Do you remember things that people tell you?
highwood1968
Posts: 61 Member
For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
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I'm very forgetful. Not intentionally but sometimes I just don't remember. I don't mean to offend by not asking. Like poster above mentioned, do you and don't expect anything. Spare yourself the disappointment.1
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I'm going to get blasted for this I know. But the fact that you're even noticing this and thinking about it concerns me. If I knew a person whose thought process was like this, I would not engage them in any conversation.3
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OP, what you're doing is called being mindful and present. Something many people don't practice anymore because we're all caught up in our own goings-on. This is a pet peeve of mine, as well. Not necessarily others asking me follow up questions, mainly because I'm very private and don't talk about my business.
But, it DOES bother me when I'm talking to someone and I know their mind is elsewhere. That's why I make conscious effort to listen only to the person who is talking to me and not let my mind wander. I figured, I can't get upset with others without practicing it myself.1 -
highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
Depends.
I often don't remember to ask coworker/friend type people specific questions in the moment because I suck at conversation but that doesn't mean I don't remember that they said their grandma was dying. Just means I am kicking myself later that day.
But maybe I just don't want to bring *kitten* up if they don't bring it up first. I mean if I ask how is everything with you and yours and they say "fine" I might assume they don't want to talk about stuff that was bothering them last time we spoke.1 -
highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
I'm a social idiot. It wouldn't occur to me or I would think it was prying and it's none of my business.3 -
highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
what?0 -
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Just one pet peeve of the day? How many do you have in a days span?
But my answer is no.0 -
I am surprised that a few folks would not be bothered by that...to me if something is going on with you whether it be good or bad and you tell a friend about it, would you not expect to be asked about it to see how things are going. To me that shows an interest and concern about others. SOrry but we all know people that in order to keep a conversation going it has to be all about them.....I know a few of those. I know people, that I have known for years, and I know every single thing about their kids/husband and not once have they asked me what is going on in my life, it is always about them.0 -
highwood1968 wrote: »I am surprised that a few folks would not be bothered by that...to me if something is going on with you whether it be good or bad and you tell a friend about it, would you not expect to be asked about it to see how things are going. To me that shows an interest and concern about others. SOrry but we all know people that in order to keep a conversation going it has to be all about them.....I know a few of those. I know people, that I have known for years, and I know every single thing about their kids/husband and not once have they asked me what is going on in my life, it is always about them.
Oh I know people like that as well. It does irk me. I just stop talking to them as much as possible because I can tell that they only want to talk about themselves and I just happen to be the person they are talking at this time. If I start talking about myself as well they all of a sudden have something else to do. My initial answer was directed at more casual acquaintances but a real friend should probably give a crap about your life at least a little bit.3 -
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highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
I have a really good memory and often remember even small details people mention to me.
I often don't bring things up that were previously discussed because I don't want to seem creepy for remembering all the details of people's lives.
I also don't enjoy conversations typically, I feel awkward or am distracted with "what I'd rather be doing".
I like conversing in a text based format much better, I can express myself better and I can focus on the conversation.
I don't get upset if people don't follow up with things I've said...I usually regret giving out any personal info in a conversation, what I'm thinking or feeling. I'm glad to never speak of it again!
Having said that, for the few people I really care about, I do like it when they remember what I say, so follow up is greatly appreciated with them.2 -
highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
Keep in mind people are different. I don't like talking about personal things at work or work things outside of work. If you ask me questions, I'll answer to be polite but I wouldn't reciprocate because that's only going to keep that conversation going.1 -
My memory is one of the best things I have.......and it is one of the reasons I dislike others so much because they say stupid *kitten*.0
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Do I remember what?0
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My memory sucks so bad but I remember conversations with people that matter to me.0
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I don't remember everything I tell myself0
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My memory is terrible. However, if I notice you make a point to remember little things about me, I will always make sure to do the same.1
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Here is an example I was talking to a work friend yesterday and talking about popping in at lunch to visit my sister as her pet passed away the night before and she was upset understandably...so after lunch I was talking to this girl again and she did not say hey how did it go, she said nothing so towards the end of our conversation I commented that I stopped by to see my sister at lunch and she was like how come??? WTF??? This was the same conversation in which I once again asked her how her brother was doing as he had some health issues for the past six months and I every couple of months I make a point to see how he is doing.0
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joemac1988 wrote: »highwood1968 wrote: »For example, if a coworker/friend tells you something that is going on in their life (an event, something about their kids/family, etc.) do you remember and ask them about it later to see what happened, how something is going, etc.?
I always find that I will ask/followup with people so how did this or that turn out, what happened, etc. yet I find that it is rarely reciprocated. SOmetimes it is someone in which I have stated something is happening with me or my family and same conversation they talk about what is going on with them or their family and I always will ask them at a later date how everything went yet I don't get the same in return.
Just a little pet peeve of the day!
Keep in mind people are different. I don't like talking about personal things at work or work things outside of work. If you ask me questions, I'll answer to be polite but I wouldn't reciprocate because that's only going to keep that conversation going.
Yes but these are people that like talking about personal stuff about themselves...as I stated I know all about their kids/pets/husband, etc. but they ask me nothing about my life. When I start to say something it seems like all of a sudden we are back on them.0 -
I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
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caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
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Depends...I've had co-workers in the past who were merely that..co-workers...basically acquaintances...not really "friends" and they would just share TMI relative to our relationship status...this is always awkward and I generally avoid bringing anything up in the future.
My actual friends who I go out and socialize with, etc...absolutely.
Perhaps OP, you are misinterpreting your relationship status with your co-workers.1 -
Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho
Did they atleast contain dollars?0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho
And you didn't even send me any back on my birthday0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho
And you didn't even send me any back on my birthday
I already know what I am getting you for your bday.
I really hope you like roaches.1 -
Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho
Did they atleast contain dollars?caco_ethes wrote: »Big_LittleMomma wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I just like when people are on equal ground with me. Like we remember an equal amount of random things about each other. But if I run into you in target and casually mention that it’s my birthday, don’t be sending me birthday cards for the next three years*. Nobody likes that guy.
*actually happened
That is creepy
Made me uncomfy fo sho
And you didn't even send me any back on my birthday
No dollars in the card, so no givesy backsies.1
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