No Willpower

Options
sandraakrueger
sandraakrueger Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I am 70 years young and really can't stand how I look. I have absolutely no willpower as my husband wants to eat 24/7. I'm fine until he starts mentioning things that he wants to eat...that plants a seed in my head and from that point on, my mind is working just like his. I've asked him to just get what he wants to eat and no talk about it to me but, that will last a day! I need major support!

Replies

  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
    Options
    Have you started logging and tracking your food? If you are just starting, why don't you just start with tracking--eat what you want, especially when he plants that seed in your head, and log it. I think that if you follow this discipline for a week or so, you will start getting a good feel for how many calories are in the things that you like, and it will give you a tool to start saying, oh this cookie has 200 calories and I want it so I will eat it; that doughnut has 300 calories and I don't in particular like them, so I am going to skip that. Or if you mess up, you learn that you can burn 200 or whatever calories by walking for an hour, so leave his butt sitting on the couch and get outside!

    Knowledge can be a powerful tool for developing will power.

    It sounds like your husband is pretty thoughtless, and since he is not going to change, you are the one who is going to have to build up small steps that can help exercise that willpower muscle. On the days you fail, just dust yourself off and keep trying again. And surely there will be days you succeed.

    The ultimate goal is to entrench good HABITS, and if you have those good habits, you will just follow them and won't need the willpower. So remember that as you struggle through the tough part.

    Best wishes to you!
  • jenchu1979
    jenchu1979 Posts: 9 Member
    Options
    I've had similar problems. My DH loves his sodas, and while I can deal with that, he picks me up junk food while he's in the store getting his sodas. And not just any junk food, but snack cakes! He thinks he's being sweet (no pun intended) but I have trouble saying no to them. The key is communication. Ask him to stop talking about it, explain why, and keep yourself from yelling at him, which is also my problem. I get frustrated and just go off.
  • alicebhsia
    alicebhsia Posts: 179 Member
    Options
    i've found that exercise is more important in getting fit and losing weight than what you eat, for me at least. of course overeating calorie-wise will put on weight, but exercise does so much. maybe you could take the focus off of food so much and just try to incorporate more exercise into your life. eating less i think will come naturally after that.
  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
    Options
    jenchu1979 wrote: »
    I've had similar problems. My DH loves his sodas, and while I can deal with that, he picks me up junk food while he's in the store getting his sodas. And not just any junk food, but snack cakes! He thinks he's being sweet (no pun intended) but I have trouble saying no to them. The key is communication. Ask him to stop talking about it, explain why, and keep yourself from yelling at him, which is also my problem. I get frustrated and just go off.

    I can sympathize with the yelling part. :#:# However, again, if the husbands are in a particular habit, they are entrenched, and there is no point in creating drama, because obviously he is not listening. If my husband were actively feeding me something I could not moderate, I would a) leave the house immediately and return it to the store, or b) immediately donate it to the foodbank, or put it in a bag marked food bank, and (tell yourself) don't touch it, because that food is for people who are in need.

    If they see discipline and willpower on your part, then they might start to change.
  • billkansas
    billkansas Posts: 267 Member
    Options
    Oh sure, blame it all on the hubby! :)
    Willpower is like a muscle. Every little time you deny yourself it gets stronger.
  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
    Options
    alicebhsia wrote: »
    i've found that exercise is more important in getting fit and losing weight than what you eat, for me at least. of course overeating calorie-wise will put on weight, but exercise does so much. maybe you could take the focus off of food so much and just try to incorporate more exercise into your life. eating less i think will come naturally after that.

    "You can't outrun the fork." Exercise is crucial for health, but even on a day I spend an hour lifting very heavy weights and another hour doing intense cardio, I could wipe that entire burn out with a really good PB&J, or two doughnuts and a bag on nuts. I am 45 and have built up a considerable foundation of athleticism, not 70 and just getting started. Exercise isn't going to help if the eating is not under control, and there are many miserable people hamster-wheeling away for hours in the gym and frustrated from lack of progress that are not getting the insights they need.

Categories