My mom Thinks I'm Anorexic or Bulimic

recentcoin

First off, I would suggest that you find a psychologist to talk to. Not because *you* need one but because a good one can teach you new and hopefully more productive ways to cope with the people in your life. I suspect that your mother is suffering from something that psychologist call "projection".

Secondly, a "portion" of meat (4-6 oz depending) is usually about the size of a deck of playing cards. You don't really need a scale for that.

Thirdly, you can pick one up at Dollar General, Target, Wal-Mart, etc. for $10-$20. Then you can start to portion out your foods into zip lock bags so that you can clearly see what a portion is. Perhaps this will serve as a wake-up call to your family that the entire container is not a single portion.

DebbieLyn63

Congratulations of being strong and over coming MANY boundaries in your personal life especially with the lack of family support! It just shows how dedicated you are to yourself! I truly hope you feel wonderful about yourself!

As for your mom -- people get set in their ways. It doesn't matter whether it is being obese, excessive shopping, hoarding or anything else. Your mom may see things one of two ways 1) She doesn't have a problem with being obese and doesn't see why you should worry or 2) is SCARED and has a sense of jealousy because you have been able to achieve what she has not. She may feel that this weight loss has dragged you away from her, and is creating emotional barriers. She is losing her daughter.

You can sit down and try to talk to your mother but I have a striking suspicion she won't hear any of it but i still suggest you try.

My advice, don't use scales, don't weigh your food. That will only aggravate her while you are living under the same roof. Second, weighing your food creates a bad habit. Remember, at the end of the day you want your food choices to be second nature to you, not a chore. It's about a lifestyle change not a diet. It is very common to see women with eating disorders to weigh their food and over estimate. If you're worried your not losing, switch around your foods

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. EAT HEALTHY! Don't weigh your food From your photo you look amazing!

EDIT: My mom used to do the same thing except she isn't overweight at all. She was so obsessed over her own weight that projection occurred. That hammered me down for years, later on i confronted my mom about it, she can still be a bit bad, but i sat down and told her, that her attitude really affects me, i love her dearly but she really has to be careful what she says around me. I know how it feels, it sucks.

Seriously? How else do you know you are eating the correct amount of food and keep an accurate account of your calories?

Sure, after a while, you learn what a proper portion looks like and don't have to weigh everything every time, but don't make a blanket statement that weighing your food creates a bad habit. The majority of the overweight people on here, are this way because they don't know what normal portions are. Weighing our food teaches us that, and keeps us honest with our calories.
And since this site is set up around counting calories, weighing and measuring accurately is the way to know how many calories we are eating.

Hollywoodm55

My mother is also a diabetic on insulin and continues to eat an unhealthy diet. Although she is somewhat supportive of my goals she does not understand them and does not want to change what she is doing. People have told me you cannot change a person, they have to want it themselves. Good luck to you.

chelsifina

My mom, who is chronically overweight, did the same thing to me when I was living with her. The advice you are getting about having her go to the doc's or the dietician's with you is just great! Rather than have her be the authority, rest on the advice of a real authority! One tremendous blessing for me is that my very strict diet (though stricter than I would have chosen for myself) is my doc's precription so that when family start to complain I can simply refer all questions to my doctor. I love that. Overall, eating healthfully is challenge enough, and I commend you on having the success you have all while living with a person constantly trying to sabotage you. Trust me, I completely understand how it feels to have your mother be jealous of you and act out. Its so awful.

If she does get into your head, keep in mind that bulimia involves purging and anorexia is diagnosed by having a weight that is 85% under the average weight for your height and age. If neither one of those sound like you, you are probably okay. Enjoy life!! Don't the haters get to you!

frenchfacey

got scale for 9.99. it measures grams ounces fl oz ml everything

and i would be LOST without it

who the **** knows what 300 grams of anything looks like?


and pay no mind to your sister, family is sometimes just people we are related to, and they dont always know, or want whats best. im sorry girl

stacetherainbow

I disagree with the poster who suggested that weighing food creates bad habits.. It's exactly the opposite. Weighing your food will create a depth of knowledge for you regarding real portion sizes, which become second nature. Some people may even have to weigh food for the rest of their lives, but isn't that worth the benefit of a healthier body?
Like most of the others mentioned, keep doing your thing, even when it seems you're getting very little support. Get your support here.
And maybe your family IS trying to keep you "fat" because your health journey makes them uncomfortable with themselves. But that's on them. I would recommend you be careful not to project your feelings on them though. You might want to ease up on the judgment of what they're eating. You felt unhappy with your body when you were heavier, don't let it affect how you see other people. I'm sure you'd hate to have know that someone was judging you.
Good luck with your journey!

NYCNika

I realize none of it is going to help with someone of you mom's mindset (who does not even have a comprehension of what she is doing to herself), but I would be careful of what language I'm using.

Do not use words that suggest you want to be skinnier, make emphasis on HEALTHY. Healthy weight, healthy BMI... healthy foods.

Who says you need to lose more weight? -- The government (CDC). Blame them.

Show the guidelines for your height and weight and mention that you want to be smack in the middle of that, and you want to get there in a healthy way. And that since you have a family history of diabetis/high blood pressure/high cholesterol/(insert what applies), you understand that you must be extra conscientious with your health from early age to fight that predisposition and make sure that your health and your future children's health is not compromised by these issues.