New Years is giving my anxiety about my diet

Losingthedamnweight

I’ve gotten back on the wagon after falling off horribly for half the year and its been going well for about a week (whoo!) but the thing that makes me nervous is not knowing what calories i put in my body. If i eat out, i always have a menu or something where i can log everything pretty accurately. But my wife got a gift card for Christmas to some seafood place and made reservations for us to go on new years and the very idea of going is giving me anxiety. I don’t see them listed on fitness pal or any calorie information and I don’t want to have any “cheat” meals after getting back to doing what i’m supposed to be doing so i feel kinda stuck.

What should i do? I don’t wanna have my wife outright cancel the reservations. I can tell it means a lot to her that we go

malibu927

It’s one night. Enjoy yourself, be mindful of what you’re eating, find entries that come as close as you can estimate to what you get.

ZRunner5Lulaica

Look through the menu and guesstimate. There are usually key words that indicate how they are cooked or may be higher calorie. For example, grilled or steamed would be a lighter dish than pan fried; creamy usually means heavier. You can also look for similar dishes at larger chains (Red Lobster, etc.), and use them to give you an idea.

RuNaRoUnDaFiEld

It's one day.

Choose the closest diary entries you can find and enjoy.

It's not healthy to be so restrictive that it stops you enjoying a meal out with your wife.
Happy New year

TavistockToad

1 meal won't make you fat, just like one salad won't make you thin

AnvilHead

Go enjoy the dinner and your wife's company and log whatever reasonable estimates you can find. Call it close enough and get back to it the next day. I've done it literally hundreds of times and still successfully lost all the weight I needed to. One meal isn't going to irreparably kill your diet.

Momepro

Exercise a little more and cut back your regular calories for a few days to compensate. One day isn't a big deal, if you can rebudget for it by havijng fewer calories the next few days.

aemsley05

If you can look up their menu in advance you can find equivalent "matches" to log instead. You can break dishes right down to log the seafood, veggies and other sides separately to help with accuracy. I love numbers and spreadsheets so I usually make a spreadsheet listing all my options and approximate calories so I can pick options that I both like and that fit my goals. You can always err on the side of caution and eat lighter or exercise more earlier in the day.

Remember also that you don't need to eat everything on your plate - get some boxed up to take away, or leave the potatoes if they don't fit your goals. Losing weight shouldn't cause you so much stress or to lose out on spending time (and having fun) with your loved ones. I know exactly how you feel as I still get a twinge of panic when we unexpectedly go out somewhere that I haven't looked up the menu for, but then I remember that I have learned to make sensible choices and besides, one meal won't lose all my progress. Hope you and your wife have a great time and a Happy New Year!

dutchandkiwi

Go for a fish that is grilled or steamed. Avoid oily fish and deep-fried fish Avoid creamy dished or butter sauce. If all dishes have the sauce then ask for it on the side so you can have it at your preferred QTY or not. (I pretty much always do it unless it is a planned over meal)
Cod for instance is quite low cal have a look through the UDSA database which fish would fit both your taste and calories.
Personally I love going to seafood restaurants as there is always something that fits my calorie goal and tastes great

aaiiee

Hmk so first of all stop letting mindful eating stress you. Doing so can easily lead to you feeling exasperated and potentially giving up.

When I'm out (other people's homes and restaurants) I focus of the ingridients and cooking methods. I then log it in by over estimating just a tad bit. The way I became decent at eyeballing my food when I go out is by weighing everything I cook. You'll get used to it. Just don't stress it.

Happy new year!

Unknown

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vanmep

It's probably a good idea to figure out a strategy for dealing with these situations because they come up all the time in life. When people talk about a lifestyle change vs a diet I think this is what they mean. I used to have very detailed, rigid plans for how I would deal with what/how I eat and exercise, then when the inevitable situations popped up that "interfered" with my plan, it would mean making dreadful choices like going to a party or a date with my SO vs sticking with my diet. Obviously the diet loses every time. Nowadays, my lifestyle accommodates for most of the time living within my goals and plans, but recognizing that there are going to be times that doesn't work. Of course that requires a strong level of engagement and involvement in your own life and health. I have just totally fallen off the wagon for two weeks. Back on today! Good luck and happy new year!!

Slay_each_day

You cant go wrong with anything that says "grilled", like grilled shrimp. Get baked potato plain, with the toppings on the side. Steamed veggies. Ask them how they prepare things. I love salads, so that would be my go to. Get the dressing on the side, so you can measure how much you want to put on the salad.

dragon_girl26

Seafood can actually be pretty calorie friendly, depending on what you get. Grilled and steamed options work very nicely, just don't forget about calories in any sauces!
Ultimately, I'd agree with everyone else, though. Just be mindful, enjoy yourself, and relax. You aren't going to gain all of your weight back from one meal. This is part of the learning process of how to eat a healthy diet and also live a normal life at the same time. You aren't always going to be able to log everything 100%, you just have to do the best you can. No reason to stress over it, and no need to feel guilty. We don't live to diet...we live to enjoy life with others.

cenafan

One meal won't derail you. Enjoy the night with your wife. Right back to in first meal of 2018.

lemurcat12

Estimate what you eat, don't let not being able to perfectly log put you in a frame of mind where it automatically becomes "a cheat meal," which I am interpreting as being way over your goal.

A seafood restaurant should not be too difficult -- you can log the fish, choose something grilled or broiled without a high cal sauce. Log some butter anyway (restaurants usually add more than you would at home, tastes good) or you can ask about preparation. Estimate the other ingredients used. Sides should not be too tough to estimate (again, assume more butter or the like than you would use at home).

If you get a salad to start, ask for the dressing on the side and go easy.

Skip dessert.

If you have a drink, that should not be too tough to log.

If you can look at the menu in advance (where I am many nice restaurants have their menus online even if they change frequently and although they have no calorie counts), you can even try out some prelogging.

Another option is to log a blanket high cal number and eat light the rest of the day to make room and then eat without worrying about it (but don't use that as an excuse to totally ignore good choices or stuff yourself).

These are things that come up sometimes -- it's okay to have fun.

I lost 95 lbs in 2014-15, and during that period ate out at least once a week almost every week at a restaurant with no calorie count, and just estimated. It was fine, I lost on schedule.

brittneyalley

My husband and I started sharing a plate. Maybe that’s something you and your wife could do. You save money, and don’t overeat. Another thing is we never order soda while out. Saves even more money, and I’d rather eat my calories than drink them.

kwindert1

Don’t think of this as a cheat meal or what you are doing as a diet. This should be long term goals for healthier eating and that means knowing how to make smart choices and not stressing over every calorie, because if you stress over every calorie for the rest of your life you will drive yourself insane. Smart choices at a seafood restaurant would be baked/broiled/grilled fish with veggies on the side. Shrimp is usually fine too. Avoid breaded/fried options if you are worried about the calories. Start with a salad for extra help in feeling full, don’t go overboard with dressing as a lot of calories hide there. Splitting an appetizer of shrimp cocktail is nice too! Enjoy your dinner!