Revenge body in the making

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2

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  • riaanaugustyn
    riaanaugustyn Posts: 13 Member
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    rsclause wrote: »
    All women and probably all men say "you are getting in shape, dieting because of someone else". I just ignore it and keep moving forward. I also do my workouts before she gets out of bed so she can't say I am taking time from her. We've been together for 35 years now.

    Did exactly the same. The issue was never the time. The issue was always that it was for someone else. When in actual fact it was for her and my little boy to be healthy and not die an early death like my father.
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    Jesus no wonder your wife was insecure lol, just curious what kind of shape was she in? Gonna be honest here, If I saw you heading back to that and I was out of shape myself, I would be insecure too, however I would jump on the bandwagon not try to derail you.
  • riaanaugustyn
    riaanaugustyn Posts: 13 Member
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    emmydoodles83 wrote: »
    Jesus no wonder your wife was insecure lol, just curious what kind of shape was she in? Gonna be honest here, If I saw you heading back to that and I was out of shape myself, I would be insecure too, however I would jump on the bandwagon not try to derail you.

    She is very petite and healthy. Had no reason to feel insecure.
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    riaanaugustyn wrote: »
    emmydoodles83 wrote: »
    Jesus no wonder your wife was insecure lol, just curious what kind of shape was she in? Gonna be honest here, If I saw you heading back to that and I was out of shape myself, I would be insecure too, however I would jump on the bandwagon not try to derail you.

    She is very petite and healthy. Had no reason to feel insecure.

    Hmm, well that sucks then. Good luck to you, I'm sure the end results will be amazing.
  • jcstevens86
    jcstevens86 Posts: 3,338 Member
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    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense
  • BrotherBill913
    BrotherBill913 Posts: 661 Member
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    Sorry to hear of your troubles..
    I had a buddy that went through pretty much the exact same thing. When It happened I thought what the heck man???? But he survived it and was better than before, you will be too.. Best of luck....
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
    edited October 2017
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    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    lol actually it's more of when one is fit and not the other. It went the same way when my cousin started losing weight, her husband thought she was getting fit for someone else. So it goes both ways. What didn't make sense to me is that he said his wife was petite and healthy, so I am not sure why she would be insecure, of course we only know a very very little bit, I am sure it was more complicated than just that.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    don't make sweeping judgments, its not 'all women', just those who are insecure.
  • Jancandoit7
    Jancandoit7 Posts: 356 Member
    edited October 2017
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    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    Totally make no sense to me either- it's insecurity to be sure- my partner and I are doing it together- which def makes it much easier (cooking and such)- but I'd take a healthy partner any day! It's more than just looking good-
  • ladychris29
    ladychris29 Posts: 4,657 Member
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    Incredible transition. You should feel super proud of yourself. You look amazing--and moreover, seem as though you feel better. That's the best part of the journey.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    emmydoodles83 wrote: »
    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    lol actually it's more of when one is fit and not the other. It went the same way when my cousin started losing weight, her husband thought she was getting fit for someone else. So it goes both ways. What didn't make sense to me is that he said his wife was petite and healthy, so I am not sure why she would be insecure, of course we only know a very very little bit, I am sure it was more complicated than just that.

    so if you're thin you're not insecure?! :huh:
  • jcstevens86
    jcstevens86 Posts: 3,338 Member
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    That's the thing i don't like thin petite women....i like some thickness to women...
  • ipmac22
    ipmac22 Posts: 74 Member
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    Jancandoit7 wrote: »
    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    Totally make no sense to me either- it's insecurity to be sure- my partner and I are doing it together- which def makes it much easier (cooking and such)- but I'd take a healthy partner any day! It's more than just looking good-

    Agreed, my boyfriend and I are often working on our separate goals together. We often go to the gym together, or at least help each other make room in our schedules so we can go when we want.
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
    edited October 2017
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    TavistockToad wrote: »
    emmydoodles83 wrote: »
    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    Why is it when us men are physically fit or have a nice physique women are insecure about it....its like we cant be fit if in a relationship because we will be more appealing to other women...males no sense

    lol actually it's more of when one is fit and not the other. It went the same way when my cousin started losing weight, her husband thought she was getting fit for someone else. So it goes both ways. What didn't make sense to me is that he said his wife was petite and healthy, so I am not sure why she would be insecure, of course we only know a very very little bit, I am sure it was more complicated than just that.

    so if you're thin you're not insecure?! :huh:

    I'm not making that sweeping generalization at all, when I said it's more of I mean it's more like (as in a lot of situations) stating that it happens to both men and women, not just women. And even on MFP you do hear a lot of one person trying to get fit and the other is unsupportive or insecure. But obviously insecurity knows no shape,size or reason.
  • FitGamerSmoak
    FitGamerSmoak Posts: 224 Member
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    Keep it up! Divorce is hard, relationships are hard, but "revenge" can make the body harder LOL. Okay my useless funny for the day. Even if you aren't exacting revenge you are still getting back to you and that's what's important. Keep it up and you will have an amazing journey. Great job getting back to you!
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    When my dad divorced he bought himself a Ram truck and tuned the radio to Country. Who knew? When my hubby divorced his first wife he joined the gym and got pretty darn good at step aerobics. One of the big positives of a breakup is you get to do those things that's more "you" than "us".

    I'm not so cool on revenge goals as the motivation should wane with time. Then what you gonna do?

    But you are doing what makes you strong and happy. Great work!
  • riaanaugustyn
    riaanaugustyn Posts: 13 Member
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    I think it had a lot to do with attention.She is very very good looking and 8 years younger than me. The attention she got never bothered me, as I actually felt good that she was mine. When I started getting some attention, she couldn't handle it. My opinion anyway. I will propably never know and to be honest don't really care.
  • jcstevens86
    jcstevens86 Posts: 3,338 Member
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    riaanaugustyn wrote: »
    I think it had a lot to do with attention.She is very very good looking and 8 years younger than me. The attention she got never bothered me, as I actually felt good that she was mine. When I started getting some attention, she couldn't handle it. My opinion anyway. I will propably never know and to be honest don't really care.
    im thinkin mine and yours were sisters lol
  • riaanaugustyn
    riaanaugustyn Posts: 13 Member
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    jcstevens86 wrote: »
    riaanaugustyn wrote: »
    I think it had a lot to do with attention.She is very very good looking and 8 years younger than me. The attention she got never bothered me, as I actually felt good that she was mine. When I started getting some attention, she couldn't handle it. My opinion anyway. I will propably never know and to be honest don't really care.
    im thinkin mine and yours were sisters lol

    Bwahahahaha
  • riaanaugustyn
    riaanaugustyn Posts: 13 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    When my dad divorced he bought himself a Ram truck and tuned the radio to Country. Who knew? When my hubby divorced his first wife he joined the gym and got pretty darn good at step aerobics. One of the big positives of a breakup is you get to do those things that's more "you" than "us".

    I'm not so cool on revenge goals as the motivation should wane with time. Then what you gonna do?

    But you are doing what makes you strong and happy. Great work!

    Sure it will fade. From there the new motivation would be to meet someone new who accepts me the way I am, and love to exercise and eat healthy with me. Rather join me than break me down.

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