So - Is There Such A Thing As Different Builds/Bone Structures?

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  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    meganpettigrew86 wrote: »
    I'm currently overweight, a couple kg off normal bmi. My goal is 7-10kg less but if I start getting too skinny I will not push it. Bmi scale is not perfect.
    This is taken yesterday.
    ZoXDSVb.jpg

    You look amazing and not remotely overweight. Well done you.
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    maggibailey wrote: »
    If age stopped us having issues that would be fabulous! But alas it doesn’t and there is no shame in knowing what your issue is and dealing with it. I am sure you are aware that exercise can be used in the same manner as other EDs. My beautiful cousin deals with Anerexia on top of a compulsive exercise problem that leaves her almost malnourished. If you are not fueling your workouts they will do pretty serious damage to your body. My suggestion though hard to hear would be take a break from all of it and let your body heal while you wait for counseling. Having an ED or any other mental disorder does not make you weak or ridiculous. It just means you have to focus on health first while your mind catches up with the program.

    I think it is more the fact that my original anorexia was at 14-18 and I am now 42. It is frustrating it still reappears every so often and once it has you in it's grip, it is very, very hard to break free, especially if you are not sure entirely of the reasons behind. In my case, it started as a result of my boyfriend becoming more intimate too soon, unaware I have a history of childhood sexual abuse, and I thought it would just correct itself once we took a step back but it has not. So I do not know what it causing it to continue now. I have only had periods of totally normal eating behaviours over the decades anyway, interspersed by periods of extreme binge eating, purging, restricting and exercising a lot, although in my case, I genuinely find the exercise very useful for my depression and it gets out some of my stress. It was not an issue before when I trained a lot and hard because I was a higher weight.

    I am actually eating over 2000 calories a day currently, only training 3-4 times per week and am very careful to get in my protein, fats, carbs. I studied, in my own time, as a special interest (I have Autism) nutrition and fitness for several years. However, at this point that knowledge isn't helping me. I am not one of those people who can easily moderate such things as cake, chocolate, biscuits as I do love those kinds of foods almost as much as I love my chicken, fruit, veggies,nuts and seeds. I have yet to get back to a point where I can have some cake, have some chocolate, in a normal amount, and not feel bad about it.

    Believe me, back when I was really training hard, I had no issue having a slice of cake on a daily basis. I was eating in excess of 3k calories back then and maintaining. I was encouraging others in their lifestyles and people would ask me for advice. I even have a success story posted up from that time and I feel like a real fraud now. I can only guess part of this is a sense that I am a failure in most other aspects of my life, and this is one thing I can control.

    So yes, it is humiliating to have fallen so far from where I was when I used to be a regular here back in 2013/2014.
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    beckkkahhhx3 wrote: »
    Graelwyn75 wrote: »
    maggibailey wrote: »
    If age stopped us having issues that would be fabulous! But alas it doesn’t and there is no shame in knowing what your issue is and dealing with it. I am sure you are aware that exercise can be used in the same manner as other EDs. My beautiful cousin deals with Anerexia on top of a compulsive exercise problem that leaves her almost malnourished. If you are not fueling your workouts they will do pretty serious damage to your body. My suggestion though hard to hear would be take a break from all of it and let your body heal while you wait for counseling. Having an ED or any other mental disorder does not make you weak or ridiculous. It just means you have to focus on health first while your mind catches up with the program.

    I think it is more the fact that my original anorexia was at 14-18 and I am now 42. It is frustrating it still reappears every so often and once it has you in it's grip, it is very, very hard to break free, especially if you are not sure entirely of the reasons behind. In my case, it started as a result of my boyfriend becoming more intimate too soon, unaware I have a history of childhood sexual abuse, and I thought it would just correct itself once we took a step back but it has not. So I do not know what it causing it to continue now. I have only had periods of totally normal eating behaviours over the decades anyway, interspersed by periods of extreme binge eating, purging, restricting and exercising a lot, although in my case, I genuinely find the exercise very useful for my depression and it gets out some of my stress. It was not an issue before when I trained a lot and hard because I was a higher weight.

    I am actually eating over 2000 calories a day currently, only training 3-4 times per week and am very careful to get in my protein, fats, carbs. I studied, in my own time, as a special interest (I have Autism) nutrition and fitness for several years. However, at this point that knowledge isn't helping me. I am not one of those people who can easily moderate such things as cake, chocolate, biscuits as I do love those kinds of foods almost as much as I love my chicken, fruit, veggies,nuts and seeds. I have yet to get back to a point where I can have some cake, have some chocolate, in a normal amount, and not feel bad about it.

    Believe me, back when I was really training hard, I had no issue having a slice of cake on a daily basis. I was eating in excess of 3k calories back then and maintaining. I was encouraging others in their lifestyles and people would ask me for advice. I even have a success story posted up from that time and I feel like a real fraud now. I can only guess part of this is a sense that I am a failure in most other aspects of my life, and this is one thing I can control.

    So yes, it is humiliating to have fallen so far from where I was when I used to be a regular here back in 2013/2014.

    2000 calories counting what you purge? Or before? You could be eating a lot less if your counting calories you've purged in there. Wow you were doing so well back then. Hope you can get back there. Don't feel like a fraud everyone struggles from time to time when you've had a past with an ED. The most important thing is catching it before it gets too bad and it's too hard to pull yourself out.

    My base, without exercise, is set to 2090 calories. I am averaging around 2300 calories a day, and I generally log 50-75% of food I purge in my diary to be sure as I am aware that certainly some is absorbed. Sometimes, at weekends, this count exceeds 3k calories. I generally burn 900 calories x 3-4 times a week at the gym also.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
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    Graelwyn75 wrote: »
    maggibailey wrote: »
    If age stopped us having issues that would be fabulous! But alas it doesn’t and there is no shame in knowing what your issue is and dealing with it. I am sure you are aware that exercise can be used in the same manner as other EDs. My beautiful cousin deals with Anerexia on top of a compulsive exercise problem that leaves her almost malnourished. If you are not fueling your workouts they will do pretty serious damage to your body. My suggestion though hard to hear would be take a break from all of it and let your body heal while you wait for counseling. Having an ED or any other mental disorder does not make you weak or ridiculous. It just means you have to focus on health first while your mind catches up with the program.

    I think it is more the fact that my original anorexia was at 14-18 and I am now 42. It is frustrating it still reappears every so often and once it has you in it's grip, it is very, very hard to break free, especially if you are not sure entirely of the reasons behind. In my case, it started as a result of my boyfriend becoming more intimate too soon, unaware I have a history of childhood sexual abuse, and I thought it would just correct itself once we took a step back but it has not. So I do not know what it causing it to continue now. I have only had periods of totally normal eating behaviours over the decades anyway, interspersed by periods of extreme binge eating, purging, restricting and exercising a lot, although in my case, I genuinely find the exercise very useful for my depression and it gets out some of my stress. It was not an issue before when I trained a lot and hard because I was a higher weight.

    I am actually eating over 2000 calories a day currently, only training 3-4 times per week and am very careful to get in my protein, fats, carbs. I studied, in my own time, as a special interest (I have Autism) nutrition and fitness for several years. However, at this point that knowledge isn't helping me. I am not one of those people who can easily moderate such things as cake, chocolate, biscuits as I do love those kinds of foods almost as much as I love my chicken, fruit, veggies,nuts and seeds. I have yet to get back to a point where I can have some cake, have some chocolate, in a normal amount, and not feel bad about it.

    Believe me, back when I was really training hard, I had no issue having a slice of cake on a daily basis. I was eating in excess of 3k calories back then and maintaining. I was encouraging others in their lifestyles and people would ask me for advice. I even have a success story posted up from that time and I feel like a real fraud now. I can only guess part of this is a sense that I am a failure in most other aspects of my life, and this is one thing I can control.

    So yes, it is humiliating to have fallen so far from where I was when I used to be a regular here back in 2013/2014.

    My understanding is that for many people, eating disorders are all about control, which matches what you're saying here. Are there any new things going on in your life that make you feel out of control right now? Would it be possible to pick one source of stress and work to resolve it?

    I know that when I started dieting to control my diabetes, I had a history of comfort eating, and I decided that instead of giving up the one thing that made me feel better and trying to white-knuckle my way through, I needed to fix a couple of the things that were long term problems in my life. I made a list of half a dozen problems which had been ruining my life for years and resolved to focus on them, one at a time. This was last year and so far I am down three big issues and working on four. My everyday life is so much better, even with the remaining problems, and I feel more optimistic since I have had a couple of successes. And I do think it has helped me not feel the need to eat to comfort myself. Just writing down a list of the things that needed work and what could be done about them was a big step for me in going forward. Do you think something similar would be helpful for you?

    Since you did ask, I think you are underweight right now. Your muscles are beautiful but the stress shows in your face, and you don't have anything left to lose - if you keep going you are going to be losing muscle.

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