Putting it out there

Felt like letting some things out as I sit here alone cause hey, why not. So lost a lot gained a lot back on it again, 3 weeks after emergency c section. Emotions are ridiculous, mind is not working,feeling stressed and sad at this moment. Figured if I got it out here it would be as if I was talking to someone but also getting it out so I can move on to the next to do list, diaper change lunch packing, laundry, cleaning, full time job, no sleep, what else do I have to do next task. Sounds depressing but just in a funk currently. I want my self back which I feel I've lost. Gosh that sounds bad too. Not usually this morose sounding but like I said in a funk. Lost 40 pounds of post pregnancy water weight in a week now not loosing anything the next week even though I am barely eating, who has time for that?! Will I ever feel good again? Will I ever get myself back? I have a great family and life, why do I feel this way? Where is my happy go get em I can do it normal self? Is she gone? Please come back, I need the strength. Feel alone, but gotta keep moving like a robot with no real feeling cause others depend on me. No rhym or reason just needed to expel these emotions and put them out there so maybe they will leave me. I write in a moment of ridiculousness and tiredness, just plain tired and wore out, tired of thinking. Apologies to anyone who has happened to read this in my moment if weird despair.

Replies

  • Kwoconnor
    Kwoconnor Posts: 39 Member
    edited September 2017
    This too shall pass.

    Re-evaluate your WHY. Why do you want to get in shape.

    Make your why big enough and you'll find your way once again.

    Thanks for sharing how you're feeling. It's good to get it out
  • kimothy38
    kimothy38 Posts: 840 Member
    Weird despair? Not all, sounds normal to me for anyone with a newborn. I'm sure most mothers felt like this at stage, particularly when sleep deprived and any resilience you had has been eroded. I wonder though if you should talk to a professional (eg doctor, midwife etc) in case it's is something more severe like post natal depression. Big hugs to you. This too shall pass, eventually.
  • darlamiller
    darlamiller Posts: 27 Member
    Your hormones are all over the place trying to get back to not being pregnant , they are trying to balance back to normal and the process unbalance's you!! You need to rest when baby rests and let's others do for themselves for awhile !! You know having a baby is no small thing , your body just went through 9 months of making another human being and that is huge!!! Not to mention then giving birth, which is also huge it stresses your body !!! Then you add on top of that now you have this little life depending on you that you didn't have before , and that is a big adjustment !! I think you are being to hard on yourself just try and relax till everything (body as well) settles down!! If a friend or your mom is near by have them come over and help for a bit , and you get some rest !!! If you need an ear I'm always here you are welcome to add me or message me !!! Right now just take a little time for you if you are still really struggling when you go back for your 4 week check up tell your doctor they can and will help you!! Big big hugs little mama!!!!
  • Thank you for your kind words and positive advise!!
  • Amazing what reading what you all have said has made me feel better!
    Thank you!