What's your excuse and what are you going to do about it?

sporangia

Excuses, we've all had one. Excuses for not going to the gym, not eating right, not taking care of ourselves. I'm creating this thread as a place to unload that excuse and identify an action to overcome that excuse. If you had an excuse and successfully overcame it, please share how you were successful.

I'll start.

My excuse is fear. I am afraid that by dieting, I will set myself up for rebounding and gaining more weight than before. I'm afraid of what other people would say if I were as lean as I want to be. I am afraid of jealousy from my family and afraid of attention (my personality is more like wallflower than center stage). Fat has been my emotional security blanket.

My strategy is to reshape my outlook. I will be reminding myself of how my fat security blanket is harming my long-term health and limiting my life. I'm also going to define my goals as small pieces, rather than getting overwhelmed now about something that hasn't yet happened. I also try to reassure myself that the attention of being smaller will only last a while, not for the rest of my life. I look at images of fit people to help identify what my ultimate goal is. I'm also visualizing what it will feel like to be able to do the things in my life that I want to, without having my weight and size to hold me back.

So, what's your excuse and what are you going to do about it?

burntoutphilosopher

Powerful message sporangia ...


My excuse is That I eat the wrong stuff and way too much of it in social settings "to fit in". ...same with beer ... all my buddied are downing beer so I want to fit in.


To remedy it ... I have to dare to be different... and if they don't like the new me I'll have to find new friends. I have to realize that i am making myself BETTER... and real friends would support me in doing that.

MarvinsAMartian

Great mind sets guys.

My excuse WAS my breakup. I walked away from a nearly six year relationship with a girl I loved and cared for very much. Long story short, selfishness reared it's ugly head and I couldn't be a doormat for her hopes/dreams/aspirations anymore. I used heartbreak as an excuse to neglect myself, not eating or sleeping right and shutting myself away from the world.

What I did/am doing about it is changing how I view myself. I'm putting me first which has never been my strong suit and is honestly quite difficult. I'm focusing on what's next in life, even though I don't have a clue. Putting my mind to following my dreams instead of someone else's and putting myself out there again.

MFP has been a great outlet and I've met some amazing people with great stories.

hannajohnson1009

My excuse is I don't have time. I don't have time to make healthy food, I don't have time to exercise, I don't have time to meal prep.

I am a mom of 3 young boys and I work full time, so my time is tight - but I know if it is that important to me I can find it. I want to make this change for me and my boys.

I will not give out excuses any more. I will make time to work out- I will plan meals at work and no more fast food because I "don't have time to make dinner."

RelCanonical

I don't like to call them excuses. I feel like an excuse is something I should just dismiss. Reasons, though, I can tackle, work through, and become better not just in my health, but in other ways as well.

I have anxiety. It caused me to binge. Working on the anxiety instead of trying to dismiss the binge eating made it so I didn't have to fight the binge...it just doesn't bother me as much as it used to.

rsclause

Mine are scotch, wine & beer. Other than that I am a good boy.

sporangia

RelCanonical wrote: »

I don't like to call them excuses. I feel like an excuse is something I should just dismiss. Reasons, though, I can tackle, work through, and become better not just in my health, but in other ways as well.

I have anxiety. It caused me to binge. Working on the anxiety instead of trying to dismiss the binge eating made it so I didn't have to fight the binge...it just doesn't bother me as much as it used to.

Interesting point. I would like to suggest an alternative here. I think anxiety should not be viewed as an excuse. Although society likes to label things like depression and anxiety as excuses, I'd rather not. For this thread, an excuse is defined as a "false reason" for not achieving our weight/workout/lifestyle goals.

sporangia

hannajohnson1009 wrote: »

My excuse is I don't have time. I don't have time to make healthy food, I don't have time to exercise, I don't have time to meal prep.

I am a mom of 3 young boys and I work full time, so my time is tight - but I know if it is that important to me I can find it. I want to make this change for me and my boys.

I will not give out excuses any more. I will make time to work out- I will plan meals at work and no more fast food because I "don't have time to make dinner."

Yep. I've got the "too busy" excuse too. It's also very easy to start prioritizing other peoples' lives ahead of our own lives, especially when it comes to people we care for (ie. children and significant others).

sporangia

MarvinsAMartian wrote: »

Great mind sets guys.

My excuse WAS my breakup. I walked away from a nearly six year relationship with a girl I loved and cared for very much. Long story short, selfishness reared it's ugly head and I couldn't be a doormat for her hopes/dreams/aspirations anymore. I used heartbreak as an excuse to neglect myself, not eating or sleeping right and shutting myself away from the world.

What I did/am doing about it is changing how I view myself. I'm putting me first which has never been my strong suit and is honestly quite difficult. I'm focusing on what's next in life, even though I don't have a clue. Putting my mind to following my dreams instead of someone else's and putting myself out there again.

MFP has been a great outlet and I've met some amazing people with great stories.

Breaking up with someone is a major life change, akin to a death in the family. I wouldn't be surprised if the 5-stages of grief would apply to breakups too... not to mention a change in personal identity (ie. the "I" instead of "we").

I agree... the community aspect of MFP is a great outlet

sporangia

burntoutphilosopher wrote: »

Powerful message sporangia ...


My excuse is That I eat the wrong stuff and way too much of it in social settings "to fit in". ...same with beer ... all my buddied are downing beer so I want to fit in.


To remedy it ... I have to dare to be different... and if they don't like the new me I'll have to find new friends. I have to realize that i am making myself BETTER... and real friends would support me in doing that.

Has joining MFP been a way to create a new group of people you can identify with?

scubachick67

Love this thread!

I am working throgh ED recovery. Im in my 40s so my maladaptive behaviours and coping mechanisms (ie: excuses!) are ingrained and automatic. I am slowly recognising what I do and why.
My messed up head drives me to binge and also makes me too self conscious to exercise, even running alone on rural roads.

I have also used the excuse that my boobs are too big to fit into a good sports bra. Im wrecked tired by afternoon and just reach for junk food on the couch.

CSARdiver

Brilliant thread. For me quite simply I stopped making excuses and became keenly aware that most of the "reasons" people come up with are just that - excuses.

I used to make excuses and prioritizing work & family over health and found that when I neglected myself I did everything else quite poorly. I started focusing on the issues that matter - that 20% that really has impact. I let go of the 80% that does not matter. I applied this to every aspect of my life with great results.

burntoutphilosopher

sporangia wrote: »

...

Has joining MFP been a way to create a new group of people you can identify with?

I just started posting this weekend... so we'll see, I guess !

sporangia

CSARdiver wrote: »

Brilliant thread. For me quite simply I stopped making excuses and became keenly aware that most of the "reasons" people come up with are just that - excuses.

I used to make excuses and prioritizing work & family over health and found that when I neglected myself I did everything else quite poorly. I started focusing on the issues that matter - that 20% that really has impact. I let go of the 80% that does not matter. I applied this to every aspect of my life with great results.

Hey -- isn't there a book about that? Something like, "The 20 Percent"?

As I've gotten more responsibilities in work, the only thing I can do (because I can't do more) is to be more efficient and simplify my life. Still... work is a major excuse for me (ie. I need to get x project done tonight, so I can't workout).

mandy_godfree

My excuse was always that I didn't have enough time.

JetJaguar

My family. Between my wife, the kids, and the in-laws (who also live with us), there's always someone who needs me to do something for them, and it's a constant battle to get away to exercise. Even if I can get out for a bike ride or something, if some problem comes up while I'm away then it's my fault because I wasn't there to take care of it. It's a lot easier to just say *kitten* it and stay home, just in case.

My strategy was to try to get them on board with me, and they were for a few weeks, but I'm starting to get push back again. All I can do at this point is dig in my heels and fight.

sporangia

@JetJaguar -- fight hard! You can do it.

CSARdiver

sporangia wrote: »

CSARdiver wrote: »

Brilliant thread. For me quite simply I stopped making excuses and became keenly aware that most of the "reasons" people come up with are just that - excuses.

I used to make excuses and prioritizing work & family over health and found that when I neglected myself I did everything else quite poorly. I started focusing on the issues that matter - that 20% that really has impact. I let go of the 80% that does not matter. I applied this to every aspect of my life with great results.

Hey -- isn't there a book about that? Something like, "The 20 Percent"?

As I've gotten more responsibilities in work, the only thing I can do (because I can't do more) is to be more efficient and simplify my life. Still... work is a major excuse for me (ie. I need to get x project done tonight, so I can't workout).

This is the Pareto Principle - often applied in the business realm.

This is one of the most critical tasks one can do - prioritization. It is often the difference between failure and success.

JustDoIt0523

My "excuse" would be my emotions / view of myself / low self-efficacy. Sometimes I tell myself it's okay to overeat if I've had a rough day. I also just tend to have a negative view of how I look and use food as a coping mechanism. Perhaps most influential is the fact that I've fallen back into binge eating / have given in so many times, that I think I will never get to where I want to be. I lack patience.

MFP is certainly part of my action plan. Being mindful about what I put in my body is a huge piece and is really eye-opening. Exercise helps me not view my body as negatively, so that has also been helping. I'm setting lower expectations for how often & how long I exercise, which helps combat my all-or-nothing mentality.

Finally, I am relying on God's grace to change who I am. I know that God doesn't want me to be a slave to food / obsessed with my body. As Paul writes in Romans 6:17-18, "But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin ...You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness." I know I have been set free from idolizing food/my appearance, and if I rely on the Lord's help, I will overcome it. I am letting go of the shame I have held onto for a long time, and deciding to take it One. Day. At. A. Time. (Man, patience is hard, though!)

I look forward to the day when I can simply enjoy food appropriately (not out of emotions / boredom) and feel satisfied with who I see in the mirror.

mca90guitar

Think mine were pretty valid. Was working out and dropping alot and injured my shoulder which then turned into tendonitis. Couldn't lift anything heavy with that arms for months, jogging even hurt it.

That got good enough to start again and I injured my back, more time spent icing it and resting.

Back got better and I started working out again and then my brother and I hit a ice patch and hit the cement base that hold the signs on the highway. Totaled the car and my back,neck and shoulder flared up again.

Then this year more health issues that kepted me sitting out.

My eating I have no excuse for though, that I take full blame for. After all of the above I was just depressed, felt locked up in the house and just didn't care much anymore. Let myself go.

So back at it now, almost to the weight I left on before I injured my back. In it to win it this time. Still have to skip working out somedays but don't Bing eat horrible crap and make sure I just work harder the next workout and walk on lunch.

Niki_Fitz

My excuse is exhaustion and injuries. I have anemia, and three chronic joint injuries flared up since my last baby, and sometimes I feel that all the healthy things I do - supplements, greens, protein, avoiding sugar ups and downs, Pilates, yoga, massage, good sleep - just won't ever help me feel energized and healed up again. It's my excuse to not workout, to have a snack instead, to pour the glass of wine instead of the water.

I'm going to be more patient. I'm going to keep being consistent. I'm going to make a checklist of what works and then when I do have better days, I will look at it and see that the good habits DO work!

I will force myself to go straight to the gym or the trails or the basement where my weights are. No matter how exhausted I think I am, I am basically healthy and strong and I have to tell myself to just keep moving!

Thanks for the thread @sporangia, and for everyone's great replies!

moonstroller

My excuse was I'm happy being fat and lazy.

Angi_M

I've had a few excuses, it helps me study and get through homework. Not binging will only make me feel more stressed and I have to meet this deadline. Or I need to eat all the junk in the house so I can start fresh tomorrow, whether I am hungry or not.
I have unlocked my food diary and have told everyone my goals to try and stay focused. If school is getting too stressful, I take a break and breathe and walk.

Niki_Fitz

Today I made my list of activities that I know help my fatigue and injuries. I broke it all down. Starting today, I'll just check off that list and pay attention to how things feel. If I'm feeling better or worse I can look and see if my self-care, and my accountability with exercise and eating, is on track. I can look at it objectively and call on outside help or get some extra rest if needed. So that's what I've done about my exhausted-and-injured excuse! I'm gonna be checking in on here, I hope people keep posting.