Need to get kids on board

JennyRATL

Hey all!
Looking to make dietary changes for a more healthy lifestyle. In the past, when I've tried to do this, the kids mutiny or I end up making two different meals for the adults and kids. Making big changes, so why add more stress?!

Anyone done this before who has any practical tips and advice for getting kids on board? Or success stories about how you changed your eating habits and how you managed that with kids? Like doing Whole 30 with the whole family type of change? Or going vegetarian? Big changes?

I have two boys, 13 and 10. They are not what I would call picky, but they are resistant to change and aren't eager to try new things. I tend to be an "eat or starve" kind of parent, but try to make sure every meal has something they like, but want to make things easier for myself and get them building better nutrition habits as well.

TIA!

chispaza

My kids are more willing to try things when they've helped grow it or cook it. Your boys are old enough to be in the kitchen with you making dinner.
My daughter also likes to play the game where we blindfold her and give her foods to try and she tries to identify them (my very picky eater son will not try this game though).

hammycakes

start by asking them to make a list of what veggies/fruits they like best, then maybe try one new thing per week (in addition to the things they already like?)
A couple of things I read when my kids were younger- when hungry, they will eat the largest amount of the first item you give them- so sometimes I start with a veggie plate "appetizer" or apple slices or whatever. I shoot for half the plate with fruit/veg, then 1/4 protien and 1/4 starch.
Second, it takes 8-10 tries for kids to accept "new foods" so keep trying.
also, meatloaf/spaghetti sauce: I chop zucchini or spinach up super fine in the food processor and add it in. they never know.

kommodevaran

I don't have kids, but I have been a kid and I have changed my eating habits. (Those changes were pretty drastic, but I eat very normal now - it was the eating habits I changed from, that were extreme.)

My top tips:
Eat family meals, only one meal at the time, which everybdy is supposed to eat.
Avoid mixing things too much, let everyone pick what they like.
Have theme nights through the week - for instance Italian, Mexican, Pizza night, slowcooker, Sunday roast - or different meats, vegs, starches - this creates predictability as well as opens up for more variety.
Let each person choose a dinner per week.
Involve the kids into some of the process, at least shopping and cooking and cleaning up; you'll be able to sneak in meal planning, nutrition and value for money, too, all age appropriately, of course.

JennyRATL

Thanks!
These are good tips, for sure. But I don't think I phrased my question well. They already eat okay, and eat what I feed them, but I'm thinking of trying a meal plan--one like Whole 30 or a couple of others I'm researching that have recipes and whatnot that may be a bit harder for them to get used to or have big adjustments. I'm wondering if anyone has done something like that with kids?
It may just be that I follow the plan and just make the dinner options and put it in front of them! They'll eat if they are hungry enough!

kommodevaran

Whole 30 is an elimination diet, to discover food intolerances, and I'd think your desire is to widen your boys' palates, so I'd suggest NOT picking a "fad" diet plan like that, or vegetarian (a meat free dinner per week is great though). If you want to keep them on board, don't make too many changes at once. YOU are capable of making your own meal plan, and you're the person best suited for that in the whole world - you know your family best, including their preferences and aversions, your schedule and cooking skills, and what foods and ingredients are available in your area.

castell5

When you say you've tried this in the past and end up making 2 different meals, (adult and kids) what exactly does that mean? Healthy for the adults and allowing the kids to eat whatever they want??

I have 3 grown daughters and 7 grand kids, so I have some experience. The kids were always told you can have the "snack" "candy bar" "pop tart" or whatever AFTER you eat something healthy.

I recall going out with another couple and their kids once, we said do you want to stop for pizza for lunch? The mom said she would prefer a diner so they could elect something healthier (this sounds good so far right?) well we went to a diner and everyone chose their own item, the (overweight) son chose grilled cheese and fries... then to my horror, I watched the mom (who had recommended the diner for the healthier option) put BUTTER on the kid's grilled cheese cause that's how he likes it!!!???

The adult parent needs to say what is acceptable and what isn't on a kids diet. If a kid is under the age of 12 and obese, I would say that is either a genetic issue or the parent's fault 100%

Kids don't know anything about nutrition. The parent's just have to know that buttered noodles, grilled cheese and fries, McDonalds, Burger King, etc are not something your kids should be eating often!

Stick to your rule, eat what I gave you or starve, and try to accommodate them to a degree (If they don't like sweet potatoes, don't give them sweet potatoes, skip the potato) But that doesn't mean you can't make a sweet potato for the rest of the family. If one kids doesn't like carrots, make them big is a stew or salad so they can pick them out. Stuff like that but try to make sure they eat balanced and try not to buy them too many sugary items to keep in the house. They don't need cookies every week.

fitoverfortymom

Forcing a diet on kids in unnecessary. Gradually bringing in different foods to try that meet your calorie needs that you can share with the family is a better approach. You can also eat what they eat---just keep it within your calorie goals.

I do the cooking, so my family eats what I eat. That's just how it is. I tell them I'll eat whatever they cook, too, but no one has taken me up on the offer yet.

Inflicting a fad diet on the family is no better for them than it is to you. Assuming you are a meat eater, plan simple meals around meat (protein), a veggie, and a starch. There are endless combinations of those three food types. A splash of oil (for your fat) and you are good to go.

A week of meals at our house will be something like:

• Grilled chicken tenders, roasted green beans (with olive oil, sea salt, paprika), and rice (made in rice cooker)
• Beef tacos with shredded lettuce, tomatoes, black olives, cheese and light sour cream on whole grain taco shells
• Turkey pizza burgers with mozz cheese and pizza sauce, oven fries (from frozen), and steamed broccoli (eta: I usually skip the bun or have half the bun, depending on my calories for the day)
• Egg fried rice with riced cauliflower for half the rice, includes pea/carrot frozen veggie mix and shredded cabbage + Asian sauce/seasonings
• Fast food night (usually Chick Fil A or Chipotle). We are a BUSY family, a night out per week is practically unavoidable
• Soup/Chili slow cooker meal; typically a bag of frozen veggies with protein, seasoning, beans/lentils/rice
• DIY Pizza. Pre-made crusts and you can control the sauce and toppings to meet your calorie goals, and everyone can choose their own toppings

It's real food that everyone in the family eats together, and I can serve it in portions that meet my calorie goals.

ew_david

If I chose to do that diet, I would in no way expect the rest of my family to follow suit.

If it's a matter of incorporating new, whole foods into their diet, it's a matter of trial and error to find out what they like.

Lounmoun

JennyRATL wrote: »

Hey all!
Looking to make dietary changes for a more healthy lifestyle. In the past, when I've tried to do this, the kids mutiny or I end up making two different meals for the adults and kids. Making big changes, so why add more stress?!

Anyone done this before who has any practical tips and advice for getting kids on board? Or success stories about how you changed your eating habits and how you managed that with kids? Like doing Whole 30 with the whole family type of change? Or going vegetarian? Big changes?

I have two boys, 13 and 10. They are not what I would call picky, but they are resistant to change and aren't eager to try new things. I tend to be an "eat or starve" kind of parent, but try to make sure every meal has something they like, but want to make things easier for myself and get them building better nutrition habits as well.

TIA!

Include them, don't just tell them.
They are old enough to learn about nutrition, discuss food choices and make decisions on what to put in their bodies.
They are old enough to help with meal planning and cooking. They are old enough to make a sandwich or get a bowl of cereal if they don't like what you make.
Compromise and try new food once a week to start instead of trying to change everything at once.

JennyRATL

No, not adults eat healthy and kids eat crap or what ever they want. More like, if we are having bean bowls for dinner, I might do white rice for them, and quinoa or brown rice for us, because they prefer white.
I'm not interested in a "fad" diet, but as an example, if I'm following a whole food or healthier meal plan that has a dinner of fish with bok choy one night as part of my plan, do I skip it or make two dinners, because my kids wouldn't touch it? Don't make it at all? Fix them something else? Let's say I want a grilled chicken breast with roasted sweet potatoes for dinner one night. My kids don't eat sweet potatoes, so skip them and just feed them grilled chicken? Make them another side? I see so many recipes that are healthful and look good, but stop short because I think "there is no way they'll eat that"

We don't currently have terrible diets or eat poorly, but I'd like to make some changes and I'm just curious if anyone had done something similar with their kids. I just want to know what may have been successful for others who have made changes.

JennyRATL

And again, this is not "how do I feed my kids better" but rather "how did you go about making changes with kids?"

And by diet, I don't mean "I'm going on a diet and am making them suffer too" but rather, "I'd like to make some improvements and changes that I think my kids might resist but I don't want them eating a bowl of cereal every time I make something they don't like"

I must be terrible at conveying what I mean!

cherys

Hi

I've aimed at this for years with some success. First thing I do is increase veggie portions of the veg they really like. Even if that means serving a lot more sweet corn, carrots and peas, or salads based around iceberg and cucumber - it all helps instill in them an understanding that we need lots of fresh stuff as fuel.

Next I hid a lot of veg in food they liked. So I'd make burgers with pureed spinach, red onion and fennel stirred in with the beef. Amazingly they didn't notice. I kept experimenting with healthier versions of foods they loved (mac n cheese made with quark not white sauce etc) and build it up that way.

I also talked to them a lot about nutrition and asked them which healthy choices they were going to make. It's a slow process...

Need2Exerc1se

Not sure what type of changes you are making but if they are drastic I'd suggest easing into it. Children don't always handle big changes well. Eating healthier isn't something you have to do overnight. Just continually make small changes until you get to a happy place.

Rosemary7391

What my mom used to do was make one meal for everyone; if I wasn't all that keen on a part of it I had to at least eat a bit. If I didn't eat it all I wouldn't be allowed dessert. I'd maybe aim for more than one vegetable with each meal - something the kids will eat and something for them to try?

I just looked at Whole 30... No way. I think I'd have to change every one of my go to meals to do that! That's crazy.

BusyRaeNOTBusty

I wouldn't do Whole 30 with kids. Actually I wouldn't do Whole 30 at all. Just cook good wholesome meals. Always include a vegetable with dinner. Eat smaller portions or skip the carb-side.

kommodevaran

Make sure you don't accidentally, and with the best intentions, get sucked into a fad diet - nobody calls their diet "faddy", but "whole food or healthier meal plan" can be just as overambitious. Normal foods are good enough - just aim for variety. You can combine any protein with any starch with any veg - as fitoverfortymom showed you. Some compromise is necessary, like Lounmoun said - and some degree of choice can make your kids feel more relaxed, and it's important to feel that their voices are heard - don't try to accomodate to every whim, but be flexible - sometimes make brown and white rice, sometimes make bok choy and green beans. Have you tried different preparations? I, for instance, dislike sweet potatoes in all other forms than mashed, but that is something I love. If you always have bread in the house, that's an emergency item that can be eaten with anything.

ladyhusker39

I'm having a little trouble trouble getting your meaning but after your last comment I think maybe you're just looking for ways to get your kids to try new things that you might like to try out. It doesn't have to do with eating better or anything drastic, just different which kids can be resistant to.

If that's what you mean I totally get that it can be tricky. I'm thinking that since your kids are older maybe you can include them in the choices of new things to try. Like maybe you can talk to them about the big picture of what you're wanting to do and get their input into how you might all be able to do it. If you come to then with the idea of what you want to do and ask them to help you figure out how to get it done, you might be able to get more buy in. At least to the idea. You all can work together to figure out the details.

I always try to think about what I ultimately want to accomplish when I'm making changes within our family life. When I find myself stuck in a dilemma like this, I'll just ask everyone what they think and will they help me figure it out. This would also require you to be more open to doing it a little different than you might want to, but it turns it from something you want to do to something we're all doing together.

In my opinion it's ok to tell them that we're going to make some changes and you want their input if they'd like to get it, but if they don't then that's ok too, but we're still going to do it. This is so they can understand that what's on the table is how to make the changes not whether or not changes are going happen.

This seems a little rambling and may not be at all the advice you're looking for, but I'm just trying to spitball some ideas based on my possibly incorrect assumptions.

Good luck.

deputy_randolph

Do your kids have weight issues? Do they eat a balanced diet already? Are they active? Do they really need to "get on board" for their health?

You are the parent and control the finances and food that comes into the home. If you are cooking, you have control over meal planning.

I'm an "eat what I made" or "eat what you make" kind on parent. If the kids don't like your dinner, there is no reason that a 10 and 13 year old can't make their own dinners. Provide healthy options, like nut butters, fruit, veggies, cheese...and they can figure out something to eat...or eat the dinner you make.

ETA: I just saw your last post. Don't want them to eat cereal for dinner? Don't buy it.

Lounmoun

Big change- my parent had a heart bypass and stayed with us several weeks while recovering. Had to start a low sodium diet immediately for shared meals at least. This was a change that meant the health of a family member not trying a fad diet or something we could ease into.
I got some complaints that things were different. I tried to find low sodium recipes that were tasty, used more herbs, let people add salt to their individual dish. We didn't stick with it after my parent went home but still use some low sodium recipes and I use less salt than I used to. It would have been easier to start with one day a week with different foods and changing more slowly. If you don't have to make a drastic change to your whole family's diet then don't. Make small changes.
If you'd like to try some big change for yourself then suck it up and make your food separately unless the rest want to try it too.

Pepsab

Yes i do this but to make it easier on everyone i tend to make one meal 5 nights that we all eat. 2 nights i just feed the kids an easy unhealthy dinner (chicken nuggets & fries, mac cheese etc) and hubby and i will have a nicer meal just the two of us of something i know the kids wouldn't really eat. (spicy, curry etc) or like you said on those nights ill have sweet potato or seafood...

callsitlikeiseeit

my son is very picky. he eats what i make or he doesnt eat. once or twice a week ill make something i know he likes and eats well ( usually home made french bread pizza)

he might not eat much, but ill be damned if im making 2 dinners.

jemhh

Brown rice is not healthier than white rice.

In my house we have 3 or 4 dishes at each dinner. Each of the three of us eat varying amounts of each. My husband will not eat the vegetables most nights and my daughter does not usually eat the starchy food. I would never make a meal where there weren't at least two things that each person liked but I also don't worry about them liking everything.

Idontcareyoupick

My rule is that you have to at least try it. So add in 1 new thing at a time and make them at least try it.

jgnatca

My good friend involved her grandchildren by giving each one a dinner night. Creativity. Control. And a child is much more invested to try new things if they made it. She also had fruit pizza and kabob nights when the children built their own.

The family’s favourite dinner? They call it “Yellow Dinner” where all the foods are yellow. One of the kids creations.

My friend fostered several children with special dietary needs so she knows what she’s doing. (Diabetes, history of food hoarding).

I just remembered another technique. She keeps a bowl of attractive fruit out at all times. Free and accessible snacking.

I also wouldn’t try a restrictive diet with children. It’s all about introducing new foods and building a colourful plate.

Cbean08

If you want your kids to try new things, then stop assuming what they will and won't eat. Just because they tried it once and didn't like it does not mean they won't ever like it. It could have been how it was prepared before or the seasonings or just the mood the kid was in.

Make the foods you want the family to eat and they'll figure it out eventually. Even if all your kid eats for dinner a couple nights a week is chicken because he didn't like the side, nothing bad will happen. Or, if you insist he must have a side, offer a piece of fruit or toast or something easy.

But give your kids the opportunity to try and decline the food multiple times before you believe that they really don't like it.

Spiderpug

I have 3 teen boys - i did a grradual intro of 'everyone' meals at 1 a week. Also swapping stuff like jar sauce to homemade on fav meals. They have homemade burgers and pizza but salad comes with it now!
Don't aim to chnge too much too soon, it's easier to have them onside than against you, two of mine actually help cook now

kenyonhaff

Humans have a tendency to balk at any big changes... especially ones that are very personal, such as eating habits.

But you only have to make a bunch of relatively small changes for big effect. And it does not have to mean "giving up" anything (unless it's an allergy). Just changing a few things make a big difference.

For example, I learned several things about my own eating habits that I am working on changing with my own 10 year old and my husband:

* Portion sizes. There's a healthy serving of pizza, and then there's over-sized portions that are just too much and really gluttonous. Have a slice (or two) and eat some light Caesar salad, instead. But yes, we will have pizza.

* Kid-friendly foods can be healthy. Pizza? Make it thinner crust and get some veggies in there? Mac and cheese? Sure, just watch portion sizes. Tacos? Yes please! Load up the salsa, lean beef, chicken, or fish, and light cheese or sour cream.

* Don't make eating a fight. If you don't want your kids munching on potato chips, don't make them a regular food in the house. Kids will eat healthier snacks simply because there's no other choice. Another tactic: Don't like dinner? That's OK. Make YOURSELF (as in any kid over the age of 5) a peanut butter sandwich. Don't like the veggie? Help yourself to a carrot. But you aren't going to whip up something else.

* Good food is healthy food. I was pleasantly surprised to find my son really loves some of the food I ate a lot on MFP. Turns out hard-boiled eggs are a favorite. He loves fresh fish with some lemon pepper. I have trouble keeping cheddar rice cakes in stock in the pantry.

kenyonhaff

Oh, also: no one food is actually mandatory to eat healthy. It's OK if your kids (or you) hate kale or cottage cheese. You don't have to eat them.

Stick with foods people actually like, in a form they like them. Canned spinach? Blech. Fresh spinach in a salad? Yum.

maryannprt

I have 2 (now adult) children who eat anything and everything. We had 2 rules about food. You have to have a "tasting bite" of everything, even if you've eaten it before and think you don't like it. Other than a tasting bite, you don't have to eat anything, all you need to say is no, thank you, I'm not going to nag or force you, but Mom's not cooking something else. I'm not saying a kid didn't eat just corn, or rice or a few 1 item meals, but I always had multiple things on the table for dinner, no one starved, neither of them are obese, and they are willing to try anything.

cherys

jemhh wrote: »

Brown rice is not healthier than white rice.

Really? I thought it had more nutrients and fibre and even more protein in it so was more nutrionally valuable wieght for weight. Is that wrong?