant balks at your requests,
that's a sign that they don't care about customer service
and do not deserve your business in the future.

Ask for a house salad with the steak, salad dressing on the side.

Order a steak,
ask that it not be cooked with or topped with butter
(as many restaurants do, to "finish" the meat with a glossy coat).
Eat half the steak,
take the rest home to eat later for lunch.

If starch/potato is offered,
ask if there are sauteed vegetables
or even fresh fruit that you can substitute.

This way you can limit caloric damage
while other people don't feel guilty
for eating higher caloric food around you.

TribeHokie

Do what makes you happy and if other people can't handle it then that is their problem. I find that by not telling people I am watching what I eat I can avoid these types of challenges. I'm sure if I went to a super nice restaurant and started asking for adjustments to all the courses I would get some funny looks, but that doesn't happen very often.

I'll second the "find something healthy or semi healthy to modify" answer if you feel bad about getting a salad or want to avoid the conversation.