I'm failing, feeling like I'm letting myself and everyone down

Gram1959

My weight is up again, it's all I am thinking about. I have just started tracking again because this last weight gain has scared me. I stopped tracking and my job is now much more sedentary, so I know I did this to myself. I have to lose weight and I'm sinking. Anyone else have this happen to them?

livingleanlivingclean

You definitely aren't failing - you've realised you need to do something, and I'm guessing you know what that is considering you know how you put the weight on.

Start making changes - get back to tracking, and start moving more in other ways to compensate for less activity at work.

c_ward1983

If you're overwhelmed, just start small. Small diet changes or small physical changes to increase your overall activity.

amtyrell

You are succeeding. You realized the problem and the root cause and are taking sensible steps to fix it. That is success!!!Congratulations

ivetastic

@Gram1959 been there as well! I'm back and working hard to get my health, my body and my old self back and so are you. You're here so that's a great first step!!!! It's been said that it takes about 21 days to start a new habit so start a routine even if it's something small to get you started. You can maybe start with counting steps. Most smart phones have a step counter now a days or if you haven't invested in a fitness watch it's something very motivating for a lot of us. I love my Fitbit. I went from barely getting 10,000 steps to getting 20,000 steps every day and it took me like a month. You can do this!!!

88olds

Well, I gained until I got scared enough to do something about it. I've been on WL boards a while, always chuckle at posts that say fear is not a motivator. Sure motivated me.

Looking back, I think CPAP saved my life. All of a sudden I could do a bit of clear headed thinking. I was just sort of fatting myself to death. I was going to leave two kids with no dad. Who would do something like that? So I relate to the idea of letting other people down. And ultimately what that would say about me.

Calculate a modest calorie deficit. Find a way to be a bit more active. Keep tracking. When I started WL I read somewhere that a food journal was the #1 thing to do.

I've lost 100+ lbs and its been gone 10 yrs. I always got good advice from my Gram, let me try to give back.

Keep tracking no matter what. The good, the bad and the ugly. The initial calculations can be a pain. Weigh and measure (weigh is preferable) when possible. Research NI, or make good faith estimates when you must. When you get the numbers right you should get the scale going on a modest downward trend. The trend is your friend. Ride along. When (if) you stall, make moderate adjustments to get your trend back.

Monitor your thinking. Push back against negative thoughts. Nobody can stop negativity from popping into their heads. Our brains never shut off, a lot of what it spews out is junk. There's something about obesity that grabs the negative. Don't let your brain convince you that every hiccup is a disaster.

What I see on these boards is that the #1 stumbling block is this- time. In the long run, and you are in for the long run, it probably takes 1 or 2 weeks for every pound you want to lose. That's the part of the trend that people's brains attack first, the time. Don't use this to kick yourself for gaining. It took time to gain, it takes time to lose.
That's why I keep talking about moderate changes, you have to be able to live with your plan. The best plan is one you will actually follow. If your plan is not working, make a better plan.

PS From your screen name I've assumed you're a grandmother and were either born in '59 or were 59 when you opened your account. If it helps, I joined WW at age 56. I'm 67. I weigh about what I did when I graduated high school. It's doable.

PPS Motivation is unreliable. Think determination. Good luck. Sorry this is so long, you struck a nerve.

gabriellejayde

losing weight is a process and sometimes, you'll have set backs. maybe even back to where you started. EVERYONE does, so don't worry or beat yourself up over it, just pick yourself up and start again.
Instead of focusing on the big, overwhelming picture, focus on ONE DAY. Just get through today making good choices. If you fall down, make it a little stumble (if you eat a cookie, don't tell yourself that you've already blown it for the day and eat the whole box... just enjoy the cookie and decide if the guilt was worth it.)
What sometimes helps me is to sit quietly and have a little pep talk with myself. I talk to myself about what's important, and what I want to do and why and make a promise to myself to get through just today and then see if I can do it again. I usually can and you can too.

timtam163

Oh my that's a lot of pressure to put on yourself for having gained a little weight! I know it feels like a lot is riding on you to get healthy, but it definitely sounds like a lot of pressure to be perfect all the time. So you slipped up a little; it's part of life. Don't forget to live a little, and remember that people love you no matter what the scale says.

Theo166

You have to trust the process, if you log your food honestly you will lose weight. The feedback definitely causes one to adjust their eating over time and weight will come off. Ignoring it is the only thing that doesn't work.

PKM0515

So much knowledge and helpful information in this thread, and not just applicable to weight loss. I've been feeling very overwhelmed about a number of things in my life. Reading this thread is giving me a bit of hope. Thank you.

Gram1959

Thank you everyone. I am tracking everything even when I go over and them I see what I ate and start another day hoping to do better. I need to drink more water between supper and bedtime as this is where the extra calories are showing up

88olds

Something that helped me were planned evening snacks. An 8 o'clock, and a just before bed. The bedtime was not much.

But this way I was only waiting until later. It was only a matter of a little patience, not a battle of willpower.

CassondraKennedy

88olds wrote: »

Something that helped me were planned evening snacks. An 8 o'clock, and a just before bed. The bedtime was not much.

But this way I was only waiting until later. It was only a matter of a little patience, not a battle of willpower.

I do this too. When I first started, I would really struggle thinking that I couldn't eat anything after dinner. Pre-planning snacks has been a huge help to me. Hang in there, @Gram1959. We all started somewhere. You'll thank yourself for starting now and sticking with it no matter what.

runningforthetrain

Everything 88olds said! There is so much help here on MFP. Try upping your protein and fiber which helps with satiation at lower calories.

Gram1959

At the Wharton Clinic an down 2 oz not much but better than up

leopardessa

You are not failing at all! There are so many people out there that either do not acknowledge they should lose weight or they do, but complacently do nothing. You are a success because you want to do something about it.

Increasing your water intake is a great idea. I, too, had to do that. It is crazy that we can store a few pounds of water simply because we do not hydrate our bodies.

Just keep reminding yourself that when you set your plan in place it takes time to see results on the scale and you will sometimes see results in measuring your waist before the scale goes down.

alkight84

I have a sedentary job as well. I got a Fitbit and it has helped tremendously. I get up every hour to get my 250 steps. My boss even got me a headset so I could keep it up!
You know what you need to do and now. We just have to stick to it!! I have faith in ya!

88olds

Hold that thought "down is better than up. " Never let it go.

Gram1959

How was your day? I had a good day went to aquafit and stayed under my calorie goal

Gram1959

July is almost over. I still haven't lost any weight but I'm tracking every day I'm hoping it will keep me honest even if I go over my allotted calories. How is every else doing?

88olds

I'm fine, thanks for asking.

Good going. Tracking is #1. Kudos for tracking when over calories. The process is more important than the numbers. It will work.

CoueCoue

You're taking responsibilty. That's a surprisingly brave thing to do. So many people don't, so you're already ahead in my opinion.

Well done for that and KEEP GOING!