Temptation - does it ever get easier?

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Niki_Fitz
Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
edited October 2017 in Health and Weight Loss
Does constantly being around temptation EVER get easier?

I'm six months into this and I still have trouble around my family's snacks and takeout. I expected that once I had some success it might get easier but - maybe I'm at a low point here - but it hasn't gotten easier, in fact I am exhausted from cooking wholesome meals with additions for their tastes, only to have them order takeout or hardly touch the food and pull out cheese and crackers then pints of Ben and Jerrys afterwards.

I've got 6-10 lbs to go and need some new strategies, or some ways to shift my mindset around the situation. Thanks for any suggestions.

Replies

  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,523 Member
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    Calories in/calories out. Abstaining from food you LIKE to eat usually ends in failure. If you ACCOUNT for those calories and stay in control of HOW MUCH YOU EAT, you can still have it. I usually eat a .5 cup of Ben and Jerry's everyday. It's 300 calories I account for by tempering the rest of my eating through the day.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
    edited October 2017
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    ninerbuff wrote: »
    Calories in/calories out. Abstaining from food you LIKE to eat usually ends in failure. If you ACCOUNT for those calories and stay in control of HOW MUCH YOU EAT, you can still have it. I usually eat a .5 cup of Ben and Jerry's everyday. It's 300 calories I account for by tempering the rest of my eating through the day.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png

    So a matter of working more on moderation, would you say? Did it take you to time master the art of stopping after just 1/2 cup? Some foods have "no brakes" for me... B&Js is sometimes one of them. Suggestions?
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10604863/of-refeeds-and-diet-breaks/p1

    The entire long conversation, except for my flip contribution, is worth your close attention. Read it.
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,967 Member
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    I personally don’t really eat different. I make the same meals as I always have I just adjust my portions. So my family is not affected. One thing I do differently is I cut out all snacks and sometimes breakfast, although not lately. Saving all my calories for meals only really helps me. Portion out your Ben and Jerry’s in a cup/small bowl and put the rest away.
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
    edited October 2017
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    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10604863/of-refeeds-and-diet-breaks/p1

    The entire long conversation, except for my flip contribution, is worth your close attention. Read it.

    I had read that thread! It's a good one. And my more successful weeks actually ARE the ones when I hit a lower calorie goal five out of seven days, so thanks for bringing this up. It's a challenge returning to the lower CI/CO after the higher days. I can definitely keep at this though. Maybe if I'm more deliberate about it, instead of accidentally having refeed days, it could help.

  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
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    Does constantly being around temptation EVER get easier?

    I'm six months into this and I still have trouble around my family's snacks and takeout. I expected that once I had some success it might get easier but - maybe I'm at a low point here - but it hasn't gotten easier, in fact I am exhausted from cooking wholesome meals with additions for their tastes, only to have them order takeout or hardly touch the food and pull out cheese and crackers then pints of Ben and Jerrys afterwards.

    I've got 6-10 lbs to go and need some new strategies, or some ways to shift my mindset around the situation. Thanks for any suggestions.
    To me, this sounds like more like a communication/routine/respect issue than a pure temptation issue.

    If you cook for your family, they should eat it, and not spend the family's money on junk food instead.

    Either let each person take care of their own meals, or sit down and talk to them, come up with a meal plan where everybody feels that they have a say, at least sometimes, in what gets on the table, and the food is eaten.

    These are really useful ideas. I may have to have them literally write down meals we can all agree on that we enjoy.
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
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    Sharon_C wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    Calories in/calories out. Abstaining from food you LIKE to eat usually ends in failure. If you ACCOUNT for those calories and stay in control of HOW MUCH YOU EAT, you can still have it. I usually eat a .5 cup of Ben and Jerry's everyday. It's 300 calories I account for by tempering the rest of my eating through the day.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png

    So a matter of working more on moderation, would you say? Did it take you to time master the art of stopping after just 1/2 cup? Some foods have "no brakes" for me... B&Js is sometimes one of them. Suggestions?

    I did. I make a point to never deny myself a food I want provided it fits into my calories for the day.

    One of my tricks is to put whatever I am eating in a bowl or on a plate. I never eat out of a bag or package. So I put the recommended serving amount (I weigh my food) into the bowl or plate, repackage and put away the rest. When I finish the bowl I don't get any more. If I cheat and fill the bowl again, I have time to think about my choices because I have to get up, pull out the packaging, fill the bowl and eat it. By that time I don't want another serving because I've talked myself out of it.

    I also taught myself to not eat mindlessly. Meaning I don't eat in front of the TV, while driving, or other distractions. It's just me and the food. I take time to enjoy what I'm eating and really savor it. When I do that I don't look down at my plate and wonder where the food went because I remember eating it. Too many times we're stuffing our face in front of the TV and don't even know what we're eating and that's why we're not satisfied and want more.

    I have been known to eat a brownie and tell my kids not to talk to me while I'm eating it because I know this is the only brownie I'm going to get for awhile and I want to enjoy it. They laugh at me but they leave me alone and let me enjoy my brownie.

    Another trick that I did at the beginning but that I don't need to do anymore: If I really, REALLY want that second serving I tell myself I can have it in 10 minutes. 100% of the time I don't want it 10 minutes later. But knowing that I can have it if I want, knowing I just need to wait 10 minutes, is enough for me. Sometimes I think we need to let our stomachs catch up with our minds and that 10 minutes gives us that time to catch up.

    This is mindful eating for the win. So it CAN get easier? You give me hope.
  • FlowerPower8579
    FlowerPower8579 Posts: 25 Member
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    YES! -once you are in control of it, it won't be so much of a temptation! It's important to allow yourself a little treat here and there I reckon, just my opinion. -otherwise you're more likely to crash under the intense longing for that sweet sugary stuff... but yes.. It does get easier!!!
  • davidylin
    davidylin Posts: 228 Member
    edited October 2017
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    Temptation will always be there, the bigger question is how much space it will take up in your life. The larger you grow your life, temptation will take up less and less proportional space in it.

    Sometimes I'll give into temptation. But it'll just be one scoop of ice cream that gets dutifully logged and 130 calories go into my balance that I'll take care of that day or later.
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,345 Member
    edited October 2017
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    I'm in 4th year of maintenance and I can truly only say its in the last 2 years that I have been able to say no to tempting things if that meant going over my calories. It definately gets easier. Personally I prefer being slim/fit and don't think that many calorie dense foods are worth the calories...but then I'm one of those people who can be content with 1 square of chocolate per day...
  • VeggieBarbells
    VeggieBarbells Posts: 175 Member
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    Does constantly being around temptation EVER get easier?

    I'm six months into this and I still have trouble around my family's snacks and takeout. I expected that once I had some success it might get easier but - maybe I'm at a low point here - but it hasn't gotten easier, in fact I am exhausted from cooking wholesome meals with additions for their tastes, only to have them order takeout or hardly touch the food and pull out cheese and crackers then pints of Ben and Jerrys afterwards.

    I've got 6-10 lbs to go and need some new strategies, or some ways to shift my mindset around the situation. Thanks for any suggestions.

    @wellnesschaser - For me I did some mental math. I can eat everything, nothing is excluded but I and only I, make the choice no-one else. This made for a good starting point.

    I then went on to identify my trigger foods? Like you ice cream is a dangerous one and I will not be happy until the whole tub is gone. Do I still eat ice cream, yep you bet but I buy a smaller size or I buy my normal size, eat the frigging lot and work my *kitten* off at the gym. That works too.

    Generally I think its unfair to expect everyone else to fall in with your new way of eating. It doesn't happen at work or anywhere else, so its really hard to expect the whole family to jump on board just because you've decided to clean up your act. This is (or at least should be) about you.

    I never snack, like never. If I'm hungry I eat a main meal, you'll soon see a difference. Could that work in your household? I dunno - but I wouldn't put pressure on them, they should come to their own conclusion based on the good example you set.

    I was introduced to healthy eating by a vegetarian (yep I blame them for everything) :) She'd cook her meals and added whatever I wanted. Over a long period of time, my taste buds changed and I became interested in what she ate. That to me is the normal process and it doesn't involve any pressure on you or your family.

    @Sharon_c makes some great points - the 20 minute rule(she said 10 min) was introduced to me by the very same vegetarian (now you'll get my blame game) :) To this day, I still use it....

    The TV thing is hilarious, I read somewhere the bigger the TV the fatter the person. In other words we eat mindlessly. Good job I watch everything online on my laptop screen. And I love the 'eat everything out of a plate / bowl' mentality.

    Going full loop, is it temptation? In my world at least, since nothing is excluded I am not depriving myself. I know which foods I will pig out too and so I don't buy them. If I want alcohol, ice cream, chocolate etc I then wait a day or two, if I still crave them, I put an extra shift in at the gym. If I still crave it, OK I'll satisfy the craving and move on.

    Oh and finally, if none of our collective suggestions work - fire the family and hire a new one. That's a little more tricky but do-able. Good luck. :)

  • Janice6543
    Janice6543 Posts: 92 Member
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    I lack restraint when junk food is in the house. If the husband wants some chips, he'll stash them in his office and eat them after I go to bed. I'm allergic to nuts, so if I buy baked goods or ice cream for the family, I'll buy with nuts.

    I do find it helpful to pre-log junk food and weigh out a 100 g portion of chips etc. The worst thing you can do is hunker down in front of the TV with an entire bag.

    I do all the cooking for the family. I would be happy with kale salad, quinoa or similar for dinner but the kid won't eat it. I compromise with stuff like BBQ chicken, meatballs, rice or pasta and her favorite veggies. I bring my weird health food stuff to work and eat for lunch.
  • ripper4998
    ripper4998 Posts: 5 Member
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    Sharon_C wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    Calories in/calories out. Abstaining from food you LIKE to eat usually ends in failure. If you ACCOUNT for those calories and stay in control of HOW MUCH YOU EAT, you can still have it. I usually eat a .5 cup of Ben and Jerry's everyday. It's 300 calories I account for by tempering the rest of my eating through the day.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png

    So a matter of working more on moderation, would you say? Did it take you to time master the art of stopping after just 1/2 cup? Some foods have "no brakes" for me... B&Js is sometimes one of them. Suggestions?

    I did. I make a point to never deny myself a food I want provided it fits into my calories for the day.

    One of my tricks is to put whatever I am eating in a bowl or on a plate. I never eat out of a bag or package. So I put the recommended serving amount (I weigh my food) into the bowl or plate, repackage and put away the rest. When I finish the bowl I don't get any more. If I cheat and fill the bowl again, I have time to think about my choices because I have to get up, pull out the packaging, fill the bowl and eat it. By that time I don't want another serving because I've talked myself out of it.

    I also taught myself to not eat mindlessly. Meaning I don't eat in front of the TV, while driving, or other distractions. It's just me and the food. I take time to enjoy what I'm eating and really savor it. When I do that I don't look down at my plate and wonder where the food went because I remember eating it. Too many times we're stuffing our face in front of the TV and don't even know what we're eating and that's why we're not satisfied and want more.

    I have been known to eat a brownie and tell my kids not to talk to me while I'm eating it because I know this is the only brownie I'm going to get for awhile and I want to enjoy it. They laugh at me but they leave me alone and let me enjoy my brownie.

    Another trick that I did at the beginning but that I don't need to do anymore: If I really, REALLY want that second serving I tell myself I can have it in 10 minutes. 100% of the time I don't want it 10 minutes later. But knowing that I can have it if I want, knowing I just need to wait 10 minutes, is enough for me. Sometimes I think we need to let our stomachs catch up with our minds and that 10 minutes gives us that time to catch up.

    Love this
  • jwcanfield
    jwcanfield Posts: 192 Member
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    You really want a straight answer? No. It never gets easier for most foodies. Maybe I'm not normal, but if it got easier none of the stories of losing weight and then gaining it back would happen. For me acceptance that I can never relax (and I know all about moderation, portion control, distraction techniques, ...) is MY normal.
  • lili200
    lili200 Posts: 200 Member
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    I allow myself a treat once a week. This treat is legitimate and taste better after I’ve been waiting all week.
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
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    jwcanfield wrote: »
    You really want a straight answer? No. It never gets easier for most foodies. Maybe I'm not normal, but if it got easier none of the stories of losing weight and then gaining it back would happen. For me acceptance that I can never relax (and I know all about moderation, portion control, distraction techniques, ...) is MY normal.

    Awesome.
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
    edited October 2017
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    davidylin wrote: »
    Temptation will always be there, the bigger question is how much space it will take up in your life. The larger you grow your life, temptation will take up less and less proportional space in it.

    .

    Love this ^


    jwcanfield wrote: »
    You really want a straight answer? No. It never gets easier for most foodies. Maybe I'm not normal, but if it got easier none of the stories of losing weight and then gaining it back would happen. For me acceptance that I can never relax (and I know all about moderation, portion control, distraction techniques, ...) is MY normal.

    This may be me, too.
    Does constantly being around temptation EVER get easier?

    I'm six months into this and I still have trouble around my family's snacks and takeout. I expected that once I had some success it might get easier but - maybe I'm at a low point here - but it hasn't gotten easier, in fact I am exhausted from cooking wholesome meals with additions for their tastes, only to have them order takeout or hardly touch the food and pull out cheese and crackers then pints of Ben and Jerrys afterwards.

    I've got 6-10 lbs to go and need some new strategies, or some ways to shift my mindset around the situation. Thanks for any suggestions.

    @wellnesschaser - For me I did some mental math. I can eat everything, nothing is excluded but I and only I, make the choice no-one else.

    Yes to this ^ and so many other suggestions here. Yep including firing the family bahaha.
  • Johns_Dope_AF
    Johns_Dope_AF Posts: 460 Member
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    Flexible dieting changed everything for me. I have whatever I want as long as I fit it in. This actually makes me stay away from lots of junk because even though I can fit it in, I probably will choose against it. Its not worth a brownie messing up the rest of my day eating.