Difficult to eat healthy with new husband

_super_sarah_
_super_sarah_ Posts: 5 Member
edited November 22 in Health and Weight Loss
Really trying to find balance, I just got married to someone who loves to eat out. I'm finding it very difficult to work around this, sometimes he'll eat the food I cook for us, but mostly he wants to go out, and expects me to eat with him. Lately I've been refusing, but this means going most of the day fasting or only eating small snacks until we get home (we stay out most of the time), or making him eat awardly by himself while I just sit there. Help please, any suggestions are welcome
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Replies

  • Maxxitt
    Maxxitt Posts: 1,281 Member
    I travel on holiday and face the eating out challenge quite a bit. What seems to help me is tending toward grilled rather than "sauced" entrees, substituting steamed vegetables for the pilaf or potato or whatever the starchy options are, drinking water as beverage much of the time, and refusing to feel guilty about leaving some on the plate. If there is a place that has decent grilled fish or shellfish, I opt for that much of the time, too.
  • smh_cliff
    smh_cliff Posts: 146 Member
    Pick the places that have the lighter options. It's possible.
  • Gracie12311
    Gracie12311 Posts: 44 Member
    Honestly, I’d ask him to eat at home more. I understand loving to eat out and try different places, but food can be just as good (if not better) at home. And if he wants to go out for the social aspect, I can definitely relate to that. Just find things to do that don’t revolve around food. I feel it should be an equal partnership and if one person has a particular goal in mind at the moment, then the other person can really help and support. There will be several examples of this over the years with your husband, and it’s a give and take. I’m certain he’ll need your support in something at some point which will mean a sacrifice on your part. It’s normal and healthy and I really believe this is one example of that.
  • TorStar80
    TorStar80 Posts: 252 Member
    Maybe he enjoys the social aspect of it... it might not be about the food itself as much as enjoying people watching or just being surrounded by people.. maybe suggest an alternative activity? Or compromise on how many times you go out.
  • rugratz2015
    rugratz2015 Posts: 593 Member
    Try and compromise, eating at home more often. Maybe do some sums and tell him you can reach goals quicker if you eat at home (e.g. Upgrade cars) and when you do go out choose lighter options like grilled meat/fish and veg/salad.
  • nowine4me
    nowine4me Posts: 3,985 Member
    Pick your battles and meals wisely.
  • debtay123
    debtay123 Posts: 1,327 Member
    naw no divorce- just compromise- he may really enjoy eating out- MOST chain restaurants have the menu calorie counters online- so figure out where you want to go- then during the day- find a couple of light options that you can enjoy- many times it may be a seafood or veggie entree- then eat half and have the waiter put the other half in a box even before it gets to the table or order a lunch portion- I remember being newly wed and the fun to" eating out" You tow can DO this thing!- YOU have to make the healthy choice for "yourself"
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Compromise and set a number of times to eat out each week. The rest of the time eat at home.
    Plan meals together. Get a new cookbook of a favorite type of food and work through it together for fun.
    Save more calories for the meals out.
    Find something on the menu you can fit in your goals. There are decent choices at most restaurants if you think about it.
  • rickiimarieee
    rickiimarieee Posts: 2,212 Member
    My advice is to save calories for that meal out and look for the healthier version of the menu. Some have calories on the menu, if it does search it up they more than likely have it on their website! I also only eat half the meal because there's always more than just one serving on your plate so I eat half and the other half I put in a to go box and save it for later or tomorrow
  • rickiimarieee
    rickiimarieee Posts: 2,212 Member
    callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »
    Learn to cook.

    Seriously. Anything I can get at a restaurant (that i would order) I can make BETTER, healthier, and far less expensively at home.

    that said, i lost 80 pounds when i was with my ex, and we ate out almost every day. It was typically my only meal of the day and I worked out as well. So it can be done.

    I am glad my fiance prefers eating at home - for the cost savings AND better taste and nutrition.

    Same. Most food I can cook better than restaurants unless it's something I'm not super familiar with like Chinese food. But really anything I can cook better and I'm able to measure my food and weigh it so I know exactly how much I'm getting. My fiancé also prefers eating at home to save money and most restaurants around here don't have much options and we don't really like going out and he likes my cooking a lot more. We're home bodies.
  • Sunnybrooke99
    Sunnybrooke99 Posts: 369 Member
    edited October 2017
    It might be more the expertise of having date nights than the actual food. My go to trivia every week w my boyfriend, and his family. I eat before, and maybe steel some of this fries, and have a glass of wine. The focus and fun is on the trivia. We also sometimes go to comedy clubs, and sports watch parties.
  • Lesscookies
    Lesscookies Posts: 48 Member
    Search up food blogs or watch the food network for inspirational ideas. I often like to copy chat foods that I've eaten at restaurants and that I love. I go ok YouTube or other sites, and try to maid that same dish. Just today I made an Indian dish I fell in love with while at an Indian buffet.

    Good luck!! and much blessings in this marriage of yours.
  • MegaMooseEsq
    MegaMooseEsq Posts: 3,118 Member
    I gained a lot of weight after meeting my now-husband, and the fact that he loved to eat out certainly contributed. I really had to just take control of my diet myself - when I go out, I get an appetizer or only eat half an entree. I keep food at home that I like to eat, so if he wants to get fast food on the way home or delivery, I usually pass. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you have to eat the same things. But I do get that it’s easy to slip into those bad habits when you want to spend time with someone you love.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    _super_sarah_ wrote: »
    Really trying to find balance, I just got married to someone who loves to eat out. I'm finding it very difficult to work around this, sometimes he'll eat the food I cook for us, but mostly he wants to go out, and expects me to eat with him. Lately I've been refusing, but this means going most of the day fasting or only eating small snacks until we get home (we stay out most of the time), or making him eat awardly by himself while I just sit there. Help please, any suggestions are welcome

    Why can't you eat a healthy breakfast and/or lunch? Why is it necessary for you to "fast" during the day?

  • sksk1026
    sksk1026 Posts: 215 Member
    At the restaurant, you could eat a starter and a small soup. Or always order fish without the carb and ask for extra veg. Have water only. Then you can eat while he eats and your calorie count won't be extreme. Even better you might be able to find restaurants that list their meals' calories.
  • Rickster1967
    Rickster1967 Posts: 485 Member
    If you know which restaurant you're going to in advance, you could call them and ask whether they can accomodate your needs, count the calories for you...

    this might not work with chain restaurants but if it's a local business owner run place I'm sure they'd want to do their best - it's good business practice
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