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Going through something hard. About racial identity.

Workout4Health
Workout4Health Posts: 447 Member
edited November 2024 in Chit-Chat
I seriously am asking for advice because something is bothering me deeply. So one of my distant cousins who is Caucasian asked my mom if she’s from a certain country. That’s the first question she asked. And she’s a nice girl. She asked it nicely but it feels odd.

And she asked me if my Caucasian uncle is racist. It’s the first question she asked.

This is making me question my identity and where I belong. I grew up in America and it’s all I know. But I feel like crap now because I feel every time she sees me she is gonna ask these questions. I don’t like them. It makes me feel like I’m different from her. Should I feel different?

She’s just so intrigued. But is there a polite way I can tell her that she doesn’t need to ask about race and culture every single discussion? It’s just not something most people do.
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Replies

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  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
    We need to take your beautiful mind and put it in a robot version of carrot top’s body
  • Unknown
    edited January 2018
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  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    edited January 2018
    Merkavar wrote: »
    Is there a way to subscribe to a user so I get notified when ever they post?

    I am on holidays at the moment and these threads are an entertaining mess of silliness, over thinking, trolling and making mountain out of molehills.

    giphy.gif

    I wish I had time to troll. You make so many assumptions.

    The trolling wasn’t just aimed at you. Others in these threads seem to be trolling to.

    But you have enough time to make posts like these where you over analyses minor questions or actions of others?
  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    edited January 2018
    SLLeask wrote: »
    Okay, I'm going to bite because, well, I'm bored... If you know this girl is a "nice girl" then I'm assuming you have met her in order to form this opinion. Therefore it's not the first conversation she has had with either your mother or you. She has asked two questions of two different people, both of a very different nature so why would you assume that every time you see her (are you expecting to see her a lot suddenly?!) she is going to only ask racial or cultural questions?! I think you are either trolling or just overly sensitive.

    As for me, I have lived in a couple of different countries other than my home country. I love, love, LOVE meeting people of new nationalities, cultures and religions. I am utterly fascinated by people and I ask a million questions about where they are from, the way they live their lives and how they view the rest of the world. Gosh I've learnt so much and now understand much better WHY people think differently maybe than I do. I am more open and tolerant to other peoples' viewpoints, I may still disagree with the way they think but can understand why they think their way.

    Maybe your distant cousin is just curious and wants to know about her family members. Maybe she's just maing conversation. What's odd about that? And oh, if you are a different colour than her (I am assuming since you made a big deal out of telling us she is Caucasian that you are not!) , then newsflash, you ARE different to her... So...? Every single one of us is unique and "different" to the next person. What's the great secret about where you / your parents / other family members are from? Personally I think you are making this into an issue that doesn't exist.


    There you go again saying I’m not Caucasian. I am part Caucasian and that’s how most people perceive me.

    People must not have double standards. If it’s interesting that I’m also another race then it’s just as interesting to be white too. Stop calling me different.

    In a country like America, white isn’t that interesting(being the majority), so no it is not a double standard.

    White is everywhere, in the movies, tv, ads, politics, everywhere.

    So something other than Caucasian is going to be more interesting. Prompt more questions.

    Like a bright red and green bird is more interesting when surrounded by grey pigeons.
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    edited January 2018
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.
  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.
  • MichelleWithMoxie
    MichelleWithMoxie Posts: 1,817 Member
    6ls317rwzm3p.jpeg
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    edited January 2018
    Merkavar wrote: »
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.

    Exactly, me too. So yesterday when he was on the whole kissing the bar waitress thing, I was like, wait what? You are old enough to be in a bar?

    So i searched the username and he posted in the “30 something’s” forum that he’s 32. Also, he’s had this profile since 2014, so it’s not like a new troll profile. In 2015 he was asking strange questions about showering procedures in he gym.

    Then again, this is the internet and lies are common.
  • MichelleWithMoxie
    MichelleWithMoxie Posts: 1,817 Member
    Merkavar wrote: »
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.

    ...anyone watched/watching the show Mindhunter on Netflix...?
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  • xFunctionalStrengthx
    xFunctionalStrengthx Posts: 4,928 Member
    SLLeask wrote: »
    Okay, I'm going to bite because, well, I'm bored... If you know this girl is a "nice girl" then I'm assuming you have met her in order to form this opinion. Therefore it's not the first conversation she has had with either your mother or you. She has asked two questions of two different people, both of a very different nature so why would you assume that every time you see her (are you expecting to see her a lot suddenly?!) she is going to only ask racial or cultural questions?! I think you are either trolling or just overly sensitive.

    As for me, I have lived in a couple of different countries other than my home country. I love, love, LOVE meeting people of new nationalities, cultures and religions. I am utterly fascinated by people and I ask a million questions about where they are from, the way they live their lives and how they view the rest of the world. Gosh I've learnt so much and now understand much better WHY people think differently maybe than I do. I am more open and tolerant to other peoples' viewpoints, I may still disagree with the way they think but can understand why they think their way.

    Maybe your distant cousin is just curious and wants to know about her family members. Maybe she's just maing conversation. What's odd about that? And oh, if you are a different colour than her (I am assuming since you made a big deal out of telling us she is Caucasian that you are not!) , then newsflash, you ARE different to her... So...? Every single one of us is unique and "different" to the next person. What's the great secret about where you / your parents / other family members are from? Personally I think you are making this into an issue that doesn't exist.


    There you go again saying I’m not Caucasian. I am part Caucasian and that’s how most people perceive me.

    People must not have double standards. If it’s interesting that I’m also another race then it’s just as interesting to be white too. Stop calling me different.



    Just stop with the BS posting please. You are one race: Human. Skin color doesn't matter, sexual orientation doesn't matter, religion, etc. Noe of it *kitten* matters. Be the best person you can be and stop *kitten* worrying (and posting) about the *kitten* little things.
  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    Merkavar wrote: »
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.

    Exactly, me too. So yesterday when he was on the whole kissing the bar waitress thing, I was like, wait what? You are old enough to be in a bar?

    So i searched the username and he posted in the “30 something’s” forum that he’s 32. Also, he’s had this profile since 2014, so it’s not like a new troll profile. In 2015 he was asking strange questions about showering procedures in he gym.

    Then again, this is the internet and lies are common.

    So in other words your saying to not annoy you cause you will hack my computer and release my unpublished beauty and the beast fan fiction?

    :tongue:
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  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    Merkavar wrote: »
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.

    Exactly, me too. So yesterday when he was on the whole kissing the bar waitress thing, I was like, wait what? You are old enough to be in a bar?

    So i searched the username and he posted in the “30 something’s” forum that he’s 32. Also, he’s had this profile since 2014, so it’s not like a new troll profile. In 2015 he was asking strange questions about showering procedures in he gym.

    Then again, this is the internet and lies are common.

    Your spy skills are impressive.

    I always wished I could be a secret agent or a PI.

    This is as close as I can get
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    Merkavar wrote: »
    Merkavar wrote: »
    It’s interesting that you mention you are part Caucasian regularly, but have we heard what your other race is in your racial profile? Not that I’ve seen, which strikes me as odd. Either you have some serious identity issues or obvious troll. Also, you live or lived in San Fran and are 32 per posts you made on this forum years ago (yes I searched your username because reasons mostly curiosity about famous MFP troll).

    I find it strange that someone of your age and in a VERY diverse city would think of any of these things.

    Something doesn’t add up.

    Wait, 32? I assumed he was actually 16 or maybe 22 at max, the way he talks about girls not liking him, cousins etc I had the image in my head of someone fairly young.

    Exactly, me too. So yesterday when he was on the whole kissing the bar waitress thing, I was like, wait what? You are old enough to be in a bar?

    So i searched the username and he posted in the “30 something’s” forum that he’s 32. Also, he’s had this profile since 2014, so it’s not like a new troll profile. In 2015 he was asking strange questions about showering procedures in he gym.

    Then again, this is the internet and lies are common.

    So in other words your saying to not annoy you cause you will hack my computer and release my unpublished beauty and the beast fan fiction?

    :tongue:

    Bahahaha better watch out!

    Nah I just wanted to expose the troll! You are not a troll (yet)
  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    edited January 2018
    SLLeask wrote: »
    Okay, I'm going to bite because, well, I'm bored... If you know this girl is a "nice girl" then I'm assuming you have met her in order to form this opinion. Therefore it's not the first conversation she has had with either your mother or you. She has asked two questions of two different people, both of a very different nature so why would you assume that every time you see her (are you expecting to see her a lot suddenly?!) she is going to only ask racial or cultural questions?! I think you are either trolling or just overly sensitive.

    As for me, I have lived in a couple of different countries other than my home country. I love, love, LOVE meeting people of new nationalities, cultures and religions. I am utterly fascinated by people and I ask a million questions about where they are from, the way they live their lives and how they view the rest of the world. Gosh I've learnt so much and now understand much better WHY people think differently maybe than I do. I am more open and tolerant to other peoples' viewpoints, I may still disagree with the way they think but can understand why they think their way.

    Maybe your distant cousin is just curious and wants to know about her family members. Maybe she's just maing conversation. What's odd about that? And oh, if you are a different colour than her (I am assuming since you made a big deal out of telling us she is Caucasian that you are not!) , then newsflash, you ARE different to her... So...? Every single one of us is unique and "different" to the next person. What's the great secret about where you / your parents / other family members are from? Personally I think you are making this into an issue that doesn't exist.


    There you go again saying I’m not Caucasian. I am part Caucasian and that’s how most people perceive me.

    People must not have double standards. If it’s interesting that I’m also another race then it’s just as interesting to be white too. Stop calling me different.



    Just stop with the BS posting please. You are one race: Human. Skin color doesn't matter, sexual orientation doesn't matter, religion, etc. Noe of it *kitten* matters. Be the best person you can be and stop *kitten* worrying (and posting) about the *kitten* little things.

    I said I’m just one race too but people in this thread say I’m different

    Everyone is different. Why do you think you shouldn’t be?

    You have on multiple occasions said you are mixed. So you are one race but also mixed?

    Are you have Caucasian and also have Caucasian?
  • xFunctionalStrengthx
    xFunctionalStrengthx Posts: 4,928 Member
    SLLeask wrote: »
    Okay, I'm going to bite because, well, I'm bored... If you know this girl is a "nice girl" then I'm assuming you have met her in order to form this opinion. Therefore it's not the first conversation she has had with either your mother or you. She has asked two questions of two different people, both of a very different nature so why would you assume that every time you see her (are you expecting to see her a lot suddenly?!) she is going to only ask racial or cultural questions?! I think you are either trolling or just overly sensitive.

    As for me, I have lived in a couple of different countries other than my home country. I love, love, LOVE meeting people of new nationalities, cultures and religions. I am utterly fascinated by people and I ask a million questions about where they are from, the way they live their lives and how they view the rest of the world. Gosh I've learnt so much and now understand much better WHY people think differently maybe than I do. I am more open and tolerant to other peoples' viewpoints, I may still disagree with the way they think but can understand why they think their way.

    Maybe your distant cousin is just curious and wants to know about her family members. Maybe she's just maing conversation. What's odd about that? And oh, if you are a different colour than her (I am assuming since you made a big deal out of telling us she is Caucasian that you are not!) , then newsflash, you ARE different to her... So...? Every single one of us is unique and "different" to the next person. What's the great secret about where you / your parents / other family members are from? Personally I think you are making this into an issue that doesn't exist.


    There you go again saying I’m not Caucasian. I am part Caucasian and that’s how most people perceive me.

    People must not have double standards. If it’s interesting that I’m also another race then it’s just as interesting to be white too. Stop calling me different.



    Just stop with the BS posting please. You are one race: Human. Skin color doesn't matter, sexual orientation doesn't matter, religion, etc. Noe of it *kitten* matters. Be the best person you can be and stop *kitten* worrying (and posting) about the *kitten* little things.

    I said I’m just one race too but people in this thread say I’m different

    So, then why bother posting? You're worrying about trivial *kitten*. Live your life and stop *kitten* worrying about whether you get facebook likes, your cousin thinks something about you, etc.

    Log out from the internet, and go enjoy life and stop *kitten* worrying about stupid *kitten*.
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  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    You see these racial threads you start get people very upset with you. Some loyalty, huh? They're all giggles and tee hees when you speak of HIIT, Eminem, strippers, high heels, kisses, large tips, facebook angst and cousins.

    Is it true you're in your early 30s and live in San Francisco? I hear rent on a one bedroom starts at like $2,000 a month. You must be wealthy.


    Wait I want privacy. Are you trying to figure out who I am? Are people on this forum able to?

    I don't know how she figured that out. I always thought you were in your early 20s and from Hong Kong but a frequent visitor to Poland, but that was just speculation on my part. The kids on this site are very adept at figuring things out as they were raised predominantly by electronica. You just can't turn your back on them for a minute because they really have the upper hand in this venue.

    All I did was search by username and scrolled through to see what caught my eye. You’re the one who posted it, I didn’t hack you. Pahlease
    el4jbkosctqa.jpeg
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  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    I'm old(ish) and crap with technology and even I could have found out that info on here in a couple of minutes.
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    edited January 2018
    Sorry @newmeadow !
This discussion has been closed.