What do I want more?

SisterSueGetsFit

What do I want more? Do I want to lose weight or do I want the cheeseburger? Do I want to get back into my smaller pants or do I want the wine? I have to ask myself questions like this on a daily basis. When I first started out I wanted so many things. But mostly I didn't want to be fat anymore. I wanted to be wanted. I wanted to be healthy. I wanted to be a participant in my own life. I did really well for about 15 months and then slowly let about 20 of the 60 pounds I'd lost creep back on. I'd lost my job, I was a bit depressed and I was living a pretty relaxing life at a lake house. I stopped asking myself what I wanted more. Or more accurately, I stopped answering myself.

Well, I'm back at it the best I can be. I'm asking the right questions, and for the most part, giving the right answers. I'm trying not to be as restrictive as I was the first time around, while at the same time keeping enough self discipline to not go completely haywire.

My problem today? I really, really want a glass of wine. I could make it fit in my calories (I'm being flexible, keeping it between 1200-1500) but I'm not sure that's the answer for me. Alcohol is a trigger for me and I'm not good with "just one glass," I'm more about "just one bottle." Plus I have a date tomorrow where I know I'll have a drink (or two). So while the question of what I want more tonight may be a bit more difficult than usual, I'm hoping I have enough strength to come up with the right answer. Because as much as I want that glass of wine, I want to wear those skinny jeans more.

generallyme2

I know how that feels. Good job on being aware of it. I try to remind myself that it's not going anywhere- if I want that wine/ice cream/cookie/etc it'll be there tomorrow. Usually I don't, sometimes I do.

I do have dessert nearly every night though haha, it fits in my cals and helps me feel like it's the end of my day (with tea of course)

KANGOOJUMPS

In for wine.

Keto_N_Iron

Me too! Wine please

SisterSueGetsFit

generallyme2 wrote: »

I know how that feels. Good job on being aware of it. I try to remind myself that it's not going anywhere- if I want that wine/ice cream/cookie/etc it'll be there tomorrow. Usually I don't, sometimes I do.

I do have dessert nearly every night though haha, it fits in my cals and helps me feel like it's the end of my day (with tea of course)

I have a couple spoonful's of Halo Top almost every night too. Pecans and waffles (or something and waffles) is my new favorite. Oh, and my tea too.

tulips_and_tea

Good for you for being so self-aware. I say focus on your date tomorrow and what you want to wear. Wine will always be around so if you skip it tonight, no big deal. It's the small victories like this that really give us the confidence to be successful long term.

cmriverside

It's much easier for me to maintain my weight without alcohol. Why not just stop altogether?

A whole bottle in one day is a lot for a woman.

SisterSueGetsFit

BZAH10 wrote: »

Good for you for being so self-aware. I say focus on your date tomorrow and what you want to wear. Wine will always be around so if you skip it tonight, no big deal. It's the small victories like this that really give us the confidence to be successful long term.

You are so right. The small victories are what add up to winning the battle. There will be no wine this evening, but there will be whiskey tomorrow.

SisterSueGetsFit

cmriverside wrote: »

It's much easier for me to maintain my weight without alcohol. Why not just stop altogether?

A whole bottle in one day is a lot for a woman.

It's easier for me too, it's just not as fun. I will give it up 80% of the time, which for me is a success. I will not give it up entirely. First, I enjoy wine with my dinner, I enjoy having drinks with my friends and frankly, I enjoy a buzz.

I understand that a bottle of wine may be considered quite a bit for a woman in a day...but it's not that uncommon. Anyway, not here to argue that. I appreciate your comment and COMPLETELY understand it's much easier to lose/maintain without alcohol, but that won't work for me long term so I'm trying to gently and less frequently than before, incorporate it.

busyPK

I ask myself similar questions on a daily basis, If I were you I'd resist the wine tonight, but enjoy the 1-2 glasses you will have on your date tomorrow.

P.S. I don't drink that often, but when I do I love wine and 1 bottle of wine is my style too.

lorrpb

You are asking the right questions. This is what kept me going through weight loss. As you pointed out, when you stop asking or stop caring about the answer that’s when the problems come. Keep it going!

Graelwyn75

Hah, my dilemma lately is usually whether to have a bit of Red Velvet Cake or Dark Belgian Chocolate cake or to have some ferrero roche instead. I have 3 cakes in my cupboard currently because I wanted to try them all out and yeah, I think my boyfriend will be eating a lot of cake next week since I cannot get through them by the use by date. I, however, am not here to lose weight. I am meant to be gaining weight, supposedly, but meh, doesn't mean I should be eating great wads of cake.

SisterSueGetsFit

lorrpb wrote: »

You are asking the right questions. This is what kept me going through weight loss. As you pointed out, when you stop asking or stop caring about the answer that’s when the problems come. Keep it going!

Thank you. My hope is this is what will keep my going. I don’t have to be perfect, I just have to not quit.

SisterSueGetsFit

Graelwyn75 wrote: »

Hah, my dilemma lately is usually whether to have a bit of Red Velvet Cake or Dark Belgian Chocolate cake or to have some ferrero roche instead. I have 3 cakes in my cupboard currently because I wanted to try them all out and yeah, I think my boyfriend will be eating a lot of cake next week since I cannot get through them by the use by date. I, however, am not here to lose weight. I am meant to be gaining weight, supposedly, but meh, doesn't mean I should be eating great wads of cake.

Ummmm, red velvet.

KeepRunningFatboy

I seen this thread, you are asking a very good question. I ask myself that question frequently, meditate on my goals (or visualize them) and post visual reminders in places I am likely to encounter to remind me of what I want most. I also set goals to work towards to keep me moving in the direction I want. I also tell myself, I dont necessarily get what I want, but I do get what I work for.

So Saturday, I will be running a marathon. And in 2 weeks I have another marathon. I also scheduled marathons in March, April and May of 2018. And I scheduled triathlons (IM 70.3) in May and July of 2018. Setting up these goal events keeps me working hard daily on what I want most

Good Luck!

SisterSueGetsFit

KeepRunningFatboy wrote: »

I seen this thread, you are asking a very good question. I ask myself that question frequently, meditate on my goals (or visualize them) and post visual reminders in places I am likely to encounter to remind me of what I want most. I also set goals to work towards to keep me moving in the direction I want. I also tell myself, I dont necessarily get what I want, but I do get what I work for.

So Saturday, I will be running a marathon. And in 2 weeks I have another marathon. I also scheduled marathons in March, April and May of 2018. And I scheduled triathlons (IM 70.3) in May and July of 2018. Setting up these goal events keeps me working hard daily on what I want most

Good Luck!

You are awesome! Good luck to you too!!!

SisterSueGetsFit

I chose to skip the wine last night. Little successes.

KendraS74

I understand completely and admire your tenacity to visualize what you really want the most. Good for you for abstaining from that wine!

81Katz

I stopped drinking entirely. Some for weightloss, health/fitness reasons but mostly because I realized my drinking was entering a pretty crappy and sometimes scary binge drinking phase. I would drink more that I previously ever did and sometimes my goal was "get annihilated drunk." So before it got any worse I made the decision to quit entirely. I'm having a hard time recalling when I actually stopped, I know it was in the summer, but it was *I think*
July so it'll be 3 years this coming July. So much of it became a blur towards the end ...

SisterSueGetsFit

81Katz wrote: »

I stopped drinking entirely. Some for weightloss, health/fitness reasons but mostly because I realized my drinking was entering a pretty crappy and sometimes scary binge drinking phase. I would drink more that I previously ever did and sometimes my goal was "get annihilated drunk." So before it got any worse I made the decision to quit entirely. I'm having a hard time recalling when I actually stopped, I know it was in the summer, but it was *I think*
July so it'll be 3 years this coming July. So much of it became a blur towards the end ...

I quit for a period of time in January of 2016 because I was entering this territory. I knew that if I couldn't quit for 30 days I had a real problem on my hands. I ended up not drinking for about 10 weeks. I felt great but knew it wasn't something I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I slowly started incorporating it back into my life. Anytime I feel it's getting out of hand, I stop again. I'm doing it purely for weight loss this time around. I'm not stopping entirely, but cutting back a great deal. I'll likely go dry in January again, just because it's a good "body reset." I'm glad you found what works for you.