How to deal with frequent special occasions?

bionicpuffy

Hello MFPers!

Here it is: It seems like every week there are "special occasions" that result in me going over my calorie goals. This week, for example, my in-laws returned home after a long trip and (out of the blue) invited us to eat at a restaurant with them. Last week it was my sister's birthday and an out-of-town guest (resulted in restaurant meals, cocktails).

The difficulty is two-fold. One, I don't want to disappoint others by abstaining or refusing to do something. Two, I justify the over-consuming by telling myself that this is a one-off occasion and I will get back on track the next day. The problem, of course, is that it happens all the time!

I am struggling with a stumbling block in my food intake and could use some advice/encouragement/support.

gamerbabe14

Work out longer the next day after your occasion or bank calories in anticipation of the occasion. When it comes to surprise things, make smart choices when eating out. Every restaurant has healthy choices. Offer to share your food too. You can't use special occasions as an excuse to not eat well. These are choices and decisions you make. And know that these occasions will happen throughout your life, even after your diet is over. Gotta learn to make good choices.

bbell1985

Eating at a restaurant doesn't have to be a "special occasion" meal. You can still be in a deficit for the day if you eat lightly during the day, and make wise choices.

Going to an Italian restaurant? Order a side salad and split your entree with someone. Seafood? Easy-Get something that isn't drenched in butter and oil. Japanese? Sashimi. Etc.

allenic10

There are things you can do to still enjoy your special occasions without "ruining" your diet Most restaurants have low-cal options, or at least some healthy substitutions. You may not get to order your "favorite" dish every time, but at least you can still go out and be apart of the group. Here is what I try to do.
1. Look up the menu ahead of time. You can look up serving sizes and calories before you go, so you're less likely to overeat.
2. Don't drink your calories. I order water or iced tea most of the time. And I use diet soda for my mixer in alcoholic drinks. Avoid "pre-mixed" drinks, as it's hard to accurately track calories in them. There are also lighter beer options if that's your drink of choice.
3. Skip the appetizer. Order a side salad or veggie side to come out ahead of the meal if others in your group are ordering apps... then you still have something to munch on and won't feel left out.
4. Order something you won't feel guilty about later. Eat the recommended serving size. Left overs can be pretty delicious
5. Skip dessert. Especially if you are indulging during other parts of the meal. Order fruit or share something if you must. Try carrying bite size chocolate, hard candy, or mints to satisfy the sweet tooth at the end of a meal.

Good luck!

lauracups

When eating out you can do one of two things to stay on track, order to specifications, ie no sauces or extra butter oils, and go with lean protein and salad or go with whatever sounds good to you at that moment and when ordering ask for the take home container put half of meal in container before eating.

LotusCass

I know how you feel! Last weekend I had 3 social events where I didn't want to continually worry about what I was eating and drinking, I just wanted to enjoy it. These social events in the past were the reason I gave up. I just limit what I eat and drink to a small extent but just accept I'll mostly be eating at maintenance for those days. I then go slightly under my goal for the next few days and exercise more. I lose less those weeks but still lose. Those social events won't go on forever. Even if you have 3 or 4 in a row, just enjoy and get back on track the other days.

livingleanlivingclean

Meals out don't necessarily equal special occasion or the need to eat excessively. Decide if its actually an occasion worth splurging over in regards to food. In-laws coming home, someone else's birthday, a guest.. Not really special enough for me to go all out in my opinion!
If you still want to go, make good choices. Choose less indulgent meals, swap out highly calorific parts for lesser ones (I usually swap the high carb/high fat part for salad or vegies with dressing/sauce on the side), pick meals not likely to be drenched in oil or butter, grilled over fried etc.

ladyhusker39

If this were me, I'd try to figure out why I feel that in order to make an occasion special I need to overeat. How exactly does overeating make the occasion more special anyway? And what can you do instead of overeating to honor the occasion?

WinoGelato

I usually have one or two meals or events over the course of a week that will be more indulgent than what I would make at home or more in control of calories. Restaurant meals, pizza night with the family, birthday parties or BBQ s, etc.

I try to bank 100-200 calories in the days leading up to the event so that I have 500-1000 extra calories to work with on the weekend.

I also make sure that I get in exercise that day and consider eating lighter for the rest of the day.

I try to prioritize the foods/drinks I really want to enjoy and not just mindlessly consume food because it's there. If that's at a restaurant I may forgo the bread basket, I may just get an appetizer so I can have wine and dessert, or share an entree with my husband. If at a family BBQ I may skip the store bought coleslaw, potato salad, chips, etc and just eat the burger, some fruit and save room for dessert.

I also try to remember that the process of losing weight works best when it is done as a lifestyle change rather than a diet, Events like these are part of my life and that's not changing, so I need to figure out how to accommodate them even while I limit my calories.

Lastly, I keep perspective and remember that even though I may be over calories for a day, as long as I'm within my weekly calorie goal I will still have the desired outcome. If you are set to lose 1 lb/week, that means you have a weekly deficit of 3,500 calories already built into your goal. Even if you go over by 500-1000 calories for a weekend of fun, you will still be in a deficit and will still lose that week.

I have been here four years, lost the weight I set out to lose and am now maintaining and have had situations like this every single week. You just have to figure out your strategies and then have fun!

Lounmoun

Order lower calorie items at restaurants. Go easy on bread, rice, cheese, battered/fried foods, dressings, sauces. Try to get grilled meats and vegetables. Check out soups.
Check out nutritional info online for restaurants and see what sort of things would fit your calorie goal.
Eat smaller portions at restaurants. Split with someone or take half home.
Don't drink your calories. Get an unsweetened tea, water, diet soda.

Eat at maintenance for that day.
Eat lighter at your other meals that day or eat lighter other days that week. Look at your weekly calories.
Exercise more to accommodate eating more calories.

brookielaw

Exercise more that day in anticipation of potentially consuming more.
Check out a restaurant's menu ahead of time to make it fit within your macros.
Make the best choices you can. Lean proteins and veggies without heavy cheesy or oily sauces. I avoid pasta personally.
Share your food with someone or ask for a to-go box right away and put half of it away.
Don't drink alcohol or sugary beverages--stick to tea or water.
Learn that "special occasion" doesn't mean an excuse to overeat. Focus on the company, not the food.

Lizzy622

Summertime is the hardest with parties, visitors and picnics/BBQ. Choose the best you can and remember you don't need to eat the whole thing at once. Also as indicated above focus on who you are with instead of eating all the food. I have been to parties where I almost forgot to eat anything because I was too busy socializing.

bionicpuffy

Thank you for the advice, everyone.

You bring up a good point, @ladyhusker39 . I think that it comes down to a misguided sense of obligation and using the special occasion as an excuse or loophole.

Momepro

I'm having tbe same issues. Heres what I'm doing to try and combat it.
If you have enough tine to look up an online menu, or know pretty much what they serve, decide ahead of time what you want and how to fit into your "budget". If you know there's a !likelihood of something coming up (ie, it's my sisters birthday, we might go celebrate...) Eat less during day and try to fit in an extra few minutes of workout so you have plenty to work with. Plan to have leftovers, they make a great lunch! Restaurant portions are almost always big enough for two and sometimes 3 healthy sized meals, and knowing that it won't dissapear and be wasted if you don't eat it all NOW makes it easier to stop eating when you are no longer hungry.

RebeccaNaegle

Yes this stuff is hard for me too, esp. having a drink with everyone else. Its not that I feel obligated to, but it is hard to stay motivated when everyone wants to eat and drink crappy and you want too! I have to think ahead of the next morning. Do I want the scale to go up or down?? Do I want to be frustrated for three days again or keep trucking how I am. This diet business can be hard to do! Take it one day at a time, one meal at a time if you have to!

starfruit132

Eat or drink your favorites and don't worry about tasting everything. By now, we probably have tried it all and know what most foods taste like. Unless its a new recipe or a new restaurant or a fresh baked pie, just know you are not missing out on anything and enjoy the event.

everstrong55

This is hard for everybody. Maybe the way to go is eating slowly?