2018 Non Scale Commitments (New Years Resolutions)
Replies
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Gonna be responding to these soon
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In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
A great supplement to this is to get your skin checked out by a medical professional if you have concerns about specific moles. My family has a history of skin cancer and I finally did it this year. The doctor charted my moles so we could track them going forward, I got one mole removed (it turned out to be benign), and the whole process gave me peace of mind!0 -
HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »Nice ones guys
I dumped my boyfriend today so I'm adding to my commitments list today.
4) I am putting my own interests first. I will value being single and by myself now and focusing on my own personal well being. I refuse to be responsible for someone else's happiness at the cost of my own happiness.
I'm sorry, Kriss. I really really hope 2018 is the complete opposite of 2017 for you.
I think there was a lot of people questioning on if I knew the difference between comments made out of complete ignorance and ones made to be intentionally hurtful.
Lol.. a big sigh of relief around the world. I do.
I am fairly tolerant of people opinions to a point.. even if I find them enraging I will take them in and process it logically.
However the boyfriends last words to me were that my father is scared to talk to me because I am skitzo-*kitten*-phranic. Every time I tried to explain that my dad isn't much of a talker over the phone so he says "uhm" or "uhh" a lot in the process he cut me off and told me to shut up and *kitten* off.
He has a problem with alcohol.. and the reason why I walked out of his life once was because he gets really obnoxious. He is egotistical and can say some hurtful things. He got drunk a few days ago because I shut my phone off and wanted to be alone and canceled our plans.
He told me while I was on the bus to see my dad that he was trying not to commit suicide because he was sad lately and that I was gone. then the next day he was drunk all day again and messaged me and said he was sad and lonely. I called 15 times and he wouldn't answer. I'm 4 hours away.. how would I know if something happened?
When he finally answered.. while I was relieved he was fine.. he was using me being at my father's as a reason to drink cause he had no one to keep him company.
I felt mad cause how can I enjoy spending time with my family while I'm worrying if he's gonna do something? (He had unsuccessfully tried twice years before I met him so it wasn't an over reaction)
But then that whole belittling conversation started. He blamed me for getting him started on the alcohol again.. but just a few days before he told me my binge eating disorder was imaginary and no one was forcing me to eat. So I should just stop paying for placebo pills that don't work and just put some effort in and just not eat.
However this same logic does not apply to him and alcohol and when I asked him about that I got silenced with more shut ups and *kitten* offs.
He told me that he often sneaks into my building and sits outside my apt door and listens but never knocks or tells me he is there. He claims this is to make sure I am still alive. I am his everything. His world. His life.
But he said he loves me and he doesn't know why anymore. I'm never happy. Doesn't understand why he stays in the relationship. He says I'm just staying in it cause I'm scared to be Alone. Then he went on the rant about how losing everything this year is my fault so I should just accept it. And then the stuff about my dad.
So I told him that he is free and it's over. He will probably drink all Christmas.. and won't sober up til his next shift. It won't be until then that he realizes what has happened.
Last time he really regretted it when I walked out.. but I gave him one more chance. There will not be another. I'm not a doormat lol.
The difference is.. I am not existing within the paradigm of his existence.. I don't need to see him every day to avoid feeling alone and depressed. He clearly did. He is going to have a hard time unfortunately.. but I can't keep putting him above myself. I've put on a lot of weight since meeting him and letting him really wear me down mentally. That changes now. I'm not going to be responsible for trying to maintain balance for his alcoholism.
Good for you! Emotional vampires are really draining, aren't they?0 -
JaydedMiss wrote: »eyyyyy krissy mine are all internal me focused and i happen to always be single. twins n *kitten*. Lets do this we got this
Mines focused on minimizing things i dont need and maximizing experiences. I want to say no to stuff i dont need, And yes to things i have no real reason not to do. Focus on keeping my house a calm clean space (and get rid of all the stuff i hoard >.> ) and sort of feel out the scary outer world and stuff. Get some hobbies. Make some friends. Focus on health and nutrition vs just weight loss. Its my year
edit: i made a full google doc of it earlier it seems todays the day to think of this stuff hah. I have year goals and month goals seperated into weeks. I have all year to focus on me why rush. January im having a 2 week challenge of strictly clean (dont gimme the whole what is clean thing we all know what i mean ) for the first 2 weeks of the year. possibly the full month who knows, And 4 parts of sorting and cleaning my house seperated into weekly goals.
Gona be a good month focused on relaxing myself and my space and sort of resetting in health mode after christmas
I like this idea. Goals and a chart and weekly tasks for the year. I think I will do the same!
You and I can think of some challenges to do together and I'll incorporate them into it. It will give me some drive.0 -
My sincere respect, Kriss, for leaving your boyfriend. Sounds like he was trying to make you stay with him out of guilt. That's yet another reason to leave him, on top of his nasty and creepy behaviour.
Bravo yet again for your courage! You've shown it in your wins against BED and obesity, and yet again here.
So proud to know you and see your emergence as a happier person.
Thank you. I must admit while this year has been rough.. I almost feel like the huge emotional draining moments were simply due to him.. 2018 is about change for me. He isn't gonna try and change so I will remove him and change myself and be happier. 3 -
In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
This is a good idea too. I've had to start putting it on after some laser skin treatments but it's probably a daily thing that I could do. I don't tan or go out much in the summer so it's never really crossed my mind but the sun is bad even in short bursts these days0 -
EllieElla2015 wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »Nice ones guys
I dumped my boyfriend today so I'm adding to my commitments list today.
4) I am putting my own interests first. I will value being single and by myself now and focusing on my own personal well being. I refuse to be responsible for someone else's happiness at the cost of my own happiness.
So happy for you!! The best thing I ever did for myself was stop prioritizing my boyfriends schedule over my own. He got to do all his errands and hobbies and I didn’t. That’s not a way to live and I’m happy you’re taking control again
I think that's why we never matched well in most things. I am a home body.. I don't mind going out and doing stuff but he wanted to go and do something every day.. even if it was just to walk around the grocery store or something.. I enjoy my alone time and don't desire to be on the go constantly.0 -
janejellyroll wrote: »In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
A great supplement to this is to get your skin checked out by a medical professional if you have concerns about specific moles. My family has a history of skin cancer and I finally did it this year. The doctor charted my moles so we could track them going forward, I got one mole removed (it turned out to be benign), and the whole process gave me peace of mind!
Yes.. it's probably a good idea. People always ask me about this mole on my ear etc.. and honestly I didn't even know it was there and haven't really paid much mind.0 -
HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
A great supplement to this is to get your skin checked out by a medical professional if you have concerns about specific moles. My family has a history of skin cancer and I finally did it this year. The doctor charted my moles so we could track them going forward, I got one mole removed (it turned out to be benign), and the whole process gave me peace of mind!
Yes.. it's probably a good idea. People always ask me about this mole on my ear etc.. and honestly I didn't even know it was there and haven't really paid much mind.
Yeah, the one I got removed was on my back and I knew it was there, but it always freaked me out because I couldn't see it well and I was worried I would miss a danger sign.
My non-scale commitment for New Years is to really, truly, and honestly aim for at least seven hours of sleep per night. There are occasions due to my job where it really isn't possible, but except for that, I want to make it happen. Not just the "uh, I'm done with my book and there's nothing on TV so I'm going to get seven hours of sleep tonight" method I've been using in 2017.0 -
kshama2001 wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »Nice ones guys
I dumped my boyfriend today so I'm adding to my commitments list today.
4) I am putting my own interests first. I will value being single and by myself now and focusing on my own personal well being. I refuse to be responsible for someone else's happiness at the cost of my own happiness.
I'm sorry, Kriss. I really really hope 2018 is the complete opposite of 2017 for you.
I think there was a lot of people questioning on if I knew the difference between comments made out of complete ignorance and ones made to be intentionally hurtful.
Lol.. a big sigh of relief around the world. I do.
I am fairly tolerant of people opinions to a point.. even if I find them enraging I will take them in and process it logically.
However the boyfriends last words to me were that my father is scared to talk to me because I am skitzo-*kitten*-phranic. Every time I tried to explain that my dad isn't much of a talker over the phone so he says "uhm" or "uhh" a lot in the process he cut me off and told me to shut up and *kitten* off.
He has a problem with alcohol.. and the reason why I walked out of his life once was because he gets really obnoxious. He is egotistical and can say some hurtful things. He got drunk a few days ago because I shut my phone off and wanted to be alone and canceled our plans.
He told me while I was on the bus to see my dad that he was trying not to commit suicide because he was sad lately and that I was gone. then the next day he was drunk all day again and messaged me and said he was sad and lonely. I called 15 times and he wouldn't answer. I'm 4 hours away.. how would I know if something happened?
When he finally answered.. while I was relieved he was fine.. he was using me being at my father's as a reason to drink cause he had no one to keep him company.
I felt mad cause how can I enjoy spending time with my family while I'm worrying if he's gonna do something? (He had unsuccessfully tried twice years before I met him so it wasn't an over reaction)
But then that whole belittling conversation started. He blamed me for getting him started on the alcohol again.. but just a few days before he told me my binge eating disorder was imaginary and no one was forcing me to eat. So I should just stop paying for placebo pills that don't work and just put some effort in and just not eat.
However this same logic does not apply to him and alcohol and when I asked him about that I got silenced with more shut ups and *kitten* offs.
He told me that he often sneaks into my building and sits outside my apt door and listens but never knocks or tells me he is there. He claims this is to make sure I am still alive. I am his everything. His world. His life.
But he said he loves me and he doesn't know why anymore. I'm never happy. Doesn't understand why he stays in the relationship. He says I'm just staying in it cause I'm scared to be Alone. Then he went on the rant about how losing everything this year is my fault so I should just accept it. And then the stuff about my dad.
So I told him that he is free and it's over. He will probably drink all Christmas.. and won't sober up til his next shift. It won't be until then that he realizes what has happened.
Last time he really regretted it when I walked out.. but I gave him one more chance. There will not be another. I'm not a doormat lol.
The difference is.. I am not existing within the paradigm of his existence.. I don't need to see him every day to avoid feeling alone and depressed. He clearly did. He is going to have a hard time unfortunately.. but I can't keep putting him above myself. I've put on a lot of weight since meeting him and letting him really wear me down mentally. That changes now. I'm not going to be responsible for trying to maintain balance for his alcoholism.
Good for you! Emotional vampires are really draining, aren't they?
They are. I always wake up just mentally exhausted.. cause I know that these minutes yo myself are all i would get.. in fact I often couldn't even just sleep if I wanted.
I've been struggling with insomnia. So I've been falling asleep at 4 or 5am sometimes or I will be up for almost 2 days. When I finally fall asleep.. he texts me early. I don't reply so an hour later he texts me again. If I don't reply he calls. No matter how little sleep I got before he called he always said how late in the day it was and I was being lazy and wasting it. He will call me after the gym or call me when I'm up so we can go do something.. always wanting to go do something.. I wouldn't even be awake all the way yet before he wanted to know what the plan was for the day..
Lol..0 -
janejellyroll wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
A great supplement to this is to get your skin checked out by a medical professional if you have concerns about specific moles. My family has a history of skin cancer and I finally did it this year. The doctor charted my moles so we could track them going forward, I got one mole removed (it turned out to be benign), and the whole process gave me peace of mind!
Yes.. it's probably a good idea. People always ask me about this mole on my ear etc.. and honestly I didn't even know it was there and haven't really paid much mind.
Yeah, the one I got removed was on my back and I knew it was there, but it always freaked me out because I couldn't see it well and I was worried I would miss a danger sign.
My non-scale commitment for New Years is to really, truly, and honestly aim for at least seven hours of sleep per night. There are occasions due to my job where it really isn't possible, but except for that, I want to make it happen. Not just the "uh, I'm done with my book and there's nothing on TV so I'm going to get seven hours of sleep tonight" method I've been using in 2017.
I may have to invest in a sleep aid.. my eating disorder pills tend to keep me up I think since they are a stimulant. I did not take one yesterday tho.. and even tho I could of just closed my eyes and fell asleep in minutes.. I just wouldn't let myself.. I gotta remember I'm not gonna miss something by going to sleep.0 -
My non-weight, non-health related goals for 2018...
1) Learn to play the violin I received for Christmas. Learning to play the violin has been on my bucket list for years, and hubby did good this year!
2) Go to the skate park at least once a month. I learned the basics of how to ramp skate on quad skates over the past month, and it's something that I really want to improve at. I can skate on flat surfaces no problem (I'm a derby skater) but adding in the 3rd dimension is a challenge, but I am loving it!2 -
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HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »In 2018, I’m going to wear sunscreen every day, rain or shine. I would encourage everyone to do the same. Skin cancer is ugly, painful and mostly avoidable.
A great supplement to this is to get your skin checked out by a medical professional if you have concerns about specific moles. My family has a history of skin cancer and I finally did it this year. The doctor charted my moles so we could track them going forward, I got one mole removed (it turned out to be benign), and the whole process gave me peace of mind!
Yes.. it's probably a good idea. People always ask me about this mole on my ear etc.. and honestly I didn't even know it was there and haven't really paid much mind.
Yeah, the one I got removed was on my back and I knew it was there, but it always freaked me out because I couldn't see it well and I was worried I would miss a danger sign.
My non-scale commitment for New Years is to really, truly, and honestly aim for at least seven hours of sleep per night. There are occasions due to my job where it really isn't possible, but except for that, I want to make it happen. Not just the "uh, I'm done with my book and there's nothing on TV so I'm going to get seven hours of sleep tonight" method I've been using in 2017.
I may have to invest in a sleep aid.. my eating disorder pills tend to keep me up I think since they are a stimulant. I did not take one yesterday tho.. and even tho I could of just closed my eyes and fell asleep in minutes.. I just wouldn't let myself.. I gotta remember I'm not gonna miss something by going to sleep.
Are you taking your eating disorder meds early enough in your day so they won't interfere with your sleep?
1 mg of sublingual melatonin is great for helping me fall asleep fast. I need more help in order to stay asleep.0 -
Well.. sorta? Like.. my sleep schedule is all over the place right now but technically if I was to realign myself and take it when I get up in the morning I would still be up all night.
Melatonin gives me nightmares so I will probably just pick up an antihistamine instead0 -
Goals for 2018
1. Begin masters program.
2. Learn to sew enough to alter clothes.
3. Drop 3-4 lb/month.
4. Finish the FCC JavaScript course.
5. Finish the Coursera C++ course.
6. Repair the bikes.
7. Repair the kitchen ceiling.
8. Repair the bathroom floor.
9. Do a split and an un-assisted pull-up.
10. Visit with parents at least twice monthly.
11. Submit a proposal to present at the 2019 state convention.
12. Begin practicing piano again.
13. Plant a vegetable garden.
14. Do push-ups nose-to-floor.
15. Run 3 miles in <30 min.
16. Volunteer at library 50+ hours.
17. Dance classes / lessons. Samba, foxtrot, waltz, merengue.
18. Post to blog once a week each for language practice and career.
19. Replace DH’s wedding ring.
20. Audition for the role of Mark Antony in the summer production of Julius Caesar.
I kind of have a habit of overextending myself, but I think with some careful planning, all of this should be manageable. The next step is probably to start breaking these down into timelines and daily tasks.0
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