100lbs (45 kg) to lose - I'm here for the long haul

Lenascrivente

16 August 2017

Dear all
I have been toying with MFP since last year but found out it reactivated an old eating disorder.
One year after, I decided to start again from mindset and I'm here for the long haul.
As most people with a past of eating disorders, I did manage to lose weight effectively in the past, and got it all back with some more .
The last time in 2012 I lost 20 kgs in 6 months, just through self-regulated eating, exercise and a lot of self-compassion and love for myself.
So how did it all creep up again , with a plus of 9 kgs?
Increased stress and emotionally traumatic events in my life, poor stress management and a lack of support systems to keep it up. From 2013 to 2017, I put on 29 kgs again.
So I am here to lose 45 kgs over 2 years, at a pace of about 2 kgs per month on average.
As by now I know that weight loss is not a linear process, I think I will use less stressful months to lose 4 kgs, and more stressful months to lose a minimum of 2. This will minimise stressing about plateaus and having to deal with difficult life moments that I foresee will be there, given my family situation with 2 members struggling against cancer.
Also my thyroid stopped working properly last winter and I am still adjusting medication so this should be taken into account.
This is how it would look like ideally:
100 lbs (45 kgs) = 20 lbs x 5 (9 kgs x 5)
Each goal is 9 kgs in five months. I decided to skip February because for me it's the hardest month of the year; and August because I am likely to be on vacation and don't want to track and plan because letting loose is good for my soul. My overall goal is to overcome the diet/binge dualistic way of thinking, make peace with food and my body, stabilise at a weight which is 45 kgs lower than now and my healthy weight. All of this , I want to do in a way that will allow me to stabilise and enter middle-age at a healthy weight. I want to celebrate my 39th birthday in April 2020 by saying: I am in a healthy place and have consolidated healthy food and exercise patterns. I let my old patterns of binging and dieting go and enter middle age with a peace of mind and body.
In this way I hope to help myself cope better with my thyroid problem and decrease my chances of getting diabetes and cancer (my parents have both unfortunately). I want to feel I have done everything I could to stay healthy.

Every goal reached brings with it a reward, which for me basically means a TRIP!! somewhere nice!

GOAL 1
September 1st 2017 to January 30th 2018
From 106 kgs to 97 kgs - minus 9

reward: winter summer break somewhere sunny

GOAL 2
March 1 2018 to July 30th 2018
From 97 kgs to 89 kgs - minus 9

reward: amazing summer holiday in August
my 37th birthday in a beautiful outfit

GOAL 3
September 1 2018 to January 30th 2019
From 89 kgs to 80 kgs - minus 9

reward: winter summer break somewhere sunny

GOAL 4
March 1 2019 to July 30th 2019
From 80 kgs to 71 kgs - minus 9

reward: amazing summer holiday in August
my 38th birthday in an amazing dress

GOAL 5
September 1 2019 to December 30th 2019
From 71 kgs to 62 kgs - minus 9 and overall goal reached

reward: celebrate my 39th birthday at my lowest weight ever
celebrate turning 39 taking care of my health and well-being

Before September 1st I will post my plan for the first month and will keep logging in.
Please befriend me if you have success stories to share about losing 100 lbs, hypothyroidism and eating disorders.
Thanks!
Lena