Then and now..whoa baby.....PIC heavy

Marcillene

I use to be thin, and more fit.... and then i got pregnant.. and then I became depressed. and then I became a stress eater... and then I gained... and lost... and gained.... and lost.....But here is my journey over the last few years,,, Definitally a struggle that will change your life... and control your life.... If you let it...

So this WAS me..pre-baby.





And this is my journey photo:



I still have a ways to go and a LOT of toning to do. I know even though i am closer to the same weight now as i use to be... i am no where near the same 'shape' as before... so this is not my finale.. this is just my progress photos....

Fell free to ask any questions..

Oh yeah: My son was born April 26, 2011. and i found out I was pregnant in August 2010... I use to only eat once a day....UNTIL i found out i was pregnant and quit smoking. I knew NOTHING about pregnancy... and did not have parents to teach me about parenting. i was pregnant by someone who did NOT have a job.. and i was working a full time and part time job just trying to make ends me... while pregnant i began 'eating for two'... because i wanted a healthy baby. i knew i didn't take care of myself before.. but i wanted to make sure i ate enough for him to be healthy.

I gained in my pregnancy 70-80lbs (the last 20lbs was in the last 2 weeks due to preeclampsia)

Throughout my pregnancy my depression took toll. i was bailing my sons father out of jail, working 2 jobs, trying to prepare for a baby.. and dealing with ALL the medical issues that i had while pregnant... yada yada....

Lost 30lbs from the birth... which put me around 198-194.. lost down to 168 between the time my son was born and was 7-8 months old, doing the hcg diet part of that time. When i moved to be with my sons father i moved into HELL... and i turned to over eating to compensate for stress i guess... i blew up to 193lbs by the time my son was 14 months old. i then began my journey again.... so from June 2012 until Dec. 2012 i went from 193-143lbs (some of which was starvation from stress)... and have gained almost 10lbs back since then...

i have alot more journey to go.. alot of toning and body fat to loose..

ngressman

You look great! Congratulations!

b218w

wow...

therealaubrey

Good for you for quitting smoking, if you can do that then you can do this too! P.S. you look wonderful as a brunette!

schonkreuz

What a hottie! I'm loving that dark hair

queenbea77

Be proud of yourself and what you've accomplished. You are getting healthy for your beautiful son...and I agree with the other posts - brown hair wins hands down!

mommy3457

Wow! So proud of you! That sounds so horrible what you went through. You look beautiful! I love your darker hair too.

Marcillene

Thank you everyone! I actually spent 7 years as a blonde... and went back to brunette (natural hair color is black). Definitally taking time to get use to it.

kckBxer396

Wow! You look amazing! Great work.

Marcillene

Good for you for quitting smoking, if you can do that then you can do this too! P.S. you look wonderful as a brunette!

Welp..i started smoking again... (apparently im a stress eater and smoker)...

Marcillene

Wow! So proud of you! That sounds so horrible what you went through. You look beautiful! I love your darker hair too.

Thank you! definitally trying to get use to the dark.. was blonde for 7 years haha,

DucksandOranges

Congratulations! You look great the way you are now! Congrats on the beautiful baby as well. You must be such a proud (and sexy!) mama! Good luck with the journey to quit your bad habits and pick up some new great ones!

Marcillene

Congratulations! You look great the way you are now! Congrats on the beautiful baby as well. You must be such a proud (and sexy!) mama! Good luck with the journey to quit your bad habits and pick up some new great ones!

Thank you! allthough stress eating is definitally a life long thing im afraid... i have it ALOT more under control now than i did.... with the help of cleaner eating and educating myself MORE on clean eating. i know i have alot more to learn... but hopefully in time..

ambrosdm

You should be very proud of yourself -- you're taking the right steps to take care of yourself and to take care of your baby! I hope you got far away from your ex who will only suck the life out of you (and the joy out of your life). I went through an almost identical situation more than 14 years ago. We split up, and now my children are 15 and 18 and are well-adjusted and decent people. My only advice (other than minimize contact with toxic people) is to take things one step at a time. I concentrated on quitting the smoking first (and yes, I gained 25 pounds when I quit -- total bummer but well worth it). When I was good and quit, I joined MFP and eventually lost the weight. Your life is a journey and you can take one day at a time to improve yourself. YOU CAN DO IT! Just keep at it and stay committed to yourself and your child. GOOD LUCK!

Marcillene

Here are a few more more recent:

My INSPIRATION:


[img]http://i1161.photobucket.com/albums/q506/Marcillene_Costello_Shae_Hagan/Facebook/This Life Would Kill Me If I Didnt Have You Maddo/cbb4d430-4d41-4ee7-9819-a9c85ee7a579_zps28c7f049.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i1161.photobucket.com/albums/q506/Marcillene_Costello_Shae_Hagan/Facebook/This Life Would Kill Me If I Didnt Have You Maddo/de6ab361-e48f-46cc-a207-facca8a77b2a_zps5fb8398c.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i1161.photobucket.com/albums/q506/Marcillene_Costello_Shae_Hagan/Facebook/Profile Pictures/befb66f8-92fb-4695-aeff-68c3d64e7537_zps11fd1642.jpg[/img]

Marcillene

You should be very proud of yourself -- you're taking the right steps to take care of yourself and to take care of your baby! I hope you got far away from your ex who will only suck the life out of you (and the joy out of your life). I went through an almost identical situation more than 14 years ago. We split up, and now my children are 15 and 18 and are well-adjusted and decent people. My only advice (other than minimize contact with toxic people) is to take things one step at a time. I concentrated on quitting the smoking first (and yes, I gained 25 pounds when I quit -- total bummer but well worth it). When I was good and quit, I joined MFP and eventually lost the weight. Your life is a journey and you can take one day at a time to improve yourself. YOU CAN DO IT! Just keep at it and stay committed to yourself and your child. GOOD LUCK!

Thank you for this! i am so glad you shared! Well... he took off when my son was 15 months after i had already put him through rehab and he got addicted one week after completely the program. he was gone until a few months ago and he has moved back to town and is trying to 'be a better dad'. i have given wayyy too much lee-way... but only because i know he is sober now. ive told him... once hes on drugs again thats it.. no more visitations.. nothing... im not raising a child like that... or around that..

USMCnetty90

WHAT A HANDSOME BOY!!! You look fantastic! Be proud of yourself!!!!

DigitalDiana

Congratulations on making great parenting decisions! You look awesome! May your future bring you much success and pleasure!!!
Good luck with your journey!

bubbles1212

You look absolutely amazing!!!! You did a great job!!!!!!!!

bikermike5094

congrats to you on your success. Takes a lot of work to lose baby weight when raising a little one.. you should be proud.

sounds also like you got your head screwed on right too concerning the dad.... thats awesome that your willing to draw those lines in the sand. You sound like a pretty smart cookie!

Marcillene

Congratulations on making great parenting decisions! You look awesome! May your future bring you much success and pleasure!!!
Good luck with your journey!

congrats to you on your success. Takes a lot of work to lose baby weight when raising a little one.. you should be proud.

sounds also like you got your head screwed on right too concerning the dad.... thats awesome that your willing to draw those lines in the sand. You sound like a pretty smart cookie!

Thank you all. its a VERY hard line to cross and deal with... hense one of the reasons my stress level stays high.. and its taking me alot longer to reach goal and get to where i need to be.

mccbabe1

:drinker: wow.. what a story! i can totally understand.. (i dont have a baby yet/prego) but the emotional /stress/comfort eating.. ive ALWAYS done that.. thus ive been over wt too! and i have lost a good amount in the last yr on mfp.. but have basically maintained or up some last 8mo after loosing 40 in 4 mo!!!! it really is soo much MENTAL before the physical...(stress eating/motivation) etc...
you are a beautiful woman.. and cute ticker picture too! Im nervous to have a baby in the near future with an awesum man and who has a good job! so I cant even IMAGINE the stress/pain :brokenheart: you went through! and I am sorry for that...
you have taken control back of YOU and your life.. and you look amazing..
keep kickin *kitten*!

JessicaZen

You look great keep up the great work. Congratulations on the baby.:flowerforyou:

Marcillene

:drinker: wow.. what a story! i can totally understand.. (i dont have a baby yet/prego) but the emotional /stress/comfort eating.. ive ALWAYS done that.. thus ive been over wt too! and i have lost a good amount in the last yr on mfp.. but have basically maintained or up some last 8mo after loosing 40 in 4 mo!!!! it really is soo much MENTAL before the physical...(stress eating/motivation) etc...
you are a beautiful woman.. and cute ticker picture too! Im nervous to have a baby in the near future with an awesum man and who has a good job! so I cant even IMAGINE the stress/pain :brokenheart: you went through! and I am sorry for that...
you have taken control back of YOU and your life.. and you look amazing..
keep kickin *kitten*!

Thank you so much! its wonderfully inspiring and helpful to hear how others struggle with stress eating as well... and i have a WAYS to go until i feel like im back in control of MY life... i still feel like i am under that cloud since i allow my sons father to control some of my emotions and pain still....but one day...

one day soon ill be there

eep223

You're doing an awesome job! And good on you for noting when your weight loss has been due to stress... When I was at my thinnest, I was also out of my mind with depression. I have to keep reminding myself that I might not get to that size again, and doing this the right way is the only way. I will be stronger when I reach my goal this time, and I probably won't gain it back either, if i focus on dealing with the problems that are at the root.

Good for you! Keep it up! [I also like the darker hair better on you! ]

Marcillene

You're doing an awesome job! And good on you for noting when your weight loss has been due to stress... When I was at my thinnest, I was also out of my mind with depression. I have to keep reminding myself that I might not get to that size again, and doing this the right way is the only way. I will be stronger when I reach my goal this time, and I probably won't gain it back either, if i focus on dealing with the problems that are at the root.

Good for you! Keep it up! [I also like the darker hair better on you! ]

Thank you! stress eating is definitally a life long struggle. i think you are completely right when you say to remind yourself. Some days i can remind myself BETTER.. and some days i COMPLETELY fall off the band wagon... but I've found more recently that I will pick myself back up to eating better, in time... in which when i let myself get so much heavier.. I would not/could not pick myself back up.