Why is he acting like I abandoned him ?

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trytpbme1
trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
in Chit-Chat
I told my friend Jared today that yesterday afternoon the guy that's been trying to get with me for awhile now asked for my number for the second time so this time I gave it to him but I didn't write my number down ,
I verbally gave him my number and he actually remembered it and texted me last night and he invited me tot he gym with him since we're both trying to lose weight .. and my guy friend said "well I hope he treats you right" and
I said "he isn't my boyfriend I just gave him my number" he also texted back and said "he isn't your boyfriend yet" and I didn't reply and he texted back "I guess you're not going to be texting me a lot anymore" and I texted back saying "you're my friend we're still going to talk" and he asked me "well why did you give him your number now and not the first time he asked ?"
I never said I was going to stop talking to him or neglect him. All I did was give the guy my number and now he's making me feel like I abandoned him.
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Replies

  • MarvinsAMartian
    MarvinsAMartian Posts: 236 Member
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    Ditto ^
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
    edited May 2017
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    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    [Image removed by MFP moderator]

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    edited May 2017
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.



    Thanks for answering I work with Jared lol and we're both 22 years old.

    usmcmp wrote: »
    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.



    Well to be honest he showed no signs of interest
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
    edited May 2017
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    trytpbme1 wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.



    Thanks for answering I work with Jared lol and we're both 22 years old.

    usmcmp wrote: »
    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.



    Well to be honest he showed no signs of interest

    You need to talk to him. Nobody except him can answer the question you are asking us.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    ^^ This, however.. if you talk to him about this and he continues to exhibit such behavior, you may have to realize that severing ties becomes the only option if you have no interest in him romantically and are sure you never will. I've had this problem with male friends before even when I had made my intentions or lack there of toward pursuing a relationship well known. You don't need the jealous passive aggressive behavior in your life, imo. It only leads to anxiety and stress later on, unfortunately.
  • bufnitzoiu
    bufnitzoiu Posts: 147 Member
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    I'm here for the drama!!:))
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    edited May 2017
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.

    How do you view a man who knows the female's feelings regarding him and yet continues to exhibit the behavior the OP is describing? Most of the time in my experience, I have not seen women I know doing what you describe. I'm sure it does happen, I just haven't seen it in my circles.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
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    OutOfUserName wrote: »
    jared is jealous and the bad part is he likes you but you only like him as a friend or you would have pick up on his jealousy already
    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    ^^ This, however.. if you talk to him about this and he continues to exhibit such behavior, you may have to realize that severing ties becomes the only option if you have no interest in him romantically and are sure you never will. I've had this problem with male friends before even when I had made my intentions or lack there of toward pursuing a relationship well known. You don't need the jealous passive aggressive behavior in your life, imo. It only leads to anxiety and stress later on, unfortunately.

    Thanks guys for the answers I will talk to him today
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
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    usmcmp wrote: »
    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    oyzeatwgxjo085dvpskbc5sqa3j4ds71alyocqhvyzheggik6tjwur3k6s5dwffa.jpg

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.

    How do you view a man who knows the female's feelings regarding him and yet continues to exhibit the behavior the OP is describing? Most of the time in my experience, I have not seen women I know doing what you describe. I'm sure it does happen, I just haven't seen it in my circles.

    If a woman has made it clear she isn't interested then a guy continuing to act jealous is childish and creepy, so severing ties as you suggested is the best move. From what the OP has said they haven't ever talked about it. The part about him asking why she didn't give the other dude her number the first time sounds protective and it could be because the new guy "wants to get with her" (I think that's teenager speak for have sex, but I'm too old for code words).

    That's kind of what I was thinking. You can be protective of friends you are loyal to, but it can sometimes still be construed as childish/jealous behavior. Talking is probably the best choice to prevent misunderstandings.

    Also.. is that what they call it these days? They go through so many code languages in a short time that it's hard for me to keep up.
  • ZodFit
    ZodFit Posts: 394 Member
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    Lol here is a picture of the dude when OP didn't have anything to write her number down but that dude is trying get with her.

    c7df541f89dc00ad61b49257c9a1fffa_meme-zach-galifianakis-math-memesuper-meme-zach-galifianakis-hangover-meme-math_640-360.jpeg

    Poor Jared he's probably in a tough spot working with you and all. Definite wants to be more than a friend though

  • JLAJ81
    JLAJ81 Posts: 2,477 Member
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    sxnk84bvf8x5.jpg
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,507 Member
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    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks wrote: »
    Did he get you some good deals at Subway?

    Subway bread contains HFCS


    plus....


    nwqci.jpg
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
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    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    Lol here is a picture of the dude when OP didn't have anything to write her number down but that dude is trying get with her.

    c7df541f89dc00ad61b49257c9a1fffa_meme-zach-galifianakis-math-memesuper-meme-zach-galifianakis-hangover-meme-math_640-360.jpeg

    Poor Jared he's probably in a tough spot working with you and all. Definite wants to be more than a friend though


    This made me laugh lol
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
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    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Kevoofthehoradrim wrote: »
    usmcmp wrote: »
    Your friend Jared likes you and doesn't know how to tell you. Or he's told you and you keep him in the friendzone. You need to actually sit down and talk to your friend like an adult. Unless you're under 18, and then you need to focus on school.

    oyzeatwgxjo085dvpskbc5sqa3j4ds71alyocqhvyzheggik6tjwur3k6s5dwffa.jpg

    That's an interesting point of view that is not at all related to how I see the "friendzone". To me, a woman who has seen this a lot in other women, friendzone is when a girl knows a guy friend is attracted and she purposefully strings him along because she enjoys the attention. There's a difference between that and a woman knowing a man is interested and having a reasonable discussion about where the relationship/friendship stands.

    How do you view a man who knows the female's feelings regarding him and yet continues to exhibit the behavior the OP is describing? Most of the time in my experience, I have not seen women I know doing what you describe. I'm sure it does happen, I just haven't seen it in my circles.

    If a woman has made it clear she isn't interested then a guy continuing to act jealous is childish and creepy, so severing ties as you suggested is the best move. From what the OP has said they haven't ever talked about it. The part about him asking why she didn't give the other dude her number the first time sounds protective and it could be because the new guy "wants to get with her" (I think that's teenager speak for have sex, but I'm too old for code words).

    That's kind of what I was thinking. You can be protective of friends you are loyal to, but it can sometimes still be construed as childish/jealous behavior. Talking is probably the best choice to prevent misunderstandings.

    Also.. is that what they call it these days? They go through so many code languages in a short time that it's hard for me to keep up.

    Thanks for answering
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
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    Jared sounds whiny. No one has time for that.
    Talk to him and tell him to stop whining.
  • tsortsor
    tsortsor Posts: 830 Member
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    Ironandwine69 wrote: »
    Jared sounds whiny. No one has time for that.
    Talk to him and tell him to stop whining.

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