What to do when you feel like giving up?

tiffany_yy

Hi I'm new here. My story is that about 2 years ago I made the decision to change myself and went through a successful weight loss journey. I was at my happiest and at my goal weight.
In the past year I have gotten really busy with a new job and such, and I was so engulfed in the whole feeling good about myself that I didn't pay attention to my eating habits and exercise regimen. I gained all the weight I lost and more (~40 lbs).
I started working out again regularly and watching my diet but just feel so discouraged. I'm so disappointed I let all my hard work go to waste and I feel like I'll never be able to do it again. Every time I have a good workout the next day I feel like I still gained weight. Its been about 2 weeks or regular workouts and dieting but I can't help but feel like theres no change. I feel trapped and like giving up.
What do you do when you feel like this and what helps you keep positive and motivated?

T0M_K

are you logging your food intake? what are you doing exactly?

JeromeBarry1

Really and truly, if I feel like giving up I dare myself to give up and do give up for a day. Then the next morning I wake up, rub my ribs, and say, 'Damn it, I'm not giving up.'

Numericmama373

I am staring up again really slowly. If I go too fast I will burn out and quit. Also, if I push too hard with exercising then my back will act up and I'll be derailed again.

In the first two weeks, I wouldn't expect too much. You are starting to exercise while also dieting. So you are most likely converting fat to muscle. Have you noticed your back is stronger? What about your butt or thighs?

I feel like I am losing back fat and my butt feels tighter, but when I look in the mirror I look the same. . So I won't be looking in the mirror for a while. My freaking period will bloat me out in a week or so and then I'm going to be really really frumpy.

Numericmama373

Can you find some non-scale goals? Like healthy breakfast every morning?

Out_of_Bubblegum

I tell myself:
Scale movement takes time... but that time will pass anyway, so might as well keep going.
Nothing will change unless I make it change.. giving up = no change, and I don't want to live like that anymore.

Remember that you've been there once before.. you KNOW you can do it.. you know HOW to do it... now you just have to do it.

T0M_K

Numericmama373 wrote: »

I am staring up again really slowly. If I go too fast I will burn out and quit. Also, if I push too hard with exercising then my back will act up and I'll be derailed again.

In the first two weeks, I wouldn't expect too much. You are starting to exercise while also dieting. So you are most likely converting fat to muscle. Have you noticed your back is stronger? What about your butt or thighs?

I feel like I am losing back fat and my butt feels tighter, but when I look in the mirror I look the same. . So I won't be looking in the mirror for a while. My freaking period will bloat me out in a week or so and then I'm going to be really really frumpy.

you don't convert fat to muscle or anything else. you lose fat. and if you're lucky while in a calorie deficit, you can maintain "most" of your lean muscle.

tiffany_yy

Right now I'm running 4 days a week and resistance training 2-3 times a week. As far as food I'm focusing on portion as its one of my biggest problems. I log my foods but I'm also not eating that often bc I'm so conscious. Rather than scale I'm hoping to have more noticeable changes which I understand will take time especially since I have gained a lot. I just wish I wouldn't get so discouraged and be able to be positive you know?

garydodwell

I am only a little way into my weight loss and better well being journey. The one thing I have learned so far is don't just base your progress on the numbers on the scale alone. Take measurements every 3-4 weeks. neck, chest, waist etc. i have only been doing this officially for about 6 weeks with some exercise ( mostly walking because i have bad knees ) and have lost 9 pounds. Changes in lifestyle will make a big improvement. Clothes are already beginning to fit better. an older notch on my belt is being used. I used to be a 30-40 a day smoker about 10 years ago and only my resolve to quit and stay quit has helped me to not reach for one again. The same bloody minded attitude has to be used to weight loss.
Don't give up. Never give up. do this for you and for those you love.

T0M_K

tiffany_yy wrote: »

Right now I'm running 4 days a week and resistance training 2-3 times a week. As far as food I'm focusing on portion as its one of my biggest problems. I log my foods but I'm also not eating that often bc I'm so conscious. Rather than scale I'm hoping to have more noticeable changes which I understand will take time especially since I have gained a lot. I just wish I wouldn't get so discouraged and be able to be positive you know?

No everyone has to log their food to find success. A couple things it does for you however it give you peace of mind knowing that the amount you are consuming is the right amount to reach your goals. its kind of heading out on a trip to a place you've not been and not using a GPS and going by a general sense of direction...you may get there using road signs and good navigation skills, but you may not or it may take you far longer and you've expended effort and didn't achieve your result. that bugs me personally.

this MFP app is designed to give you a calorie goal to hit based upon your body make up and your desired amount of weight loss per week. many times for people the decision to log accurately is the hardest hurdle to over come because they dig their heals in and just don't want to do it. its too hard..takes effort and is a pain in the *kitten*. That is not the case in reality and it gets easier as time goes on.

One alarming thing you said is your not eating the often...which is fine..eat once a day if you want, but do eat in the proper quantities so you don't burn out, get tired and give up. people eat so little at the start and they can't sustain that for long periods so they starting eating way to much later. Just some things to think about.

NewTnme

I usually give up and then I get upset with myself for doing it so. ☹️ This time I'm not giving up!!!! So you don't give up. We'll take 1 long day at a time and maybe set a goal for how much we should loose by August 13th? I'm willing to try if you are. Hey I'm gonna do that join me if you wish

lauracups

If I think about giving up I get naked and brush my teeth. If stuff is still jiggling about when I'm done brushing than I'm not done getting in shape; )
Truthful answer, I approach much of my routine with humor, so giving up isn't an option.

tiffany_yy

NewTnme wrote: »

I usually give up and then I get upset with myself for doing it so. ☹️ This time I'm not giving up!!!! So you don't give up. We'll take 1 long day at a time and maybe set a goal for how much we should loose by August 13th? I'm willing to try if you are. Hey I'm gonna do that join me if you wish

Funny because my goal date is actually around that time too. You're right every day is one step closer

88olds

It's quite possible that you do gain weight the day after a workout. Your muscles will retain water.

I stay positive because I believe in what I'm doing. It works for me. I depend on habit and, when tested, determination. I don't wait for motivation, it's not dependable.

You can't change the past. In fact, it no longer exists. All that's left are your ideas about the past. So now you know you can't take weight loss success for granted. Valuable information.

You need to believe in what you are doing. You have a cardio program and a strength training program. Good. You need to find a way to eat that supports your training that gives you a modest, livable calorie deficit. Keep making small adjustments until you get it. The only way to fail is to quit.

You need one more thing- time. It takes time to work. Nobody wants to allow for time. Don't let your own brain wreck your efforts.

sluggo1721

I remember two things the first is "The only workout you regret is the one you don't do." So even if its not the best workout it is still better then not working out at all. The second thing I learned is to make sure I eat every two hours or so. That way when you have your meals you are not super hungry and you can control your portions better. I started on 1-1-17 and have logged over 160 days straight. It was a pain in the beginning but I got used to it. I have lost 65 lbs and am only 5 lbs away from my goal weight of 230. When the scale is not moving as fast as I would like, I focus on my other gains. I have gone from barely being able to walk 1 mile to running 40 miles a week and I finished my first 12K. Just keep at it and you will see the results.

Moxie42

I've been feeling like giving up a lot recently. But I've done that in the past and just felt worse because when you don't try, you bring your chances of success to zero. I tell myself that even if I have bad days and binges and weight gains, as long as I try and never give up, there is hope and an opportunity for success.

I also ask myself what I would tell a friend. If they tried to do something (lose weight, quit cigs, etc.) and slipped up, would I tell them to not even bother trying because they made a mistake? Never. So why be so mean to myself?

Last but not least, patience. I struggle with that one big-time BUT when I get frustrated about not seeing results, I remind myself that it does take time, that weight loss isn't linear (gains are inevitable sometimes and that's okay) and that patience and determination to not give up are absolutely crucial to success.

Sorry you're feeling crappy but you are NOT alone in that feeling. I'd bet almost everyone who has lost weight has had days of disappointment and self-doubt. It's okay!

starfruit132

Find support with friends, MFP, WW, online buddy or a fitness coach if you feel like you need accountability. They will help you stay motivated until you gain some confidence back. Time will pass anyway, so take it one pound at a time until you see some results and success builds on itself. Stay strong!

ninerbuff

Giving up means quitting. And quitting NEVER resolves meeting your goals.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

tiffany_yy

I just wanna thank everyone so much. I was feeling extremely down and deprecating myself than my loved ones showed concern to the point they had to drag me out of this mood. I'm approaching this journey with a more optimistic mindset and reaching for long term goals from now on. I hope I and everyone else reaches their goal, whatever they may be

lifestyle70

I remember why I started, I think about consequences if I give up, I remind myself that change takes time and to take things one day at a time.

take2spicy

I lost 150 in 2009 regained some too...you just have to commit again I know it's hard...I'm down 44 since March when I decided enough is enough...feel free to add me if you need daily support and encouragement I'm active here & love to help.

nowine4me

I lost 70# in 2014 and gained it all back within a year. I've now lost 75#. The second time, I took it slow and really took the time to educate myself on nutrition. I'm feeling significantly more confident that I can maintain using all my new skills and tools.

Don't give up!

mrssie1223

@tiffany_yy Been there, done that a dozen times or more! LOL I think most of us here have. Don't get discouraged! Get determined! I started yoyoing after a weight loss of 86 lbs, so I decided to take control and shake things up. I started Keto, and have lost 15.6 lbs since June 2nd! No matter what you choose to do, make sure you shake things up. Don't stick to the same old routine. Your body gets used to it. That's when you start seeing less and less results for your effort. Also, be sure to measure yourself often. You can lose inches, even when you haven't lost pounds. Best of luck to you on your new journey! I know you can do it! Michelle

mrssie1223

@tiffany_yy PS: Add me as a friend, if you'd like. We are all here to help each other! Michelle