Losing weight with bipolar disorder

thirdworldblair

Hi everyone! I’m Blair from the Philippines, 23 years old. My boyfriend recently got hooked on this app and so I decided to start using it as well.

I’ve never been at an ideal weight all my life, but I was fairly active about four years ago. I climbed mountains at least once a month and ran laps around my village at least once a week. Over the years though, I stopped being active and started overeating. I also started drinking a lot. I battled through major depression for about four years and gained a significant amount of weight. From 130 lbs, I’m now at 225.

When I got officially diagnosed with type 2 bipolar disorder last year, I was warned by my psychiatrist that my antipsychotics will cause even more weight gain. That was to say the least prophetic. The mood swings did not help — when sad, I’ll succumb to ordering fast food. I also started partying a lot and drinking a lot again recently.

Last month, I quit my job even though I loved the actual work because my small non-profit was run by a very difficult man. It wasn’t worth sacrificing my mental health over. I have to say that I left college in 2015 because of this and I’ve gotten accepted to start over at a new one on January.

In light of starting over, I want to give this weight loss project a shot once and for all. I’m so hurt and damaged by everything I have been through but I think it’s about time I take loving and caring for myself seriously.

I know this will be hard. Being bipolar means I am given to rapid cycling and I can be motivated then turn depressed in a matter of minutes. For those of you battling with mental health problems as well, how do you stick to your routine and practice self care and patience through this journey?

Thank you.

thirdworldblair

Feel free to add me! I could use some friends

COGypsy

I think the first thing that you have to do is decide whether you're going to be Blair that has a medical condition or whether you're going to be a Bipolar called Blair. It's really a huge distinction. You can sit on your duff your whole life and blame it on bipolar or you can decide to do live your life and manage your condition. I was diagnosed with BPII, ultra rapid cycling about 15 years ago. It was really rough until I found my medication cocktail that worked for me. Once I got myself stable though, I made a conscious decision that I was never going to "be" bipolar. It's simply something that I have, not something that I am. I find it fascinating that people will say, "I'm bipolar", but no one ever says "I'm cancer" or "I'm migraines". Seriously....you're Blair. You're a daughter, a girlfriend, a college student and a million other wonderful things, I'm sure....is a disease really the identity you're going to take on over things like that?

I know it sounds like semantics, but once you make that shift in your mind, it becomes much easier to take care of yourself and create the habits and routines that you need, not only for weight loss, but to manage your bipolar disorder. If I define myself as "sick", then it's hard to believe there's any point in taking care of myself. If I go down the road of, "well, I'm bipolar and meds make me fat" then it's no problem at all to just order a pizza and watch Netflix all night. If I choose instead to think, "well, I'm COGypsy and I have a lot to accomplish" then it's much easier to make the effort to plan and eat the food that I need to feel good and get through my day and get to bed at a reasonable hour (note....I'd usually still rather have the pizza ).

Unfortunately, the rest is a lot of trial and error. I've built a lot of habits that are now close to automatic around meal planning and preparation, backup plans for when that doesn't work out, and probably most important--my sleep. I find that establishing habits does a lot to overcome the little ups and downs so that they don't become big ups and downs. It's a habit to get all my food together on Sundays. I get tired at the same time every night because I have my bedtime habit. I check in with my moods if they seem to be lasting too long or coming on too fast. I've learned that I can't rely on things like motivation or willpower, because like you said, with rapid cycling, my motivation can change pretty quickly! You'll figure out what works for you--just decide that your priority (especially at 23!) is to build a fantastic life that is worth taking care of. Choose things that support that life and you'll be in great shape!

thirdworldblair

Hello COGypsy, thank you so much for this wonderful message. You don’t know how much you touched me. Thank you.

Bhartendu6

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Bhartendu6

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