Could use some moral support
elphie754
Posts: 7,574 Member
I recently just had a baby (yay!) but thanks to numerous complications, I've had some set backs. I had the baby march 9th and to date have lost 70lbs (not complaining) from 307 to 237. I know that is great progress and I should be excited and I am.
However..... I want to continue to lose. I have been weighing and measuring food as well as talking walks now that the weather is warmer. Before pregnancy I had started to zombies c25k program which I really want to restart, but currently can't. During pregnancy, I would swim, but currently can't do that either. It is extremely frustrating. The only thing I can really do is walk.
Even more frustrating is right now O can't get an accurate weight everyday (I used to weigh every day and log it). I can only really weigh 3x a week when visiting nurse gets here, which is late afternoon, so it won't even be that accurate.
See, my c-section wound reopened a week after. They had been packing it with packing gauze, but today my insurance finally approved an actual wound vac. It is portable, but kind of heavy and definitely limits me a bit (hard to pick up my daughter sometimes which devastates me). It also looks ridiculous-I have to carry it in like a shoulder bag with this thick tubing sticking out. It also has foam inside my actual wound which is why an accurate weight is hard to get except when dressing is being changed.
I know I sound like I am complaining, I'm just upset and frustrated so needed to write it down to people who understand. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled my daughter is okay and I'm the sick one, I'm just sick of being sick (especially since the pregnancy almost killed me).
Apologies on spelling in advance, I haven't had much sleep the last 2 days.
However..... I want to continue to lose. I have been weighing and measuring food as well as talking walks now that the weather is warmer. Before pregnancy I had started to zombies c25k program which I really want to restart, but currently can't. During pregnancy, I would swim, but currently can't do that either. It is extremely frustrating. The only thing I can really do is walk.
Even more frustrating is right now O can't get an accurate weight everyday (I used to weigh every day and log it). I can only really weigh 3x a week when visiting nurse gets here, which is late afternoon, so it won't even be that accurate.
See, my c-section wound reopened a week after. They had been packing it with packing gauze, but today my insurance finally approved an actual wound vac. It is portable, but kind of heavy and definitely limits me a bit (hard to pick up my daughter sometimes which devastates me). It also looks ridiculous-I have to carry it in like a shoulder bag with this thick tubing sticking out. It also has foam inside my actual wound which is why an accurate weight is hard to get except when dressing is being changed.
I know I sound like I am complaining, I'm just upset and frustrated so needed to write it down to people who understand. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled my daughter is okay and I'm the sick one, I'm just sick of being sick (especially since the pregnancy almost killed me).
Apologies on spelling in advance, I haven't had much sleep the last 2 days.
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Replies
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Focus on healing, not on weight loss. If you are breast feeding stressing yourself out could cause problems. Seriously, you just don't need to be exercising if you have an open wound and you don't need to be worrying about your weight currently. When you are healed and released to be active then get back to it. The more you try to jump back in the longer it could take you to heal.23
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Focus on healing, not on weight loss. If you are breast feeding stressing yourself out could cause problems. Seriously, you just don't need to be exercising if you have an open wound and you don't need to be worrying about your weight currently. When you are healed and released to be active then get back to it. The more you try to jump back in the longer it could take you to heal.
This. You have had a really hard journey. Give yourself the time to not only physically heal, but mentally as well. It's going to be hard to be patient, but you don't want to chance disrupting your body's ability to heal at this time, especially with so much going on.
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Focus on healing, not on weight loss. If you are breast feeding stressing yourself out could cause problems. Seriously, you just don't need to be exercising if you have an open wound and you don't need to be worrying about your weight currently. When you are healed and released to be active then get back to it. The more you try to jump back in the longer it could take you to heal.
Doctor actually said that exercise and weight loss will actually help (especially since I am still dealing with high blood pressure.) Unfortnately I had to give up breast feeding after two weeks because the new b/p medication is not good for baby.
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Focus on healing, not on weight loss. If you are breast feeding stressing yourself out could cause problems. Seriously, you just don't need to be exercising if you have an open wound and you don't need to be worrying about your weight currently. When you are healed and released to be active then get back to it. The more you try to jump back in the longer it could take you to heal.
Doctor actually said that exercise and weight loss will actually help (especially since I am still dealing with high blood pressure.) Unfortnately I had to give up breast feeding after two weeks because the new b/p medication is not good for baby.
Your doctor said exercising with an open wound is okay?0 -
Focus on healing, not on weight loss. If you are breast feeding stressing yourself out could cause problems. Seriously, you just don't need to be exercising if you have an open wound and you don't need to be worrying about your weight currently. When you are healed and released to be active then get back to it. The more you try to jump back in the longer it could take you to heal.
Doctor actually said that exercise and weight loss will actually help (especially since I am still dealing with high blood pressure.) Unfortnately I had to give up breast feeding after two weeks because the new b/p medication is not good for baby.
Your doctor said exercising with an open wound is okay?
Only approved for light walking, but yes, OB, primary and wound care specialist have all said it is okay. But like I said, only walking and only lifting the equivalent of baby plus car seat. No stretching, no yoga, no swimming, no excessive bending etc.
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get yourself well and then go back after it. you can do it0
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Congrats on your healthy baby girl!
Right now healing should be your priority.
In the meantime, walking is great. It can at least help prevent you from gaining weight. Once your c section is doing better you can focus on losing more weight.
Good luck!0 -
HeatherB2612 wrote: »Congrats on your healthy baby girl!
Right now healing should be your priority.
In the meantime, walking is great. It can at least help prevent you from gaining weight. Once your c section is doing better you can focus on losing more weight.
Good luck!
Thank you. With the new wound vac I should be healed by May which is what I'm hoping for.0 -
Yes sometimes they will intentionally leave wounds open now, (or if they spontaneously open) to prevent infection. My mother had a huge open abdominal incision to be packed and kept wet for a few months, hers was delayed healing though due to malnourishment and immunosuppressants. Open wounds are freaky but medicine is discovering that open prevents internal abscesses and is actually better in a lot of cases. Look up delayed primary closure (only if interested).
The very best thing you can do is to focus on recovery. Eat well, nourish your healing body. Don't push yourself to be strict, just try to make more nutritious choices if and when you can. Getting enough protein will help with the wound healing and closure. But cutting calories will stress your body and will make healing and recovery slow. Picture 6 months from now. Would you rather be healed up in the first 3 months after taking care of yourself and have the last 3 months to lose some weight? Or would you rather have 6 months of recovery and be the same size putting your weight loss timeline even further away because you didn't honor your body when it was in a very vulnerable state?
Be gentle with yourself and if you want to walk and your doctor is ok with that then go for it. But this isn't the time for upping intensity or anything that is challenging.
Congrats on your baby!6 -
Nothing wrong with complaining, you've been through a lot and venting can be great. I agree with others, you should focus on healing and not worry about weight loss yet. You will have plenty of time to focus on losing weight once you're feeling better. It sounds like your attitude is great and you know the right things to do to lose weight, so once you're healed up, you'll already be off to a great start.0
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Mini_Medic wrote: »Yes sometimes they will intentionally leave wounds open now, (or if they spontaneously open) to prevent infection. My mother had a huge open abdominal incision to be packed and kept wet for a few months, hers was delayed healing though due to malnourishment and immunosuppressants. Open wounds are freaky but medicine is discovering that open prevents internal abscesses and is actually better in a lot of cases. Look up delayed primary closure (only if interested).
The very best thing you can do is to focus on recovery. Eat well, nourish your healing body. Don't push yourself to be strict, just try to make more nutritious choices if and when you can. Getting enough protein will help with the wound healing and closure. But cutting calories will stress your body and will make healing and recovery slow. Picture 6 months from now. Would you rather be healed up in the first 3 months after taking care of yourself and have the last 3 months to lose some weight? Or would you rather have 6 months of recovery and be the same size putting your weight loss timeline even further away because you didn't honor your body when it was in a very vulnerable state?
Be gentle with yourself and if you want to walk and your doctor is ok with that then go for it. But this isn't the time for upping intensity or anything that is challenging.
Congrats on your baby!
Thank you. Yes, it was closed but because of all the fluid build up (I had preeclampsia) it reopened. (Warning! Might be a bit graphic) I didn't even feel it open. I was just sitting on the edge of the tub taking and sponge bath when I looked down and saw I was gushing yellow fluid (honestly thought I was peeing for a minute). Because of all the fluid and infection, they didn't just stitch it back up. If they did, they could have caused an abdominal air or fluid pocket which would be even worse. It has already gone from 2inches deep by 1inch wide to 1inch deep and 1/4inch wide. Only thing slowing it down is infection (which I'm allergic to the antibiotics for). The wound vac is supppsed to promote healing with negative pressure and get all the nasty stuff out.0 -
I don't have advice - I don't have a lot of experience with this stuff.
But I do have hugs?0 -
It really is a case of taking care of yourself. I know you know that and are just frustrated and needed a vent.
big (((((
)))))) h.
You are doing a grand job.0 -
middlehaitch wrote: »It really is a case of taking care of yourself. I know you know that and are just frustrated and needed a vent.
big ((((( )))))) h.
You are doing a grand job.
Thank you1 -
Keep it gentle for now and don't stress too much on weighing yourself! As long as you are eating sensibly and logging that, leave the weight until you're all healed up. Or, if you really need to measure progress somehow (for your own satisfaction/motivation) use a tape measure on the bits that are not painful. You have been through a lot, just enjoy your daughter and just have some gentle walks in the fresh air. Big hugs!0
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I'm so sorry you're going through this. I won't ever forget the few weeks after I had my first baby. It was such a jarring transition, becoming a Mom, and I had had a perfectly healthy delivery so that wasn't even a factor. I'm so sorry. I know your doctor said that walking is OK for it, but I second the posters who say to take it easy. I think you should primarily focus on healing and enjoying your daughter. This precious new-baby time is going to be over in the blink of an eye. Rest and recover... there will be so much time to jump back into the game!0
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I'm so sorry you're going through this. I won't ever forget the few weeks after I had my first baby. It was such a jarring transition, becoming a Mom, and I had had a perfectly healthy delivery so that wasn't even a factor. I'm so sorry. I know your doctor said that walking is OK for it, but I second the posters who say to take it easy. I think you should primarily focus on healing and enjoying your daughter. This precious new-baby time is going to be over in the blink of an eye. Rest and recover... there will be so much time to jump back into the game!
I agree with this. Enjoy your baby. Everything else will fall in place.0 -
If there was infection they have to leave it open to let that heal because if they closed it they'd just be closing on the infection.
Your frustration is perfectly valid, hon, but take a step back and read what you're saying: you just had a baby and you have an open wound (which is perfectly normal), this is not a time to be pushing exercise and messing around with your calories. You should be eating at maintenance + a small bit extra to help your body to heal. Yes, this might add a bit more body fat but it should help to get you on your feet quicker. You're getting your exercise, you're a mom, you have 900 things to do for your baby every day so don't worry about that. Just get better and then figure out the weight loss thing.
This is such a short period in your life when you look at the whole of it and as raring to go as you are because of your previous success (whoo!), you really need to slow down and make sure you're okay. 0 -
So sorry you are having complications. I also had a c section last year but no problems with the incision. I still had to go easy on myself and limit exercise (i was a runner before). It took about 8 months before i felt completely comfortable with the scar (the numbness went away). Be patient, your body needs to heal. You don't need exercise to lose weight, especially since you can't exercise now, focus on your diet. This is 90% of success.0
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Thank you everyone. I know it is just a temporary set back, I'm just frustrated, especially since there is other stuff going on (my job is playing games, like terminating health insurance while out, but thankfully I have secondary insurance through my significant other).0
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Today it feels like everything got worse. Went to doctor, who changed the stupid wound vac and now it has a small air leak. All because he wanted to see the wound even though he had the lab cultures right in front of him that told him everything he needed to know. I want to scream.0
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I wish I had something positive to say that would make everything better. I don't.
Can the leak be fixed?
((( ))) h. 0 -
I know you've been through so much, and you don't deserve more medical complications with how many you've had both before and during your pregnancy. I only know you from observations on these boards but my sense is that you are a complex individual in body and mind... but additionally you are an amazingly strong and passionate individual. I have always respected your posts and your fortitude. It's this passion and strength that is motivating you to push yourself and be impatiently looking at the clock, the calendar, etc. I think some of that too has to do with your late term bed rest. You've been way too still for way too long with nothing to do but dream of the day your healthy baby girl is here and you can get back on your path to health and fitness too. So the rant is totally understandable and justified.
So now, let me share an observation and conclusion I've drawn about the general population on these boards, from my experience as a mother, a type A personality, and a veteran MFP member. In almost every aspect of our lives, we lament how quickly time passes. Especially motherhood. Just wait till that little girl starts hitting developmental milestones. "Slow down" you will think. "I can't believe you're already rolling over/sitting up/crawling/pulling up/walking.... ". You will whisper "I just want you to stay little". Even the average person thinks to themselves, "how can it already be almost summer? Where did the time go? It was just Christmas!" We constantly wish we had more time, we want things to slow down so we can enjoy them... in every aspect of our lives that is, except weight loss. For weight loss, for some reason, we want it as fast as possible. Even faster than is safe or reasonable for us to expect. We have no patience for things like injuries and setbacks and slow and steady weight loss...
But you know what Elphie? The time is going to pass whether you can walk pushing a stroller, jog, swim, or run away from pretend zombies. In the meantime, the best thing for your little girl is to have as many snuggles with her mom as you can give her. You are bummed you can't nurse her, and that would bum me out too. So instead, add extra cuddle time (skin to skin when possible) with her when you feed the bottles. The fitness goals will be there when your wound is healed. The weight will come back off. There will be a time in a year or so when your baby girl no longer lets you hold her and stare into her eyes memorizing her features. She will squirm and be just as passionate and determined as you are to be doing "things". So for now, while I totally empathize and support your frustration, I implore you to just take it easy, for just a little longer. You won't regret it, I promise.10 -
@WinoGelato, you are one caring woman. Well said, h. 2
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middlehaitch wrote: »
I wish I had something positive to say that would make everything better. I don't.
Can the leak be fixed?
((( ))) h.
We tried, but can't find exactly where it is.WinoGelato wrote: »I know you've been through so much, and you don't deserve more medical complications with how many you've had both before and during your pregnancy. I only know you from observations on these boards but my sense is that you are a complex individual in body and mind... but additionally you are an amazingly strong and passionate individual. I have always respected your posts and your fortitude. It's this passion and strength that is motivating you to push yourself and be impatiently looking at the clock, the calendar, etc. I think some of that too has to do with your late term bed rest. You've been way too still for way too long with nothing to do but dream of the day your healthy baby girl is here and you can get back on your path to health and fitness too. So the rant is totally understandable and justified.
So now, let me share an observation and conclusion I've drawn about the general population on these boards, from my experience as a mother, a type A personality, and a veteran MFP member. In almost every aspect of our lives, we lament how quickly time passes. Especially motherhood. Just wait till that little girl starts hitting developmental milestones. "Slow down" you will think. "I can't believe you're already rolling over/sitting up/crawling/pulling up/walking.... ". You will whisper "I just want you to stay little". Even the average person thinks to themselves, "how can it already be almost summer? Where did the time go? It was just Christmas!" We constantly wish we had more time, we want things to slow down so we can enjoy them... in every aspect of our lives that is, except weight loss. For weight loss, for some reason, we want it as fast as possible. Even faster than is safe or reasonable for us to expect. We have no patience for things like injuries and setbacks and slow and steady weight loss...
But you know what Elphie? The time is going to pass whether you can walk pushing a stroller, jog, swim, or run away from pretend zombies. In the meantime, the best thing for your little girl is to have as many snuggles with her mom as you can give her. You are bummed you can't nurse her, and that would bum me out too. So instead, add extra cuddle time (skin to skin when possible) with her when you feed the bottles. The fitness goals will be there when your wound is healed. The weight will come back off. There will be a time in a year or so when your baby girl no longer lets you hold her and stare into her eyes memorizing her features. She will squirm and be just as passionate and determined as you are to be doing "things". So for now, while I totally empathize and support your frustration, I implore you to just take it easy, for just a little longer. You won't regret it, I promise.
Thank you! I definitely needed to hear this. 1 -
Today it feels like everything got worse. Went to doctor, who changed the stupid wound vac and now it has a small air leak. All because he wanted to see the wound even though he had the lab cultures right in front of him that told him everything he needed to know. I want to scream.
The wounds vacs can do amazing things for healing, they are becoming much more common as well. I'm sorry you are going through all of this, but as others have said, take the time to rest and give your body the nutrition it needs. I know it's frustrating to be in a holding pattern, but the time will pass either way.0 -
What I would focus on is the stuff you can do. While you may want to do more than just walk, think about how much worse the situation would be if you couldn't even do that right now. If I were in your shoes I would take my baby in the stroller and spend time with her while you walk and recover. Maybe you could also take the time to focus on meal prep and eating well.
In general just remember why you started! Keeping that in the back of your mind will keep you motivated I promise. Don't let what limits you discourage your progress. Think ahead to better things
Good luck! You have an amazing community here to support you every step of the way.0 -
nutmegoreo wrote: »Today it feels like everything got worse. Went to doctor, who changed the stupid wound vac and now it has a small air leak. All because he wanted to see the wound even though he had the lab cultures right in front of him that told him everything he needed to know. I want to scream.
The wounds vacs can do amazing things for healing, they are becoming much more common as well. I'm sorry you are going through all of this, but as others have said, take the time to rest and give your body the nutrition it needs. I know it's frustrating to be in a holding pattern, but the time will pass either way.
I know they can, but right now, it hurts a lot, so doesn't quite feel worth it.
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nutmegoreo wrote: »Today it feels like everything got worse. Went to doctor, who changed the stupid wound vac and now it has a small air leak. All because he wanted to see the wound even though he had the lab cultures right in front of him that told him everything he needed to know. I want to scream.
The wounds vacs can do amazing things for healing, they are becoming much more common as well. I'm sorry you are going through all of this, but as others have said, take the time to rest and give your body the nutrition it needs. I know it's frustrating to be in a holding pattern, but the time will pass either way.
I know they can, but right now, it hurts a lot, so doesn't quite feel worth it.
I have heard this as well. I'm sorry, Elphie. I don't have much else to offer.
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